7 Habits That Changed My Life After 30 (Wish I Started Sooner)

If you want to change your life, you need to be consistently good, not occasionally great. And that's where your habits come in. And man, they are even more important post 30 when your life is fuller and your Spotify wrapped is just podcasts about gut health. Here are seven habits that changed my life after 30 try one or two of these out. I think you'll see a real difference. So most of my twenties, I focused on lifting weights, bench pressing and leg day that happens once a month. I always thought that was enough until I started feeling kind of sluggish throughout the day. One day I was walking past this track and thought to myself, you know, maybe one day I should go running on it. That sounds fun. And then a voice kicked on and said, why not now? So I hopped the fence and for the first time in years ran a couple laps around this track. My face was beet red by the end. I was clocking like 16, 18 minute miles. I mean, I was barely running. I went home and felt amazing the rest of the day, like better than I ever did when I went and lifted weights at the gym. It's so easy to write it off as, Oh, I'm too tired to work out, you know, at the end of the day. But one thing that's helped me is realizing you don't need energy to work out. You get energy from working out. That one hour you get out moving gives you three hours extra of productivity throughout the day. That's what I've noticed. Since changing my approach to that instead of like how much weight can I lift? How can I lose weight to look good? Like it really changed. It transformed my relationship with exercise because when you're doing it for a feeling, every single workout you do is a win. I used to come out of the gate just like running as fast and as hard as I can go and I would be wiped for the rest of the week. I didn't want to do it again. And when I switched to doing zone two, that was something I could do multiple times a week and I didn't feel exhausted afterwards. Like I needed to take a nap. Our steps decline as we age. So being more proactive with actual movements, ideally outdoors for me has been a game changer, especially as I get older. Stanford did this one study that always stuck with me and I think is really relevant to where we are today. They gave a presentation to a class of college students and at the end when they surveyed the students on how much they remembered from the presentation, only 5% remembered stats and 63% remembered the stories. Obviously reading can change your life and is important, especially as we get older to keep learning. But I think what's even more important than just cramming more information and kind of having this info gluttony phase that we're in as a society with AI tools where you can get summaries and you know, just a couple clicks. Information is just everywhere. What's more important and what I wish I did more of that is changing my life after 30 is reading stories. I'll give you some examples in a minute, but I'm even embarrassed to admit back in my twenties when I was in the phase of reading tons of nonfiction, if there was a story that the author put in there about someone or about themself, I would even skip it. And I thought it was about the tactics. Like, okay, just give me the good stuff. Not, not any of the fluff or filler. I, you know, I want the how to, and that mindset is prevalent even today. You know, you see every YouTube video, people are summarizing it in the comments and they want to get through as much information as fast as possible. What I learned is that sucks all the soul and nuance from things. And it's about the depth of the ideas and the deeper they are and the more time you spend with them, the more they'll stick with you and the more they have the ability to change your life in the future. Stories are not just filler and nice to have. They're literally how we pass down culture sitting around a campfire before we had written language. You know, you go into any elementary school and there's the craziest kids bouncing off the walls and then, Oh, when it's story time, they perk up and they're locked in. You got movies you saw 10 years ago and you can't recall the character names, but I bet you can recall the plot line or story. I started reading biographies like this one, total recall by the governor shoe dog by Phil Knight, the story of Nike and building that company. This one by Walter Isaacson, anything by Walter Isaacson is amazing. Steve jobs, controversial figure, but the whole thing doesn't just glaze him. It's like 600 pages of behind the scenes, how he built the first trillion dollar company. Also by Isaacson Da Vinci working my way through this guy about one of the most creative minds. And the main point is that his genius wasn't what propelled him forward, but it was his curiosity and that we have that same curiosity within us. If we pursue it and tap into it. And obviously you can go more on the nose with stories from fiction itself. So two that I read that I loved crime and punishments, little harder to get through, but I found definitely worth it. One I don't have pictured here is East of Eden. I'm working my way through that one right now. Nonfiction, pop psychology books have their place. I'm still a huge fan, but I think back to that Stanford study where 5% remembered stats and how to, and 63% remembered good stories. All right. If you're like most your screen times over six hours a day and it's so easy to default now to just scrolling whenever we're bored. But back in the day, we used to have to fill boredom with things we were interested in. As a kid, your parents put you in classes, or maybe you joined a sports team or it was a creative project or skateboarding that in between time where you're not at school, you're not at home, you're doing something. Now, if you get asked, what do you do for fun? I'm sure you have interests, but a lot of it goes to this guy. Or you ask the average person that and it's a movie they saw or a TV show they're watching or like a funny Instagram reel. For me, the biggest change was instead of spending more time on screens, I got hobbies, something you're doing just out of genuine curiosity because it's fun, not necessarily because it leads to a result. I think in the age of social media too, we've been conditioned to think that if things aren't productive for us or they can't be monetized, then there's no point. But what I've learned is that optimizes all the fun and excitement out of your life. I have found so much joy in hobbies, whether it's drums or dog training or gardening, the things you're doing outside of work and rest and that just make you more interesting as a person. So if you want to learn something you're curious about, but never done, one of my favorite ways to do it is to take a class. And that's where today's sponsor comes in Skillshare. If you're looking to reconnect with your creativity and maybe avoid brain rot, Skillshare is where humans come to learn from other humans. It has thousands of classes taught by industry pros and categories like content creation, music production, productivity, even tools to level up your career. Four years ago I took a class on how to speak confidently on camera by Nathaniel Drew and all the behind the scenes nuance of what goes into planning a video. How do you shoot to tell a story? Even the editing creative process, those lessons stuck with me and changed how I created. And if you've never done something, it can be overwhelming. So what I love about Skillshare is their feature called learning paths. These are curated classes designed to be taken in order for you to master a skill. So for example, if you wanted to start a YouTube channel, their learning path on content creation is designed to build on top of each other instead of getting overwhelmed by disjointed one-off videos you find online. So if you're looking to reconnect with your creativity or pursue a hobby that makes your life feel fun again, the first 500 people to click the link in the description or scan this QR code, we'll get a one month free trial to Skillshare. Now here's the next habit. This was some time ago. I was scrolling through my camera roll and found something that freaked me out. Like 60% of it was just screenshots of Uber Eats receipts or photos of my dog sleeping in 19 different positions, right? The thing that freaked me out is what was missing from my camera roll was me. And I don't mean in a narcissistic or self-centered way, but there were moments that I had lived with Danny where we went on a trip or I went home and was with my family or the people that mattered most. And the irony hit me that the dumb things I didn't care recording were living there forever. But the memories that I really wanted recorded were nowhere to be found. That was a couple of years ago. And ever since then I made this habit that I wish I had started way sooner. Start documenting your life. Easy one. Take more photos. Um, I'm not talking for social media so we can post them. I'm talking like things that you want to remember for yourself. I even got this camera as a single use item for the intention of just taking photos for myself. Whenever I pull out the phone, it kind of feels like work. So I like having a separate item that's just for documenting. Obviously this can be videos as well. So every single year I made a habit of sitting down with a camera and talking to it for 20 minutes. I like to cover the three biggest highlights of the year and the three biggest challenges of the year. How cool would it be if your grandparents had done that and you got to see, you know, when they were your age talking through life. Another way I love documenting is keeping a journal. Okay. And you know, this is great. If you're like camera shy or you don't want to be the person pulling out your camera everywhere, being as raw and real in your journal as possible. Those are the entries I look back on and mean a lot. Really at the end of the day, life is about moments. You might as well grab a few more of them. When I was younger, I used to take pride in how little sleep I could get. You know, give me five, six hours. I'm good. But when you hit 30 and older, that catches up with you real quick. Especially when you hear things like sleep deprivation can impair your cognitive performance at the same levels of being legally drunk and men who sleep less than five to six hours a night have the same testosterone levels as someone who's 10 years older. Some dudes are like, I'm asleep 16 hours. Got so many gains. So this habit is to protect and perfect your sleep because every single thing in your life gets easier when you're sleeping better. Now I'm no sleep expert, but here are the three best tips that really took my scores up into the higher range. Number one, falling asleep and waking up at the same time, seven days a week, your body runs on a circadian rhythm and it starts secreting melatonin when it knows it's time to go to bed. Irregular sleep schedules kind of give your body that jet lag feeling and it's really hard to be consistent. Everyone's different. But for me that's usually around in bed by nine and up around five or six. Number two, any light can suppress melatonin even with your eyelids shut. So you want to make sure you get blackout curtains or at least wear an eye mask. It's cheap. It's like 10, 15 bucks on Amazon. And I don't travel anywhere without this thing. And number three, ditching blue lights and getting yourself some of these. Again, another cheap Amazon purchase that made a huge difference. Basically blue light from your screens tricks your body into thinking it's daylight and it's really bad before bed. So I liked these so much. I even gave them out as Christmas stocking stuffers and my family loved it. Another hack I found super useful is to set up a shortcut. If you have an iPhone, it's the side button. I rig it to where if I triple tap one, two, three, see how it turns at red. And man, a couple hours before bed that makes a world of difference. So when we're talking about habits, I think there's equal benefits in not what you add in, but what you remove. And post 30 is the perfect time for you to audit your habits and ask which ones are sticking around longer than they need to. And the same way you can go out and hustle to make an extra thousand dollars or we could just not spend a thousand dollars and it's the same net benefit in your bank account. I think what you don't do gives you more confidence and energy. So for me, when I hit 30, I quit drinking. That was a huge thing that I was relying on. I felt like I had to alter my personality when I was in a group of people to be more likable. So I would just drink. And I noticed it started eating away at my confidence. I knew it wasn't healthy for me and I felt sluggish all the time. So when I hit 30 I did a 30 day experiment of no alcohol. Little did I know that would turn into something that has now been over 1500 days. And that one change allowed me to take my business seriously because I wasn't hung over all the time with like energy fluctuations. It allowed me to progress my relationship forward, get engaged, move here to Arizona and restart my life. So this habit is to quit something. And the point here is not to self attack and like judge yourself for it. We all have our thing. I have found when it comes to changing a bad habit, what doesn't work is shaming yourself into trying to change. What does is getting excited about the version of you who exists without that thing. So when I quit drinking, I was like who is that version that doesn't need alcohol to alter his personality? And that motivated me a lot. Like I'm like, I want to meet that dude. Practically I would just make a list this week of all your bad habits and don't try and quit all of them at once and say, okay, I'm never doing these things again. But just pick the biggest one that you know has overstayed its welcome. Put all your energy into experimenting with quitting that for 30 days and just getting curious on who the version of you is at this phase without that thing. Because a question that served me well when quitting is I asked myself if I could start over today, would I still choose to do this thing? And if the answer is no, then you got your answer. To close this out, this is one we don't talk about enough, but hands down it is the hardest part about being older than 30. There's been lots written about the loneliness epidemic that we're all facing. I think anti-social media plays a role, but when you look at studies like chronic loneliness can increase your early death at the same rate as smoking 15 cigarettes a day and then you look at other studies like Harvard's longest happiness longitudinal study they're doing and they say relationships, the quality of them in your life is like the biggest factor in your happiness. One thing I learned from my fiance, Danny is watching how close she is with the people in her life. I mean there is no question in their minds that she's there for him. She is always on the phone calling people. She's so good with relationships telling people what she appreciates about them. She'll even fly home 1400 miles and you know, attend their birthdays or bridal showers. I've always had friends. I think I lean extroverted and like people, but I've always had these packs of friends. I haven't had this one massive friend group that just, you know, we start and we end together and we do everything together. It's like I had my college pack of friends. Then I had the bands that I toured with. We got really close. And so when I had 30 I was really looking at my relationships like, man, I'm inspired by the way Danny treats people and how close she is with them. I wish mine were like that. But this one habit changed my adult relationships and that is be willing to go first. Going first means whatever you're waiting for someone else to do, you do it first. I realized I had been waiting for people to check in on me and see how I was doing, but I wasn't doing that to them. And it's so hypocritical because they could be thinking the same thing. Oh man, I wish Clark reached out to me more. I had friends here and I'm like, man, I wish they'd invite me to things. But I'm like, I haven't invited them to anything. I haven't made plans. Let me go first and reach out. And so practically for me, what I have done to go first is I made a list of 10 to 15 people that really like I care about their friendship. You know, they're coming to our wedding. They matter in my life and I just make a habit of calling them as much as possible. 15 times a day at 3am. I'll go on a long walk and I'll usually be on the phone with someone for like an hour. I mean, I talk to people now more than I did when I live 10 minutes away from them. Another quick tip I have is I think ego gets in the way of adult relationships. We think, you know, if they wanted to hang out, they'd reach out to me. If they wanted to, they would. Ditching all of that because life is just busy and not personalizing things is even more important when you get older. People's lives are full of work or family stress or kids. Now I have something I call the rule of three where I'm willing to go first and reach out three times. You know, if I don't hear back, I'll reach out again. If I don't hear back, I'll reach out again and I never take it personal. What happens if they don't respond after the third time? Then they're dead to you. Give it six months and reach out a fourth time. Like so many times, the thing we want is just blocked by our own ego and meaning that we've associated to it. The people you want in your life are probably waiting for someone to go first to let me know in the comments what your favorite one is or if you have a habit that helped your life improve after 30 and I'll link up right here. A perfect followup video to it, uh, that people seem to dig. So I'll see you in that one. Big thanks to Skillshare for sponsoring this video. I'll link down below where you can learn more about them. Stop settling, start living. Peace.