Success is hard until you have a mindset like this: The Alysa Liu Effect

I love struggling, actually. It makes me feel alive. Gold medalist. Alyssa Liu. Alyssa Liu, everybody! What is there to lose? Throw everything you think you know about success out the window. Forcing yourself to be disciplined, sacrificing health, being anxious about the results of that promotion, that grade, that college acceptance, that competition, anything. The foundation for true success is the opposite of all of that. If you've been on my channel, you'll know that I believe in holistic success, and there's no better person that proves this than Alyssa Liu. She won not just one, but two Olympic gold medals just a few weeks ago. She did this all while being extremely carefree. No pressure at all, even though she was on one of the greatest stages in the world. She was healthy, and now she is absolutely loved and adored by millions of people all around the world who, before her, have never watched figure skating in their lives. And all this is not because of how she presents herself. It's who she is and how she lives. Alyssa has been a huge inspiration to me as well, which is why I've been obsessed with watching her interviews and her skating. So today, we're going to go over the four things that make Alyssa both magnetic and successful. And these are all things that you can start doing today. Let's go. First, you've got to know her insane story. She started skating when she was just five years old, and then at age 13, she became the youngest U.S. national champion ever. Just three years later, at age 16, she went to the Beijing Olympics, where she won a bronze medal. However, despite all that success, being called a child prodigy, even being on Jimmy Falun, right after, Alyssa retired, saying it was due to burnout. Alyssa planned to never return to skating ever again because she felt that her childhood had just been a blur of 11 years of just going to the rink and competing. She no longer enjoyed it, and she wanted to see what it felt like to be a normal teenager and to spend more time with her family. So Alyssa having conviction in this choice, she stepped away for two years. In that time period, she did things like attending UCLA and hiking to Everest Base Camp. Then in early 2024, she went skiing for the first time. Going down the slopes, she got an adrenaline rush, and she realized that this feeling was something she hasn't felt in such a long time. And actually, this feeling was something she used to get in skating. So she decided to get back on the ice to see how it felt. She absolutely fell in love with the sport all over again, and even more than when she started skating as a kid. Obviously, a ton of work and effort was put into Alyssa finally winning the gold medals and even going to the Olympics in general. But this love and passion for the sport is ultimately what led her to do this insane thing, since not only did she break the drought where no American women figure skater has gotten a gold medal in 20 years, but what's crazier is that this figure skating is a sport where it seems like you just absolutely have to give your all at any point, especially your youth. The fact that she quit, then came back after two years is almost unheard of. And not only that, but she conquered. This goes into point one. She equates winning as doing the thing itself. Because she left due to burnout and no longer loving the sport, she showed that doing the sport itself has to be something that she enjoys. Often, we might feel pressure of taking that prestigious job or working really hard at something out of other people's expectations or simply to achieve the thing itself, rather than asking, wait, do we actually enjoy this process? Alyssa also could have considered the skating achievements as a reason for her to keep going, but she didn't. These are just materialistics, you know? The real prize is in the performance, I would say, and the journey, and that goes for everybody that was out there skating. When someone loves doing the thing, like skating so much that they are happy to get back on the ice over and over and over again and to spin and fall and spin and fall over and over again, there's absolutely no way to beat them. They have joy in the thing itself, so they could literally be doing this activity that gets them better and better indefinitely. That's why across the board, whether you talk to successful entrepreneurs or even in this book, Talk Like Ted, one of the most important factors to success is passion. And it's a win-win because when winning is doing the thing itself, you don't feel so much pressure about the actual gold medal that people are all thinking about. I'm fine with any outcome as long as I'm out there, and I am, so there's nothing to lose. Alyssa knows that not only her, but anyone going out on the ice and skating their program to the best of their ability means that they won. Now you might say, Amy, well, in some competitions or sports, there are strict rules or standards that actually create inevitable pressure. That leads us into point number two, Alyssa chooses herself. Before she quit skating, her coaches decided on her program, which means they decided on the music she skated to, her outfits, they even told her what to eat. Historically, there's a lot of emphasis in women's figure skating to both be as tiny and as slender as possible. Now, when Alyssa came back to skating, she wanted to make sure that it was on her own terms. She completely reformed her skating team, redefined the role of her dad in her involvement of her skating. She chose her own music, even though some people might say it's unconventional. She collaborated on her choreography. She picked her own outfits and she chose her own training schedule based on what she felt was the right amount for her. If I feel like I'm skating too much, I'll back down. If I feel like I'm not skating enough, I'll ramp it up. And almost most importantly, she put her health, both mental and physical above all. No one's gonna starve me, tell me to eat. Really, Alyssa just unapologetically advocates for herself and does what she wants, because if it's not what she wants, that's not really winning. If she was not skating to the music that resonated with her soul, not wearing the outfit that makes her feel her best, she likely would have had, quote unquote, less discipline in practicing those songs that she doesn't like. She would have had less joy in performing those programs. And even if she won a medal from that program she doesn't like, she probably wouldn't feel as good about it. And here, the interesting thing that I forgot to mention in point one is that when you have passion and love and you're doing what you want, there's no need for discipline in the conventional terms. Discipline just means you have clarity on what you want. And when you have passion for something, it's like, why wouldn't you work toward it? You don't need somebody pushing you. No, I have my own determination. Alyssa made it her ice in her stage. And she even tells other people in her interviews, Guys, do whatever you want with your hair. I love Alyssa setting this great example for anyone, not just young women, because we have so many pressures of like, oh, looking perfect, you know, being fit, and then being smart. And then when you're into adulthood, like taking care of the household and then also making money. And so often what I felt for myself as well is that we actually place ourselves as the last priority. Like self-care becomes an afterthought for only if we have time. You might want to please everyone so much that you work hard into the late hours and sacrifice your sleep. Or you don't eat the healthiest things because, well, that fast food is just faster. So then I can get to the next place where I feel obligation to do this for my friend or to work hard to succeed in this way to please my parents. Instead of health being the reward, health is the vehicle in which to get where you want to be. Number three, Alyssa has this very rare trait, which is she is present. Firstly, in practice, rather than resenting the struggle or being stressed out about it, the struggle itself in the moment makes her feel alive. I love struggling. It makes me feel alive. Then in both practices and performances, she is so joyful and just literally having fun on ice. So you can't take your eyes away from her. She is so in the moment that, you know, she is making the most of her life right now. And because of this presence, she's also not thinking about the scores. I did not think I won. And as for scores, I don't exactly remember how they worked. I know that for me, before I do anything that seems like it has high stakes, like playing a basketball game or giving a talk, playing for a piano recital, like I did when I was a kid, I would feel anxiety. And this pressure and anxiousness is something very common that probably most of us experience. And anxiety is defined as apprehension, tension, or uneasiness that stems from the anticipation of danger. Many interviewers have asked Alyssa, why are you not anxious? That's because she doesn't even think about the future. She knows that the current moment is the one that's most important and to focus on that. Since Alyssa just loves life, she's a happy, wonderful person to be around. Even in a sport where it's an individual sport and you compete against other people, she is known for her genuine warmth and joy on and off the ice, not just her technical perfection. Like just watch this adorable clip of Alyssa literally lifting one of her competitors up. This authentic and positive energy is not only contagious, but it fuels both sides. So then her teammates and the crowd and even her competitors are also cheering her on. And it just further amplifies not only her ability to perform, but the entire overall success of the moment. In my experience, also growing up in an Asian immigrant household, we're told to be humble. And if we earn an award to just like meekly accept it, like, oh, thank you. But look at this picture. This is one of my favorite pictures from the entire Olympics. Alyssa is just unapologetically celebrating herself as she should, as women should. When you trust in yourself and you celebrate your little wins, that confidence and that trust in yourself will compound. And finally, number four, Alyssa is a performer, but she's not performative. When Alyssa skates, you can tell that she's performing for the performance itself, not for the audience's reactions. This is another factor that lets her take the pressure off herself and actually perform better. Every second you're there, you're gaining something. There's nothing to be lost. You know what I'm saying? Like nothing to complain about. I can't think of anything that stressful or anything that could bring me down. Because she loves the art and beauty of skating, which is her craft, you can tell that the joy she displays on the ice is not for the judges. She is just happy and that's just who she is. So if you want to do something well, you need to want and enjoy doing that, even if no one is watching, even if there's no prize at the end. And the foundation to even get that in the first place is like what I was saying in the first few steps about choosing something you genuinely like doing, even though obviously I'm not nearly as cool as Alyssa. I had a very similar experience last year in 2025 when I pulled up a camera and I just could not for the life of me film well. A video that used to take me 30 minutes to film took me like an hour and a half and I was just stumbling and feeling so bad about myself after. So I took about like two months break from filming and posting videos in general, which if you don't know for a lot of creators, that's considered like algorithm suicide. But I did it anyway. And then right toward the end, when I haven't been making content for a while, I felt this itch to pull up the camera and then speak again. And I was like, whoa, silly me for not thinking that this was a solution to my block. It was the whole reason why I started filming and making YouTube videos in the first place. It was to be that performer in sharing my message with the world, not being performative. Funny enough, when you start to get some success or the numbers of your subscribers start ticking up, you put more and more emphasis on the people and doing it for them. Like, oh, I have to make the next video good. So it takes advantage of my momentum and blah, blah, blah. And then you lose yourself more and more and more, which makes you worse and worse and worse at the thing that gave you the initial success. What's also really impressive about Alyssa not being performative is even in interviews or the many, many times when she's on camera, even if she is and she's good at hiding it, she doesn't really seem like she's trying to manage her image. She is just answering the questions. Cartwheel just before you took the ice. What's up with that? Where'd that come from? I mean, I love cartwheels and there was so much space there, you know what I'm saying? And I saw the opportunity, so I took it. Nowadays, there are so many videos like how to rebrand yourself, how to make yourself the best brand. But what Alyssa shows and what I believe is that the best brand is when you're simply showing who you are as a person. Like Alyssa isn't a persona, it's just who she is. That is why she's magnetic and that is what people respond to because even if you're not giving very obvious signs of being performative, I'm using that word a lot, people can feel it in their gut. But when you are performing just to show who you are and your love and your craft, that's when people get pulled in. Now, you might have thought the theme of this video was how to get success and be happy while getting it. But success is happiness. If you are happy, automatically you're successful because at the end of the day in our very short yet long but precious lives, the medals you get, the followers on Instagram, the luxury products you buy, those don't come with you and they don't really matter to your quality of life. But what does and what really shows that you led a successful life and a fulfilling and meaningful and a worthwhile life? When you are happy, the time on this earth, as long as it was maximizing that joy and that happiness, that is success. And as a great side effect, it will then also make you beautiful inside and out. And that is why Alyssa is so beautiful. She's always happy. She's just radiating joy. She's like an angel, right? Like I'm complimenting her a lot now. But I and the rest of the world are all just like, dang, we really needed this. We needed something like her to heal, you know? Hope you liked this video. Remember that the foundation is the attitude that Alyssa Liu has showed us. But of course, if you want to learn some tips to help you make things easier, like how to make better friends, how to do time management and how to not have as much self-doubt, I made a free seven-day newsletter series that you can check out down below. Thank you so much. And leave your favorite figure skating or snow Olympics emojis down below if you like this video. Make sure to like and subscribe.