My Parents Rely On Me For Everything

Brought to you by the EveryDollar app. Start budgeting for free today. My parents are a little bit past retirement age and they do not have two nickels to rub together to make a fire. But they are always coming back to me and relying on me to help them out constantly. I even paid their bills for them for a very long time. All their utilities and what have you for a very long time. I finally had to put my foot down and say no more. This is ridiculous. You guys have made a lot of money and got a lot of money and they just blow every dime there is and keep coming back to the well. But now the well is, hey, I need money for groceries. Hey, I need money for medicine and things of that nature. I'm debt free. I've saved up. I've done everything. I've went by your principles and now I'm not sure what I need to do to help them out. What is your, what's your network? Mine is, um, without my house, I have about 300. I'm sorry, how much again? 300,000. Okay. With my savings account. How old are you? My, um, I am 45. And what do you make? I make one 30 a year. Are you single? I am. It's just me and my daughter. Okay. And how old are mom and dad? Uh, mom had turned a 74 and she just went through a really bad bout at the hospital, uh, last year where she can't do anything anymore. And my father, uh, he had 69 and he is, uh, working part-time and he has like a bunch of side hustles, but they still owe everybody money and taxes and social security and just, they owe everybody money. So they're just, they're so stuck. They owe social security. Yeah. How do you owe? So they're supposed to be getting social security. I do not know. It was, it was something they did. They were taking social security while one of them was working because they were still working full time while taking social security. I don't know the whole thing, but they just keep looking at me. They're now, they're now getting social security checks, right? They are, but they're gonna start garnishing all of their money because they owe it back. Social security overpayment. Yes. So they're in a really tough spot. And what's their homework? Hey, what's up guys? It's Jade. Listen, my husband and I drive used vehicles and we really do plan on keeping those running for a long time. So we trust Christian Brothers Automotive to take care of them. Their team is honest. Their shops are super clean. And what I love is they don't try to upsell us on things that we don't need. I personally feel really confident walking into Christian Brothers because I know that no one's going to try to take advantage of me or scare me into unneeded repairs. Christian Brothers gets it. So schedule a service today at cbac.com slash Ramsey and get 10% off your visit. That's up to a $250 value. See stores for details. And what's their homework? They have no home. They are and I pay for their car for them. So they ain't got to ever worry about that. So I just I don't know what else to do to help them. So you're paying a car payment or you bought them? No, no, I bought their car. Okay, so they have a car. But basically, you're sure they have no income coming from social security? Or this is just the story that? Well, they have income coming in right now. And I'm trying to work with the Social Security Administration to to not garnish so much so they can still live. And all the paperwork and I'm working on Medicaid. I'm working on all these things trying to help them out. But I just can't keep all the plates in the air spinning and also are you their only child? No, I'm a child. I'm one of 10. Where's the other one? Some of them are adopted. So and they're very young. So I'm they're just now starting their life out. So I've not asked them for anything. The other ones. They are not financially stable whatsoever. I am the only one that has no debt that has bought a house that has done all the things and done the responsible thing. Everybody else is kind of sideways. You do not have the money to 100% support two households. You don't make enough? No, no. So you're going to have to $1 or more that you are going to commit to this. I did that already. And then after that, after that, the answer is just no. It's just no. I'm sorry, mom. I just don't have the money. I'm sorry that I have this much money. And I'm giving you enough to cover your lights and your groceries. There's that coming in and I can't cover the other stuff. You're going to have to do something else. You have to figure it out. Yeah, because I did that for years and they took the little bit of money they did have and blew it. Well, that's why I guess you get to decide. You get that. You told me three times how bad they are with money, which means you resent giving them money. So zero is a possible amount to give them. Okay. Or I'm just trying to honor them. No, you're not honoring them. That's bull. That's honor your parents from the Bible does not mean give money to people who are misbehaving. That is not what that Bible reference means. It means that we honor the office of father, the office of mother. But if your mother's doing cocaine, we don't give her cocaine and call that honoring your mother. That's bull. Okay. So no, you're there misbehaving and we're not going to honor their misbehavior period. Now you get to decide how involved you still want to be in this. You could go all the way to, uh, I'm going to give you $500 a month and you're going to give me your social security check and control of your money. And you don't get to spend anything except what I say. And that way I know you're buying groceries and your lights are kept on because you people are acting like you're 14 years old and you live in Congress. Actually, there's 14 year olds that do a better job than you people. And so you're correct. You know, you can, you can go that far and just take over and take care of them as if they're complete imbeciles, which they may be. Okay. Or you can say, I'm going to do nothing. I've done all I'm going to do. Good luck with it over there. Figure it out, boys and girls, you're freaking adults. You can say that there's nothing wrong morally with any of that, but you decide where in there, but that your problem, what's driving you crazy is there is a constant moving target that you have allowed. And once you say no more moving target, then you're going a hundred percent chance. You're going to get pushed back from them. Okay. Because they have bound, they're boundary lists people. And when you set a boundary with boundary list people, a hundred percent of the time they resist it. And you have in the past and they've run right through it, right? Well, yeah. So I'm going to get, I'm going to give you this amount of money and no more. And I'm just going to send you the check and y'all figure it out. I'll tell you what I would do. I would buy grocery cards and I would take, I would pay directly to the light company. I'm not giving anybody money anymore. Yeah, that's good too. I'm going to send you $200 worth of cards from Publix every month. And I'm going to pay your light bill through the end of the year. There's no way that you don't feel bad about what comes next. The person I want you to not feel bad about is you. Yeah. A hundred percent chance. They're going to piss you off. Create your free every dollar budget today. The simplest way to budget for your life.