THIS Will Protect You More Than a Prenup

[Music] brought to you by the every dooll app start budgeting for free today I am uh currently about to uh propose to uh my soon to be fiance and you know we have sat down and talked about a lot of the life goals and kind of how we want to raise our kids and how we want to manage our life and everything and sometimes we uh kind of butt heads on finances and um some times I guess I feel I'm I'm about 11 years older than she is and um have worked very hard to get to the point I'm at now and uh I worry about you know is there some steps that I should take from you know possibly getting a prenuptual agreement for assets that I have now and then also a big question on you know um I'm currently building a house and about to move into that and then if if we were to pay that house out of shared Finance but it's in my name it it kind of felt like Muddy Waters just something where to ever happen down the line and where we going a divorce or you know of course that's never the goal but just um how to approach that and uh make the best decisions going forward what's your net worth uh probably about 1.7 how old are you I'm 38 okay which makes her 27 right uh yes sir okay she about turn 27 all right how long you all been dating uh about a year and a half now okay all right what's the nature of butting heads over finances discussion um I guess when I think about kind of you know I had Balon property and held it for a while and now I'm building this house on it and just I guess going forward should I pay for the house and or should she help out she's just concerned because it's not in her name Orting heads over that yeah are you butting heads over anything else not a whole lot uh we have different thought processes on you know vehicles and I'm I'm more of a I've had a couple cars in my lifetime and she likes to lease cars and kind of do things that way and um I've always kind of been more over the I I'll drive a car for seven eight nine 10 years or or something before I change make a change okay um well here's what I want you to get to the bottom of in your pre-marriage counseling or pre-engagement counseling whichever one you decide to do okay um the house disagreement is a valid thing to argue about and we can talk through that in a minute that's let's set that to the side for a second um you don't borrow money you're a cheap skate and you drive a car forever and she likes new things and nice things and she doesn't mind going into debt right yes okay yes sir for the most part she's she is very good with her money but she no no she's not people who lease cars are by definition not good with their money it is the most expensive way to way to operate a vehicle and it's the inability and immaturity to say no to myself so I go buy whatever the flip I want because I'm an immature child that's who leases cars okay regardless if you're 53 or you're 27 because you just want to buy something it is the least down the least a month and the worst deal to get a new car that you can't afford so this is who leases cars so no she's not good with money but can we talk through that to her defense she she just recently purchased one about a like eight months ago because I I had kind of told her I was like man I feel like leasing money is is a good way to waste a lot of money but so I think she's trying to make good decisions but nowed her more no she bought she bought her last one and pay cash for but no no sir she has payments okay okay so I mean I'm resting my case here so here's the thing if I will not delay pleasure to win that is the definition of maturity so I'm willing to save up and pay cash for things I'm willing to drive things longer to get the full value out of them and pay cash for them thus you have a $1.7 million net worth and she's broke okay that's not to put her down it's to put her actions down all right and so that is what's concerning me about the marriage not your 1.7 and not who gets their name on the house because the number one cause of divorce in North America today is money fights and money problems you're not likely to have money problems but you are very likely to have money fights yeah because either she's a great lady which we suspect she is because you want to get engaged to her who has some minor adjustments to be made and needs to learn understand some things she doesn't understand about money and move along the Spectrum a little bit to move into wisdom or she's a freaking princess and you're going to spend the rest of your life trying to keep this woman happy yep she's one of the two I think it's I hope I think it's two the former no I'm going tell you why it's not you called us asking us if you should protect your money because deep down in the dark crevices of your mind when you're laying awake at night you are afraid that she might be a princess and and that's the truth I'm going to I'm just going to tell you you don't call and ask that there's a percentage chance well I didn't say she was going I'm saying he's worried that she might be and to your advice Dave Dave's advice is right I would do premarital counseling at to the nth degree and make sure that money are the first whatever sessions because I think you're worried and I think you have some justification as to why you're worried you guys are on opposite ends of the spectrum on money yeah so that that's what you've got to solve for the sake of your marriage and no prenup in the world will solve the disagreement that's right you got to get on the same page you got to get aligned right okay and that's that's your protection more than a prenup let's change the let's change the discussion and pretend we're at a different place okay Let's Pretend We're four months from now you guys have been through Financial Peace University together it gave you some material to which I'll give you as a potential uh engagement gift or whatever we call those things and so I'll give it to you for you two go through that together you two sit down with a pre-marriage counselor and work through this issue let's say you get through that and she's solid she's like I get it we're doing this okay you might look at a prenup more to protect you from her crazy relatives than her at that point because your net wor is okay it's not like through the root it's not like you got 10 million you got one and and but the house if you're going to ask a lady to share your bed her name ought to be on the deed correct right yeah she's right about that but you've got a reason for not putting it on there right now you got to solve for that reason as a marriage thing and then put her name on the deed and if you want to do a prenup or not it won't matter on the other stuff that's what I would do create your free every dooll budget today the simplest way to budget for your life