Wedding Family Photos 101: Everything You Need to Know

Hi, I'm Kevin Elizabeth, a wedding photographer based in San Diego. Today's video is going to be everything you need to know about wedding family photos. Just in case I use the other term for wedding family photos, we also call them family formals in the industry, as in more of a formal photograph, everybody's smiling at the camera. So I might use those terms interchangeably. And I had an older video on this, but I realized that it didn't actually discuss everything that you need to know to make this run really smooth and actually be super helpful for all parts of the family photos. So that's what I'm going to be covering today. I'm going to talk about pretty much everything that I can think of related to family photos. And if I miss something, please feel free to ask me down in the comments and I will do my best to answer as well as I can. I recently did a video about shot lists and I talked about how they're not really so great when it comes to your wedding photography, with the exception of, we do need a shot list for your family photos. And I'll talk about the length of that and what you should put on there in a minute. But I do want to say that at least for my weddings, most of the family photos that we're scheduling a separate time for typically before the ceremony. But again, I'll talk about when you should do these later and that's going to mostly be the immediate family and sometimes grandparents. So parents, siblings, maybe grandparents. And usually for the extended family, we either don't do a big formal group photo or what's really great, especially if you're running short on time or don't want to be standing around for forever. Taking post family photos is to grab up your extended family members during cocktail hour and find your photographer or the photographer second shooter and say, Hey, can you grab a photo of us? And that's something that's really great to do for those extended family photos. And especially if there's a huge group of extended family, you can just go from chunk to chunk. And I think that that makes it a little bit more manageable than trying to cram a hundred people in all of these family photos during the wedding day in one little time slot. Cause it gets tiring. It does get really exhausting standing in the same place and smiling at the camera. Cause when you're the bride and groom or bride and bride, groom and groom, typically you're standing in the middle and you don't move everybody else comes in and out. So you've been standing there smiling at the camera for who knows how long and it can be very draining. So I suggest to keep your groups minimal when it comes to your actual family photo list. I typically will give my clients a couple of check boxes for the more standard groups and then I will leave a box for them to put in any extra. What I truly appreciate because I asked for it and I love when my clients followed the direction is knowing the names of these people. So it's not very helpful for me to have it say bride and groom plus bride's aunt and uncle. I need to know that their names are Bob and Sue. So instead of shouting for, okay, I mean the bride's uncle and there might be more than one uncle. I can shout for, Hey, we need Bob next. We need Sue. You guys are going to be in the next photo. That's so easy. So please say who everybody is. If you are listing out a group of like 30 people, you could maybe just put like the Smith family or mother's side of the family, the Lanier. I don't know. You can put something like that. So we can just call for like, okay, everybody in the Smith family. So put names to identify people. And if it's a huge group, then just put like the big family last names in there. So at least we know who we're calling out for. Now when it comes to the amount of time it takes for family photos, I typically will estimate for two to three minutes per group. And that is to be on the safe side. And that is a pretty general good rule of thumb for groups that are anywhere from maybe four people to about eight to maybe 10 people. And you might be thinking, Oh, well, isn't it just super quick. You just line them up and you take the photo and you're done. It should take 30 seconds, right? No. What I have to do is I have to get everybody lined up who is in the photos. We have to determine, make sure everybody's there. Then I'm going to pose each member of the family. I don't like to leave family members hanging. I don't just pose the bride and groom. I make sure everybody feels and looks great. And so that's what's also taking time. And sometimes people just don't listen or I'll be like, okay, I need you guys to back up. I need everyone on a straight line. And for some reason, when I say I need everyone on a straight line, half the people in the group forget what it means to be in a straight line. So that's just one of those things that I repeatedly am having to deal with. I'm like, okay, no, no, no. Back up. You guys back up. We need a straight line. You guys are curving, stop curving, like straighten out. And it can take a really long time. And this is one of those things where I appreciate when the family members are paying attention instead of talking to each other, because we can get this done a lot faster, but it usually is going to be around two to three minutes per group. Now if it's just you and your spouse and both of your parents, it might be a little bit quicker, but two to three minutes is a safe way to go because of that. I typically recommend to my couples that there are no more than 10 to 12 groups. And that is because I know how long this is going to take. So if we had 15 groups and if they all took about three minutes, that's going to be 45 minutes straight of family photos. That is a lot of time. Okay? Trust me when I say that you're probably not going to enjoy doing that unless it is a cultural tradition and you were very much used to that. It is hard to be doing that for 45 minutes straight. Even during the couples portraits, we're moving, we're changing you into different positions and locations, but for family photos, you're sticking right there in the same spot, but the long time. Also, I want to make sure that my couples are aware that I recommend 10 to 12 groupings max because if we are doing more than that, it is going to put into bridal party portrait time and couple portrait time. So that is something to be aware of. If you value the couples portraits or you want a lot of bridal party portraits, then make sure that you're not giving a 45 grouping list because let me tell you, nobody can shoot 45 different groups in like 30 minutes. It is not possible, just not possible. So I'm going to say keep it on the shorter side. People of four to six groupings that usually goes faster. If you've got 15 plus people in multiple groupings, I honestly might even recommend adding on five minutes per grouping if it's that big, especially if you have 30 plus people, that's going to take a really long time compared to four or five, six, seven, eight people in a photo. That's 40 people that you have to get lined up paying attention. I have to make sure I can see everybody's heads. So it's all these different factors that take up a lot of time and I've spent a lot of time on this time section, but I think it's really important to manage your expectations and you might be saying, Oh, we've got all these different people and we're not sure how we can make it like fewer groups. You want to photograph all these people. Typically I recommend condensing photos. So if you have a bunch of aunts and uncles, so instead of doing a photo with just your mom's like siblings and you guys do it with your mom's siblings and you guys and your dad's and you guys, so you can condense it. Also just personal preference. If you have a sibling who has a fiance, then it's not really worth it to take a family photo with the fiance and then a family photo without the fiance. Just leave the fiance in there and just take that one photo. You can find ways to condense this if your group list is really long and think about the groupings that are most important to you. But if you want 45 groupings and just be aware that that might take over an hour to accomplish and that's going to cut into other parts of the day. So everything with weddings is a give and a take. Sometimes you truly cannot have it all. You have to make compromises based on what's most important to you. When you should have your family photos really comes down to whether or not you're doing a first look. I typically recommend that my couples choose to do a first look because we can do at least all of the immediate family photos before the ceremony and then they're done. Then they don't have to worry about people wandering off the cocktail hour. Everybody can go straight to enjoying the bar and the appetizers. And I find that that's less stressful for everybody because then after the ceremony, the couple can go straight to cocktail hour, not worry about posing right after the ceremony. So I think that that's just something that's nice to do. Now, if you do not want to do a first look, then you are going to have to do all of your family photos immediately after the ceremony ends to the beginning of cocktail hour. So what's going to be really helpful, especially if your family portraits are going to be taking place at your ceremony site, which is usually a nice place to take them if the lighting is great because normally it's got flowers and a beautiful backdrop. Then what I recommend is making sure that your guests who are not part of the family are ushered away from that site because guests are going to want to talk to you guys. And it's going to really put a delay in those family photos, which is then going to delay your bridal party. And then it's going to delay your couple's photos. And you might only be left with 10, 15 minutes for couples portraits by the end of cocktail hour. And that's probably not a situation that you want to end up with to make sure your planner or the officiant has everybody go away to cocktail hour and the family stays. Now that's something that I recommend. Another alternative sometimes is when couples did do a first look, they do the immediate family before the ceremony, and then they'll do extended after because maybe the extended family wasn't there early enough for the photo. So that's something you can do. Maybe it'll take five to 10 minutes tops, and then you can go off to your cocktail hour in terms of where the family photos should take place. I highly recommend that you have your photographer select the location and listen to them for their suggestions and advice, because they're not just going to be looking at a pretty backdrop. They're also going to be considering the light. So typically what I prefer to do is if we are shooting them before the ceremony, I will just find a clean backdrop. If I can shoot the ceremony site and guests aren't arriving yet, then I will shoot them in front of the arch or whatever it is they have for the ceremony. And that's going to be nice if they are lit the way I want them, which is backlit. So the sun coming from behind, it is way too hard to shoot a group of people with the sun shining directly on them. Nobody's going to be able to see and it's going to be very harsh light. It's going to be extremely difficult to have a photo where everyone's eyes are open. Even if you do the one, two, three open trick. I know for me, my eyes are extremely sensitive to light, so I just cannot have my eyes open whatsoever staring right into the sign. Like they would just be a watering nest. So I try to choose a backlit situation with a clean backdrop, something that's minimally clutter free or is really clean, matches the wedding colors and just looks nice and matches the overall style of the couple's wedding day. So if the couple has a lot of pastel colors in their wedding, I'm not going to shoot the family photos in front of a black wall or a neon wall or a bold red wall. I'm going to try to pick something that's softer and that pairs with their color palette so that everything looks cohesive in their gallery. Now, typically I will try to also shoot these photos in front of the ceremony site if we did not do a first look or if there's extended family photos to be done, but it is nice when all the rest of the guests get the heck out of the space so I can get straight to work. One really important component to where the family photos are photographed is if there is a family member or members who have mobility disabilities. And I'm going to create an entire video all about this in the next few weeks. But if you have a grandmother or an aunt or uncle or a parent who's wheelchair bound or who simply cannot walk very far distances, please let us know that because I don't want to select the most gorgeous location, 50 feet away from the venue, only to find out that your grandmother will not be able to make it over there. And we either have to shoot everything there without her. And then everybody has to move to a second spot or we have to ditch that amazing location, move to where grandma is and do every family photo there. So please let us know ahead of time. If anybody on your family grouping list has mobility issues or if anybody in your family group has a mental disability that might make family photos a little bit more difficult, just let us know that I've had several brides who have told me, Oh, my cousin or my niece or my nephew or my sister has severe autism. So during the photos, it might be a big challenge just to let you know. I want to know that so that I don't think that family member is just being extremely difficult. I want to know that there is a reason that that is happening for them. And so I know ahead of time and I ask, okay, what's a great way to make sure it goes smoothly for them. So please let us know that. Please don't let that be a surprise for us because it can be a sensitive situation, but the better we know, the better we can photograph it and make it pleasant for that person and not as difficult as it might've been at past weddings. Now, if you've got a huge family, then what's going to be really helpful is having a location with stairs or location nearby your ceremony site that we can pull chairs. I typically try to have no more than about 10 people on one line, unless it's a group of 50 people, in which case we're going to probably have to have more, but I will like to stack with layers, some people sitting in chairs, some people standing, maybe even some people sitting on the ground if it's appropriate for the situation. So if you've got a group of 15 people, I'm definitely going to be using some chairs. So having a location nearby where I can grab chairs is extremely helpful. This last part is going to focus on how to make this run as smoothly as possible for you guys, as well as your family members. The first thing you need to do, and you need to do this at least twice is to tell your family members and do the same thing with bridal party, by the way, where to meet and when they should be meeting for family photos. So if it is before the ceremony, say to all of your family members, maybe write them an email. Once you know the timeline and then remind them all at your rehearsal dinner, meet us in the lobby or by this place at four 15, please do not be late. Please show up on time. If you have chronically late family members, tell them to be there for, that is something that is going to be so helpful because if we're standing around waiting on family members that need to be there to complete the photos, it's just going to delay the time. And we might be late on multiple things just because of those couple of people running late. So please tell them when and where to be. Even if you don't know exactly where the photos are going to be taken, just pick an easy spot to meet. And then we can grab them or your photographer can grab them, take them to the photography spot. Now you need to also tell all of your family members to pay attention to the photographer, tell them to be quiet and listen up. And that might sound really strict, but honestly it makes the biggest difference in the world. When I have groups of people who are quiet listening or they're just talking really quietly with each other, but they're able to hear and pay attention when it's their time that makes it go so much faster. So sometimes I will allot 30 minutes for family photos and it will only take 10 or 15 and that's incredible. But sometimes I have groups of people who do not listen to me whatsoever and it can end up taking 30 to 45 minutes and that is just really stressful for everybody. Usually in those situations, I see the bride getting very tense and stressed because she knows it's running late and she knows that nobody's paying attention. So please make sure that you tell everybody to listen up, be positive and you can say the faster that we're done with this, the sooner you can get to the bar or be done with it. Whatever motivation they need is really, really great. The next thing, the bride and groom or the groom and groom bride and bride is what happens during family photos. Again, I've mentioned this stay in the same spot when I have a bride or a groom who starts wandering off in between photos, I have to pull them back in and like it just becomes this whole process. So stand in the same place and do not move. If people are trying to talk to you, wave them over to you, stay in the same spot and all of the family will move in and out around you. That is also going to help speed things up. Another thing that I recommend is having a family member who knows all of the people who are on your list. So if I'm like, where is aunt Jane? Your sister can say, Oh, she's right there. Let me go grab her. So it's really nice to have somebody, especially if you've got a large group of people in your family and have a designated person who can help us out to find the right people. Because sometimes even if we're calling out and shouting names, people aren't listening. So it's great to have somebody who can help us with that list. The last thing I'm going to talk about is family drama. Now there are all sorts of family drama. I cannot possibly cover every situation in this, but I'm just going to say that if there is family drama between the bride and the groom's family or bride, bride, the couple's families, then that is something that I would recommend having separate locations and times for the photos. So say for the bride's family, meet us at four at this location for photos groups, family, meet us out for 30 at this other location to keep those families separate if need be. If you have family drama within your own family, so you're the bride's family, there's drama between some people. Please let us know ahead of time. So this is great to know if you have divorced parents. Now divorces come in all different shapes and sizes. Some divorced parents are totally cool with each other and they'll stand in the same photo, talk all night. It'll be great. Some divorced parents don't want to even see the sight of each other. So there are different levels to this. So please tell your photographer, Hey, my parents are divorced. Not only do they need to know that, so they don't tell your mom and dad to stand next to each other and hold hands, but it's also nice to know, can they be in the same photo? I always ask questions like that. If there are divorced parents, do they need separate photos or can they be in the same photo? Now I will put them on separate sides or I will separate them with some siblings or something, but this is good to know how many photos I need a lot for. If you've got people in your family who maybe are a little bit difficult, like a crazy aunt, somebody asked me about, and you don't really want them in photos, tell them the extended family photos are going to take place during cocktail hour. Don't have them be during the family photos at the spot where those are being taken and disrupting the photos. If you think that's going to happen. And I know that this was just a brief overview of different kinds of family drama, but there are solutions to everything. So I would say the first step is to talk to your photographer about it because your photographer might want to do things differently than I would to talk to your photographer, tell them the situation and say, what do you think we should do? What would be the best for everybody? And also for the photos with this drama in mind, or with this person in mind, that is your first step. The second step is to really prep your family members. Say, Hey, it's really important to us that everybody gets along during these photos. We want it to run smoothly. And I find sometimes it's sitting down and having an honest conversation can solve a lot of problems. That is pretty much it for the family photo video. I hope I've covered pretty much everything. Again, if I have not, you guys are welcome to ask me questions down in the comment section below. But if you have questions that might be better suited for your specific photographer, definitely go to them because they might go fully differently than I would on the advice. Anyways, guys, hope you enjoyed this video. If you did, please be sure to leave a like and I'll see you next time. Bye.