Scarlett Johansson ＂Girl with a Pearl Earring＂ C.K. - Dec. 12, 2003

Tonight's first guest has critics buzzing about two Oscar-caliber performances in the past year. Her film, Lost in Translation, is in theaters now, and her new film, Girl with a Pearl Earring, opened in select cities today. No smoke without fire, they say. Is that what you think? No. You're only a maid. What can you do? I must get back. Don't walk away. Listen to me. Just remember who you are. Don't get caught up in his world. I am only a maid. But I would never give in to Master Van Rifen. I wasn't talking about Van Rifen. Here she is, Scarlett Johansson. So, a lot of questions. Thank you. A lot of questions. First of all, I like what you're wearing. I think it's very cool. I noticed a couple things. The jacket's very stylish. Thank you, thank you. And then I noticed the torn, the strategically torn jeans. Yeah, right. But the very happening shoes. You know what I'm saying? I feel happening. Yeah, you're making a statement there. What about, some people have called you the most important actress in the last 25 years. That was me. Was that good or what? Wasn't that exciting? That's something to live up to. What did that mean? Was it exciting to hear that? I just like the close-up of your face. It was scary, I know. It was good, it was good. So what do you do? Are you filming right now, something? I am. I'm shooting in Italy right now. As we speak. Right now. But you're flying like crazy then, right? I'm flying like a crazy person. I'm so busy that the most exciting time for me... I've been here ever since Monday and people keep saying, you're so exhausted, you're overworking yourself. Don't worry, you'll have that nine hours on the plane. This was since Monday, so I'm waiting for the nine hours. I can finally get a wink of sleep. So you've been operating on five or six hours of sleep a night or what? Oh, that'd be nice. I would be so cranky if I don't get my eight, eight and a half hours. I'm nothing. I melt. I'm terribly cranky actually, but I'm putting on a brave face for you. So are you able to sleep on an airplane? Can you actually do that? I do sleep on an airplane, except the problem is when you're sleeping, they don't like to disturb you. You sleep and you sleep and you sleep. You wake up and you get so dehydrated that you wake up with bladder infections and sinus infections and all kinds of awful things. I know you're dehydrated. I don't know about the bladder infections, but that's a nice way of telling the story. But no, you shrivel up. You get dehydrated on an airplane. You get dehydrated and you catch everybody. There's nothing better when you hear somebody's bronchial cough in the back row. That's also true. They recirculate the air. It's the same air from the guy back in, I guess, Coach? Is that what it's called? I'm just kidding. I'm joking. Oh, Lord. Soft. So soft. But I can't sleep on airplanes and I'm envious of you because I'm 6'10". I just can't. I can't. I'm so tall and I can't. But you could probably just curl up there. Yeah, I just curl up into a little ball and fall asleep. Just pop a couple Ambien and I'm all good. How is the media treating you now after loss in translation? That's kind of your breakout movie, right? Yeah. It's well. Everything is very goodly. I'm happy. But some of them act like that's your first movie ever. Yeah. Well, it is, actually. Is it? No. It's been about 11 years. But it's nice. It's fine. Basically, the other day somebody came up to me and said, This is your breakout film. It's the first film you've ever done. How exciting for you to be in Hollywood. And the rage, for whatever reason, I started to get really angry. Like, don't you know who I am? In some awful way. And it just killed her with my kindness. I said, yes. Well, it is my very first film. I'm excited to be in Hollywood. So how long have you been doing it? For 11 years, acting? Yes. 11 years. And you're like 19 now? I just turned 19. Just turned 19 years old. Yeah. You know that famous expression, it takes 10 years to become an overnight sensation in Hollywood? Wow. I just made it. You just made it. Yeah, that's great. One year. So they tell me while you're filming now in Italy, there's something that you're really missing over here in the States. What, Special K? Yeah. The cereal? The cereal. Yeah. Special K, the cereal. Why'd you say the cereal? Why'd you hesitate on the cereal, the cereal? Yeah, the cereal. As opposed to the club drug. Yeah, the cereal. Oh, okay. I didn't know. You gotta get in with the times. I just know a couple guys in college that my nickname was Special K. Isn't that lame? It's so embarrassing. So I thought it was more than just Special K. I thought it was American breakfast cereals. Well, I mean, they have certain kinds of cereal there. Like they have muesli and granola and all these awful, you know, sort of grainy, healthy kinds. Like no Frosted Flakes or Lucky Charms or Cocoa Puffs, the stuff you really crave in the morning. Or at least I do anyway. Yeah. But, you know, I found this new cereal, Special K. Well, I guess it's not that new. That's been around more than 11 years, actually. It's been around. It's been around before you were born. Special K. I'm not in with the times. You know, we used to, my writers and I, we killed time in the office, and I did a thing once. What's the most overrated cereal? And we had Special K and I think we had Corn Flakes. And we had the most underrated, which was Grape Nuts. Does that? I prefer Raisin Bran. I'm not big on Grape Nuts, actually. It's a little too crunchy for me. But I do like Special K, the cereal. And I like to, you have to make sure you have. You know why they're laughing? Because we're going to go five minutes on breakfast cereal. And everyone's like, we're actually killing time on this. You're intense on breakfast cereal. Well, I like to, you have to make sure you have the right ratio of milk. Like you have to just see the milk sort of in the cereal. Now, I am not, I'm going to run with this because I'll tell you something. My brother is intense about breakfast cereal, okay? And you're as intense as he is. And my question is, do you drink it, or drink it, do you eat it for more than just breakfast? Do you have it for lunch and dinner? Yes, especially in Italy because they have pasta, like so much pasta. And there's only so much pasta you can eat. So now I substitute like Spaghetti Carbonara with a bowl of Corn Flakes. Oh, that's great. Yeah, it's spectacular. Back to the milk ratio because I think this is true for both Raisin Bran and shredded wheat. You have to have the proper amount of milk to soak in there. Not too much, not too little. It sort of lubricates the cereal. I was looking for, I was looking for the word lubricate, and you came up with it. I can't believe we're, I can't believe we're talking about breakfast cereal. Let's talk, when we come back, we're going to talk about English muffins with Scarlett Johansson and Five Questions. Stay with us. So what do you think of this Oscar stuff, all this Oscar talk? They say you're a shoo-in. Oh, really? Yeah, to be nominated. Oh, I don't know. I plan on eating cereal with my dad that night, so. Really? Okay, we've gone a little too far with the cereal. Oh, sorry, sorry. Did I say cereal? Yeah, I don't know. I mean, it's, you know, it's kind of unbelievable. Yeah. What's this, the girl with the earring, the pearl earring? Mm-hmm. I love butchering titles. But how is that? Is that a good, that's out today, right? It's out today. I mean, I'm proud of it. You know, we worked really hard and in very cold, awful conditions. In Luxembourg? Luxembourg. The smallest, one of the smallest countries in the world. Yeah, well, it's quite charming, actually. Yeah. I mean, it's very cosmopolitan. Mm-hmm. Like, you can go there and you can, you know, shop at Cartier and eat at McDonald's, which is what I did a lot of it. Something a lot of it, yeah. Yeah. You've got to come down after the jewelry, just have some fries after you buy that stuff. Well, after you spend, like, such a large amount of money, you've got to, you've just got to have a Big Mac just to bring yourself back down to Earth. Back down to Earth. So, the girl with the pearl earring is, it is about jewelry. And in fact, you in your real life are a little crazed with piercings in the ear and everything. Well, no. I mean, yeah, I went through a sort of body piercing phase. I was kind of, you know, I was sort of into it. Beyond the ears? Yeah, I had a couple of facial piercings. Yeah. You know, but I don't know. All right. But to each his own, I guess. And how long did that phase last? About three weeks. That's good. Get rid of that in a hurry. We don't need any more of that. Where was it? The little nostril? Yeah, I had my nose pierced. My eyebrow pierced. My stomach pierced. But I was into it. I don't know if I'm quite over it. You know, I mean, getting a piercing is not like buying an expensive pair of shoes. Like, you don't really think about it that long. You just kind of wake up one morning and say, I have to get my septum pierced. And then you go and do it. Yeah, yeah. It's very intense. Now, your father, you bought, you're from New York City, correct? Yes. And now you have a place. You bought a place in LA. Yeah, I bought an apartment here. My dad is an architect and a contractor. Yeah. And he's redoing it. But he's living there while he's redoing it, which is... That's fine. Yeah, except for I'm afraid he's going to get some kind of asbestos poisoning or something. Oh, he's breathing in all the... Yeah. Well, yeah, I bought him an air mattress, you know, and he keeps, like, moving it around. And he just tells me, he's like, you know, I just vacuum off a little corner and plop the bed down. And I'm thinking, like, my poor father, he's just, you know, his sinuses have about had it. Boy, it's either flying or it's working at your apartment. You're very worried about your sinuses. That's great. You were here last time. You never played five questions before, did you? No. This is your first time? Yeah. Are you apprehensive? Are you excited? Yes, because every time I see any guest on your show play five questions, and they always look like they didn't graduate from junior high school or something. So I'm nervous. Well, let's just preface it by saying Scarlett Johansson has graduated from junior high school. So... Right? We have time for five questions. Now, we start with geography, and some people dread geography. We have a new type of geography. This is the shape of a state. I can show her the front. What? Which way? There you go. Like this? This would be the border, right? This would be the border. See, I thought it was like this. This is how I thought it was until somebody, I won't say who, corrected me. Because I know what state's over here. Okay, go ahead. Um... That was embarrassing. That was like Dan Quayle with the E. Come on. Um, it's somewhere in the west. Yes. Um, it's Idaho? Yes, that is correct. It's Idaho. We've got the Montana over here. Don't ever do that again. Spell your last name backwards, please. Oh, oh my God. Hold on. Okay, N-O-S-S-N-A-H-O-J? That is correct, ladies and gentlemen. Right there. Oh, this is rapid fire. Ten seconds on the clock. Oh, no. Besides loss and translation, name five Bill Murray movies in ten seconds. Tell me when you're ready. Take your time. You ready? Wait, hold on. Okay. Go. Stripes, What About Bob, Rushmore, The Royal Tenenbaums, and, um... Caddyshack. Hold on. No, wait. No, no. Groundhog Day. Yes. You're great. That was wonderful. She was... Someone was trying to help her from the audience, and she didn't want the help. No, no. All right. This is a tough one. They didn't get it yesterday. Who didn't... Sagat didn't get it. Don't say it out loud. Think of a... Crowd showed up. Think of a Christmas song. Don't say it out loud. Think of a Christmas song. Okay. Do you have it? Yeah. Now think of another one. Okay. Do you have the other one? Yes. What is it? Jingle Bells. Oh, my Lord! Yes, or Silent Night. Jingle Bells or Silent Night. That is correct. Wow. Congratulations. I'm so proud. How many tries will it take you to throw this holiday fruitcake into the garbage can? It's not the traditional circle fruitcake. It's more of a log. How many tries? There's the can. I'll give my... If I get it in the first try and I guess it wrong, do I still get points? Oh, that's... No, no. Yes. If you say three tries, you get your first one. That's fine. How many tries... The goal is to get it in there. How many tries do you think it'll take? Three? Three's a great... Yeah. Okay. You got to retrieve it, okay? Okay. Wait. Hold on. You're going left... Why are you going left-handed? Because I'm left-handed. Okay. All right. Wait. Hold on. No. I'm terrible at sports. All right. Girl with a Pearl Earring opened today in select cities, and Lost in Translation is out. Great to meet you. Good luck with everything. Nice to meet you, too. We're going to talk about voting.