Billie Eilish - “What Was I Made For?” (Behind the Scenes)

I really wanted it to feel like how the old Barbies looked. I didn't grow up on the old Barbies, obviously, but they're just the coolest thing in the world. Vintage Barbie is, like, some of the coolest stuff ever. Yeah, it was really fun to, like, make the mood board for it. Like, I just pictured desk, chair, sage green blonde ponytail, yellow outfit, and the dress is perfect. My mom's mom, who I never met, my grandma, she used to make clothes for my mom, and they were very cute. And a couple of them she still had when I was a kid, and I would wear them, and they were, like, just the sweetest little, you know, cute little square with buttons, mod dresses. And I was picturing those. Oh, it should shade first like there's a little earthquake, and then it should be windy, and then it should be rain. What was I made for? Part of what's hard about directing is, especially when you're someone like me that, like, I don't know much about cameras. I just have these ideas, and I think that I know how to execute them. Just so that I'm, like, struggling more and, like, have more to do, you know? The initial verse is great, though, but then right after that, just having just more dynamics. Thanks, guys. And I knew I wanted it to be one shot, and that was an issue to begin with, especially when you're like, I want there to be wind, and then I want it to rain all over me, and I want to be wearing a really intricate wig. Talked to Pat, my DP. He really nailed what I was telling him. I was like, okay, I want it to feel really gritty. We were talking 16 millimeter. I don't know if that's going to be even gritty enough. I think it will be. If it's a one take or similar to a one take, I'll do my own version in the yard, and if it hurts, it's too bad. And I made a little mock-up of how I wanted it. All the camera movements are specific to the lyrics. And then a big note was, like, I didn't want the camera to be moving around or following me if I go off screen or whatever, because the camera is just filming, and I happen to be there. So, like, if something blows off the table and I run off off screen to get it, the camera doesn't even notice. I don't know. I don't know how to feel But I want to try I don't know. Just thought of, like, the ones that I feel have been the most seen, that the fans were drawn to the most. Or, like, the ones from, like, big moments in my life. So, like, the bellyache one, the Grammys outfit when the party's over with the black, the crown. The lovely outfit, this little yellow camo outfit that I wore a bunch. The bad guy yellow outfit, like, Dapper Dan looks from SNL. One of the first shirts that I ever sold, which was really cute. All the little shoes. There's the little choker that I wore in the Vanity Fair video. It was hard, though, because there's so many that we could have put in, but we could only do, like, a certain amount. You know, it's all these past versions of myself that are me, and they're also not me, because they're different versions of me, but they'll always be me. And it's just, I mean, thinking about your life and the present and the past and the future is a scary and gut-wrenching thing to do. I think we have it.