Thằng Vô Duyên - Bảo Chung ( Bản Gốc ) | Hài Kịch Xưa Hay Nhất

I'm sorry, but I have to go now. My name is Moc. Moc? What? It suits you. How old are you this year? I'm 24. 24? I don't think you're 24. I'm younger, right? You look so old. You're so rude. You look so old. I'm serious. You look so old. I'm old because I'm a farmer. I'm 24. You look like 40. Oh my God. Do you have a husband? You're so weird. I'm so young. You're not young. You're old enough to get married. I know. You must have a lot of debts. You're so rude. I don't owe anyone. I'm not from a poor family. Don't lie to me. You don't owe anyone. Why don't you have a husband? Because I don't want to. You don't want to? You're old enough to get married. You must be single. I'm sorry. I don't dare to be single. Look at me. I'm not single. You look like a ghost. I look like a ghost. You look like a ghost. You're so rude. I'm not rude. I'm talking to you politely. Why do you say bad things about me? Oh my God. You don't say bad things about me. How can I say bad things about you? Oh my God. You look like a ghost. How can I say bad things about you? Have you seen a ghost? No. How do you know that? I heard people say that. I don't know. I'm sorry. Oh my God. You don't look like a ghost. I don't care. I don't need your compliments. I don't care. Why are you laughing? I'm scared when you laugh. I want to tell you something. What? I have something to tell you. What is it? Tell me. I have a big house. But no one wants to move in. If you don't want to move in, move in with me. I don't dare. Let me go. You are so rude. Let me go. What are you doing? Are you scolding me? Oh my God. I met her in the middle of the street. I know you live nearby. I asked her name. I wanted to say hello to her. But she scolded me. I don't dare. Let me tell you. You are a beautiful girl. When you go out, people will tease you. I asked her name. I asked her age. Why did you scold her? She is a good girl. Why is everyone scolding me? Oh my God. I want to confess my love to you. But you don't listen to me. We are not meant to be. I'm so sad. You are so beautiful. What happened? Why is everyone pulling each other? Maybe it's a house fire. We have to follow them. Thank you for teaching me. I'm so happy. Sit down. Where should I sit? You are a special guest. You have to sit on the special table. Come here. Follow me. Here. This is a special table for you. I sit here? Yes. This is for you. Eat it. Drink it. People always say you can't go home if you are drunk. You can do what you want. You can eat and drink here. Eat and drink. Eat it. Yes. Your lips are so thin. Wait. I'm sorry. Stop talking. Let me ask you something. Everyone Among all of you here, who is the one who bought the newspaper for the dead and the most unlucky guy in the neighborhood to know that my house is having a New Year's party today and come here? Who? Who? Speak up! Why are you shouting so loudly? It's nothing. I'm just talking nonsense. I'm talking about history. You're talking about history? Yes, the weather. The weather? Is there going to be a storm? Nonsense! There won't be a storm. The storm number 5 is gone. It won't come back. Come on, just eat and drink. Eat and drink until you're full. Don't talk anymore. I'm not as happy sitting down as I am up here. But there's no more space up here. Do you want to come down and sit down? There's no need to sit down, Mr. Nam. There's no need. Sit down and eat. Don't talk nonsense. I know. Come on in. This chicken salad is so good. I'm old. I don't eat chicken salad. I eat this shrimp. Mr. Nam, please try this curry. I remember that the shrimp is so good, right? I like the roasted duck. I'm so happy. This house is so beautiful. Yes. Mr. Nam. Eat. Don't talk nonsense. Let me praise this house. Why are you so mean? Let him say what he wants to say. He shouldn't open his mouth. This house is so beautiful, Mr. Nam. Yes. Why do you have so many houses, Mr. Nam? You must be one of the dozens of people who ask me. I have 10 houses. 10 houses? What kind of house has 10 houses? 5 houses is a lot. 5 houses is not enough. If it's not enough, let's live in a house like before. We don't have to build a big house to save money. What are you talking about? No one wants to stay at home all his life. We have to live well. What do you think, Mr. Tu? What do you think is good about this house, Mr. Tu? What is good? What is good about this house? The house is cheap. If there is a fire, we can save money. If there is a fire in such a big house, 10 of your gold will be gone. Why are you hitting me? Give it back to me. Let me go. I didn't eat. Let me go. I didn't eat. Please calm down. I invited you here so I could eat your skin. I'm not full yet. If you're not full, then get out of my house. Let me go. Where are your parents? Help me. You broke my bones. I'll kill you. You broke my bones. How can I open the door? Be careful. I can't open it now. If you don't dare to open the door, how can I open the box? How can I open it? You mean the coffin? Yes, the coffin. Don't you dare to open it. You're so bad. You're so evil. Please, everyone. Take him away. Get out of my house. Oh my God. Why is my life so miserable? I don't know why people treat me so badly. I'm so miserable. Oh my God. Stop complaining. I told you many times but you didn't listen to me. You're a grown man. You don't have to worry about your job or your body. You should worry about your mother. You've been eating bad food all day. It's good for your body. Oh my God. I don't eat bad food. Why do you scold me? It's all because of my mother. Why? She gave birth to me. She let other people catch me. Why did she catch me? I ate bad food. They hit me and scolded me. Shut up. Don't say that. Look at you. You're so unlucky. I'm telling the truth. I'm so lucky. But you're so unlucky. Oh my God. I gave birth to you but you're not like me. You're like a neighbor. Are you crazy? That's right. You're so lucky. You're my daughter but you're like a neighbor. You must be like a neighbor to give birth to me. Stop. Oh my God. Are you talking to me like that? What do you mean? Are you talking to me like that? That's right. You're like a neighbor. Shut up. It's almost the year 2000. Talk to me politely. Don't be so rude. What about the year 2000? The year 2000, the earth will explode. You'll die. I think in the year 2000, only my mother gave birth to me. Nonsense. Oh my God. What are you talking about? Get out of my house. Nonsense. Who's looking for me? Let me out. Get ready. Why are you so happy? We're here to give you a gift. A gift? Yes, a gift for you. What? Yes. Oh my God. Is it true? It's true. Thank you so much. Why are you so nice to my family? It's nothing. We want to enjoy the Tet holiday. That's right. What do you mean? It's nothing. We want you to help us from the 1st to the 3rd Tet holiday. Please help us. Don't let him go out. Yes. We're afraid of him. What? How can I keep my son? We have a way. What is it? Let me tell you. What? That's it. I understand. But in my hometown, we have to return the cake. You've given me so many gifts. If I don't give you anything, I'm so shy. It's nothing. As long as you help us, he can sleep for 3 days. Don't worry. According to your plan, I'm sure he can sleep for 5 days. Thank you so much. I know my son. He's a good boy. On behalf of my family, I'd like to say sorry to you. Please forgive us. It's the end of Tet holiday. I wish you a good spring. What spring? Just say it. I wish you a good spring. What? I wish you a good spring. Is she your daughter? You're so rude. Don't come to my house. Let's go home. You're so rude. Let's go home. Am I rude? Why did they yell at you? I don't know. I wish them a good spring. You know what? I wish them good luck. Where are you going, grandpa? I'm going out. I'm going to visit you. Visit me? Yes. Alright. You can visit me if you want. But don't say anything. Don't say anything. I can't say anything? Yes. Promise me that you'll let me in. Or I'll close the door. I promise. Promise? You have to keep your promise. Yes. Let me in. Why am I so nervous? My mouth is itching. What? Stop right there. How dare you come into my house? You can't say anything. Alright. You can say anything. I won't listen to you. Alright. You can say anything. Sit down. What? You want to drink tea? Alright. I have tea. Drink it. It's good. Drink it. I'll make you another one. Mr. Tu. Drink tea. That's all? I'll make you another one. He's so weird. He didn't let me say anything. Hey. What are you doing? I told you. I said... You can't say anything. You can only drink tea. Mr. Tu. Please. Just one sentence. Just one sentence? Alright. I'll let you say it. Just one sentence. Besides making tea for customers, besides making tea for customers, you have to let me say five sentences. It's not fun at all. For example, say thank you. Or ask me how I'm doing. Ask me if I'm sick. So I can help you. I have a lot of good medicines. Tell me the truth. Don't hide it from me. Alright. Thank you. You care about me. My health is still good. I'm not sick. Don't worry. Drink tea. That's enough. Drink tea. I have a lot to say. What do you want to say? Stop it. Don't say it. Every time I hear you say it, I'm so scared. What are you afraid of? I'm afraid your words are rude. No, they're not. They're not rude. Don't worry. I'm very polite. I'm not rude. You're polite, right? Are you sure? If you're sure, say it. If you're not sure, don't say it. I'm sure you'll believe me. Alright, I believe you. I allow you to say it. Say it. Mr. Tu. You're so handsome. What are you talking about? You're so weird. You look like me. Of course. You look like me. I'm your son? No, you're not. You're not. You just complimented me. Now you're talking bad about me. You're so unlucky. Look at me. I'm only 3 or 4 years old. You're my grandson. Really? You're my grandson. Don't lie to me. You're my grandson. I'm your grandson. You're lying. I'm old. Old people don't know how to find a wife? There are many old people in this world. They're not as lucky as you. Don't be so unlucky. Stop it. You're so rude. You want to talk bad about me? No, I'm just joking. Shut up. In order to talk, I should use my mind better. I should think carefully if my speech is right. I'll start to talk. But before I start to talk, I have to think a lot to decide which words to say. I'm not arrogant like you. Do you the meaning I asked? Do you get it? akat Speak properly, son. Uncle Tu. What else? I understand what you said. I was going to say nothing, but I was afraid you wouldn't understand. I would like to speak properly. If you allow me, I will swallow my tongue 7 times before I speak. I promise I won't do what you want. Is that right? Yes. Alright. You come to visit me. I allow you to speak. But you only speak about me. You don't have the right to speak about my grandchildren or others. Do you understand? Yes. Say what you want to say. What are you doing? Swallowing my tongue. Only 4 times. I will swallow 3 more times. Can you speak now? Say it. Swallow 7 times? Yes. Uncle Tu. How old are you this year? How old do you think I am this year? 50? Incorrect. 40? Incorrect. 20? Oh my god. I'm not 20 years old. I'm 20 years old because I'm your friend, not your uncle. How old are you this year? Why do you keep guessing? 80. What? I'm 80 years old. Oh my god. 80 years old. Your body is still strong and healthy. Do you think I'm fat? Fat. I exercise regularly. I exercise every morning. Really? To keep healthy. That's why I'm like this. Really? I'm trying to live up to 100 years old. Like my grandfather in the past. Do you want to be a devil? Why do you live so long? Oh my god. Why do you keep asking me? Hey. I treat you so well. You came to my house. I invited you to drink tea. Very polite. Why do you treat me like a devil? You promised me to be polite. I love you. I let you say it. But every time, you keep talking nonsense. From now on, you can only hide it. You can't say it. I'm afraid of your words. Oh my god. You're so naughty. I'm going to beat you up. Drink tea. What do you want? I don't understand what you want. Oh my god. You're so miserable. Say it. What do you want? Mr. Tu. Please open your mouth. What? Do you want to see my teeth? Do you want to be a dentist? Okay. I'll show you. Here. Wow. Your teeth are so good. There's nothing deep. No way. I always keep my teeth clean. How can I show you? It's simple. Simple as simple. Just brush your teeth regularly. Brush your teeth in the morning. See? Brush your teeth at noon. Brush your teeth before going to bed. Brush your teeth after drinking tea. Brush your teeth after eating cake. In short, brush your teeth at night. Do you see? In this neighborhood, people my age eat porridge. But I chew everything. I chew sugarcane, guava. I can chew anything. Your teeth are so good. So good. Your teeth are not as good as mine. That's right. You know what? I heard from old people that people my age have good teeth. Besides chewing rice, sugarcane, guava, they also chew their children. So I can't chew sugarcane, guava, guava all my life. Oh my God. You're so evil. You're so unlucky. Why do you keep scolding me? Get out of my house. Now. Get out. What's wrong with you? I said it's not true. Why are you so angry? I heard what old people said. I just said it. Let me sit and play for a while. No. I don't want to see you anymore. Get out of my house now. Now. Don't. Let me try. Don't. I'll fall. It hurts. Oh my God. It's your fault, not mine. It's my fault. Do you have any red medicine? No. Get out. Do whatever you want. Stay in my house. I don't want to hear you anymore. Now. Get out. I didn't say anything wrong. If you don't believe me, ask the old man. I didn't say anything. You're so difficult. Everything is broken. Oh, I forgot. Mr. Tan. Open the door. I want to say something. What are you doing? Are you destroying my house? Mr. Tan. Are you destroying my house? You destroyed my house. He has been cursing and cursing me. I don't like it. I don't want to destroy the house. This guy. I didn't do anything. I didn't destroy the house. I opened the door. Because everyone said I was rude. I want to tell Mr. Tan that I'm not rude. I say one last sentence. Then I go home and sleep. You shut up right away. You don't say anything. Shut up right away. Mr. Tan. Let him say one sentence. Let him go home. I didn't say I couldn't sleep. I can't sleep at home. Say it. You say it properly. You say it wrong. Your mouth is full of salt. Oh my God. What did I say wrong? Can I apologize to Mr. Tan? Yes. But I have talked to Mr. Tu. A lot. But I didn't say anything to Mr. Tu's grandchild. Right? Yes. I will go home later. If he catches a cold, he will die. Don't blame me. I'm angry with you. You dare to hit my grandchild? Hit him in the face. Hit him. Let him go. Hit him.