If You're Sick & Tired Of Being Sick & Tired | WATCH THIS | - Ed Mylett

I had a really good friend of mine. I went to lunch and he said, I don't know who this guy is here In front of me and he goes let me ask you a question. Honestly right now. What are you grateful for? And at the lunch I said Jack shit nothing brother. There's nothing good in my life right now And i'm not exaggerating this to you when I tell you this and this is a factual story as i'm mouthing these words Two people walked in with an older man Both of them clearly were fighting cancer somehow both had lost their hair One of the ladies had a bonnet on and they were barely moving in Both walked by our table and gave me the most warm greeting the warmest smile as a stranger And he goes that's pretty freaking pathetic. You can't find anything in your life to be grateful for right now And on the drive home i'm not kidding you I started to stack gratitude I started to take inventory because if you can find things to be grateful for in that space Man is your life going to be rich when there really are external things to be grateful for So my first mechanism out of that space Was honestly to stack the things I was grateful for and I started reinforcing it over and over and over again And what happens is there's this reticular activating system in our brains, right? And all of a sudden because that's the messaging I was giving myself All of a sudden all these things start to come into my awareness that i'm grateful for I start to magnetize to myself some people that I needed to find into my life and that was the next layer I started to see things to be grateful for my health my fitness people who loved me and what it is It changed my state when I stacked gratitude I changed what I did in the morning and I changed what I did in the evening And so somehow by grabbing control of my morning and by grabbing control of my evening I got some measure of control over the middle of my day I was an out of control person back in those days meaning this I woke up worried stressed fearful and I Immediately start thinking about a bill. I had to pay something that was wrong and i'm in a state of reaction to begin Every i'm talking within six minutes of waking up six seconds. Most people listening to this. That's what they do I said I got to grab control of my morning and I set up routines in my morning Maybe they served me maybe they didn't but they were things I could deliver on doing for myself That which you do not hate you will eventually tolerate and I think that identifies most people's lives in other words, they Average becomes sort of like this slow asphyxiation It's almost like an anesthetic and that over time would become kind of immune and dulled to the average that we're becoming I know this is true at least for me. You probably experience it yourself, too And so over time we sort of minimize where we're at In other words, i'm a little pudgy instead of being no you're fat ass, right? You don't magnify the degree to which the pain ought to be affecting you And so really what he means in that is listen, you're going to get out of your life what you'll accept that's really difficult for people I think to understand is look what you think you're worth and what you're going to tolerate is absolutely what you're going to bring into your life and what the outward part of your life is going to look like and so I live by that like I let myself sort of feel the pain and the difficulty of of Being not where I want to be in whatever that area is whether it's my spirituality my relationships my money I let myself feel that pain because as you know, there's two motivators, right? There's the gaining of pleasure right wanting to go get something chasing the dream, but then there's the avoidance of pain And for a lot of champions, that's a pretty big driving force for them And so at least for me I I leverage both of those things on me to get myself to take action This thing people think that like i'll be happy when? Once I get like this big amazing home or once I get this car or once I get this Relationship or an amount of money then i'll allow myself some happiness The problem is the finish line always moves you never arrive there, right? The other part is people think well if I enjoy myself now I'm gonna lose my drive In other words if I can just wire myself with enough pain all the time I won't lose my driver ambition. The truth is there's no correlation between the two at all There's no relationship between you feeling complete pain all the time and losing drive and so I talk about living in a state of blissful dissatisfaction and Really the best example of that would be like if you've ever I love a good meal, right? You know if I bought into a great piece of steak if you're a steak eater like I am you take that first bite It's like complete bliss, right? There's no correlation between how great that tasted and your lack of desire for the next bite. In fact That bliss causes you to want more of it And so the more we can be able to reward ourselves with bliss, we're not going to lose our dissatisfaction We're not going to we're not going to lose that and so for me our brains There's dopamine hit you get when you do something successful if you constantly cheat yourself out of that hit right biomechanically in your body Less and less in the future where you want to achieve the next level the next dream the next step And that's why so many people stall out in life They didn't they got to a certain point and they cheated themselves out of the bliss out of the celebration It's important that we celebrate our wins. We celebrate our lives because it causes us to want the next bite It keeps us hungrier not the reverse And so for me, I want to live in a state of being grateful and blissful now not waiting for some future place or date That may never arise self-confidence is really self-trust So the first thing is the people I know that are really happy are very self-aware In fact, the best entrepreneurs I know are very self-aware. They're aware of their shortcomings, right? They want to improve them. They want to get to the next version of themselves all the time And so for me self-confidence comes because I didn't have it And I think anytime you meet somebody like yourself or myself who might now appear self-confident It's because I really had to find tools and resources because I was so insecure and shy and introverted So I had to find techniques and resources to build that up in me and for me, it's very simple It's the promises that I keep to myself If I have a habit over and over beginning to stack one on top of the other of keeping promises I make to me not other people In other words the minute you begin to get external in your life worrying about what other people think about you, right? You've you've lost all control you and it never fills you up and people's admiration people's gratitude towards you Will never fill you up. It's your own. It's your own inside And so for me self-confidence comes from keeping the promises I make to myself and the other part of it is being aware I'm doing it. In other words, most people don't give themselves enough credit all the time They're very aware of these 20 percent things and not aware of the 80, right? And that's why the dosage is so important too. You've nailed it. It should be 80 20 right because people get addicted to this. I'm not good at this. Uh, people don't like this about me I don't feel good instead of focusing on the 80 and stacking up. Wow I did eat what I said I was going to today I did get up when I said I was going to I made the amount of phone calls I treated people in such a way. I promised myself. It's not just doing those things. It's rewarding It's being aware of it and stacking that up when I work with athletes The successful athletes I work with when they're in a slump It's never that they can't hit a ball anymore or make a shot or swing a golf club They've lost their self-confidence somewhere along the way They've lost the ability to focus on the things they are great at and stacking those promises They make to themselves and the way I get them to break their slump is not correcting their swing or getting them positive It's getting them to acknowledge the small promises showing up to batting practice early hitting that extra bucket of balls Beginning to reward themselves for the extra promises They keep to themselves puts them back in a state of self-confidence. All of a sudden they're hitting the ball great again