The Truth About Age Gaps in Thailand What Thai Women Actually Think

We got a comment and somebody wrote no matter how nice you both seem it's ridiculous. A 33 year old woman and a 73 year old man the only reason is money and lifestyle. You know it's true and it's sickening. That is one of the more direct comments we received and yeah it is not easy to hear and honestly it reflects probably what many people think. But the question is are they right or are we missing something? A lot of people see the age gap as especially in Thailand and it feels like they already understand the situation and to be fair sometimes they are not completely wrong. There are relationships which are based on money and there are situations where it doesn't feel right. But when everything gets reduced to just that you miss what's actually going on in a lot of these relationships. Because here in Thailand the way people think about relationships especially age, stability and responsibility can be very different. So instead of me trying to explain this let me ask Ma'am. Welcome to Thailand lifestyle. We are Ma'am and Oden. We take a deeper look at life in real Thailand. Today we are here at the Mekong river. We are on a little trip in the northeast. So this is the most northern point of Islam. The mountains you see over there maybe a little bit maybe not I don't know the camera will show it across the Mekong is Lao. And the Mekong makes this bend here and this is the most northern point. And we will show you throughout the video a few more scenes about the mighty Mekong river. When Thai people see a relationship with a huge age gap what do they really think? For Thai people it's not strange because you can see many times about this. Because people think it's not about age but think it's the kind of person he is must import. That's interesting because where I come from people look at the age gap and they judge already. So is age important or is something else more important? It is not important for me because have nothing else more important. Response, finance, love, relationship and have many because you want to choose one to stay with you long. It's not about age but you need to have around and you need to know what the people is need to stay next to you. And that thing is important. That he is stable, that he responsible is much more important than being young. This is much different to what I come from. In our society to be young to be exciting the fun part is much more important than the stability and the character of the person. What does the role of the Thai family play in all this? Family in Thailand is important because you need to show what the family can see the people next to you. Like mom can see is safe, stability or and trust the older people more than younger people. And this thing is important from the family in the Thai family is can see. That is something people from outside Thailand don't really consider that the family has an influence here. For them the stability, for them that the daughter is safe is much more important than the age or anything around it or the looks as a matter of fact. You see also many guys with very big body and you know they think oh how come he got such a beautiful lady. But they don't look at how he looks like. He looks is he a kind person? Is he a good person? Is he a stable person? Does he take care of the family or not? A lot of people say it is just about money. What do you say to this? Money is a part of a life but not at all. Because is money is for support or help and then is main thing is not about money but about emotional love or relationship and have a most thing is the respect people and that's important. I think this is where a lot misunderstanding comes from because in western countries people don't like to talk about money. It is uncomfortable to talk about money. Is there also some cultural aspect in the roles of relationships? In Thailand is called Phu Yai. You mean is adult but Phu Yai have like you can trust more, can believe and considering and have thing more than young people can balance all everything more than younger people and Phu Yai have two meaning. The one is older than you and the one is same you but have more idea bigger than you and this one and then Phu Yai for relationship people trust more than young people because you have experience about this because can call Phu Yai by age and this thing is for for thing about Phu Yai or in relationship is can trust more than young people. This means like people in the village which forward the culture which forward the village not the ones who drink and gamble. These are the one who are highly respected. Yes or people like grandfather grandmother like this in your family is government Phu Yai the same. Okay so there is also like an elder council in the city? Yes have because have some some people like leader from culture to do this do that and we are believe because he have experience he do many time what about this and believe and teach people for believe the culture what it have not missing and that time. And this is why Thai people honor older people and respect all the people. Yeah. Okay and this is why maybe younger lady also feels happy with an older man because he is like the university of life for her. Yeah. He's also a teacher not only the partner also somebody to look up to. Like need to learn all the time. Yes and respect what he is saying. Yes. From the outside this looks like a power imbalance but from the way you describe it it is like a shared role that the older one is respected as a leader and the younger one brings the energy and which often influences also the decisions. Some people say that the younger ladies are taken advantage of. How do Thai ladies think about that? I think people discuss by self and choose by self. Nobody is fought to do that and then is woman is think about careful about this and then is looking for the people is stability and safe but actually is not like a victim. Okay. So you think they look for the man which can give to them what they need. Yes. And they are not a victim. Yes. Okay. Yeah. That might surprise some western people because they automatically assume that the younger person remains passive but they do actually choose. Why do you think that these type of relationships are misunderstood so often? Because different first different culture and different value because it's western look romantic love more than money more than nothing else but in Thailand you cannot do that. Love you come from responsibility. Love you come from safe. Love you come from many things to be together. Western people just shop too fast. So it's not really about what is right or wrong. People look at the same thing through a different lens. It is more like do we see it out of the correct perspective? Are we also putting in the background of the people the culture and how they think or feel about it? And in Thailand this is very different to the western countries. I know because I'm from a western country and I also used to judge very fast about this but with experience I changed my mind because what looks like money only to one person looks like security for another person. What looks like power imbalance might look like stability and trust from the inside and of course relationships are not the same. There are good relationships and bad relationships everywhere in this world. Also here in Thailand and it is your choice to look who you put next to you. All I can say for us this is real but we are curious to know how you see it. Let us know in the comments below. Do you think people judge age gaps relationships too quick or do you think that those concerns are actually valid? Let us know in the comments. I really would like to see a different perspective.