Cursed Memes For Broken Humor

There are rumors. Very well, Posi-Pi, Nega-Pi, you will support the Magneti of Alisa. Posi, Nega, Nega-Pi, Nega, Nega. Put those cellphones high in the sky for Cardi B right now. Before we do that, Ray G, I'm gonna let production know that you're getting fired today. I'm gonna come. Do not come. Should I do it? Do not come. I'm gonna do it. You know why black people are taller? Why? Because they're negroes. You know, I dislike sexual assault as much as the next guy. That's some bad stuff. Rape? Boo. Don't like it. But... Two sweet teas and what else? A hundred dicks. A hundred what? Dicks. Two sweet teas. What else can I get for you, sir? A hundred dicks. So I took out two loans to get here today. I don't even have money for a hotel. Slept in my car. Give him a big hand, guys. Homeless dude. Motion Kleenex. Incognito mode. These are the ingredients to create the perfect night at home. Until Professor Utodium accidentally introduced Cast to Family Room TV. The day I bought an iPhone, no one talked to me. I swear to God, I had a nightmare when I was a kid. I was 8 years old. I was 150. I had a nightmare. I swear to God, I had a nightmare. What is this? I was sexually abused as a child. You know, I mean, that's not an easy thing. You must have been an attractive young gentleman. What? You know, I'm gonna leave you with one last thing because we have to hop up, but... They really make you feel welcome here. Just wash your cheeks. If crime was legal for a day, what would you do? Get a BBL. I just wanted to see if I had one. If crime was legal for a day, not if you could be gay. What would I do? If crime was legal for a day... No, no, no, let's stop. I've never heard of a deer calling competition. Leave it to our German friends to give it a go. I don't think I've ever heard of... Oh! Oh, no! Ken! Well, now, that'll... Did you say gate 67? Gate 67. You see the shoes. You see the money. You see the shoes, you see the money. Is this Friends? Look at this. We have real light out there and real air, but we're using air-conditioned and artificial light. That's just retarded! And I'm sorry. Stifler, ask everyone to rate their own love songs. Scale of 1 to 10. Can't pick 7. Your answer? 8. I rate myself a 10, but most guys would rate me, like, between a 7 or a 9. I just want to go home. And they were screaming, get down. I didn't get down. It was ******* awesome. I literally took every minute of it in, and it was a pretty crazy, unique experience. And I'll finish with a quote from my late father. You're not what you look like in your picture. Let's get this over with. I wonder which one of us is the murderer. Hey, did you see a hand come down here? Nope. Sorry, mate. There you go. Nice piece. Welcome. Next! Come through. Welcome. This is my offer, Mr. Morgan. Bring in Vanderlyn, and you have my word you won't swing. Well, I ain't gonna swing anyways, Agent... Milton. You see, I have over 50 million power in Rise of King... Again, nothing on the internet ever really seems to die. It just gets transformed into something else. I mean, one question that I have, because I really don't know the answer to it, is are we ever going to see a meme again that lasts as long as something like the troll face? Oh my god, he killed the bus driver! Oh no, he killed the... They killed the battle bus, man. I was standing on stage, and I was really excited because I had just won the award, and then I was really excited because Kanye West was on the stage. Are there any hard feelings towards him? I don't know him, and I've never met him, so... So were you a fan before? Yeah. It's Kanye West. Stop acting like that. I'm sorry. I apologize. Yes. I love you. So can you stop being mad at me? Do you love me too? Show me. Stop being mad. I'll be right back. This one's easy! Okay, what am I? I'm being serious, like, what am I to you? No, like, what am I to you? No, I'm not how I treat you. No, but like, the way that I... You beat me up. What is my relation to you? You're my brother. Yes, I am, but what else? You're my brother and my boyfriend. On behalf of all black people from all over the world, we would like to give President Trump, the greatest president of all time, our most valuable Nigga Pass. With this Nigga Pass, he can say the N-word as many times as he wants, anytime he wants. Thank you very much, and have a nice day. There's a couple rumors that I've heard about you. I'm going to rattle them off. You tell me true or false, okay? I heard that you have two cell phones. I have three. Well, my brother has two iPads, and I have a phone. And I have two Nintendo Switches. You have a scale? What? Good answer. And, uh... Good answer. And, uh... I have a Nintendo Switch. Do you have it? That don't mean nothing. I have no idea what that object is. I ain't killed nobody. The name of the album is I Killed Darnell Simmons. He's free to go. I appreciate it. I'm sorry, I'm out. I appreciate it. I'm out. I'll make you an offer. I'll give you the $300,000. I appreciate it. That's my deal. Thank you. You don't have to take it, Kobe. I appreciate it. That's $15,000. Thank you. I'll make a decision. I understand. That's my deal. I appreciate it. Thank you, Kobe. Thank you. Hey, good luck.