7 Things Only NOOB Bikers Do

Whoa, hey, hey, slow down there. Hi, I'm Yammy Noob, Duke Attista, Yamaha fan, and Triumph's second source of income without receiving any credit or kickbacks. Since a lot of you guys and girls that view my content don't have a motorcycle yet, stick with me long enough and I will give you one. Don't believe me? Hit the links below, I'm giving away some free motorcycles. Today's video is about the things, seven to be exact, that only noob bikers do. These are the things that you can put to field use immediately. You don't own a bike? Pay close attention to the next time you see a biker try to leave a parking lot or pay attention to them at a red light. Do they stall? Do they waddle? Do they seem uncomfortable? Well, you too can now judge them even though you yourself don't own a bike. I know who you are, Trevor. I know what you've done, or rather I know what you haven't done yet, which is get a bike, you bike-less bro. Without further ado, let's get going. Number one, U-turns. If you've ever seen a video or a live demonstration of a U-turn, it looks easy. Seriously, look at Motojitsu's videos on how to U-turn any bike. There's lots of good information there. Noobs can't U-turn and because of that, they'll normally do one of three things. First, they'll run wide on the turn or just not execute it, sometimes stopping to prevent themselves from going off-road or coming to a complete stop so nothing bad happens. Second, they'll put their foot down. Yeah, sometimes you need to in order to save the bike, but you should be able to execute a U-turn on any bike within two and a half to three parking spots wide, the standard width of a standard road in America. Standard. And third and lastly, they'll just drop the bike. Now, props to guys dropping the bikes because it means you're attempting the U-turn and not just putting a foot down. They're at least counter balancing a little bit. Honestly, it's just hardcore commitment to just bend the bike during a U-turn and I can really respect that. If you don't know where the limit is, how will you ever learn? Expect to drop the bike, my young squidlets. Now go out there, stop being a noob and get some serious low-speed practice on your bikes. Get frame sliders, cages, whatever you need to, but learn your bike inside and out and get more practice. Don't be that guy that simply can't U-turn his bike at a gas station, but instead does them perfectly. Number two, stalling. No, not the communist, although Yammy does have a 10-year plan. Stalling or letting your engine die while trying to move from a dead stop is what noobs always do. If you've driven a manual transmission car, then you know exactly what stalling means. Too much clutch, not enough gas, or simply not enough gas. When a motorcycle stalls, the weatherman gets excited. Suddenly, there's a 60% chance of a bike drop in the forecast. In all seriousness, stalling a bike can really shake up a new rider. If the bike was actually moving but then stalls out, it has a chance of dropping. The bike won't have enough momentum to continue forward and execute a push or roll start, like with your grandpa's old station wagon down a hill. No, the bike will lunge forward to lock up the transmission in the fastest way left or right, which is usually down. Be prepared, because a falling bike gets heavier than the guilt of not telling your wife you bought another bike. Maybe you should just buy three right out of the gate instead of one, because if you're going to get backlash for spending your own hard-earned money, you might as well go all out. In fact, that's not a bad idea. Get a Ninja 300, a ZX10, and then a Turbo Busa. That way, you're covered for the next five years of your life. I'll be the first to admit that I've stalled plenty of bikes in my day, but I'm here to tell you that the frequency with which you stall those bikes will go down over time. Some bikes are just trickier than others. A perfect example is the giveaway KTM RC390 that I had earlier this year. That bike ran so lean from the factory that gym bros were DMing it asking for its secrets. You'd swear that bike was 3% body fat the way it was so lean. Anyways, it was so lean that if you even breathed on the clutch incorrectly when pulling away from a stop, it would just die on you. It was extremely annoying. Noobs will stall, fall, and hopefully get back on the saddle. How many times you stall is an indication of how many hot girls or other people you're trying to impress are around, how steep the hill is, or simply how big of noob you are. Number three, the inability to wheelie. Oh, so after watching Torque or Biker Boys, you've decided to get a bike and start stunting, huh? Well, if you're a total noob, then you're not going to be doing wheelies for a long time. What may seem like it's impossible for some will be easy for others. Hey, your papa can't rip mega tank nooners either. It's kind of a hit or miss thing. If you or a loved one has contracted the horrible disease known as wheelie dysfunction syndrome, ask your physician about a new treatment option known as Turbobusa. Turbobusa is different from traditional wheelie correctional treatments because it goes right to the source, namely your weak-ass bike's lack of power. By focusing on giving you over 280 horsepower to the rear wheel, Turbobusa can address all of your wheelie problems. Ask a doctor today about Turbobusa. Turbobusa is not a supplement to a healthy diet of practice patient understanding when it comes to motorcycling. Turbobusa cannot guarantee you won't still suck at wheelies. Turbobusa is not for any damage to your sleep, suicidal thoughts, loss of friendships, binge-watching disorder on YouTube, or addiction to chrome and stretch. Turbobusa should not be taken in conjunction with gooch juices. This could cause a range of issues such as diarrhea, vomiting, insomnia, manic thoughts, listless dreams about Valentina Rossi, and complete lack of control over your finances. Now, wheelies still take skill to perform as well as an understanding of the associated mechanics. In basic terms, you're overpowering your rear wheel, causing the front wheel to come off the ground. Easier said than done because some people will need weeks or months to practice. The biggest fear about wheelies is looping, or suddenly flipping the bike backwards. Thanks to YouTube, we've seen hundreds of videos of people looping their bikes while practicing a wheelie. In reality, if you try a wheelie in second gear instead of first and go for the clutch up, you can slowly get comfortable and get your front wheel off the ground, and it's not going to instantly rip backwards behind you. They will come with time. Understand that weight position, RPM, tire pressure, and throttle control are all a part of a wheelie. Now, I've seen a lot of comments asking for a wheelie tutorial video, so I might do a collab with another YouTuber, Instagrammer, and make videos on how to do wheelies. I might even learn too. Hell, I've got a DRZ400 in my garage right now. I better put it to good use. Leave it to Yammy Noob to buy a giveaway motorcycle and then learn how to wheelie on it. What a chump. Number four, waddling. Penguins live in the Antarctic and don't ride crotch rockets. For the noobs out there, stop waddling. This is your biggest telltale that you just started riding yesterday. If you need to put a foot down, put your left foot down. Your right foot is used for the rear brake, you know, to hold a hill, allowing your hands to do a hill start. When a rider waddles, they're pushing the bike forward with their feet, not the engine. Why do noobs do this? It's because they honestly don't have enough trust in their clutch and throttle capable. It's because they honestly don't have enough trust in their clutch and throttle applications. As a skilled rider, you should be able to take your bike from a dead stop, release the clutch, and give it throttle while simultaneously lifting your feet off the ground. You don't need to balance it by waddling it forward or to get it going. You don't need to do it in slow speeds. The bike will be more balanced the faster you go, which is a lot faster than you can waddle at. This goes double for off-road riding. Any off-road specialist is going to tell you that you should never be putting your feet down. You should always be standing on your bike's pegs and you should never be waddling along unless you absolutely have to. When you can seriously get start and stops down, you'll stop waddling. Number five, afraid of road hazards and basic weather. If you learned it in the basic rider course, awesome. The most hazardous thing you probably rode over was a 2x4 in your path on the range. Maybe you saw a PowerPoint slide about sand, gravel, oil, wet roads, or riding in bad weather. As a total noob, you're probably going to freak out when a sudden downpour happens or if you see sand or gravel in your pathway and you can't move away from it. Don't. Being scared causes you to tense up, especially mid-corner. If you go tense, the bike is going to feed back directly into your body. It'll fatigue you. You're If you're mid-corner and you see some sand or gravel, simply lighten up. Let the bike work around it. It might shuffle around a little bit, but you'll probably make it through. Unless it's extremely gnarly and a huge sand pit, you're probably going to be fine. Being afraid of road hazards is worse than the hazards themselves. If you're afraid of problems while cornering, watch a twist of the wrist. I know I mention it all the time, but guys, it's such a good video. It's such a good primer to understand a motorcycle rider. Remember, be mentally prepared and don't panic. Practice riding in bad weather near your house if you have to so you're not stranded miles away from home. Number six, excessive input. This is kind of a catch-all for all you noobs out there, but we all know you do it. When you input too much on your bike, things get kind of hairy and sometimes even bad. Noobs don't know their bikes yet, so when they need to brake, throttle, release the clutch, or shift, things don't go as planned. When noobs overbrake, they grab the front so hard that they lunge forward, smacking their genitals into the gas tank, or stomp on the rear so hard that they start skidding it out. It's a telltale sign of a panic maneuver and it needs to be refined. When a noob hits the throttle, they might just go wide open in times when they don't or shouldn't, or maybe they didn't think they would, or they might not use it enough in cornering or starting out. Sometimes a noob will shift with the throttle wide open even. For the clutch, well, as we said, they're gonna stall. For shifting, it's always the one-two shift. A noob will have a Gixxer 600 revved to 15,000 RPMs and then misshift into second, going into neutral instead, and then just rev the crap out of the motor. It happens, it's okay. Sometimes it's the bike's fault, honestly. If you don't hit it hard enough, it goes into neutral, it happens. But noobs tend to just do this a lot more than seasoned riders. As a noob, learn your engagement points for all your controls, get used to being smoother about how you apply them, and remember, be smooth and gentle. If you're smooth, the bike will do what you want it to do. A great point of advice. Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast. And number seven, buying too much bike. Yep, papa is here to lay it on thick. Motorcycling is a fun and adventurous hobby. It's great for soul-searching, clearing your head, and hell, going super fast. But for the total noobs out there who probably haven't subbed to my channel, they're probably gonna buy too much bike. Look at Cycle Trader, Craigslist, or other sites, and you'll soon realize that too many people buy 600s and liter bikes without having the necessary experience. Having dirt bike experience from 10 years ago does not equate to buying a 1000cc displacement starter bike. As the ultimate noob, you probably bought a bike based on what the salesman said, the bigger numbers, and then some weird feeling of being macho by getting yourself a badass starter bike. Newsflash, if you started on a 300, you wouldn't be badass, you'd be alive. I can't guarantee the same or similar results if you bought too much bike. Some squids will pick up your slightly used R6 for dirt cheap now. Well noobs, what do you think? Are these things that you have done while you're a beginner rider, do you still do them? Let me know in the comments below because you know me, there's gonna be a part 2 to this video. And again, be sure to check out our beginner bike giveaway series. If you're one of those 44% of my audience that don't own a bike yet, you're gonna want to get pre-registered and receive an email as soon as we're ready to go live, and you'll get first crack at registering to win. We're gonna have a brand new line of merch as well, so if you want to receive a special discount code, be sure to sign up, hit that link, and learn more. Thanks again for watching, tune in next time, see you later. Fact. If you ever spot a flock of ravens hanging out together, what you're seeing is called an unkindness or a conspiracy of ravens.