It Took Me 50 Years and Losing Almost Everything To Realize What I'll Tell You In 10 Minutes

What if the things that you're chasing, success, achievement, the perfect person, perfect job, the perfect location, aren't really going to bring you joy, aren't really what life is about? My name is Heidi and in this video I want to share with you what I've learned in 50 years and losing almost everything to chronic illness. I used to think that living was doing, doing, doing and from the moment I got out of bed in the morning till the moment I fell into bed for years, years and years, I was in constant motion. I didn't have time to slow down, to contemplate life, to think am I living my story or am I living someone else's story or society's story and then I got sick, really sick over 10 years and lost almost everything. I lost my career, I lost all the achievements that I had strived so hard to achieve and I couldn't drive, I was in bed most of the time and when all those labels are stripped from you, who are you? It was a really dark time for me and it led me on a journey of self-discovery that has been the most unexpected and amazing thing in my life. So I want to share with you some things that I've learned through this journey. Number one, if your body or your mind is telling you to slow down, listen. There were so many, so many opportunities for me to slow down before I got completely leveled but I didn't listen and I kept going and that's when it took a massive toll. I believe that you pay, you will pay for what you're living, how you're living. Second is instead of thinking about what's next, think about what's now. I was three steps ahead of where the present moment was when I was running, running, running and what this has taught me, this whole experience has taught me is to be in the now because when I'm two events or three events or three steps ahead, I'm not living in the now and also that is where anxiety is, that's where fear is but in the now it's not because so much of my illness and I had anxiety about getting worse and what every symptom meant and all of that was in the future which hasn't happened and right now, yes, there's discomfort, there's also a lot of other things there too. So live for now, be all in for now. Instead of looking at what you don't have, which is exactly the way that we culturally are conditioned, right, to look at what we don't have so we can strive to get that and that's gonna bring us X, Y and Z but it isn't true. Look at what you have now, what you have in this moment. I took so much for granted. When I lost it, I thought, wow, I should have been more grateful in the moment and now I am grateful for so much. I have a really close friend who's 90, maybe you've seen some of our videos with Marvin and he lives in assisted living and he tells me about the people with Parkinson's who are just getting a meal or a fork to their mouth. It's so huge and it's exhausting and it's so hard. When's the last time you thought about eating, being present for a meal and thinking about the gift of being able to pick up food with your fork and bring it to your mouth with ease? You don't think about what we have until it's gone but have gratitude. Look at the abundance that we all have no matter what your situation is. I couldn't see anything but my illnesses, they were so consuming. I didn't realize that I had so much to be grateful for all around me until I started to kind of go through this journey. I had a roof over my head. I had healthy food. I had a wonderful cozy bed and a partner who cares and a dog who's amazing. There's a lot but you got to slow down to realize it. To look around, to look inside and see what's there. Don't wait until it's the right time or the right job or the right partner, the right situation. Do the thing now. If you get that stirring inside of you, listen to it. It's there for a reason. I thought I had to wait until I was healthy to experience joy and the reality is I'm healthier but I may never be rid of all the things that I'm dealing with. That doesn't mean I can't enjoy life now. I can't get out now. I can't move. I can't do things. I can. So often we wait for the perfect whatever to do the thing and then it passes us by and that becomes a habit and we keep waiting. We let that one go. We let that one go. We contemplate. We overthink. We overanalyze. We get analysis paralysis. Make listening to that feeling, that sensation, that stirring and acting upon it. Make that the habit. That's what life is about. You're gonna experience so much more. Your time and attention are your two most valuable resources. Use them wisely. Everything is vying for our attention these days. Wow, it is crazy but that's our currency. That's our resource. What we pay attention to determines how we feel. We think about what we believe and how we make choices. Do the things that you're paying attention to and you're investing your time in make you feel better about life and about yourself and about possibilities or do they make you feel worse or do they move you further away from where you want to go. Remember your attention and your time is valuable. I spent so much time worrying and being consumed by all the negative things that it was hard for me to see a positive path forward but when I started directing my attention toward healing, toward the things that build me up and away from the things that trigger me or make me feel less than, it's pretty amazing. Be brave. Step outside your comfort zone. I do in some areas in my life and other areas have been more difficult but I have pushed myself so far out of my comfort zone. Like doing a video like this would not have been the old me but I feel so passionate about what I want to share with the world and what I've learned because it's changed my life in so many amazing ways and if I can feel this way, everybody else can feel this way and I think it's what the world needs right now, this connection. It doesn't have to be a big thing, just a nudge, just a little challenge and it makes you feel so good about yourself when you do it. Just the effort, just the act. Don't worry about the outcome, it's just the effort. For the people in your life that you appreciate, tell them. Tell them you appreciate them and what you appreciate about them. It makes them feel really good and it makes you feel really good and the more the better. And last, I'm gonna close with you are enough and you were born enough and I didn't feel that for my first 50 years and let me tell you the truth. Just saying it, okay I'm enough now, after 50 years of believing otherwise, it doesn't stick, it doesn't feel authentic. The way to feel enough is to be kind to yourself, to give yourself compassion every single day and to believe in yourself, to accept all of you and to keep feeding that enoughness every day. It's like a living organism where you have to nurture and cultivate it and pull the weeds of negative thinking and your internal critic where you think, okay I may be a little bit different than everybody else. That's okay. I love that. I want to be different. I don't want to be the herd. I want to be me and I believe in me. So do something kind for yourself every single day and while you're at it, do something kind for someone else. I hope these have been helpful for you. They've changed my life in every way and my relationships. Thanks so much for watching. I'll see you in the next video. Have a great day.