Mel B Gets Honest About Abuse

Please welcome my buddy, Mel B. Mel, let's talk about this book, because you didn't hold back anything in this book, and you highlighted the theme of abuse. Yeah. Why did you feel the importance of revealing everything so brutally honest? I just wanted to highlight that abuse is unacceptable, and I lived it for 10 years with my abuser, my then husband, and it's something that I felt very ashamed about, and I didn't think that anybody was actually going to believe me. So this book was a real... Really? Revelation for me, yeah. So one of the reasons you really don't come forward is because they won't believe you. So you feel like you'll get put on trial. You have to prove it. Is that what it is? And when you're in an abusive relationship, you don't want anybody to know that. It's very embarrassing, and you feel very riddled with shame and guilt. And when I left my abuser, I was wanting to speak about it loud and clear. I'm proud, like, this is not okay, and I'm one of the lucky ones. I got out, and it took me 10 years to find the courage to actually leave that behind. That's really good. Now, you're a mom. You've got three daughters. Yeah. 19, 11, and 7. Yeah. How did you prepare the girls for the stories that you revealed in your book? I mean, mainly my 19-year-old, because she was the one that, I guess, witnessed a lot of the verbal abuse and just the chip-chipping away that he would do at my confidence and integrity. And she said to me, Mom, you're going to have to speak about this because it didn't just affect you, it affects your kids, your friends, your family. Because one thing that an abuser does is they isolate from your immediate friends and family, so you have nowhere to turn. They chip away at you day by day, hour by hour, week by week, year by year. Let me ask you this. Before you got married, did you see any warning signs as you look back on it? Looking back now, yeah, there was every kind of warning sign, yeah. But, you know, the abuser finds you. You don't go looking for that. They find you when you're at your most vulnerable and they show up like Prince Charming and you think they're loving and caring and respectful and they couldn't be further from the truth. This isn't just my story. I've been and met lots of women that have experienced exactly the same abuse that I've experienced. And that's why in the back of my book, I do the 15 warning signs so that you know... What the red flags are, because we don't talk about it enough. You know, I want to make sure that my daughters know what an abusive relationship looks like. Right. What it feels like before they get into it. Right, because like you said, if you saw some warning flags looking back on it. But, you know, you wanted your heart to be fixed. And then, you know, when women don't trust their intuition, I'm a Christian. you pay for that every single time. Y'all's intuition is very real. That little thing y'all got is real. Thank you. Well, let's talk about a little bit more in the book because one of the high points in the book was you talk about your relationship with Eddie Murphy. You even call him the love of your life. Yeah. What's one of your favorite memories you can share? One of the things that was really... Like, touched me, is he's such a loving, caring, respectful person that when I came to write this book, I had to remind myself, look, I have had a loving relationship, and that was with Eddie Murphy, and we have a beautiful daughter to show it. It took a while to get there because we broke up, not in the happiest of circumstances, but... Why do you think the relationship didn't work out? It kind of was like two ships passing in the night that didn't quite, you know, find each other. It's like a sad ending to a beautiful love story, but we were madly in love. We've got a gorgeous daughter to prove it, and now everything's all good. That's good. Thank you. Well, let's talk about a little piece of big news. There's a rumor going around that Spice Girls are reuniting, and you're hitting the road. So our tickets went on sale, we only released six dates and we were all like waiting by the phone with each other going Are these tickets gonna sell? We really hope they do and the support and love was just overwhelming So we added another six dates and they've all sold out because they sell out in amazing Yeah, so it's gonna be it's gonna be a lot of fun next year It's like one chapter of my life is closing and then a beautiful other chapters opening up with my four ladies You all are Thinking about bringing the tour to America? Oh, I would love to bring the tour to America. I would love to, but we all have to agree. That's the thing right here. That is the thing. Get everyone's diary sorted. Listen, thank you so much for stopping by. This book right here, her book is called Brutally Honest, everybody, and it's available right now. Make sure you get a copy. Ladies and gentlemen, Mel B! Hey you made it to the end of this video. I got a lot more that you're going to enjoy so just click to watch the next one and make sure you subscribe to always know what's happening.