Women Are CONFUSED As Men Stop Trying To Impress Them In Modern Dating!

Guys, here's a rant on to why these men are trifling. Okay, first of all, they do this and this is such a pattern I've seen. I'm 22 years old. I've been dating, you know, since I was 18. A pattern I've seen with these guys is they like get high off of the chase. Like they will be so obsessed with you. And then like after you wait, like after you finally reciprocate the obsession back, then they're cool off for you. Then they start taking longer to respond. Now they're acting more like dry. I'm like, bro, you were literally obsessed with me first. But now that I started to reciprocate it back now, you're like falling off like that pisses me off like these men are trifling. If you're ever down bad just remember I stayed with someone for like five years that cheated on me with numerous Walmart versions of me and that's not just me saying something in a progression. That's people telling me that they were Walmart versions of me. Everyone knew. Dated with someone that punched holes in the walls when he got jealous because I was getting attention. And by getting attention, I mean like maybe someone looking at me for a little longer than he deemed. Okay taped pictures of us from the ceiling hanging on balloons for his birthday after knowing all of this five years and that didn't start on the fifth year. No, so don't feel bad. You know, we all make mistakes. Hopefully we just we learn from them. Where are we swiping on the dating apps these days? Is it Raya? Is it Hinge? Is it Bumble? I actually just deactivated my Raya for the first time since 2021 because I realized I was having to go to therapy every single time. I've met a man on Raya. I was like you are giving me PTSD and trauma and then I have to go to therapy to unwind all of the damage. So I was like, okay Raya clearly is not worth $20 a month. But like should I be on Hinge? Should I be on Bumble? Should I be on Tinder? Is like Tinder still a thing? Is there another app that I don't even know about? Like can somebody help me? What's good guys? It's your boy Justin J coming to you another video. Let's cook boys. Let's cook. Alright, women are confused as men stop trying to impress them in modern dating. We got action. Let's cook. I think a lot of men still believe that women are mainly looking for a provider. In reality, a lot of women are already providing for themselves now. Have our own money. We have our own career. We have our own apartment. What a lot of women are actually craving isn't just a man who can pay for things. It's a man who knows how to listen. A man with emotional intelligence. A man who can communicate and understand nuance and actually make a woman feel seen. Because you can be with a man who does everything right on paper, but if he doesn't understand you on a deeper level, you're still going to feel lonely in that relationship. And I think this is where a lot of women go wrong in dating because they prioritize the surface level traits. Status, money, confidence, chemistry. They don't stop early enough to ask, does this person actually understand me? Can he hold emotional depth? Does he know how to listen without making everything about himself? Because if you don't prioritize that early on, you can easily end up in a relationship where you're deeply misunderstood. I don't think that's talked about enough. A provider is great, but being emotionally safe with someone, being deeply understood by someone, those are the things that actually determine the quality of the relationship. This is complete cat because you have access to this and you've had access to this. You know, women are more successful. We own our own homes. We have bank accounts. We have this. We have that blah blah blah blah blah blah. Listen, if it's about a man's personality, like I keep saying, you have access to a ton of guys that have great personalities. In fact, you need channels like mine to snap most men out of the BS, to snap them out of being so giving, so sure about a woman because it gets them nothing in return. So why do channels like mine need to exist to help men better decode things in dating and actually understand their own self-worth? If what you're saying is true, women are looking for more than providers. They're looking for a guy that will sit there and listen to them and uplift them. And honestly, you know, men do care about women. That's half of the reason why you guys have rights. That's why men still defend your honor in a lot of cases. So miss us with all of this, you know, we're looking for more than providers. We don't want to hear it. It's nonsense. Let's get the next one. I am in the point of dating where I am just sitting on my couch texting. It's like the only thing I can think of doing right now. Why is it so fun to text a crush? I don't know. Don't know. But it's so fun. This is more than just a crush from being for real. You know, when you try to avoid something for so long that you think you don't want, the universe is just like, it's not up to you. It's not up to you. I've made it very clear to this man. I am not ready for a relationship and he has not pressured me for one at all. But the way that he has been behaving as just a normal person who I've been hanging out with. I can't ignore it. It's like obviously the feelings are growing. Oh my God, if I ever post this. Anyway, just figured I'd share for anyone that's going through it doesn't last long. If you don't love it, I guess. I don't know. That's all. This is how I look at my phone all day. I want to puke. Told you the less that you do will expose how a woman feels about you because check this out. She thinks she's big and bad. I'm not looking for a relationship. I told him that he's like, all right, cool. We'll just be myself. I'm gonna kick it with you because I'm feeling you but I'm not going to put too much on it. And now look at her. Turns out she's feeling him more than she thought. But if he would have started chasing behind her, she wouldn't have been confused. He would have given her certainty. And now she's like, why am I feeling this way? Because he's not campaigning for the relationship. He's not trying. You told him exactly what it is and he's listening. She falls back. This is why I instruct guys fall back. Always think about it like this by you doing too much. You're never gonna look you can do too much and that will hurt you. You falling back. It will never hurt you. It will never hurt you. It will only work in your favor. Okay, she ain't feeling me. She ain't feeling me. At least I ain't do too much. Oh my gosh, she's feeling me. Well, I wasn't doing too much. I was just being myself. It's a win-win. Let's get the next one. Guys, Hinge is so ******* weird. Okay, I need to tell you a story and like tell me if this is weird or not. I think it's so ******* weird. So basically I match with this guy, right and like we match like a day ago or something and the next day he messages me and he's like, Hey, hi Selena. How are you? Whatever and I don't really respond to it because I'm just like I'm a busy person. Okay, and then he messages me again and he's like, do you want to come out with me tonight? And I'm like, no like I was in bed. So I just didn't reply to it. Then I wake up the next morning and I get a call from him and he's like, hey, and I'm like, oh, hey, how are you? And he's like, oh like you didn't want to go out with me last night. I was like, no and then we start making plans and he's like, we make plans for the future. Okay, and then that night he FaceTimes me and I'm like, okay, I'm down for a FaceTime. So we FaceTime. We're talking. He goes to show me something on his phone. So he starts screen sharing. Okay. Tell me why my contact name in his phone because when someone's screen sharing you can like see your contact name is the following. Baby. Bro, we just matched on Hinge two days ago and this is our first full-length conversation. Why is my name saved in your phone as baby bro? And like I didn't even say anything because like I didn't even know how to address it. Like that's just weird. Like I don't want to like make things weird by addressing it. But like bro, it was so weird. **** like, I don't know. Maybe I'm like exaggerating or overthinking it but like what would you guys do? Would you think it's weird? Like am I just being an avoidant? Why don't guys yearn? Why aren't men intentional? I need a guy who's all about me off rip. I don't compete. What is this? I know what it is. But what is this? This is why I instruct dudes don't do too much. He ain't even really say nothing. He just she saw it on the screen. It was like baby. Oh, no, I'm not feeling this. So I tell you no lovey-dovey names. Don't try to do any of that. See guys think they're going to sweet talk a woman and all that stuff. But what you need to understand is just don't do it at all. She said he got my name saved as baby, but then they'll turn around and say if he's not obsessed with you, you know, if he's not obsessed with me, I don't want him. So what's this? And I told you guys a long time ago. Like I always think back to situations with women and that's one thing that kind of irks them. Why isn't there a heart next to my name? Well, obviously this was a day he's doing too much, but you're talking to a woman for a little while could be a couple weeks and she's like, why isn't there a heart next to my name? What do you have me saved under your name? What the hell because they want to lock you in but in a scenario like this, he just started talking to her. There's no need to do any of that and there's no need to do it at all. But I'm just showing you when you do too much. They start to get turned off, but they say a bunch of nonsense women don't even know what they want. They don't even know what they want for breakfast. So this is why you might get frustrated when you're like damn. I thought everything was going well, but now she's acting like she ain't feeling me like that. Well, did you do too much? And once again, when you don't do too much, you're not even thinking that anyway. Oh damn. She's she acting flaky. She doesn't want to talk to me anymore. I will I invest a bunch of dates. I didn't do any of this. So I'm cool. Always remember bro. When you do too much in the beginning, you're setting yourself up for failure. And when you don't do too much, that's what leads them to be confused. Why why doesn't he want to put in this effort? Let me investigate this. Let's get the next one. I'm 38 and I've never been somebody's girlfriend. Not even once not even a little bit. I've had situationships. I've had almost. I've had confusion mixed signals and ghosting and men that acted like they liked me until it required effort, but an actual relationship. No never and I know for some people that that sounds shocking or dramatic or like I sound desperate. It's even a little embarrassing to say it out loud. I didn't admit it for a really long time because I was embarrassed never having had a boyfriend, but this is actually the reality of a lot of women when people hear single they assume that's recent and it's like no babe like historically and for a long time. I let that make me feel like something was wrong with me. Like I missed a class that everyone else took on how to be lovable. I am done acting like my life hasn't started because I've never been picked. So if this sounds like you or you just want to follow along on this journey of mine and learning to be happy with or without a relationship welcome as always love you mean it. She's never been in a relationship late 30s, right? This is a red flag. See women think that right they can go through situationships and go through experiences with men where it didn't go in their favor or they were just messing around with a bunch of dudes. That's no bueno. That's really no bueno. You have no consistency with the guy and you're going after men who don't really see you as worth it. So how do you think that reflects on you? Like if a man if you and a man have a conversation and you're telling him well, I've never been in a relationship, but I've you know, I've been around the block. No guy has ever seen you as worth it. Why should I see you as worth it? This is what they don't get see men don't have a problem with women being with other guys. It's just like okay. Well, what was that about? Are you been in this relationship? You've been in this relationship. Okay, it didn't end on any bad terms. Nobody cheated or maybe he cheated or whatever. Did you learn from the experience? Okay, that's showing you it's like kind of like a an interview process for a job. Oh, you've been at this company for six seven eight years. Oh, you got a promotion at this time. Oh, you know, they let you go. Oh, you know things happen, but you're the perfect candidate for this position because you showed up to work on time never had any write-ups never had any problems like you understand you get where I'm going with this. So when she's saying, you know, I've never been someone's choice. I've never been in a relationship with somebody that's a red flag. And this is exactly why it's just going to continue to happen because there's a certain vibe. See, this is the problem when women go for men who understand the game, which is who she's going for in all of these experiences. They can easily decode and tell that ----. You're not anything that I need to invest into. Yeah, I'll sleep with you. But anything outside of that and I'm good off of that. So it just snowballs and it continues. But if she would just step outside of her usual type and even this chick man, they all have this problem. If you would step outside of that, you would actually get to know somebody that you're more compatible with. You're just looking at all these guys right who continue to do the same thing and you're like, I'm not coming off of what I want, but you're not getting what you want either because you can already go out there and get sex but it sounds like you're talking about being a woman who's never been good enough to lock down. Let's get the next one. Well, let's talk about dating in Miami. I've come to the realization that if I want to have a boyfriend in Miami, I have to be okay with being cheated on not everyone, but almost every single person that I know guy and girl. It's not just guys cheats or has cheated. It's getting to a point where I'm like, okay, so if I want a boyfriend I have to basically just turn a blind eye when I probably know he's cheating on me or maybe I just know some really shitty people and I'm not hating on Miami. Like I don't think this is only Miami. I think this is like in a bunch of different cities, but I think the lifestyle here just makes it like more common and to make it worse one of my guy friends said to me, I can't have a guy that doesn't cheat that is attractive and is rich. Like I have to pick two. I was like, okay, that's just you like that's maybe you and your friends and he was like, no Amanda. Like I'm just being honest with you like you have to pick two. This was like two years ago and I'm starting to come to the realization that like maybe he was right. A lot of people say to me like why don't you just move out of Miami and I'm like, first of all, if I have to move away from a city to find someone that doesn't cheat like I want a guy that could live in Miami and be around like a bunch of temptation like whatever and still not cheat if you have to take him out of Miami, babe, like he's still going to cheat. So you're attracted to cheaters. Is that what this woman is saying? Like you're attracted to cheaters because what it sounds like to me is, you know, I'm not coming off of what I want and when she said I'm coming to the realization that maybe my friend was right. What she's saying is I'm gonna keep going after what I want and I'm just going to have to accept this rather than going for a guy that wants to be all about her. Isn't this crazy? This is why dating is the way it is. That's why you can't put emotion into it. You can't think that trying more is going to get you somewhere because she knows that men will cheat the type of men. She's attracted to they're going to cheat. She wants a guy who's attractive who has money and who has the option to get other women but only chooses her and her friends letting her know like yo, you know, you're going to play a losing game and she's like, you know what I'm coming to the realization that this is just the way it is, you know, somebody even offered, you know, moving out of Miami might help your chances of finding a guy who's going to commit to you and only you know, I'm not doing that. Why would I do that then flips it and says, you know, men are going to cheat everywhere. This is funny with them and they got the options right there. They've had it throughout their life. Look at her. Let's not do this immature song and dance. Look at her. Come on now. Come on now need to get on with a dude build up with a dude invest flip invest in flip. Nope. Want the hot rich successful guy who has the option to be out in the clubs drives the sports cars super ripped up. Conventionally attractive very charming matter of fact, how charm the pants off the waitress as we're going to make our order at the restaurant. I want the guy that where I go to the bathroom. I have to think did he slide his number to her? Like that's the guy I want to be my guy not coming off of anything else. Now, it's an all-men problem knock it off man. Let's get the next one. I don't know what the current epidemic of men staring at you from across the bar and then never approaching is I don't know what is going on with that. If you're a man, please answer me as a woman in a bar. If I'm making eye contact with you more than twice. That is free range to just be like hello. Can I buy you a drink? How are you? What's your name? I don't know why we have lost the art of just a simple conversation in public hope it rotted our brains for the ability to just connect with other people. Actually if you're in New York and this is happening to you, honestly, I would get on cuffed. I'm on cuff now. And now and I feel like it's only the type of men who would approach you in a bar. Do you know what I mean? Like, we know what they want are like assertive enough to instigate a conversation. Maybe I'm at the wrong bar. So if you're in New York and you've been to places where men aren't just scared to literally say hi. Let me know this is what I'm saying, man. They don't understand the men who are not dumb know how to maneuver. They know how to move accordingly men have went to a bar and hooked up got handsy with a chick that didn't have to he didn't have to buy her a drink more like some other sucker or some other suckers were buying her drinks. Then she bumped into the guy who didn't buy her a drink and she left with that guy. She hooked up with that guy. So why does a man have to come over to you kick it start a conversation buy you a drink for what? Once again, I'm telling you guys nothing matters certain things matter, but with you I'm talking about with them when you're like, well, if I do this this way, it'll matter more. That's not how it goes. That's not how it goes. So yeah, men aren't going to bars to try to impress you and buy drinks that doesn't impress you. All it tells you is let me keep talking to this loser. So he'll buy me a drink. But when you really like a dude, you're interested in him. Let me keep talking to him because I'm interested in him. Doesn't that make sense? But they're confused as to why aren't men doing this the men that you want aren't doing this the men that you want move accordingly. So this was women are confused as men stop trying to impress them in modern dating. Hope you guys got a lot out of it. It's your boy. Justin J get with you boys in the next video. Like comment subscribe. Let's go boys. Let's go when a girl says she wants a guy to yearn for her. That's for the pretty guys. The cute niggas yearning is not for the ugly niggas. That's called harassment. You keep begging and pleading and I just need you and just salivating at the mouth and ----. That's harassment when you're cute. That's yearning. That's you know working for it. That's being passionate. Sorry, everybody don't get the same terminology my ******* does, you know, facially challenging ----. Sometimes it's just it don't hit the same. It just be like, oh my God, like what do you see in me that you seem to resonate with? Like am I ugly like it starts scaring me you you want me so bad and it's like I don't even see myself like that with you, but you see something. So it's like is it me? Am I the problem? Am I the issue? Am I the drama? So that's the that's the difference when you cute and you know, you can you know, you ******* cute that's called yearning. That's what I want. Come with the cute you you ugly. No, you don't gotta hear it from me. One time say I'm okay. That's it. You don't gotta keep on you know, making songs and this and then a third because you know, I'm not easy but bitch I be going like I'm not gonna lie, but if I ain't going it don't you just not that him just not.