Benedict & Sophie ‣ their story [Bridgerton s4]

I would give anything to go to a ball, dancing in a beautiful room instead of cleaning it, being looked at as if you belong in the room instead of as if you were a part of the furniture. It is unlikely that I will ever marry. Benedict Bridger! I am only saying the eligible ladies of the tom, many of them are lovely, but they all have the same dream of marriage. They display no true animation, no zest for life, no personality. I am charting a more venturesome course outside good society. In doing so, I'm being true to myself. Let us turn our attention this year instead to offering up a leading suitor to fire the competition. Could I trouble you for the next dance? Uh, sir? What are you hiding? Forgive me for interrupting. I have just found this young lady's dance card. But, unfortunately, my name is up next. You met a gentleman. That is true. I met a gentleman. Dare I ask his name? What is your name? Why did you rescue me? It is rare to see someone beaming with joy at one of these things. It is positively spilling out of you. Benedict Bridgerton? There it is. It is nothing! Does he not possess the qualities you seek? Qualities? What if he is looking for you? Find a suitor. Oh, I am not looking for a husband. You are not? No. Is it that we've met? No, I cannot dance. That is the truth. I cannot dance. A lady who cannot dance? I could ask for a chaperone if it would make you more comfortable. Surely there is a maid nearby. I shall have to trust you for tonight. He is looking for you. He asked for posy. It is a spectacular night. It is a moment and it is over. I will never see him again. He is there. You are not like the other young ladies, you know. You should go in. Perhaps he will recognise you. He will not. And what is wrong with the other young ladies? Well, I am only... It is one night a moment. He does not even know what I look like. So this is your home then, which makes you a Bridgerton. Go in there and tell him who you are. You really did not know who I am? Not until now. This is your chance, Sophe. Who are you? Where did you grow up? Here. Will you not wade up deeper with me? He does not want to find me. He wants to find the lady in the silver gown. You put your hand in mine. And she is not real. I have work to do. Now you move a little closer. It was you. You marked my silver shoes. You slipped into the masquerade ball. You are quite the teacher. And you are quite the pretender. I should have put you out on the street. What is wrong, Cavender? You are dismissed. Dancing already with your eyes closed? I am trying to remember this moment exactly, so that if I wish, Mr. Bridgerton, I can escape here. Forgive me, but do we know one another? You are perhaps the most intriguing person I have ever met. Did you work for a household I visited? If I cannot know your name or where you live... No, we do not know each other. However, am I meant to call on you tomorrow? Then how do you know my name? I heard it. That will not be possible. A silver ingenue who can never be seen again. Where are you going? Away, sir. I must find other work. I will find another position for you in London. Somewhere safe. I have already tried that. No, we should not. We should not what? Please, you cannot walk in the dark. It is unsafe. I assure you I will not lay a hand on you. Unlike Cavender, I was raised to respect maids. I shall not even look at you. We must find the owner of this glove. Why ever do you have a lady's glove? Because a lady lost it. It was the most extraordinary night of my life. Please tell me your name. Have you taken an interest in a young lady? No. Are you certain we have not met? Well, it is midnight. Time for everyone to reveal themselves, including you at last. How could we have, sir? I must go. My name only a maid. Benedict has met a young lady. I am merely trying to return a glove. A glove of a lady dressed in silver with whom you disappeared. Please, do not leave. I barely know what she looked like and can no longer remember the sound of her voice. Searching for her has been fruitless. Remind me of your name again? I did not give it. Sophie Peck. All I have is this glove. I am not getting married any time soon. But you wanted to. To the glove lady. I thought it could be possible. I have a cottage not far from here. We can wait out the rain there. She clearly did not agree. Why would she? Why would she not? You and I both know. I am not the Bridgerton anyone should give their heart to. Altitude! I climbed through the window. Servants are resourceful. Unserious one. Wood meet flame. The rake, the free spirit. The fire needs kindling. Mr. Bridgerton? Sir? Please, take any book that interests you. Unless you cannot read. Oh, forgive me. I know how to read. I have never seen anyone eat a meal with such enthusiasm. Are you not supposed to be in bed? Do you know what is interesting about spending all day in bed? What? Nothing. Mr. Bridgerton is most kind. But I would not mistake his kindness for familiarity. We are past the formality. Call me Bernadette. Sophie? That is my French grammar book. Who's there? I will mend it. Just give me a moment. I am not famed for my patience. Though my curiosity is rather strong. So I can wait here forever. On peut parler en français. Si tu préfères. Ha! My apologies for doubting you. You might as well show yourself. My pronunciation is exquisite. You know, I would not be offended if in fact you followed me here. I did... Of course I did not follow you. You should not have been in the lake anyhow. The water was freezing. And you should not be swimming when you have been unwell. But if we are quite so concerned with shoulds, then you should not have been spying. I was most certainly not spying. I think you were. I was not. So you did not notice me. I cannot help but notice you. It is important for all of us to remember our place. It will be a short walk. I see. How short exactly? So short in fact that your new job is where I live. Sophie, I apologize. It was improper. I do have some business to transact about the estate this week, but I have no interest in getting in your way. It is a large house. We will hardly see one another. I regret it. I apologize. You need not apologize. Which is that I have returned intent on finding the lady in silver. I thought you had given her up. I would not give up so easily. Excuse me. We might be here all night. It is difficult finding someone who does not wish to be found. How are you finding your position? My sisters are not wearing you out, are they? No, not at all. I find them to be delightfully surprising. Good. When we were at my cottage, do you remember asking me about whether I ever felt out of place? Ah, never mind. Are you in need of assistance? It is a slippery little thing and I cannot find my wallet. May I? Ever since I was a child I have wished to be part of a family like yours. Even to work for one is a dream. You deserve more. We all chase the imagined to some extent. I am still expecting to see your father around every corner. If you wish to stay, I do not want to jeopardize that for you. But I also know that reality is where love grows. Reality feeds your heart. It is all very well to dream, but Benedict, you can only chase the imagined. Really, no more for me. Damn it! Forgive me. Good night, Mr. Pritchett. There will be others with whom you will find a spark. Young ladies of the ton, in silver or otherwise. Leave it. Sophie? I will return with another cup. What are you... Do not leave me. Do not leave me again. If you wish me to leave, I will. But the truth is I stay away because you consume me. Please do not go. When I search for you in every room I enter, my heart beats when you are near. The reality of you has become more tantalizing than any fantasy ever could be. And one I cannot live without. Be my mistress. What is so terrible about it? Nearly every high society gentleman has a mistress, Sophie. I know that. Better than anyone, surely. I had to see you. You did not answer my letter. Because I do not wish to see you. You did not answer my letter, and I understand why. When we were in the stairwell, I was so taken by the moment. Yes, I understand. We were both carried away. Is that all it was to you? Why have you brought me here? What do you want? I... I had hoped for an answer. To whether or not I will be your mistress. You truly do not know me at all. But if you did, you would know that being your mistress is the last thing I would ever want. My answer is no. Sophie. Mr. Bridgerton. Do you need something? No. I found it. Who is this woman to you? She is someone I met one night at a ball some months ago. Do you have feelings for her? No, I did. Until I met you. Is she someone you would have married? It does not matter. It is you that I want now, Sophie. Sophie, tell me what is wrong. It would be easier to inform you of what is right. That is not an answer. Then I am afraid I shall not give you one now. Please leave me alone. No, I am not going anywhere, not this time. Why do you find it suitable to kiss me? I cannot be subjected to more. I will leave first and no other servant see me. I do not care who sees. Of course you do not care who sees. But when do you stop to think about me? Every moment of every day. Because you are irresistible. There is not a single moment you do not fill my mind. I have heard every qualm you have raised about being with me and I wish there were some other way for us to be together. But why is it suitable? Why was it suitable to kiss me by the lake or in the stairwell? Would you have found it suitable to kiss the lady that you met at that ball? Or would you have been a gentleman and refused to ruin her? Would you have asked her to be your mistress? Do you truly understand what you are asking me with that question? But how else am I to be with a woman society has made it impossible for me to be with? The woman I was foolish enough to fall in love with. What? I love you, Sophie. How can a woman trust you to navigate a complicated life with her when she cannot trust you even to navigate her feelings? You are the person I have been searching for all my life. I love you. Of course I love you. I love you. I promised myself I would never, never fall into bed with a gentleman and I broke that promise for you. And your stupid hair and your stupid eyes and that stupid smile. Good thing I am no gentleman. It is not a joke, Benedict. I know. What is this? A world, just for us. I took what happened last night with the utmost seriousness. I was not caught up. I love you, Sophie. I sent word to the Crabtrees to prepare my cottage so that we might live there permanently. Love is always a thing to be proud of. The world needs more of it. Hmm. Then let me love you. My love for you is greater than anything I have felt before. It will not be what you deserve, but I can offer you a better life. You will never again have to wait before dawn or clean or mend. And we will be together. Is it all right? I want you. I've wanted you for so long. I know you'll want me one day, and you cannot do that with her. Can I not? No. Not in the way that you would like. I'm here because I have failed in my duties to my family lately and it has taken a toll. It will continue taking a toll if you carry on as you are. But think, if you ever have a family, what the reality of life would be like for those children. They'll never be able to join our family. Not truly. They'll be shunned by society. I hope you being here tonight means you have decided to let her be for her sake. I have an interview tomorrow at Penwood House under the new Lady of the House. I wanted to say goodbye. I promised I would take care of you. And that remains true whether or not you are with child. That is kind of you. Most gentlemanly, but you do not owe me anything. This was never to do with owing you something. It was about... Love. I thought it could be enough. I wanted it to be enough, but we both know it is not. What is love in the face of generations of established practice? In the face of society? Of the strong lines drawn to divide us? I do not wish to fight against all of that any more than you do. If I do not see you again, goodbye, Mr Bridgerton. You spent our entire lives claiming the one thing that matters is marrying a love match. For years, I did not understand it, nor want it. In fact, I ran from it. Goodbye, Sophie. And now, now I have found someone I love more than I could even have thought possible. Someone captivating and maddening and real, just as you wanted. Just as Daphne and Anthony and Colin and Francesca... You love her. It does not signify, does it? She is not of the right class, so I cannot be with her. Not truly, I must let her go as if she means nothing. Is it because of Benedict that you feel you must depart? Tell me, is that what you would have done had father been of the lower classes? Tossed your love aside to search for someone of proper breeding? All I have ever wanted for my children was to find love, so if you have found it, you deserve to go after it before it is too late. Is Sophie down here? Mr Bridgerton. Constable, this is the thief I was telling you about. She accepted another position with a family moving to the Americas. The Americas? Araminta, please! At this time, I have no choice but to sentence you... Sir! I must ask you to release this woman at once! What is the meaning of this? Who, sir, are you? Benedict Bridgerton, son to the late Viscount Edmund Bridgerton and brother to the Viscount Anthony Bridgerton. What is going on exactly? Your brother is in love with your lady's maid, only she has left us. I will release Miss Beck on bail on condition that she remain in the Bridgerton household. I cannot thank both of you enough. I am grateful, but you should not have gone to the trouble. I will not hear of it. Why did you not send word to us? Would the constable not let you? No, I thought perhaps I had done enough to push you all away. You have a great many people who care for you, Sophie. I hope you see that. How long have you known? I found your necklace in my bedroom last night. I was furious when you did not recognize me. I know. The lady in silver, she wore this very same pendant. I never wished to lie to you, I only... I am sorry. I was furious at first, but then I realized it does not matter, Benedict. I could not stand to think of your disappointment upon learning that the woman you searched for all that time would turn out not to be an enchanting young lady, but... me. You have shown me a tremendous amount of love, more than I have felt in a very long time. The very last thing I feel knowing it was you is disappointment. The only other person in my life I was sure loved me was my father. I spent so much of my life feeling alone in a crowded room. He provided nothing for me in his will. Aramid made that very clear. I fell for you at the masquerade because you saw me. Just me. Did you see this will for yourself? No, I did not wish to be further crushed. All this time, you did not believe that I could handle the truth. Perhaps because your love for me is not what I thought it was. It is clear that woman despises you. From the very day she met me. What reason would you have to believe her about your father? I do not know. I simply believed her. Believed that my father would have forgotten me. Believed that the love I felt in my head was made up from the beginning. Believed that I should not expect you to recognize me or love me or commit to me. Sophie, of course I love you. I did not help. I should never have asked you to be my mistress. I am forever sorry. Last night, I came back here for a reason. To ask you the question I should have asked you all along. Do not. I saw my father's will. Well, what is it? Not now. I have my family's blessing, Sophie. He kept his promise. I was in Rosamund myself. I love you. I love you, Benedict. He left us each an equal portion dowry. He loved me. Of course he did. How could anyone not? You are not going to prison. The Dowager Lady Penwood stole your dowry. That makes her a liar and a thief. We will have to find you a dress because you are going to the Queen's Ball tomorrow. Seven long years I spent serving you in my own home. I asked you the day you kicked me out why you kept me so long. And I know now it was never out of any goodness. If you ruin me, I will ruin her. And vice versa. It is simple. We shall all agree to a more mutually beneficial recounting of events. Will you join me? Is what they say true? That you are a relation of the late Earl? I can say with complete conviction, Your Majesty, that I am by birth and by education a daughter of Penwood House. Miss Gumb, may I have your first dance? What are you doing? I desire to dance with my betrothed. You may, Mr Bridgerton. You are rather skilled, even with no music. It is all the more remarkable if you knew who my first dance tutor was. I had so much to overcome. How does it feel to be officially recognized as a Penwood? Strange, but good. It is midnight. Must you flee? Would you mind if I cut it short, then? Because I would very much like to make you a Bridgerton. I can stay as long as you like. I was hoping you might stay forever. Will you marry me? Yes. Sophie. Benedict. Yes, I will. May I kiss your bride?