How I Manage My Time as a Busy Homeschool Mom of 10

Do you struggle to get it all done as a homeschool mom to manage your time well? I can relate. Hi, my name is Sherry. This is Our Life Homeschooling. It's a YouTube channel where I like to encourage other moms in homeschooling. I'm a Christian mom married to my high school sweetheart Nelson. We've been married for 25 years. Together, we have 10 children, ages 20 down to 2 and a half. Our oldest is graduated, one graduate. We have seven in school and two preschoolers. We have another son graduating this year. So, it's just a very full and busy house. I've had a few people ask me how I manage my time, and I thought it would be helpful to do a video just sharing with you some of the tips that have helped me, some of the lessons I've learned along the way. A few days ago, our youngest son was sick and it was a co-op day. And so I ended up sending my older kids to co-op and staying home with my youngest three. And this is just something really unusual for me. I'm not used to being home with my little kids um with all the big kids gone. And it really took me back to some of those early days of being home with all young kids. And there were a couple things that I noticed that were different. Uh, the one was it took me forever to get the kitchen cleaned up. I have a lot of older kids and when we do chores, they can get the kitchen cleaned up so so quickly. It's wonderful. It's night and day. So, it took me a while to get the kitchen cleaned up, but then after it was clean, we had a lot of free time. We had space. And I was almost like trying to figure out maybe we should do something. Maybe I should plan something. I'm not used to having this much time in our day, but there were fewer kids at home. Now, later in the day, all my kids back home came back home after we'd had this quiet morning by ourselves and there were other challenges. Now, the older kids came back and it's like you're shifted back into the world you're used to being into. And older kids come with a lot more stuff. the more kids you have, the more things you know they accumulate papers and projects and backpacks, everything, water bottles. And so, on the one hand, when I had all younger kids, there were things that were harder, like doing the dishes and getting just some of the basic things done, but there were less of them, and that was a lot easier. The work you have in your home is proportional to the number of people you have living there. So, while it seemed like a lot of work when I had fewer kids, it wasn't nearly as much work as I have now, but I was doing all of it. Now, we have so much more going on in the house, so many more people living here, but have a lot more helpers and people that are willing to chip in, and it just makes such a big difference. One example of this is uh these days I never know how many people to expect for dinner. I might be feeding my family of 12 for the third time that day when I make dinner. Or there may only be half of them here because some of them are out at volleyball practice or working or running out with friends. Or I might be making dinner for my 12 the 12 people in my family plus a few of their friends. So that's one way that it's just totally changed from when we had younger children. But the work that you have is proportional to the amount of help that you have. One of the lessons I learned early in my mothering was the importance of delegating. There were certain jobs that I started realizing I could be doing this all day long. I could keep going from this job to the next one. I could get up, put the dishes away, start the laundry, make breakfast, clean up from breakfast, and then do a little bit of something else. And then before you know it, it's time to start making lunch. Then clean up from lunch. And then get the laundry out, switch the laundry, fold the laundry. These are jobs that I like to think of as hamster wheel jobs. They're they're important. They are important, but they are always there. They will always need constant help. Someone always needs to do them. And I've learned to delegate those kinds of jobs so that I can make progress in other areas. So, for example, a couple of the things that I've delegated is one of them is laundry. As soon as our kids are about 10 years old, they start doing their own laundry. Typically, I will run a load of laundry or two a day, but all my kids who are 10 and older are doing their own laundry. And this has been so helpful because it just minimizes how much I have to do. We also have someone that is responsible to be the kitchen person for the day and then a second person who's the kitchen helper. So when I make a meal, I am not having to make all that meal and then feed the kids and then clean up. I make the meal and someone is always assigned to clean it up. It's not something that's on my plate. It's not something I'm thinking about. It's just already handed out to someone else. We've delegated a couple other things. I have some kids that really like to cook and bake. Our one daughter uh loves to bake all the time. So, she is usually making cakes, cookies, desserts. Anytime we have a potluck, one of our girls always wants to make something for it. So, that is just it's so nice when your kids like to help in that way. The other night, my daughter asked if she could make dinner. And I am never going to turn that down. Anytime someone offers to make dinner for me, it's a yes. and I don't care what you make, I will eat it. So delegating helps in so many ways. It just frees up your time. When it comes to grocery shopping, my husband enjoys shopping, shopping in general, and he is happy to do the grocery shopping. I don't like doing the grocery shopping. So, it's just one thing that we've worked between us. I'm happy for him to go do that. And that's when he will often give me time by myself, which is really nice. If you start feeling bitter in your spirit because you are doing so much work and people are sitting around and waiting, they have nothing to do. They're just waiting till mom's done so we can get on to the next fun thing. This is a time when you need to stop and realize your kids can do more. If you're frustrated and overwhelmed because of all the work you have to do, your kids can help you and you can delegate some of it. Have a mentality we're all working together until this is done. A second thing that I have tried very hard to do and I don't always succeed at it, but is to completely focus on whatever is at hand. When I'm homeschooling, I am only homeschooling. I try to be fully present with the kids. I try to separate the time that I am homeschooling the kids from the time that I am doing other things on my own, errands, work online, any of that stuff. when I'm homeschooling them, I try to be fully present and active in what I'm doing. And this really applies to other areas as well. When we're working on a project here in our home, uh maybe updating some paint or doing some renovations, we are totally focused on that project at that time. So, at that time, probably the rest of our house is a mess. And you know, you would come over, it would not be something I would want anyone to see. but we're completely focused on that project that we're working on. In the opposite way, if we are having company over one night, whatever that project is, whatever other things are going on, those get pushed aside and our whole focus is getting the house company ready. So, in that moment, our house looks really nice and beautiful. But just completely focusing on whatever task is at hand has helped me to be a better manager of my time. I try as much as possible to keep my phone from distracting me and this is very challenging because there are some things that we do in our school time that require a phone. Um, but I try to keep it back in my bedroom. Screens are always something that are a distraction not only for kids but for parents as well. So if I'm going to be completely focused on what I'm doing, then that has to be something I'm not constantly thinking about isn't constantly in front of me. Another way that I've tried to streamline things so that we're not distracted with our schedule is to have at least three days a week where we're home, where nothing else is going on. We're not going out to co-op. We're not going on field trips. Um, those days are days we are at home. We are strictly getting schoolwork done. They're boring. They're, you know, everybody's here. It's nothing really exciting, but honestly, those are my favorite days because I feel like we make so much progress on our housework and just in our learning in general. And this applies as well to my quiet time. During quiet time, I take an hour and a half a day to myself. And I'm going to talk about this a little bit later on, but when I'm working by myself or resting during that alone time, the kids know it is completely alone time. I am in my room, the bedroom's doors closed, they are not supposed to come in unless there's an emergency. Just completely focusing on the task at hand. I've spent all day with them. I've been completely available to them every other hour of the day. So for that hour and a half quiet time, which I usually spend working on the blog or here on my channel, that is a time my kids know that they are not supposed to interrupt. My younger ones are napping. But if you can completely focus on the task at hand, I've always found that I'm a better manager of my time. A third thing is learning to be content. And there are things I don't do because I'm a busy mom of 10. There are things I would love doing. I would love to shop more. I would love to go on more field trips. That's something I would enjoy. There are things that I would love to do, but I don't do because I have a lot of children. We spend I spend a lot of days at home and this is the stage of life I'm in. I am so thankful for our kids and this is a blessing. But I try not to compare myself to friends who have a lot fewer kids and maybe kids in school because our lifestyles are just completely different. And I can't expect to have the same to spend my time the same way. I can't expect my house to look the same as another friend whose kids are gone all day. We have 10 kids living in our home. So, if you watch any of my videos and you want to zoom right in, you're going to see pencil marks on the walls. You're going to see chipping paint. We're always trying to keep up with things. It's challenging. And I have found that learning to be content is the key. It helps you not waste time trying to keep up with everyone else, but to actually accomplish the things that you really do value. Every time I had a new baby, I had to really practice this to lower my expectations considerably. And when you lower them, like lower lower them, and then go even lower because when you have an infant, it is just survival mode for so long. And uh I'm someone that just likes to get things done. I love to be productive. And I remember so many times just sitting there holding that baby that needed me. And of course, I I love those early infant days, but they're also so challenging to sit there and look around and see the mess, see all the work that needs to be done and just sit there and hold that baby. And sometimes that's hard to see the mess, you know, going on around you. But it was just really important for me to learn that at that time taking care of that baby in the most vulnerable time period of their life was so much more important than having my house like my friend's house. It's just a passing moment. And I think sometimes when you're a mom, you really have to put your blinders on and just accept the season that God has you in and and not always be looking at a person that's at a different stage. This applies to homeschooling as well. Don't compare your first or second year of homeschooling to someone who is 5 years ahead of you, 10 years ahead of you. This is our 16th year of homeschooling. And uh some things so many things are just automatic. I don't even think about them anymore. They're things that I probably spent so much time on at the beginning because I was just learning it. I didn't know how to do it. And then you have to fail sometimes. You have to do it the wrong way and realize that doesn't work. And this year of homeschooling looks nothing like homeschooling looked for me when I was in my third year. It was just so different. And it was completely different set of circumstances. This year we have three almost three drivers. I have kids who like to cook, kids who can clean up, it it's completely different. I have so many independent kids that are able to do a lot of their work on their own. And although it's really important to me to spend time individually with each of our kids helping them on their work, sometimes I can't get to someone right away. And if my daughter, for example, who's learning long division, if she's struggling over something and I can't get to her right away, I have about five or six other kids in the room that can show her how to do long division and usually get to it before I get there. So, this is the huge difference that I have as a mom that's homeschooling for the 16th year compared to what it was like when I was in my second or third year. And I remember having tears over long division many times because it was just uh the very beginning. I was putting in those foundational years and those foundational years have taken off. They're an investment I made a while ago and now our family is reaping the fruit of that. The fourth thing that I think is really important to prioritize when you want to manage your time well is to have some time alone to yourself every day. I've always taken alone time. Ever since my kids were young, they went down for naps or we had quiet time and I spent that time doing whatever I wanted to do. And sometimes that was reading. But in the early days, because I was pregnant almost every other year, some people when they're pregnant, they struggle with sickness. They get really, really sick. I always struggled with exhaustion. I was so tired all the time. When I had a moment to myself, finally, when it was quiet time, I usually just laid down and fell asleep. I struggled a lot with low iron. I had to take iron supplements when I was pregnant. And I always would feel bad that I was so tired. And the truth is, my body needed rest during that time. Nowadays, when I get time to myself, I usually spend it working on a hobby. And for me, that hobby has become the blog and my YouTube channel. It's something I really enjoy doing. I'm not as exhausted as I was when I was a younger mom. I'm not up at night with the baby right now. I have a little bit more free time, and when I get my free time, I'm not as exhausted as I once was. Someone asked me recently in a comment, "Are you always on or do you have times where you can just relax and do something you want to do?" And yes, I do. I have time every day where I take it to myself and I always have. It's just it looked different when I had younger kids because it's just so much more physically exhausting when your kids are all young. Now that I have older kids and I have time to myself, I do something that I enjoy doing. And I really think this is important. If you want to enjoy mothering and if you want to do well over the long haul, if you want to succeed long term, stepping away and taking breaks is going to help you come back refreshed and ready to jump in and do your work again. Another thing that I do when I get to my time alone, I always have a to-do list. It's very short. I don't have a lot on it. I only put on it what I know I can get done in that time period. And then I always start with the hardest thing first, whatever it is that I don't want to do or that I just would rather put off. It's always easier to answer a text, to answer an email, rather than to do that one thing that I don't want to do. but always working towards the things that you don't want to do, getting them out of the way, then you have the other things that are kind of your reward and something that isn't as hard for you. Those are the things that I leave last. And when you're trying to get things done, uh people always say, "I don't have enough time. I don't have enough time." But I've learned that time expands to fill the space allotted to it. And not having time is in some ways can be an asset because if you don't have a lot of time to get something done, if you only have an hour to get this, this, and this done, well then you'll find a way to make it work in that short period of time. Whereas if you have a list and endless amount of time, you're more prone to sit and think about it, overink about it, try to be a perfectionist. So, not having enough time is not necessarily a disadvantage. No, mom can always be on. If you take time away by yourself, it's ultimately a better way to manage your time because you'll have the energy when it's time to go back and to spend time with your family again. The last thing that has made such a big difference for me is prioritizing time with the Lord. This job as a mom, as a homeschool mom, has always seemed too big for me. And it's something that constantly drives me to depend on the Lord. I remember back to when we had our fourth or fifth child. Our first year of homeschooling, we had our fourth child. I had four kids, five and under. And then when we had our fifth, I think we had five kids, seven and under. It was a lot. and my husband and I both grew up in families with four kids, we were not homeschooled. So, just kind of breaking that barrier and getting into child number five, plus the homeschooling, it seemed way over my head. And so, I I feel like sometimes people don't want to hear this. They want to hear what what should I do? What can I do to manage my time better? Or tell me three steps I can take and I can just do that. But I found that anything that pushes you to depend on the Lord is a good thing. And ultimately, it's going to help you be more productive and more fruitful, especially with things that are eternal. You may be very successful in managing your time, but what you're doing isn't going to have eternal fruit. One of the biggest reasons that I wanted to homeschool was to have close relationships with our kids and to be able to share our faith with them. And to me, this is investing in something that is eternal. This is disciplehip. And so if you want to produce spiritual fruit, it hinges on your relationship with the Lord, intimacy with the Lord, spending time in his word in prayer, this is the secret. This is the source of your strength. It's what's going to help you manage your time well. It's going to help you focus on the things that are important. Forget the things that are hindering you, that are just roadblocks and going to keep you from what you value and what you want to spend your time on, what matters to you. Many times I've asked the Lord in prayer, would you bring to mind things that I should be doing today? And if there's anything on my list that's not important, would you help me to just overlook that or be willing to cross it off to get to these other things? Ask the Lord, order my steps today so that you can spend your time wisely. Thank you for listening today. If you learned anything from this topic, I'd love to hear what's helped you. And I'd also love to hear ways that you have learned to manage your time well in your home. So, leave a comment below. Keep the conversation going. I love hearing from other homeschool moms. If you enjoyed watching this video, you may enjoy watching the video I did last week. Are my homeschooled kids behind? Five questions to ask yourself. Thanks for watching. I'll see you next time.