Routines for Kids at Home

Yes, we are live Hey guys, if this is your first time catching one of my live chats, welcome. Welcome. Welcome. My name is Monica J I'm an early childhood development specialist and a child behavior specialist I love hopping on here on Instagram chatting with you all every week on Tuesday nights at 9 p.m Eastern Standard Time and I love talking about child behavior all kind of topics surrounding child behavior So I want to welcome you to our Tuesday night live chat This is our weekly chat that we have every Tuesday night at 9 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. Hey guys waving back at you Thank You Mitch. Thanks for joining 30 mommy Shabrie. How are you Marlene's here reward us? How are you and first time watching? Welcome Mitch. Thanks so much for being here. Appreciate it, Victoria Davis Gilbert. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome Hey secret Cajun. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. So excited to see all of you here on our Tuesday night live chat now Let me just say this. This is a very special live chat This is not just any weekly live chat that we normally have although we have great conversations every Tuesday night tonight Tonight's live chat is very special because we have our very first Live yes our guest speaker who comes from reward us Marlene. I'm so excited to invite her I'm going to do a little introduction before we get her in here on the live chat first I just want to remind you if you think this broadcast is something that can benefit anyone in your community your audience Definitely share it out All you have to do is tap that little icon down below that looks like a paper airplane and share this broadcast out Share the love share the love tonight's topic We are talking about routines and schedules with Marlene the creator of reward us if you guys have checked out our post from what was that Monday? Actually Monday Monday night's post Monday's post. We are having a giveaway we are in the middle of a giveaway and we are giving away a Routines chart starter kit a kid's routine chart starter kit from reward us and I just can't I mean There's just I'm just so overjoyed and excited that the creator of new wardens is actually joining us tonight So let me do an intro I want to tell you a little bit about Marlene and then she is going to join us right now right here So get your questions wet ready. If you have questions about schedules routines, let's just go for it Let's just go for it because she's amazing and you guys are gonna be impressed like I'm impressed. Okay. Okay, so let's get this started All right, our special guest tonight is Marlene Spence she is a wife and mother of two energetic playful kids that challenge her every day to remain calm and Responsive instead of erratic and reactive. She is also a behavior consultant a parent strategist the creator of reward Um, and the owner of cornerstone family services cornerstone family services shifts parents from feeling overwhelmed and hopeless About their child's behaviors to feeling relieved and hopeful Marlene has recently launched her first product from the reward and product line and is excited to share how parents and educators Can use simple practical and she let's not forget sheep tools to inspire children to grow up to be responsible Independent confident and happy kids you guys I need you to go ahead and welcome Marlene to our live chat Welcome her in the comment section. Hey mommy needs a timeout. Welcome. Hey Barbara. Welcome mom. Hey all about play Tasha Welcome Marlene to our live chat you can welcome her right there in the comment section I am going to ask her to join us now. Here we go Coming on we're waiting for reward ems Marlene from reward ems and I dropped her product. I was trying to hold it Yes, I can hear you that's amazing great great I'm always I'm always worried like okay, we're gonna have tech issues, but no I can hear you. I can see you Hey guys, can you hear me? You see her? Let us know Thanks for joining so that intro that bio I mean you are doing amazing things You know how I feel about you and when I know Absolutely, and when I found you online in store reward ems I was just blown away so excited about these routine charts in schedule these visual schedules for children I was just so happy someone else put it together because I'm like And like you said, it's practical. It's simple Yeah, so I wanted to start by hey busy parents. I wanted to start by asking why why did you create reward ems? Okay, so like you I've been in the field for many many many years yes Yes, and so one of my goal to so working with parents working with families working with educators Whenever I go into a classroom or to a home and you know, they're telling me about all the behavior issues One of my go-to Tools is always a visual schedule. My question to the parent or to the educator is always How does the child know what they're supposed to do? How do they know the expectations without you always having to verbally prompt them themselves? and so I was always making visual schedules and then I was like And then I had my own kids Okay, so I'm gonna put these visual schedules to work in my own home Because again, I realized I was constantly repeating myself. I realized just like it just helped with the structure at home So I was now to make them and I'm sure you've made Yes, so You got a velcro or you have magnets Laminate and you gotta print behind the pictures and you gotta print them out and you know There's some softwares out there, but I just did not like the characters that these software some of them have like these bald heads like Yeah characters just did not represent anybody I knew And and so I was like, you know what there's got to be something out there and so I went searching Sure enough. There was nothing out there I was tired of the clunky boards I was tired of again the velcro and the magnets and I was just like, okay, so Clearly, this is a need I'm done. I'm not gonna like have any more velcro stuck to me I've got a figure this out and again to me. It was really important in order to have an effective visual schedule It's got to be in a place Where your kids will be able to see it and it acts as a reminder and in order for that Yeah, and so I was like I need my schedules to be able to be versatile I need them to be able to go anywhere I need them I need to be able to switch it up and I need it to be easy and so Yeah, that is how everyone began I was just like, okay this is going to be a product line of simple and simple and very practical stuff and my first one is, you know, yes is the visual schedules and I was like this needs to be restrictable. I need to be able to take it off and Rearrange it when the day changes or whatever changes and then again I need to be able to place it in a place where my kids are actually gonna do it and it's actually an actor I think that is one of the number one reasons why I love the product Of course, I use schedules all the time every day, right? I use them with my students, but the fact that they are Usable and that you can peel and stick and peel and stick, you know, as long as you keep them clean It's like it's so practical tactical and it's just it's easy for parents to incorporate and I think that's an important Key that sometimes parents they look at teachers or you know You see what teachers are doing in the classroom and you just assume that that's for the classroom or you can't do that at home So yes, how I mean, how do you let your parents know that? You know what? This is something you can take home Yes, we use it educators use it therapists use it, but this is something you can incorporate at home Are there any like tips that you give families when they're trying to first, you know introduce a product like this? Mm-hmm. Well again, I try to get parents to remember even as we as adults We always everyone writes list right of to-do's the things that I need I need to do and again in the classroom You walk into a classroom. You usually see the classroom times table, right? First period math then gym and it's like okay. So yes, so how do we implement this at home? And again, it's so simple It's just thinking of what are the things that we're asking our kids to do at home, right? And how can we instead of always having to say it? How can we? You know put that up for them so that they know the steps to do Very simple very easily so that now you're just saying hey go check your to-do list, right? It's it's like their to-do list check your list and that's what we're doing. We're gonna be doing today Absolutely. I love it Yeah, I just want to really quickly say for everyone who's joining us right now I know sometimes you guys like writing comments and questions Feel free to do that and I'm going to keep checking so, you know Marlene I might jump in and say oh so-and-so had a question or someone Do you guys think this is something you would use at home, you know, you know put that in the comments What do you think about using visual schedules at home, you know incorporating that into your family's life with your children What do you think? Oh, look at that. Victoria Davis Gilbert says Usually happens my parents normally don't you it's because they find it's not effective and this is typically typically because They usually use those ones that you would find somewhere else where there's a clunky board or it's magnetic And then where do they put it on the fridge or in? right, it's in the kitchen, right and Again, if I want to remind my kid of the stuff that need to do in the morning, it's got to be right in your face It's gonna be Right there. So again with these visual stickers You can so our morning routine, you know, you need to get up brush your teeth wash your face change your clothes You know do all those things. I have that in the bathroom Stuck right on the mirror. So as soon as they go in there, they can see I guess my teeth I did this, right? Okay things I need to do before I go down to have breakfast Awesome, and do you split them up? So let's say you know Like you said you put them in the bathroom or you put them in their bedroom because these are the things you need to do Immediately when you wake up, so do you put those things like in their bedroom or bathroom and then maybe when they come downstairs? There are other things they need to do clean up their plates or whatever after breakfast get their backpack. Do you put those downstairs? Yes, exactly. So they're actually school routine. I have by our kitchen by the I have like the chore list again. Sometimes I move it. Sometimes it's upstairs in between the rooms in the hallway Sometimes I have it downstairs at all Awesome. Okay. I think that is awesome because like you said you need it to be visually like where your child can see it And I see someone in the comments was asking if they can see a sample. So I'm trying to get mine out I know I know Okay, so this As I said, it is our basic starter kit and so there's going to be additional add-ons after this so this is a morning routine bedtime routine and After school routine, this is what this pack will allow you I know everything's kind of backwards, but yes the wording but that's all right. You guys you can see it you get the idea Yeah, and so Love the pictures. I love the pictures. Yeah so again, so rewards is about Visual schedules and reward charts with characters that reflect our diverse kids, right? Yes, and so this is kind of a side note, but I Am thinking of actually having a contest or so these these are my kids. These are my kids right here My kids But I want everyone else's kid in my products as well. So in a few weeks, I think I'm gonna do a contest where We're gonna have everybody else's kids. We're gonna vote to see whose kids are gonna be in the next Cherie from 30 mommy just said I just made schedules for my kids and it's saving my life. Yeah Hey, I'm telling you those schedules. They do wonders. They do one Quick question, is this your son on the packaging or no? They're like I have models for you, oh, I think it's wonderful so I had a question in One of I think our contest our giveaway post that we're doing because we are doing a giveaway with Marlene right now Over in the profile you can go check that out But someone asked the question. Do you think this product is good for teenagers or what age is this? Would you recommend the product for? so When I talk about age, I'm gonna talk about developmental age Okay, there's a difference between your chronological age and your developmental age. So I would say three I do know some parents who have bought it for you know Their older kids are like five and six and their two-year-old is actually thriving with it But I would say he's a really good start Developmentally is three and I think developmentally only because you know If you have a child with developmentally delayed or with special abilities That could be you know, 15 or 16, but developmentally they are let's say five and six and this still would be helpful So I would say between 3 and 12 It's ideal believe it or not, I've had a lot of requests for a High school college edition. I'm sure I'm sure Yeah, so I am definitely gonna do that But this will schedule so visual schedules for teenagers are again 100% helpful you may not I mean they might they might find this a little childish, right? Yeah, yeah, but Definitely, I would still highly recommend visual schedules and maybe you could just do it in a checklist, right? Where you have a list with checkboxes of okay. These are the things that you need to do Maybe it's a dry erase. So every day they can change it up Okay, that's awesome good good to know and now when you said three is a great age to start children So if parents aren't going to introduce scheduled routines like at any age three five when they're introducing it Is there any particular way you would suggest they do that? Is there a conversation is it just you know, everyone's sitting down and looking at them any suggestions on that? Yes, absolutely. So most important if you want to be successful Involve your kid In the process So I've actually saw a lot of feedback that I've gotten back from parents as well as I literally as soon as they even open it out of the package their kids are like So, right right Involve them in the process. So together Think of okay. So in the morning These are the things, you know, I want you to do right and together you you know, you can take off the stickers And and use the parent and say these are the things I want you to do Now you put them in the order of the things, you know of the way that you want to do them in the morning Right, and it's amazing how kids will thrive Once you have been able once you've given them that ability to be able to choose the order of the things sounds so simple It works magic. So and then you gotta think about right. Does it really matter if they you know, sometimes it doesn't matter It doesn't matter if they have breakfast first and then brush your teeth or it doesn't matter, right? So just give them their list of things that they need to do And then tell them and then also ask them where do you think this is gonna act as a good reminder for you? Where do you think I should put them? Right? Sometimes it's gonna be in their bedroom. Sometimes it's going to be You know again in the bathroom. Sometimes it's gonna be instead of the mirror Maybe it's right there on the counter In your bathroom. So again decide with them, you know your after-school routine Where do you think is the best spot that would be and so first? Establish the routines of what you wanted to do and then second figure out together Which locations they're gonna go in and then third is reward them Okay. Oh, that was just the question Kimberly from K. Murray's asking you a question right there. I think you're about to oh Was she asking me How to incorporate a reward system with the visual schedule? Yes Absolutely. Okay, and so especially in the beginning so if they've completed all their tasks in the morning without you having to say a word Then you absolutely want to reward them and I want to remind everybody that Rewards don't necessarily mean you're giving them candy or giving them Right Rewarding is like, oh my gosh, you finished everything on your morning to-do list all by yourself High-five hug. I'm so proud of you, right words of affirmation Let them know that you are becoming so big and independent. I'm so proud of you Look at you right and you would be amazed at how they feel So yes, we have to reward we have to praise We definitely have to let them know that them following routines on their own is a huge accomplishment That's great. Good. I'm glad you hit on that point because that is a question I get all the time from parents should should I reward my child and the rewards they're thinking about is more along the lines of Should they get a toy at the end of the week? You know, if they get candy like you mentioned, so I'm glad you really hit on that point. Yeah Melody from family nugget says you're hitting all the right points. Congratulations on a great product And so now the big question is if parents are consistent with this if they you know introduced their schedule They're consistent with it. Will they see some changes in some behaviors? Has that been something you've seen with some of your students some of the families you work with? Absolutely They are definitely again So they're gonna feel so much more confident because what happens with their kids is again that verbal instructions A lot of our kids we spew off a lot of these things they've heard step one and Done, right? Yeah You know Monica when you go to the store can you get and I listed 20 things you would not remember anything But I With our kids right and so they're now gonna understand what they're what is expected of them get those clear Expectations and then you're gonna see that reduce reduction in anxiety for them, right? So a lot of the times to You know when they're not sure what they're what they're supposed to do. They're confused. They have no idea You know, you said we're gonna go to the park. Why don't we going to the park? They're all anxious about going to the park Or you said I don't want to go to grandma's I'm anxious about going to grandma's. Why don't we going to grandma's? Is a lot of that anxiety in tantrum because now they know when that's gonna be happening in their day they can now Prepare themselves for okay So I know I'm gonna be doing this first before I have play time So that clear expectations are there? You're also going to be able to see An elimination of that. Oh, well, daddy said I could mommy said grandma said I right Once you have your visual schedule and it's up there on your wall and this is the list of expectations There's no need to now go to anybody. There's no need, you know, even if daddy said something or even if mommy said Something your to-do list is there and so, you know follow that and do that. It's so true Tracy takes like Tracy says. Oh, wow, that makes so much sense I don't think we think about the messages we send children and how it heightens their anxiety You're right. Yeah, it's so true even right and even with transitions, right? And so when it comes to things like oops when it comes to them having to you know Leave their preferred activity and having to go to Something else that they don't really like again them being able to see on that schedule Okay, I am gonna have play time again, but it's going to be you know later on I'm gonna have tech time But it's gonna be later on on in the day that really helps them to not fight it so much because they know it's not Going away forever and something I think just like you said like as adults We forget that we're just rattling off things to kids or stuff more We may just not be saying anything because we're just like we got to go We got to get out the door get your bag Get you that and you never even told them what's happening and that for some children. It's like You know, yeah, you know I mean for me sometimes it's like I don't know what's happening You know, I like to know ahead of time if I don't know happening It's it gives me anxiety, you know So, thank you we have to think about that I know sometimes we forget that these little humans actually have these feelings inside They do these emotions and so, you know, yeah. Yeah, we don't want to forget that. Absolutely I'm watching. This is us and You should be off and tell me like I need to go like do something else It's the same way children are playing and we're just like, all right clean it up now Maybe they were in the middle of about to put the top on their masterpiece that they write into their masterpiece And you're like, I don't care clean it up. We got it, you know, but there was no warning There was they never knew what was coming. So right they couldn't prepare themselves, right? And so like you said if you're watching this is us and someone's like I'll turn the TV off that's yeah It's like what what happened? Yeah These are things that happen every single day you guys I want to ask you Do you all have any questions for Marlene? Do you have any questions whether it's about the product or whether it's just about schedules and routines in general Things you're doing at home now or things you plan on doing make sure you ask them down below I'm gonna scroll a little up and just to see if we missed anything Marlene I I'm looking Victoria Davis Gilbert. I see you said earlier. He said so true. My schedule is in the kitchen now It's supposed to be maybe moving it over a little bit Yeah, I love the fact that it looks like you the pictures she's talking about and what else all right Oh Family Nuggets melody for Family Nuggets is a teacher too. And she said I used to make one those like schedules with sticky notes This is great We all we can relate definitely can relate so I wanted to read something that I saw or you're On your website was on your Instagram account about the product But you said that visual schedules help children understand the order and the importance of their daily activities And I also saw that you had mentioned that it's really really helps them with life skills I think that's actually on the packaging. So these schedules can actually prepare children for you know Using these skills, you know for the rest of their life. Yeah something you you know, talk about with parents and families Yeah, absolutely So again things like, you know our time management right things about being just responsible with being able to see something a list of things that have to be done and actually Completing that and so these are skills that they're gonna need now They're gonna need to develop as an adult when they're working. These are the skills that we really need to teach them and so one of my acronyms is You know, our mission at cornerstone is to raise rich kids and that is so our ICH Responsible independent confident and happy kids and so visual schedules help your kids to be 100% more responsible Right. So again now they're not constantly, you know trying to add like what do I do? I'm not sure now They're like, okay. I come in from school. I need to unpack my backpack. I need to do my homework They they just automatically assume that responsibility Definitely more independent. They're no longer again waiting for your every word