More on Feedback and Q and A.

Hello and welcome to Real Magic Review. My name is Steve Faulkner and I'm going to talk at you and thanks for coming. A couple of comments already. Thank you. Nice to have someone there. Um, before we do this, which is not reviews, the comments and comments where I read comments and answer them and maybe go off on one, uh, little discussions and the like. But before I do that, can you please, after this, go and check out onlinemagic.co, that's my online magic course. Uh, over 600 videos, 97 tonight it will be, I think. Um, live, uh, live sessions. And last week we had Steve Reynolds. That was such a great session. Steve coaches me every couple of weeks because as I've said before, I think if you are to coach people, you should be coached. And, uh, and it's just so helpful. And his session was just, just great. It was just full of, there was loads of effects for, you know, all levels, no knuckle busting stuff and just really commercial good stuff. Now it's uploaded on the course. Now I'll read you a little review, um, from trust pilot for my latest. I'm not going to, I haven't asked for a permit, but actually I think you can share it anyway. But anyway, I'll just say first name. Todd says, this is so awesome. I'm overjoyed to have found Steve in his online class. What a wealth of information for what he charges is simply mind boggling. I'm really excited. And so happy I pulled the trigger on this thing. Yay. Thanks. There you go. That's not from me. That's from somebody else. Uh, magic corner. How you doing Ezekiel? How are you Gary? Nice to see that. Manish Terry. Um, so I've got a bit, I'm a bit throaty. My voice is going, I think. So I better be a bit careful, uh, not to do too long because I tend to, if you've got any questions, do let me know. So I've, um, I've quietened my voice now and stopped shouting. So I've got to do a live session after this tonight. I'm for the course. I'm teaching, uh, Harapan's given me permission to teach a great effect off of, um, optics perspective. That's great. Optics is great by the way. I do a full review soon, but it's, I've just started to learn everything off it, which is a bit silly because 26 things. Um, but why have I done that? It's not like I'm busy or anything. So I will, I'm going to do some comments on dealing with negative feedback, which is the last thing. So that's why I said on the title of it, it's going to be more on that because I'm going to add a couple of questions or comments on that. Uh, one handed top palm, a couple of comments on that. I'll answer and unhanded by JP Valerino. Valerino is Valerino, isn't it? Um, which I did the live review on this week. So any questions, any of those fire away. But first of all, Rob says, this is on, uh, we'll go for the one on the top palm. Cause there's only a couple on that. Uh, Maxi max says, I don't think it's misdirection per se. Uh, that's important with this move. More understanding off beats and on beats, something I'm always hopping on about on discord and talking about discord people's palace of prestigious digitization. I would look at the link below. There's a couple of courses there as well. The spectator can have their attention right on the deck, but with good timing, the move will still go totally unnoticed. I totally agree. And I suppose when I talk about misdirection, um, I, I kind of incorporate that in my head anyway, as well. So, so misdirection, as I say, my cups and balls routine, I'm not getting you to look away from the table. I'm getting you to think away from the table and it's that thing. They can be looking at it, but if everything's natural, um, and there's nothing to see, I mean, it's just such a, is this set up? Yes. It's such a lovely move. So from there, it was a bit flashy there, but, but it's just nice. So I think you're right. Mexico, you know, it, it, there's nothing to see. Um, and that's, what's lovely about it. And I think, but with, with that kind of offbeat on beat thing and knowing also when not to tense up, when you're doing a move is all part. Brulafu, how you doing? It's all part of the kind of misdirection, I suppose, in a way, in the same way, I suppose that time misdirection is misdirection. Uh, but Tom says definitely a knacky moves. This is what I plan to talk with you about when I meet you in person. It looks effortless in your hands and that's my end goal. Yeah. And I think it's just, I've done it so much. I mean, I really do overuse this move. I do it all the time and I know a lot of people don't like it, but it feels smooth to me. I don't mean it looks smooth, but some people say it's a bit of a jerky move. But to me, I think it's, and I'm not worried about that. I'm pretty sure nobody, everybody watching this is a magician, but you know, I think that it's a, it feels to me when you get it smooth, if you see what I mean. Now, um, Glen Morphew has a slightly different take on it and his, his, your, your hand kind of looks empty. You know, you can hold your hand like that and do it. It's, it's incredible. And he's got a download load on it, which is very, um, reasonable. So check out Glen Morphew's work on the one handed top palm as well. Uh, and then, Oh, and there you go. It looks great, Steve. That's what he said on the, um, uh, on the comments there. So that's the one handed top palm, the negative feedback. We had a couple on this talking about the criticism that I got and I was using that as a, as a reason to talk about receiving negative feedback. Um, Martian magician says this is a very interesting and honest Eckhart Tolle's or Tolle's work is worth reading or listening to all about recognizing our true selves and not our egos. I really love Eckhart Tolle. I think it is Tolle, isn't it? Um, love the Paranal, love listening to him. He's a lovely individual as well. A lovely human being. Uh, and I think a lot of that has really helped me that, that trying so hard to eradicate the ego in our work is very, very difficult. And I can tell this because, you know, in my show the other day when I got something wrong, which I am going to do a separate video on, but I want to get the footage to show you. I kind of messed up at the end of John Allen's the pain game, which I don't want to expose it, but I want to show you kind of what went wrong and take that apart a bit. Cause I did two routines that weren't great, which affected my ego a little bit. But I think the difference was that I kind of got over it pretty quickly. And you know, compared to years ago when I would really struggle, um, you know, from, from days and days after getting something wrong. I think that's, that's just that practice. And again, talking about receiving feedback is the same thing. Um, Chris says a relatively pleasantly delivered criticism. However, I'm concerned that someone who leads a life that one minute 45 is so important is putting time pressures on themselves. That isn't too healthy living in the new forest means I always make time to stop and take time to appreciate the world. I'm sure you wish all the criticism was so nicely delivered. Uh, yeah. And I do. And I do. And I like to say criticism nicely delivered is fine. And I know what you mean. I do. And even me, I have to stop myself sometimes. I always think about Dennis Potter, the playwright when he was dying of lung cancer, had a interview with Melvin Bragg broadcast on TV and you can buy the book of it. I think I've talked about this before maybe, but, um, he took the book, he's called seeing the blossoms and he talks about seeing the blossoms and knowing he's at the end of his life. You know, when he sees the blossoms, he really sees them. He's in the moment with them, seeing their beauty. And I think that that is, you know, it's, it's kind of mindfulness in action, really. And I think that, yeah, when I always feel that I'm getting to a point of rushing, which I do a lot, you know, and look at the time, I'm sometimes obsessed with time of not having enough of it. I talk about it all the time. I stop and go, you know, you're never going to feel like you have enough time to do all the things you want to do. So just accept it and be with it. And I think with practicing magic, that's really important as well, is not to not to be reading a magic book. I want to get to the end of it and get to the next book. And it's a really difficult thing for me to do. If I get excited about the next and yeah, I'm going off on one, of course, but that's all good. Um, maxi max, I posted a thing on the discord just the other day, uh, about feedback basically boils down to when you get some asked two questions about it, this forces you to actually think about it rather than brush it off or react emotionally. And it also changes things into a collaboration rather than attacking defense. It's a great, great idea just to make yourself ask questions or get people to expand on it. Great video. Even though you took too long to get to without you mentioning the people of Palestine, did you press dip press? Why can't I say it? I've been saying it for years. Press digitation. It's not pressed digitation. Oh my gosh. I look like I started texting genuine emotions can get muddled. So I always fall back on mums. If you haven't got anything nice to say, et cetera. Um, Tom Rolfe, excellent subject to discuss. Many relationship has been ruined by even ruined by even giving feedback in a poor way or receiving it bad. You absolutely agree. Key points you raised are strongly agree with asking someone if they'd like feedback in Excel, what specifically on before giving it. Uh, I think that's absolutely Tom. I think to ask somebody say, you know, what is it you want to work on? What do you want feedback on and not just boulder in there and just presuming people want to help now because emotions are involved and you say the wrong thing to the wrong person at the right time. I can have a profound effect on them. People have said things to me in the past that I took with me for years. And only later on I might see them and they go, no, I didn't mean that. And it's like, so yeah, someone like me, I'm very affected by what other people say. I need time to truly absorb the feedback. So listen, clarify and digest before taking action. Um, relates to this. I've seen you receiving, give feedback many times and you're excellent about it. That's lovely to hear. Thank you. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and being a great teacher. Thanks Tom. Um, really fascinating stuff by Martin's circus skills workshop. Again, if you're just joining us, this is about the receiving feedback. Uh, quite a bit of what you're talking about. We've taken giving feedback did remind me of a book by Carl Rogers called active listening. One of the key tenants of the book is the need of the listener to reflect back and paraphrase what is being conveyed by the talker person giving the feedback. This helps to confirm understanding of what is being said by both parties. Really important as a, I don't do that much coaching anymore. Small business coaching, but business coaching is basically very similar to counseling, but it tends to be less heavy. So I mean, but it's, um, but the idea is that you, but then explaining something to you, well, one of the things and you understanding and explaining it back to them helps them to understand it more as well. So there's this lovely two way thing that goes on. And I think you're absolutely right. I think that to paraphrase back, to kind of stop, summarize, excuse me, summarize and, um, and, and clarify understanding is a really important thing and it makes people feel listened to as well. It's really powerful. If you really feel heard heard and really feel listened to a communication is so much stronger. Also, we talked about subjectivity and objectivity is weird that one can recognize a fabulous piece of music, magic, juggling, acting without knowing really anything about the subject subjectively. One can recognize quality, but surely quality can be assessed in an objective way. So where does subjectivity meet objectivity? It's a strange one, isn't it? There is, it's like music, right? Someone can be, I suppose, I always think of people like Joe Satriani and guitarists who I used to love, but because they were so good, I wouldn't say I sort of, other than the odd track didn't move me, but there's something about the skill that I loved and they were objectively good at what they did, but it didn't mean the music would move you. And I think there's too many things going on in the same way, a singer like Tom Waits could objectively not be a great singer when you compare it to what, you know, what being a good singer means, be able to hit high notes, having a full range, but there's something about his voice that moves me profoundly. So it's very difficult, isn't it? Of course, you know, and with magic, it's, you know, you can be skilled, but not be good at performing, great performing in our skill. What does it mean? And I think what it means is does it affect or move us in a way and, and make us want to watch and experience something, which again, is so subjective. Uh, uh, Randy, hi Steve. I'm currently restoring our cyclone, polishing parts of it. It's a moment. What a lovely mindful thing to do. Perfect time for listening to you. Here I am. Quick thought on the comment about one minute, uh, amount of seat seconds. My opinion is yes, it was done in a proper way, but in my opinion, I think that video was fine and I just think the world is in too much of a hurry. I did read that comment when you did the big picture and that was my fourth stand. Are you familiar with the saying stop and smell the roses? Absolutely. I believe we miss a lot in life because we're all in such a hurry. There's no two cents. Um, and I think you're right, Randy. And it's such a, it's almost like, um, I think with all these things, personal development, mindfulness, it's almost can be like cliche sometimes because we know the cliche so well, but do we actually do them? And that's stopping and be and choosing to be mindful whether it's with our practice. And I think it's so useful with our practice to actually stop and kind of stop it and, and, you know, do sit there and just shuffle and kind of look at the, the flow of what we're doing and enjoy it. It causes us to enjoy it. And if you've ever done that thing of walking down a road, you've walked down so many times, but stopping and looking up and seeing the tops of the buildings and the bits that you never would have seen before. Again, it's talked about a lot. Mindfulness is always almost like a buzzword now. Well it is, but what does it actually mean? And I think that the quality of life goes up if we just do stop and slow down. Um, but that doesn't mean the quality of life will go. If you slow down and listen to me more for some people that, you know, that's not good. Whatever you do, that's not going to be good. So, you know, it's, and it's that understanding, isn't it? That you're not going to appeal to all the people all the time. And I forget that sometimes I remember as a street performing common garden, you had to have a show that worked for everybody that all different ages and, and the older you get, the less important that becomes to me. You know, I see people on YouTube getting so many more views and I think, well, what could I do to get the views? But it's important that you don't lose that part of yourself, isn't it? And this isn't going to appeal to everyone. Uh, so, uh, unhanded by JP Valerino, some comments, uh, Rob Jacks, a big guy. I talked about the guy, the response of the guy in the video, who's great by the way. I think it's lovely, but in the trailer, the big guy has been in other demos as well. His reactions are so over the top that it makes you wonder. I love this review. Oh, thank you. Um, you know, sometimes less is more when it comes to tutorials and long videos, he just happens to love his own. So, um, you're bang on when you say that trick should be fun to do. If you're having fun, the spectator most likely would enjoy it too. Absolutely. You know, some of the, I'm obsessed at the moment with tricks that as a spectator you'd enjoy, but wouldn't completely floor you, you know, balls in the net. I've seen Johnny Thompson do that, the egg bag, Lincoln rings. I just got my pro pro like pro like Lincoln rings. Just love it. You know, and I'm sure that'll be when I perform them, that'll be, um, communicated to Gary. Uh, hi Steve. Just missed us going live shame. Um, had this few weeks now and can appreciate its value, but not familiarize myself enough to feel completely comfortable. But as you say, there's nothing really difficult about it. Is this the sort of thing I want to use? It's the sort of thing I want to use. Yeah. And it is, it's, it's fun. What I've noticed recently because I'm not performing as much is it's taken me a few more times than usual to get comfortable with the trick. So the trick I'm teaching in the live session tonight on the course is Harapan Ong's, um, perspective from optics. Like I said at the beginning, now it's not a difficult trick, but I had the handshakes the first few times I did it and it's just a weird thing. I'm not nervous. I don't know what it is, but, but I did it maybe for the fifth or sixth time today and they were gone. I just kind of knew what I was doing and it's a, it's a strange thing, isn't it? And I think that to feel completely comfortable with a trick, it just, even if it's an easy trick, you just, it's just that repetition of knowing the beats and knowing when you can relax and know when you can sit back and know when to focus, which I think takes me a good few times, a few more times than usual at the moment. Uh, Jackson's magic. Thanks for review. I recently filmed card to box, which was, Oh, the card to box. I spoke about the other routines that are on the download that I said I wasn't that keen on. And Jackson's magic said he was at the card to box. He really, really liked, and it is good. I love the card any number without taking the cards out of the box. See, I look down for now, but actually it could be the magician in me. Cause um, it's yeah, it's quite cool, isn't it? It's such a great gimmick. However, I feel for the price of card should have been included. Yeah, I know what you mean. Um, I've got loads of cards on my, on my shelf, but it didn't bother me that much, but I can imagine. Yeah. Uh, uh, make some X, not even close to a brand new method. And this is what they said at the beginning, brand new method, which I've, you know, you've got to know your stuff to claim Avenue. Uh, but for me it was, but I think anybody playing about with making gaps and gimmicks, which I haven't will think of, uh, of doing it. I know I did many years ago. I showed the one I made to Roy Walton. And he said he'd seen the same thing several times before. This is the problem with hype marketing. They make all these false claims in the home. Nobody can remember the last time, the exact same thing did the rounds before. Don't get me wrong. It's a fun method and we'll get great reactions. It's just not new. I agree. And I think that look, I mean, magic is so old, isn't it? The car magic, it just goes back so far that, uh, and the, the, you know, this method, yes, they might not have done it exactly the same or they might have. But like you said, if you're going to mess around with gas, I don't know much about loads of card gaps and stuff. So I'm not an expert in it. You know, what I try and look at is it's the effect good. And I think it's, you know, people that are in the know more than me and I'm trying to study and learn more. Um, sorry, like me, more than me, like Mexi is good to listen to. So it's, um, it's enlightening. Thank you. I tune is that to send them back from Michael Peterson. Sorry about that, Michael. Um, I'm never, yeah. Um, tarot tie unlimited, endless. This is what they're saying. Endless applications. I endless, this is a typical and logical statements made about any magical object article that remains as vast as the universe. Uh, this kind of hype cannot be justified. Every trick has particular limitations. Just stick to the three or four applications, uh, that are most likely to be utilized frustrating or a review, but you shine. See, that's lovely of you. Um, so there you go. So, uh, yeah, I think that I, I quite, I find it quite funny, you know, when people go over the top of their height and we all know now, don't we, that it's, uh, but yeah, I'm unlimited and you kind of go, well, you know, I'll tell you what has got unlimited, uh, uses a deck of cards, you know, so much. So more than any gimmick, I think. Uh, right. So I'm going to go to your comments here now. Oh, by the way, I'm going to interview Joshua J tomorrow. Uh, not live. So if you've got any questions, don't put them on here cause this will disappear afterwards. But if you, I'm not saying I can get to them. I'm not got that long with him, but, um, if you've got anything you want me to ask him, put it in the comments after this below this video. Uh, so I was up in the loft today digging through some old magic stuff for my dad. How lovely. Found a nice cup and ball set in the bag. So I'm going to give it a go. Dude, it's great. It's a wonderful routine. Uh, magic man, Pete. I've learned the one handed top palm through Steve's online magic course. I haven't pre-read this by the way. I love the move in the natural motion of handing the deck, you palm the card. Absolutely. Giving criticism, nice and appreciated. Being a A-hole, not good or valuable. Absolutely Ezekiel. And yeah, it's all about how we say things, isn't it? Um, wouldn't mind talking about an effect on practicing using the one handed top palm during the live. Absolutely. Go for it. We'll talk about that. Uh, it's a great book. I've only learnt of it as I had to interpret it for counselling course. Learned a lot from it. Is that, was I talking about the Paranal? Or is that a different one? Or is that the one I mentioned, the active listening one? Um, my magic is equivalent of Tom Waits voice, but not as polished. I'm going, that's great. Oh, nearly banned you Baxton. Then the band button's right next to the thing. Hey Steve, thanks for the help on the Omeg account the other day. I want to make a live one day. Yeah, yeah, no worries. Um, uh, Michael sent me where, uh, he was reading about the Omeg account and I sent him a little video. Active listening. Yeah, it's a good book. I haven't read it. I've heard a lot about it though. Right. About half an hour and then my live session. So a couple of things to say, Josh and Jay questions put below this afterwards, not on this bit, not on there'll be, um, and if there's any, like I said, I haven't got loads of time with him, but I'm really, really looking forward to it. Um, there are a couple of courses under this, a free introduction to card magic course, not just for complete beginners. There's three decent tricks on there. Um, but if you want to give that someone send them the link, that'd be great. And the spread cold course is down there as well for those with more advanced. Um, and do check out all the, uh, my Instagram account, which is at SF for Steve Faulkner online magic. Right. And do like and subscribe, go and check out online magic.co. Thank you so much for coming. Uh, I'm gonna go and rest my voice now for half an hour before we go on the other thing and take care. See you later. Bye.