Stop waiting for the next big thing

Really? It's the song we automatically think is synonymous with Grootery, so you never know. Here's a question for you. Do you ever feel like life is just moving too fast? Do you feel burned out, disconnected? If so, you are not alone. Our next guest made it his mission to invest in joy and helping others do the same. So here to teach us how to beat burnout and train our brains and build a life that we love is the author of The Alchemy of Joy, Brent Freeman. Brent, thank you so much for joining us. Good morning. Thank you for having me. It sounds like a tall order right to do this this whole roadmap to peace thing but how do we start to make things better? You know it turns out it's actually a lot more simple than we think. Joy is not the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. It's actually just enjoying the pigments of color along the way. It's these micro moments that we get to choose to invest in every single day that oftentimes pass us by in the pursuit of this like elusive one day when i have enough time when i have enough money but truthfully joy is in the present moment it's that moment cuddling with your dog or just a moment of presence with your loved one looking in their eyes and really feeling you know their love those are the moments that make up this compound interest of joy gosh we have to have that attitude of gratitude and the little things that's one tip that you give you also urge us to stop or maybe catch ourselves when we go I'll be happy when that's right. Yeah, that's right. And, and, you know, we're, we're sold and told this when we, when we grow up, that once you get the house and the car and the spouse and all the things, then you'll be happy. And so we get into this pursuit of this one day and we defer our joy for that moment. And then when we get there, we realize that there's like the, at the peak of the mountain, there's a bunch of other peaks after that. And it turns out if we can enjoy each step along the way, and it doesn't mean everything is happy. I've been through a lot in my life and that's what this is about the alchemy of joy means the transmutation of hardships into joy how do we turn life's deepest hardships into some of the most beautiful moments and that's what this is all about is about learning to pause and stop and and really appreciate even the hard things along the way as we go through them you talk about this 60 second uh one minute window if you will what does that look and feel like yeah so i did a tedx on that and the one minute window is about becoming present. It's stopping, taking 60 seconds to become present with your body, catching your breath, taking a deep breath. Turns out our nervous systems are running on overdrive. Oftentimes we're running like we're driving at a hundred miles an hour in first gear and wondering why the car isn't performing. And so the one minute window is about stopping, getting present with your breath, slowing your breathing down, making the exhale become longer than the inhale. And then just seeing really zooming in on something around you. It could just be the wood grain on your desk or the look in the loved one's eyes or something like the light shining through the window in the morning and really appreciating it and then bringing up an elevated emotion like love or gratitude. And in 60 seconds, you can shift your entire nervous system and become present. And in your presence, that's where joy lives, even amongst the chaos of our normal lives, which we all have. You've already done that for me, just listening to you speak, honestly for about 60 seconds i can already feel the results you also encourage us to create our personal definition of success and i think this is a big one especially in the age of social media where there's so much comparison out there you have to come up with your own definition of what it looks like yeah we have a chapter in the book called about toxic comparison which is really all about it's the absolute value of your life right not everybody else's and what success means to could be very different for everybody else. And really it's about the fulfillment of being in the moment. Look, my mom died when I was seven years old and I was shown at an early age that we're not promised the destination. And so we have to enjoy the journey. And that's the message that the journey is the destination. And so the more we can start to understand that, enjoy the journey along the way, it doesn't mean we don't want to achieve or set goals or make money. All of that's really great but when we place our happiness on those things and only those things we really we don't see the sights along the way and that's where joy lives and that's really about the the alchemy of how to turn your life into something truly joyful no matter where you go or what you do all right brent thank you so much i have to get your book it sounds fascinating and also needed especially when we're in this whole hustle culture that we deal with kind of take a moment to breathe then settle into our joy because there's something and some of it for us along the way i appreciate your time thanks so much thank you marissa all right we'll be right back with more hopefully joy for you and news weather and more on Good Day DC see you on another