If you go down to the woods today....

We don't need the sticks just yet, but we're going to do with some tinder. So where are we going to get that? Oh, okay. Okay, that is a proper way to do it. Quite woody, but I'm sure this will take. Do you reckon? You reckon? Uh-huh. There's a woodpecker's nest there. Quite a big hole, so it's probably a green woodpecker. Because you hear them all the time over here, don't you? This looks like a half-decent hidey hole for fish. This rock appears to be raised up off the bed of the stream. So what I'm going to do is put my hands underneath the rock. and feel to see if there's any fish there, being very careful not to bash on the rock, wants to be as as subtle as possible. Nothing there but that's hardly surprising because we're only about 200 meters away from the river and the river is infested with otters. Did you? Am I doing it right? You're doing it a little bit too fast. They just... You've just got to be very, it's not that cold, it's not even autumn yet man. It is actually autumn now. Is it? Yeah. It's nearly October to head. Well, it's only just autumn. Oh, there's a fly dying. This doesn't help either. That's a heron feather. Heron's obviously been up here as well, so we're up against it today. Look at that. What do you think of that? It's quite a big pool as well, so if there's any fish in this little stream, there might be some in here. That's a wagtail. Do you know, I didn't recognize that at all when it was just from the front until I saw its long tail. There you go. When we were young, we used to come swimming down here. And we used to slide down all these little waterways on our backsides into these pools. This is like a little bathtub, this one. Look at that. Look how deep that is. Just worn away. I really want to go in there one day. You can go in now if you want. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Have a look at this, though. This is just the coolest thing. Look on the right-hand side of that little waterfall there. Whoa, that's so cool. Oh, it's deep as well. Whoa, it's like a cave. Go on, put your hand in and see how deep it is. It's almost like a rabbit hole in the stone, isn't it? Do you want me to hold it for you? Yeah. On the left-hand side, that's where we're supposed to eat. Oh, yeah. It goes to my elbow. Same. Just a shame that we don't live anywhere where there's gold. Imagine the gold that we'd be collecting in there. That'd be awesome. That's it. It's a freshwater shrimp. Oh, shrimp. Is that what you eat? Yeah. I suppose if you caught enough of them, you could eat them. Yeah. It takes some catching, though. Yeah. Took it back in then, James. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. It'll just be eating all the little flies and larvae and all sorts in and near the water. There it goes, catching flies, look. It's got something big like a sedge or something. Look, it does look a little bit like a face, I suppose. Yeah, eye, eye, mouth, or eye, eye. Yeah, probably that way is better, although it's quite a deformed-looking mouth. Yeah. Xbox 360. We're in the middle of nowhere. How on earth has that got here? Have a look at this. This is the second one of these that I've seen. Did you notice the one further down? I don't know what it is. I don't think it's a grave. Maybe a marker of some sort, but it's got W on it. West? Maybe? I don't know. Well, this is the other side. It's got H on it. So, WH or HW. Yeah, I thought it was West, but then it's not really like West and then East. West and East? I think it's just a boundary marker. Must be very old, that, though. Because this wood's been here for hundreds of years. Looks like a tick of some sort. I'll probably just wipe that off, James. Shall I fire it into the water? No, no, just put it on the grass. So it takes forever, yeah. Is it stuck? Yeah, well spotted. It's a proper slug family in there, isn't it? Good place for them to hide out during the day, though. Look at all them dirty little devils. It's full of them. What do you see here, then? Point it out. I, I, sad mouth. So a smiley face, sad face, sad face with hair. Even though you've given it hair, it still looks sad. Yeah. It's pretty cool, that whirlpool, isn't it? Yeah. Can I put my hand in, will it stop it? Well, have a go, it might. It's just a move of direction, that's cool. Let's go under the bridge then, see if there's anything cool under there. You never know, someone might have stashed some gold bars under there. Or some coke cans. Yeah, more than likely just rubbish. Oh, me? Echo! Echo! That's cool. You look like a monster. Spider's nest. Spider's nest. Dad, you look like a monster when you turn around and you're like, you don't look like a monster. You look like a zombie, mate. Remember the zombie video, mate? How do you do it? That was so funny. You look like a zombie, mate. Remember the zombie video, mate? How do you do it? That was so funny. That was so funny. I found a glass eyeball up here once. You know, like a false glass eye. Oh right, I know. Just up here I found it. Years ago I found a glass eyeball. It was blue, it was a lovely thing, but unfortunately I've lost it. It's a dude dolphin. That's like two miles away. No, but like to the surface of the surface. I can't find it anywhere. That's a mighty big chair. Don't fall off the end of there, whatever you do. Yeah, Fraser's higher than yours though, therefore she's more important. There's not that much of a drop off yours, is there? Karate master. That was easy enough and the tree hit me. What was that? Let me guess. Go on then, guess. 20 hours? Yeah, I think so. Oh, it was a best guess. Thank you. What's that one then? Hitching. You reckon? Yeah. Yeah, I would say you're right. The first clear track we've seen, isn't it? Apart from human tracks and dog tracks. Deer. Backside of its foot. Frontside of its foot. Travelling that way. It's a what? A hobbit cave. I feel like a dwarf actually. Yeah it is quite wet. You could probably line it out with the fir tree branches though and use it as a bit of a shelter. It'd be all right as long as the stream didn't rise suddenly in the night and wash you away. Right I'm not going to tell you where it is but can you show me where the deer go through the wood? There's a clue, they cross over the stream somewhere. They won't walk along the branch. Well you're not necessarily looking for footprints. You're looking for places where it's clear of vegetation on the ground, maybe? Yeah, there is tracks, is there? Exactly, they just come up right next to me. So it kind of goes from me down to you and then away up there through the wood. No, I don't think it is. It's just a bit that's dropped off, isn't it? I thought at first, I thought it was a dipper's nest because they make it out of like a big ball of moss. But I think that's just fallen down from up there on the bank sides, eroded. There's maybe been little wrens or something roosting in here. That's solid, that. It's just muck. It's not a nest. That looked, for all the world, like a dipper's nest, didn't it? Yeah. Careful you don't snap it, mind. Nice or not nice? What do you think? They look like nice ones. Not at the end, they're not. Not at the end, they're not. And I like when you're eating them. Yeah. But afterwards, they go weird. They're a little bit past their best, but they still taste quite nice. Purple. My mother and grandmother used to come here and get all the crab apples and make crab apple jelly out of them. Yeah. Well, like a jam sort of thing, you know? Yeah, try it. Yeah, they're quite sour. They're what? I don't like them. They're not very nice. Look in there, what looks like a white tree root. What is it? In the hole. Badgers have been trying to dig it out. But what is it? That's those frozen from 9 months ago in a big bag. No, James, don't go too close to it. Can you not see what it is? Is it like a wasp nest? It's a huge wasp's nest under the ground. A wasp? Yeah. Big, isn't it? I think we should just leave it. I think we should just leave it as well, yes. Proper hole, is it? Yeah, it goes in. Are you sure it's not that hole of um, what do you call them, what do you call them, Harry Potter? Ah, it's the Wonderland. Oh yeah. Seriously, seriously. Is it, you're going to fall down the rabbit hole? Okay. Eat the horrible apples. Holy, oh, that is dry. Your lips have gone, weeep. Yeah, that's what happens. Tension stance. So brace like that, and then pull away with your left hand. Okay. Okay, so that nothing gets disturbed. So when you hear... Wumpf, like that. Okay, I'll just throw sparks on there. Oh, a little spider is going to come up. They're pretty big sparks. They're a good one. We haven't managed to get it going yet, have we? Hey, there we go. That took some doing, didn't it? Maybe it's just gone odd. No, no, still throwing the sparks. I've never known it takes a lot. That looks awesome. It's like a bee. I take off each layer. Aw, Freya. You always set yours on fire. I used to always set mine on fire. Oh yeah. They smell deformed. I've heard something smell deformed. Seriously? Smells like marshmallow. They do smell deformed. They do. Beautiful. Absolutely awesome. Looks like a rabbit's kidney. What, so you've seen a rabbit's kidney before? Mm-hmm. Ew. Have we ever exploded a sheep? We tried to explode one but we couldn't get the matches to light because it was raining. I suppose rain does put out fire. Mm-hmm. Very good. That gets it going, doesn't it? Oh yeah! They smell different. Look at something smell deformed! Things are standing right in front of the camera. That is dry! I'm starting Purple. to They do smell deformed. speak That was easy enough. now.