Chris Evans funny moments 2015

The human Dorito is in the house, but we've also got... The real Dorito is... Have you ever tasted yourself? You are delicious, by the way. That's exactly what I thought you'd taste like. As kids, and you know... Everyone except... But, you know, for the most part, you know, it's... Listen, working, working's a tricky... Have the kids come into the family. I'm glad we got that in. What do you say to people who are just so happy and got great kids? Some of them... I don't like it. I don't like it. And it's that phrase somehow worked its way into my day-to-day vernacular. You just kind of say, I don't like it. Is there, like, Avengers daycare? Are you guys lining up the kids? Chris babysits for us, because he doesn't have kids. And he used to go out. And they're more on the same reading level, and it's just... Same intelligence. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He needs to have his darkest change still. We like bright colors. It's kind of easy. It's nice. I like Ninja Turtles. How did they get those on their feet? Who was the guy at a meeting who was like, I got it, I got it? Turtles, teenagers, ninjas. Best pitch mating ever. Done. It's gonna be huge. Worst job you had before acting? Cleaning breast pumps. Did you clean breast pumps? The breast pumps loved it. And I would, like, scrub off dried milk off these machines. And if they didn't work, I'd have to unscrew them, replace the little fan. Have to pump the breast myself. It was just exhausting. These women are just, like, breaking breast pumps. In the corner, like, is that working? Chris, what happened? Worst job. I didn't have a bad job. I worked as a CIT at a summer camp. An acting camp. That's what I was doing as a kid. Chris was cleaning breast pumps. I'm like, hey! Chris used to work at Disneyland, and in this picture, he's helping a child reach for a lost balloon. You mentioned before that you're looking to possibly retire. I was like, you know, I think I might take a break from acting. Chris, I'm retiring, man. I never said retiring. Do your research. Out of habit, do you ever say flame on when you use a grill? All the time. Do you guys have any input, though, on those tweaks that are made to the costumes? Well, just what makes things easier. You want to be able to pee easier. Whatever is easy to get them off and on. Obviously, there are certain parts that pinch or scratch or things like that in a fight sequence. You want to make sure that it's accommodating. But really, just being able to pee. He loves uniforms. He loves them. Couldn't just be a nurse or something? Looks great. Who doesn't? Or a doctor. Mailman. That's Camp 3. Just deliver a mail. But he does it so efficiently. And man, those dogs. Elizabeth Olsen just revealed that you are a tap dancer. Aw, she's out there saying that to everybody. I mean, listen, listen. All right. Yes, yes. I did grow up tap dancing. I can't say I'm a tap dancer. But that's what Lizzie is putting out there. I'll take it. Why not? Absolutely. Makes me look cool. Do you perform any rituals before filming? Any rituals before filming? I have a good cry. A good cry? Just sitting in my trailer with a low ball. You're worthless. No, you're not. You're amazing. Yes. I have a secret. You're a good person. And I'm beautiful. Action. People like you. You're a good person and people like you. Chris played Mr. Freezy in The Iceman. But in this picture, he looks muy caliente. Han Solo or Indiana Jones? What's the answer? Oh, Jesus. Oh, it's coming. You have no idea what's coming. Han Solo or Indiana Jones? Yeah. One of those is safe. Oh, man. Don't you dare. It's impossible. Can I just kill myself? I'd say Indiana Jones. You taking Indiana Jones or Han Solo? Yeah. I gotta take Han Solo. Good. We're still alive. I swore. It's 50-50. I see three Thors. Open your eyes. Wow. I see three Thors. I don't see any. Drink it in, boys. Where's the cap? That's on the phone. What's going on here? Uh-oh. Thor? Yeah, it's the wedding chinga. Yeah, this is the one you do fun stuff with, though. Wow. This is gonna sound strange, but I say it. That's great. You can't ever say it. Say it. I'm right here with you. Say it. Do not be afraid. Go. I have, like, 20 horrible jokes in my head that I'm not gonna say. Can we all agree that Evans is on fire today? Evans, you're on damn fire. Oh, man. I'm, like, red. And, Chris, you were the only one sitting around talking to me. I'm a big fan of the movie Snokers. If you could drop Thor and Captain America onto that train. It would've taken over. It would've been their train. Wilford is done. Thor's at the front of the train. I say 30, 40. 40% of the votes were my mom. But the other 60%, it really, really means a lot to me. This is not a lie. It's a lie. That's a lie. How did they set you guys apart, being Chris and Chris? Chris 1, Chris 2. I think it was Chris 1. Chris 2. They were, like, where's Chris 1? Where's the best Chris? They called you Chris. They were, like, you over there with the shield thing. And it was, like, just Chris. Just called him Crocodile Dundee, sure. Tell me about the very first time that you met chemistry straight away. I saw his aura. I saw him in the corner in the coffee machine. I was, like, he looks like a really nice guy. I was, like, is that my stand-in? Thor, oops. Hey, what's up? Can I get me a coffee? Thanks, bro. We heard shut up quite a few times. A lot. Guys, hey, shut up! Chris, what's happening to us? We're in trouble. Like, you feel like you're 12 years old and in trouble at school. Shut up. We have to work. Who's in charge of fun? Chris? No, we're not going to do that. We're on TV, guys. Is this brunch time or is this after lunch? Hey, what are you doing later? Want to see a movie? You don't need the rest of the Avengers, really. Let's just hang out and eat ice cream. Well, we go out. I just don't call him the next day. Yeah. That really bugs me. I don't play hard to get. I don't want to date you, but you're a really nice guy. You're a nice guy. You'll find someone. It's not me. It's me. This was just catching up with old friends. Yeah. Except Tim. He hated me. Avoided me. We're thanking you. It's weird that we're in the same interview. We're thanking it, though, real well. That was hot, right? Yeah. And I guess the big thing is we get to see Thor. As important as the acting in these films are, of course, the biceps. Oh, that's me, right? Just when I wake up. Is it me? It is Robert Downey Jr. Wow. What? That's RDJ. Shut up, Vince. Oh, boy. Is it, like, nailed down? There it is. Team Hammer. Which of the Crisses would win in an arm wrestling match? Why? It's like, what are we doing here? What are we doing here? We're too good of friends. I mean, come on. Vanessa can take a hike. Next question. Who would win when you guys are arm wrestling? Find everybody. Now, let's go. No, I'm going to lose that one. I'm going to lose that one. You wouldn't. Cap and Criss. My character and I. Which Criss can bench press more? Come on. What are these questions? Which Criss is taller? We know the answer. Are you just trying to hurt my feelings? We know. Which Criss is most likely to grab a cupcake with no arms? Which one has a better Australian accent? Word to describe this gem. God. You know what that is, right? Is it you? You know that stud. Check out that bead necklace. Looks like Captain America. One word. I didn't know any better. Pathetic. Just because I'm an equal opportunist. Uh-oh. Watch. Yeah. This gem. He looks like that now. Come on. You couldn't go younger? Dad? Ah, too messy. You broke up like this. Oops. She's rolling out of bed. Do you understand Evan's accent? No. Come on. What are you talking about? Shut up. We gotta do this. I mean, it really felt like school. It did. They're in trouble giggling. Can Bostonians out drink Aussies? Yes. The answer is yes. Shots. Bring them in. No. Ready. I can't stop. Something I got from a lot of people on Twitter, so it's actually a really serious question. Captain America Thor. Captain America. No. You're both nearing the end of your contract with Marvel. Yeah. Oh, God. You're both nearing the end of your relevancy. No, no, no, no, no. You're about to be replaced. Wait. No. Both of you are nearing the end of your contract, and a lot of people are actually legitimately concerned, and they want to hear from you. That was so long. What you could possibly do. So long. All right. Back to cleaning breast pumps. Oh, my God. We're just bonkers. We're just ruining our career. We have no career left. It's over. This is it. Enjoy this right now. This is our last junkie. The breast pump gig sounds pretty good. Yeah. I'm not going to lie. I can get you a job. I know somebody, so I'll tell you what. Yeah, no. If Cap doesn't work out, I'm coming to pharmacy. The rumor is that Captain America is off the market. Is that true? Oh. Is that all I get? No. Come on. Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. You're very sweet, though. He's patting my microphone. Individually, we're all very focused professional actors, and you get us together, and we turn into 12-year-olds. Nailed it. BSF. Yeah. So tell me. We have little necklaces. They're like half broken hearts. Yeah. When no one's looking, we're like, great job. Great job. Aw. Why are you both so great? There we go. Let's just sum it up like that. Ah, we can't help it. Special effects. CGI. Magic. I think this is our fifth movie out. Wow. So you must know him pretty well. I know him very well. Too well, I'm not sure. I mean, everything that he's going to do. I need a bet here. Patriots versus one of his teams. If you win, seriously, how does this play out? How does this play out if you win? You have to wear the Thor costume and the Thor wig in the next movie. Win, win. You get one of my children. But if I win, I get you as my fourth child. Okay. Win, win. Damn, that sucks again for me, doesn't it? When we sat down for Captain America, you were telling me how you would do push-ups right before a scene. I was not telling you that. I feel like I'm a constant let down. You get a lot of people on the street that are like, hey, I thought you were bigger. I put on 20 pounds of muscle. I mean, I don't want to say we noticed, but. Well, I had someone did. She's like, you put on 20 pounds? Weird. Of muscle. Chris, I just wanted to talk to you about one of your early roles. It can't be good. When you were Tyler, the surfer. Oh, man. That is just existing online. I'm in a wet suit. Who are these dudes? I don't know. Idiots. I hate surfing. Really? Truth's out. I've never surfed. God, look, I'm holding a surfboard like I know what the hell I'm doing. Is that how you hold a surfboard? I have no idea. Do you still surf? Yeah, yeah. We were surfing the other week, right? There was like 30 of us out surfing. And a great white just cruised through the lineup. And I was sitting there looking out the back, and my friend's like, what are those guys doing? And they're all just huddling together, trying to be a bigger shape in the water as this great white. Oh, that's worth it. Let's catch a few waves. Hope we don't get eaten by a great white shark. Well, hang on, hang on, hang on. Let's just punch together. It's more dangerous walking down the street and driving your car than it is in the ocean. No, it's not. Yes, it is. Statistically, more people die of bee stings. More people shake vending machines. I'm not huddling on the 405 to avoid a great white. The 405 is way more sharky than the ocean. Do you want to do a jump over my shoulders? I can. If you just drop your head, I can get up. How many times a week do people come up to you guys and just say, I love Star Trek? It's like, that's not me. Not Chris Pine. No, I get Pratt. I never get Hemsworth. Do you get Pratt? Which is really upsetting. Please think I'm Hemsworth. No. You can be a Hemsworth. Everybody loves you guys. Is it hard for you guys to just step out? You guys are your own person. We love us too, so it's kind of awesome, you know? Yeah, it works out. I mean, we're all in agreement. Captain America is my favorite superhero. Oh! And Wonder Woman. Say it again. I'm sorry. I know. Let me just say. However, Thor is my favorite. There's not intensity as well, especially with Winter Soldier. I mean, the intensity level of that was great. Meaning not so much Thor. That's what he said. I can read between those lines, bro. Especially Winter Soldier. I got it. Continue. Just write this down. Which liked Scarlet and Ruffalo. You know, you see a lot of nice, intimate moments. It's my arc, really. It was the best arc of the movie. You know what? There's only enough room for so many superheroes. Take it. I like this kid. He's got more poise than I do. Better not steal my light, buddy. All right, go study. Dominating. Because you're doing it. You probably don't want to play Captain America. Just make him good. Just to play Thor for a second as an interesting guy. As someone with layers. You know layers? You know when there's depth behind the eyes? Muscles are great. But just kind of like, oh, there's something beneath the veneer. What's Cap gonna do? The right thing. Maybe I'd love to bring Thor to life. That's so boring, isn't it? Let me open the door for you. No, that's sexist. If you look into the meaning of that. How proud are you of what your brother does? Just barely, actually. Listen, the things he accomplished before 10 years old are way better than what he's doing now. You should have seen him back in the day. There weren't as many fans, but, man, I was killing it. He used to sing me to sleep. That's the biggest accomplishment he ever had. Okay, now it's getting interesting. Next question. I wouldn't mind being able to fly. Cap needs to somehow figure out this flight thing. Love you, too, man. A good kiss. That's hilarious. How do you hold your shield? Just like this, ready? That look good? Yeah. Show me. Yeah, get your arm in there. Grab it. And it pulls. That was good. You got a future in Hollywood, buddy. Yep. He's like, yep, I don't know. I got this. Slightly different nuances to Thor, whether he's on Asgard or on Earth or whatever. You bring new aspects to him. And with Captain America, it's like, as we've seen him evolve. He doesn't bring new nuances. Yes! That was perfect. Let me just say that we've had a lot of Captain America love. So I'm glad you get some. And then we see Captain America evolving into his leadership role. But we also see you evolving more and more as we see you more on screen. Owning the role. Right? Name the worst place to turn into the Hulk. I think there would be... Yeah, church would be terrible. Church! The bedroom. That's a good answer! Unfortunately... They say Cap cannot live without a war. Selfish. It's great for you, but the rest of us... Again? Can we just solve this? Selfish. My cat was stuck up a tree. Who do you call? Which of the Avengers? Oh, the Avengers. You can just kill it. No more cat up the tree! We'll go shopping. How does he understand modern style? He just gets it. He travels from universe to universe. He just gets it right. It's probably something like this. Nailed it. It's probably something like this. You know, like... Stay on the ground because you can't fly. Hi! Let me just catch up. You've got to be nice to someone. Would you be team Cap or team Tony? Come on, bro! If you had to choose. Come on, bro! Nah, come on. Thor and Tony, we have our differences. There we go. Thank God. You son of a bitch. Just my boy. You're my boy, Blue. You're my boy! You're my boy, Blue! You're my boy, T-Hammer. The end.