Postmates Code: W7WCI (get $10 in delivery credit!)
What's up, guys?
Welcome to the neighborhood, Scott!
Good job.
Did you plan this, Jason?
It was her idea.
You looked so nervous, it was so cute.
You looked like you were nervous to give me cookies and you threw an egg at me.
Hi.
What's up, Mr. Rips?
How the hell did you get in here?
I walked right in.
Hey, listen.
We've got problems.
I need that bow back, man.
You haven't surprised me with anything.
I need to surprise somebody else.
I wasn't ready yet.
I know, but you've got to surprise me with something.
I mean, unless you wanted to surprise me with something really dumb.
Why don't you do this?
Go in your refrigerator, grab a bottle of water, put the bow on it.
Surprise me with a bottle of water.
Oh, Scott, you shouldn't have.
Well, I didn't get it to you yet.
Jason!
Scott, I have to go.
I'm really late.
I wanted to give you something.
What?
Scott!
How could you?
It's not just a bow.
What?
It's a water bottle.
Oh, my God!
Scott, thank you.
Of course.
So much for this gift.
That's amazing.
You don't want the water?
Oh, what?
You don't want the water?
No.
Man, that was a great Scott and Jay bit, I'll tell you.
We're back, baby.
That was a good one.
I loved it.
You're one of my faves.
It was fantastic.
Okay, I will bring this back.
What's going on right now?
I don't know.
I think Dave's going to blow up the garage, I think.
I'm trying to work out.
When am I going to work out?
You look like you worked out enough.
I didn't even start.
I literally just started.
All right.
We can all work out.
Jay, is it confusing that you're Jay and I'm Jay?
Yeah, I said that.
I went away for a year and I came back and you were Jay.
You were Jason and then I came back and everyone was Jay.
Because I've had other friends that just call me Nash or Jason.
Can I call you Nash?
Sure, but they don't.
They won't.
You've got to convince him because he's the ringleader.
Whatever he calls you, who else is going to call you?
Hey, Dave.
Can we make up a name for you?
Hey, Dave.
Hmm?
Is it hard with me being Jay and him being Jay?
Yeah, it is confusing.
What should we do about it?
You guys look alike, too.
Same body.
Wait a minute.
Oh, my God.
It's Bellingham vibes.
Are you ready?
Keep doing it.
Keep going.
It's Vanity Fair's hot guys frolicking by the pool.
Start off summer with a back flip.
Okay.
Hold on.
I missed it.
It's so cold.
Hold on.
I missed it.
It's cold?
Is it heated?
Man, I remember when we lived together.
You guys would come out, hang by the pool.
Yeah.
Look at it.
And you know what?
You guys look even better than before, I think.
Jason, what should we do for your vlog?
Oh, my God.
That is the best sentence I've ever heard anyone say.
What should we do for your vlog?
Jason.
No.
Not what should we do for your vlog.
Jason, what should we do for your vlog?
Jump back in the pool.
I don't give a...
Yeah.
Do you guys want to see Todd jump in the pool?
They said yes.
Okay.
I picture that like a Dora the Explorer thing.
Do you guys want to see Todd jump in the pool?
If you guys want to see Todd jump in the pool, choose this video.
If you want to see Scott jump in the pool, choose this video.
Hey, shrinkage.
Am I right?
I should get bigger in the cold.
I can't believe it's a Saturday and we finally have a day off to enjoy the pool.
Yeah.
Finally.
I thought it was Wednesday.
Don't you see these guys with all these amazing talents and go like, why the... does anybody
watch us?
All the time.
I can't even imagine.
We meet so many people that can do cool stuff.
Because everybody else doesn't have talent, so they want to see people they can relate
to.
I'm just kidding.
You're not lame.
We're relatable.
Yeah.
We're relatable.
Because we're so basic.
Yeah.
That's our joie de vivre.
That's what people like about it.
Scott, did you just crack the code?
I'm relatable because I'm sad and a lot of people get sad sometimes.
Yeah, true.
What I'm saying is basically don't overdo it and don't get better.
Yeah, I guess so.
Yeah, don't get a good talent.
Why is Todd relatable?
Because he is...
I'm hilarious?
Well, he used to not be.
Really good looking.
Todd, I don't think you know the definition of relatable.
I think that he's relatable now because he's not the best looking.
He's just decent.
He's just a normal guy.
I think he's relatable because he's trying a lot of new things and succeeding.
And nothing is working for him.
And my music is relatable because it's mediocre.
Why is Jay relatable?
Jay's not relatable.
Jay, they just roasted you.
Oh no, here he comes.
Pride of Iowa.
Where are you from?
My house.
Damn, you come at you fast.
He's quick.
What was the roast?
Oh, the roast.
That was really funny.
I'll have to watch the vlog.
Well, I'll never know.
Roast me.
Yeah, those shorts are...
There's a little tight.
You can see all of the various tattoos that he's gotten only on his legs.
Todd, you look like you went on vacation to Hawaii and went to the gift shop and that's all they had.
I got those in the gift shop.
You did?
In Barcelona?
Exactly.
They are gift shop shorts.
Like, they're not bad, but they don't fit.
Those are $200 shorts.
I bet.
No, I like them, but they're just a little tight.
Todd's got a big ass.
Ever been in the back of the Tesla when Todd doesn't have a seat and his ass is just in your face?
It wasn't me in the back of the Tesla.
Oh right, that wasn't you.
I got my stem cell shot up last week and then there was no room in the Tesla and Todd was drunk and he sat on my leg.
For like 20 minutes.
At the same time I was like, I wanted him to sit on it because he was being real cuddly.
And I was like, I'll put up with it because it feels good.
He like does this, but he also gets his face so close to you.
Last night he was trying to convince me to keep going out and now I'm sorry I didn't.
He was like, come on, come on, come on, let's go, let's go, let's go.
And I was like, no, I'm going home.
Man, I'm getting an entire vlog here today.
This is great.
Content house, guys.
Damn.
It's just content all the time.
We got a pool.
We got a basketball player.
Scott, you got a cool name for the house?
Skae's house.
Skae?
Skae.
Oh, Scott and Jay?
Scott and Jay.
He didn't like it.
It sounds bad.
It sounds like a new STD.
Yeah, it sounds like an STD.
He's got Skae.
He was with Claudia.
She gave him Skae.
You need a cool name for the house.
What do you guys think?
Comment down below.
That's old school YouTube right there.
He's a pro.
Yeah, he did it.
He just nailed it.
That's the equivalent of a reporter standing in the middle of a snowstorm and just nailing
it.
It's how you trick the algorithm.
How?
It's not how you trick the algorithm, but it's how you get more comments and more activity
on your video.
Really?
Yeah, you just tell them.
Does that work?
You need help with something?
Ask for a suggestion.
Down below in the comments.
Hey, guys.
Should I get a haircut?
Comment down below.
One question for video so you don't get a bunch of different answers.
You don't know what the answer is.
Wait a minute.
One says yes.
One says no.
And one says...
Maybe.
Grass house.
The grass house.
That's it.
You got it.
Grass house.
Because it's green.
It's fresh.
It's a fresh new house.
We'll call it the grass house.
Okay.
We're at the gig.
LMU.
I can barely ride in a car anymore.
Demon drove though, so I shouldn't really complain.
Stretch the back out.
Look at all these sauces.
Polynesian sauce.
Herb ranch.
Barbecue.
Honey mustard.
This is my foster dog.
This is my friend.
He smells so good.
Are you kidding me?
It's your foster dog?
It's my friend's foster dog.
Are they looking for a home?
Yes.
He's looking for a home.
What kind of dog is he?
He gets really nervous.
I think he wanted to walk around.
Ryan's going to take up the back.
Everyone else, we're going to kind of surround them for the secret service.
Got it?
Protect David at all costs.
We need to make sure public safety is ready.
So just give me one sec.
Guys, if someone has to go down, make it Mike Shepherd.
Okay?
Oh my god, it's at least 16 people.
No!
They're not after me.
David starts doing magic tricks.
You guys want to see a card trick?
Wait, no, no, no. Just think of a card.
Matt, Matt, give me a deck of cards.
Okay, I'm here at CSUN.
We're with Valerie and Soraya, student liaisons.
Jack is here.
Dima's here.
Guys, Dima, we hit the jackpot.
Whoa, private bathroom.
Come on in, let's take a look.
Guys, get in here.
Come on, come on, come on, come on, come.
Does anybody have to go?
You got to go?
Okay, go on, try it out.
Is there anything happening on campus that's fun to talk about?
Right now, just like, because we're on the events team,
this is kind of like the main event we're having.
Really? Oh my god.
Yeah, tickets were sold out in like six hours.
Really?
People are lined up now waiting.
Yeah.
How many seats is it?
It's like 250 or something.
You're a star.
Well, I don't know about that.
I mean, I guess.
These chicken fingers, they kind of do.
They ring of talent and stardom, I tell ya.
Those ought to look pretty good.
Everybody say, David sucks!
David sucks!
Don't keep chasing the wall.
What's up, guys?
Now let's do an alt version.
David is the best!
That was pretty good.
Seems like you guys like the David is best better.
That one sounded better.
Everybody lower their expectations.
I'm in a sweatsuit that matches.
Wow, look at all this.
Whoa!
San Pellegrino.
They spared no expense.
All right, quickly, Dima and Jack, get on stage and let's test the mic.
Interview Jack for a second.
Jack, can you get up there, please?
Okay, and introduce Jack.
Jack, stand over there for a second.
Dima, sit down.
You know.
Welcome, everyone, to the CSUN's very own...
What do you want me to say?
Welcome to CSUN's Inside Hollywood series.
My guest today is the one and only...
Jack Reed.
Jack Reed, go.
Welcome, everyone, to CSUN.
This is the Inside Hollywood series.
My guest today is Jack Reed.
Yeah!
How did you arrive at 15%?
And just to be clear, I'm not making it sound like that's a small number.
That's true.
Ten is good.
Twenty is piggish.
Fifteen feels right.
Okay, we got it.
What if no one hits it?
Like, what do we do?
What do we do if no one...
This could be disastrous.
Damn!
Man!
I'm going to try something.
Dima, bring it out.
We're going to have a putt-putt right now for $2,500.
You want Jack to putt for you?
Yeah.
Okay.
Oh!
She's going to call a lifeline.
She's calling to Jack Reed.
Oh!
You want Jack to go for you?
Jack, come on.
Dima gets me a lip liner.
Thank you so much for coming.
You don't know how much it means to me.
I'm like, oh, my God.
I've been watching you guys since, like, I was in eighth grade.
Oh!
Yeah.
I mean, thank you.
Really?
Yeah.
Really?
I dragged her here.
She dragged me here.
She what?
I dragged her here today.
Really?
Yeah.
And you walked over...
You dragged her?
No, I dragged her.
You dragged her here, and you won $3,500.
How crazy is that, right?
Isn't life weird?
It's amazing.