‘Hacks’ Stars Meg Stalter And Paul W. Downs: The Pizza Interview | NYT Cooking

Are we allowed to eat the figs? The great lady is saying we can. Are we allowed to put our hand in a bowl of cheese and get a big hunk of cheese and eat that? Can't wait to get the parmesan. Have you ever made a pizza before? Yes, we've both made pizza. Actually, my sister is a pizzaiola, so I have actually seen a lot of pizza being made because she's an actual professional. What all do you do to get to be an aiola? She studied the Neapolitan method of making pizza. If I was a pizzaiola, I'd be like, pizza, pizza, come on! Oh, you want to sit on the couch? You've got to move that pizza first. Oh wow, it's on your couch. This is your guest room, but there's a pizza on your bed. I've got to move it. What's your favorite pizza place? There is a pizza that I don't want to say. You don't? Sort of a Midwest pizza, but we do have it. You can say it. Jet's Pizza is kind of good. I've never had it at Jet's. They have a BLT pizza with mayonnaise and lettuce on the pizza. Wow. This is probably controversial. Goop pizza is really good. Is it controversial that I'm eating it every other day, Paul? Okay, no. Do you like to cook? I love to cook for people that I love. I'm Paul W. Downs. I'm Meg Stelter. And we're here with New York Times Cooking, and we're going to be making... Pizzas. Pizza, pizza. Oh, it's so cute. You can't use that because it's a brand. It's the tone you're saying it in that makes it the brand. Pizza, pizza. And now you're doing even more. Pizza, pizza, pizza, that's all you talk about. Do you have a pizza game plan? I mean, there's lobster. I might actually try it. Yeah, go ahead. I'm going to try some lobster. Your lobsters are very smart, though. Don't say that as I eat it. There's a fly on the parmesan, which means it's a good one. But they are... That's true. You know a good parmesan if a fly is attracted to it. I have kind of like a classic pizza. I'm probably going to go pepperoni. I might do caramelized onions. This is Mrs. Table. It's a Bronzino. Maybe I might get a piece of that. Do you want some? No, it's okay. I picked up a very big piece. My game plan is one side to be sweet and one side to be salty. Mmm. I love that. What's also funny is that I don't wash my hands. I just start making the pizza right after touching the fish. Oh! I was really thinking about the flavor. Mmm. Of your pizza? Yeah, because I have fish hands. Mmm. Oh, well. Who cares? Have you ever cooked for each other? I actually feel like I've tried to bring you loads of treats, and you said something like, I don't trust it. I don't know where your hands have been. I don't know where your kitchen is. I don't know where your hands have been. Sorry. Oh! It's okay. Adding a little flavor to the pizza. Having a little cough fest. What do you think, assistant? Think about this. I think she'd be proud we're trying here. Yeah. What's your favorite thing to cook? I like cooking breakfast. I'll take a leftover, and I'll make an egg invention with a leftover. If you made a big old lasagna, what day are you not eating it? Oh, after 30 days, you have to not eat the lasagna. 30 days is like, yeah. But I think up to 30 days is fine. 31. Yeah, it's gotta be within the month. Yours is looking more normal than mine. No, no. What is normal? I guess the pizza gene runs in your family. Well, I used to make pizza, actually, as a kid with my grandmother. Oh, that's so sweet. Yeah, don't be sad. She's still with us. She turns 100 in August. Well, I met her. I know. She actually is an extra in Hacks episode 9. Well, I actually didn't really get to meet her until I was starstruck. Oh, by her? Yeah, I kept looking at her like, there she is. There she is. I know. It was cool. How did yours get so thick and nice and then also awesome? Yours looks good. Okay, time for the sauce then. Have you ever worked in the food service industry? Yes, I was a waiter at Tavern on the Green where I had to wear a tuxedo in 100 degree heat. That's so sweet, a tuxedo. I was a junior waiter, so I had to wear a lime green tuxedo. I worked at two places. One is Friendly's. I was really bad at having any more than one table. Everybody, if I had one table, yes. Oh, yeah. How you doing tonight? We're going out to this. Yeah, I wish I could come with you. Oh, yeah. I'm going to sit down and have a drink. And then two tables, it's like, help me. Help me, chef, chef, chef. Where's the meal? Oh, I didn't put it in. Wow. Yeah, and then I also worked at Panera Bread, and they only let me bus tables. They didn't let me be the cash register person or the soup pourer. I don't even think that's a job. Everyone's allowed to usually do all the things, and I was only allowed to bus tables. I think you would be an amazing waiter to have at a restaurant. Well, I don't have a job now, so I guess maybe I'll do that. Since you decided to end our show. Yeah, but, you know, I can't be responsible for your unemployment, you know? Table's up. Come on. Oh, I like the pesto idea. I think I want some pesto, too. Yeah. I told Paul before he started that I had an olive oil addiction, and it was that. Every night, I would pour lots and lots of olive oil all over a big, big bowl of popcorn, and guess what I found on the table? Mommy's medicine. I told you guys, I need more than one bowl of this. If you were to show each other around your hometowns, what's the first thing you'd eat? I would bring you to my sister's restaurant. We would have pizza. Okay, wow, that's a lot of black olives. Is it like that thing in movies where everyone knows you when you walk in, and they're like, Paul, get over here! No. Okay. I'm doing some burrata here. This looks actually honestly really good. This is the side where the ricotta, yeah. Oh, there's ricotta. Oh, that's nice, too. Imagine you're at a restaurant, you look over, the chef's going like this. Hmm, what should I put in next? Hmm. I've been looking forward to this. Me, too. We need to do this in LA. We can do this. You can come over. I just feel like I just won't feel the same without the cameras. It's true. There's not a lot that Meg likes to do without the camera. But whatever. I'm your girlfriend. We'll make pizzas. Hey, new meme unlocked. If I took Paul to Cleveland, Ohio, I would take him to my father's tattoo shop that my brother also does tattoos at. And we would also have an amazing lunch at my mama's house. Yeah, that would be good. Honestly, I want to go. I don't think I told you this. Your mom DM'd me. What'd she say? She was just like, I'm so proud of you, sweetie. It was so sweet. It scared me because I was worried she threatened you to put the show back on. No, she was just very, very sweet. What did you say back? Nothing. I said I'm such a huge fan of your work. No, you left my mama in red for real. No, no, no. I messaged her back. I wish I could put myself in the oven. Don't. I messaged her back. I messaged her back. Yeah, parmesan. Let's do parmesan. Yeah, but what did you say back? I was just like, this is so sweet. I'm such a fan of your work, Meg. I said we've never met, but you must be amazing to have such an amazing daughter. That's what I said. But it's private. It's between me and your mom. These look pretty good. Yours actually looks great. Okay. I didn't hear thunderous applause. I'm serious. You're really good. I honestly have watched my sister do it so much. That is good, too. Hello, hello. Hot plate. Come on. It's a hot pizza. Come on in. Watch it. Hot pizza. Oh, yeah. Hey, little starter. That's gone bad. This one stinks. Okay. That's okay. But we're going to encourage it. You know what? All any starter needs is one person to love it. And in this case, it has two. I love you. Have you seen those videos where it's like two things are rice. One rice, they're saying nice things. The other bowl of rice, mean. I hate you. I hate you. The rice that said mean, old faster. Oh, it gets moldy faster? Yeah. Oh, this is real? Yes. No, it's real. We love you, starter. We love you even more than Aubrey Plaza did. Wow. Okay. Well, okay, starter. All you have to do is believe in yourself. Here, let me do it. We love you, little starter. We're even going to name you. What is it going to be? Jezebel. Jezzy, Jezzy. You're flirty, aren't you? Really naughty. Oh, wow. You did a good job. So cute. I almost got it. It's right there. Here, can I have it? Oh, my gosh. I didn't know it was electric like that. I did get it. Where did it go? I don't know. Wow. Get out of here. Wow, Paul. Your sister's going to be hiring you at the restaurant. I hope she's proud. This was a lot of pressure, actually. That's amazing. Can I answer this? Yeah, wow. That looks like a restaurant pizza for real. Oh, my gosh. Mine looks like you got it at the gas station. My pizza has tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese, a little burrata, caramelized onions, pepperoni, and prosciutto. And then I just finished it with some basil and a little bit of olive oil. You know I like that. Mommy's pills right here. She's not going to be able to keep her hands off it. Oh. Mine looks like a party size, sort of. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. That looks great, Meg. My fantasy is that it's so good that they go, you actually should make pizzas. That looks amazing. It looks pretty different than yours, but still. It's not about the look. It's about the taste. If the cast of Hacks owned a restaurant, what would everyone's role be? I'm trying to think of who's the best cook, like who would be the chef. Well, also it's personality. I could see you and Lucia being head chefs. Because I feel like you're able to go, hey, we need to do this. Let's go. Come on. Okay, I could be the sommelier. That would be fun. That's the person that tells you about the wine, suggests a bottle, brings it out. I could be the midnight janitor that comes in and vacuums the carpet. Hello, girls. I'm saying hi to Rose and Hannah as they're leaving. You're lighting up a cigarette in the restaurant. I'm like, hey, can you put the cigarette out? And they go, no, I'm vacuuming it. I throw the cigarette. Vacuuming it. It's about the air quality. It's about the air quality. Hi, I have a Febreze can. Hello. Anyway, the restaurant doesn't do very well, I guess. If you were a food dish, what would you be and can you answer for each other? You'd be one of those snow cones where it's like they load it. It's like a loaded snow cone. So it's like there's custard and snow cone and there's like gummy worms and stuff. Because that's like the best thing you could ever eat. And it's like, I think that you're the most awesome. That is so sweet. Thank you so much. So many layers. Say something nice. I think that you would be a funnel cake. Makes you sick after a couple bites? Great. No, because you're also so sweet. You're an American classic. We actually had funnel cakes one day at Hacks and I got sick from eating it. How about this? You would be a chocolate chip cookie because it's classic. It's delicious. Everybody loves it. People pretty much know what they're getting every time. It's not even the best kind of dessert. I guess we'll get a cookie if it's free. I'm like, what do you want? A pineapple upside down cake? I guess so. No, that's great. Thank you. You're welcome. Come get it. Nice and hot. Get your plate. Get your fork. Sharpen your knife. Are you proud of what you made? To be honest, you guys made the dough so I kind of feel jealous that you guys were able to do that. I feel like a baby that they put in a high chair with ingredients right in front of her. I wish cooking dinner felt like this. Oh, all the ingredients are right here. We'll clean up after. Wow, that looks great. Also, I think to sharpen my plate, I'm going to put some more of this. Ricotta, yum. Sharpen my plate a bit. I was going to take a bite looking into the camera and it feels really intimate. I couldn't look at the camera. I had to look away. Don't look. Oh my gosh. I'm actually blushing. Okay, that was excellent. I did put meat on mine. Can you try mine? I can try yours. This one's for you. It's delicious. I'm going to take the pepperoni off and give it back to you. Yours is way better than mine because you kept it simple. No, mine tastes really good too. Yeah, it's so good. Like really good. This is so good. I wish you guys could try it. Well, you go after, right? Yeah. Or you don't want it because of how gross I've been? Thank you, New York Times Cooking, and thank you for watching. Hacks is streaming right now on HBO Max.