44.第22集 下

Wow! Stop saying that. You know, you read about it, you see it in the movies, even when you practice it at home. Man, oh man, it is nothing like that. Listen, listen. You told me something that was really difficult for you. And, well, I figure if you can be honest, then I can too. Oh God, don't tell me, I did it wrong. No, no, no. Nothing wrong about that. Oh. Um, okay, here goes. I'm not 22. I'm 25. And 13 months. Huh. But I figure, you know, that shouldn't change anything. I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are? Uh, listen, um. As long as we're telling stuff, uh. I have another one for you. I'm a little younger than I said. You're not a senior? Oh, I'm a senior. In high school. Okay. What we did was wrong. Oh God, I just had sex with someone who wasn't alive during the bicentennial. I just had sex. Ethan, focus. How could you not tell me? Well, you never told me how old you were. Well, that's different. My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states. What were you thinking? I wasn't thinking. I was too busy falling. Don't say it. In love with you. Really? Sorry. Well, fall out of it. You know, you shouldn't even be here. It's a school night. Oh God, oh God. I'm like those women that you see with shiny guys named Chad. I'm Joan Collins. Who? Andre should be there in about 45 minutes. All righty, bye bye. It's just easier that way. Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream. No, forget it. Well, why not? Was I doing something particularly saucy? All right, fine. Well, you were not the only one there. Joey was there too. All right. Was there anybody else there? No. You sure? Nobody handing out mints or anything? No, it was just the three of us. Oh. Tell me, was it like you and Chandler and then you and me, or you and me and Chandler? You know what? What? There were times when it wasn't even me. That is so sweet, you guys. Hey, Mom. Mom, Ethan called again. Mom. Mom! What? Ethan called again. Oh. Are you not seeing him anymore? No. You know, sometimes just things don't work out. And this has nothing to do with the fact that he needs a note to get out of gym? I didn't say anything. I did not say anything, I swear. He stopped by. Listen, next time you talk to him, could you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is? Oh, my life is just so amusing. Can we drop it now? Sorry. It's morphin' time! Stegosaurus! Tyrannosaurus! Oh, I got to go. Whoa, head rush. Oh, one more, and then I have to go. Cool. Where are you going? I got a birthday party with some work people. Work people? Nobody told me. No, I know, that's part of the whole, you know, them not liking you extravaganza. No, I don't get this. A month ago, these people were my friends. You know, I mean, just because I'm in charge doesn't mean I'm a different person. Well, then you should come tonight. You know, just hang out with them. Let them see what a great guy you still are. You think I should? I really do, yeah. Okay. Oh, but, um, can we not go together? I don't want to be the geek who invited the boss, you know? And I think last night was great. You know, the karaoke thing? Tracy and I doing Ebony and Ivory? You were great! But they still made fun of you. What? You know, now you're more like, you know, Mr. Caring Boss. Mr., you know, I'm one of you, Boss. Mr., I want to be your buddy, Boss Man Bing. Then I don't get it. Well, you know what, Chandler? I think you've just got to face it. You're like the guy in the big office, you know? You're the one that hires them and fires them. They still say you're a great boss. They do? Uh-huh. But they're not your friends anymore. But I just want to... No, but you can't. But I just want... Aren't you good? Oh, Carol and I have a new system. If she punches in 9-1-1, it means she's having a baby. Otherwise, I just... I just ignore it. What about Andre? Oh, well, this morning, he got a call from what I think was our cousin Nathan, and frankly, there's a little more than I needed to know. Hey. That was gonna be my opener. Hey! Did you guys check out those new hand dryers in the bathroom? I thought that was just a rumor. Yes, sir. All right, look. I got to tell you something. I'm not 17. I only said that so you'd think I was cute and vulnerable. I'm actually 30. I have a wife. I have a job. I'm your congressman. Monica, this is ridiculous. We are great together. We can talk, we make each other laugh, and the sex... Oh, man, okay. I have no frame of reference, but I thought that was great. It was. Then what's the problem? Ethan, it's, um... It's icky. Icky? You're actually gonna throw this away because it's icky? This isn't easy for me either. I wish things were different. I... If you were a few years older or I was a few years younger or... We lived in biblical times. I could really... No, don't say it. Love you. Are your hands still wet? They're moist. Yeah, right? Let's dry them again. Could these margaritas be any stronger? Hey, Chandler. Hello, Mr. Bing. Loved your Stevie Wonder last night. Thanks. Listen, about the weekly numbers, I'm gonna need them on my desk by 9 o'clock. You sure? No problem. You have to give me something, you know? Okay, now that was Gerstin Santos, and, uh, who's the guy with the mustache? Petrie. Right, right. Okay, well, some people are gonna be working this weekend. Oh! Ross! Ross? I'm here. You are? We were... Just... Wow. What? Great, now I'm having a baby. What? Oh! No, I'm having... I'm having a baby! I'm having a... The phone! Ross? I'm hurt. Hey, Ross, look what I got going here. Yeah, save it for the cab, okay? What are you doing? We're going to a hospital. What, so I can't look nice? There might be doctors there. Joey, get out of the fridge. All right, all right. What is that? For the ride. Oh, yeah, like in a cab. Save it! Okay, hating this. Monica, come on, now. Let's go. Baby coming. God, I can't believe it. I'm gonna have my nephew. That's nice. Get out. Let's go. Come on. Here we go. Rossy, Rossy.