10 Biggest Regrets People Have Later In Life

The Biggest Regrets People Have Later in Life 1. Working Too Much How do you balance work and family time? You have a deadline to meet, and at the same time, you want to sit down with your family and have a nice dinner. It's tough. You always seem to worry. What will my boss and colleagues think? It's not a big deal if I stay late at work just this one time, right? I'll make it up to the family this weekend. But in reality, these make-ups never seem to happen. A few days turns into weeks, then months, and before you know it, time flies and you don't even know what's going on in the lives of those you say you care about. On the outside, it seems like working all the time will get you to the height of your career. But upon looking back, not many people say they wish they spent more weekends at the office. Working hard at the expense of a personal life is one of the commonly mentioned regrets among those who are aging. One palliative nurse stated that all the men she nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. As Dolly Parton said, don't get too busy making a life that you forget to make a life. 2. Trying to live up to parents' expectations Having a good relationship with your folks can be a really great thing. However, attempting to live up to their expectations, no matter the personal cost, is a huge source of regret in many people's lives. If you feel the same way, let us know by clicking the thumbs up button, and maybe leave a comment down below. Many of us get dragged into living the life that we believe a good daughter or son should live. Either because we're told outright, or simply because we unconsciously adopt it. We make certain crucial life decisions, about where to go to college, what course to study, where to work, where to live, because we think that it will please our parents. For some reason, our own happiness is obtained through their happiness. It's only after a decade or two that we find out that those around us are leaving us, and we've not really done the things that we've always wanted to do. Surprisingly, 35% of respondents admitted that they wished that they pursued more of the things that they wanted to do, and not just what others expected of them, according to the Alliance study. It's for this reason that so many people have a midlife crisis at 50. People often bend to the pressure of fitting into their family's or culture's expectations, and wonder if it was worth it. This is when panic sets in, and you look into the mirror and ask yourself, whose life am I living anyway? 3. Not trying to land that dream job you've always wanted Being turned down from a position at work always hurts. But what's worse in the long run, is never trying at all. You may have had circumstantial reasons why you didn't apply. It could be a child, your significant other didn't want to move to another state, maybe it wasn't really the perfect job for you, but at some point, you'll wonder how things would have turned out. What's life all about if not taking a leap of faith? Sometimes you swing and miss, but you have no regrets later on. According to the Alliance study, about 38% of the study participants revealed that they wished they'd taken more risks. He who is not courageous enough to take risks, will accomplish nothing in life. 4. Allowing their marriage to break down More couples would opt for divorce, then continue to stay together. And if you ask these people, they'll tell you that it was for the best. They couldn't handle it any longer. There's no doubt that there are marriages that aren't worth it, and divorce is for the best interests of everyone. But if you ask them privately, they'll tell you that they regret their marriage failure. It's never just one thing that leads to the end of a marriage, even if somebody is unfaithful. Normally, there are lots of signs and issues that build up to it. The regrets that these people have is that they didn't correct some or most of these small problems along the way. We can't control what our spouses do, but we can control our own actions and acknowledge deep down that we could have done better. In one particular study, conducted in 2016 by Avvo, 27% of women admitted to regretting their divorce, while 39% of men admitted the same. 5. Not taking enough care of their health and well-being Your health is one of those things that once you lose it, you can't get it back to what it was before. And for many people, this leads to a handful of regrets. The older we get, the more we feel disappointed about not taking better care of ourselves, especially when it comes to the kind of food we eat. It's quite right to assume that many would offer salads over fries or cheeseburgers if they could do things differently, considering the fact that diet is what's responsible for close to 678,000 deaths in the US alone every year. Not many people look after their health until a problem arises. A 1992 study published in the International Journal of Aging and Human Development reported that 13% of study subjects revealed that they regret not taking better care of themselves health-wise. And at that instance, we promise ourselves that if things turn out for the best, we'll take better care of our bodies. It shouldn't take a huge calamity for one to get the wake-up call that they need to make health and diet a priority. Small adjustments every day will have a significant difference in the long run. 6. Not keeping in touch with friends There's usually that one friend who you were very close to during your childhood, and even high school years. But then one of you moves away, or something similar happens. At first, you might have stayed in touch, but then later on, became too busy. We usually think of calling, or sending an email. But then we think that we don't have their number or email anymore. At some point, you wonder what it would have been like if you had a chance to have a cup of coffee and catch up. It's no wonder that we don't have enough time for social interactions the older we get. With things like work, family commitments, and trying to get in enough rest. But you should always try to maintain those friendships whenever you can, before you regret it later in life. It takes quite a while for people to realize how important their friends are to their well-being. When we're facing certain hurdles or obstacles in life, or want to celebrate something special, it's usually our friends who gather around us and support us. The long-term friends who know us really well, and share history with, matter even more as we age. 7. Not being a better parent There isn't a bigger legacy than your kids. They usually turn out great, and when they go through a certain hardship, there's nothing greater that makes parents feel guilty. And the moment they start showing signs of problems, either with school, or friends, and anything else, there's often been many years that have passed in which we could have probably handled better or spent more time with them. So many parents say that if they had a do-over when it comes to parenting, they'd do things a little differently. They would be more available, more understanding, allow them to learn from their own experiences, and so much more. No situation is ever lost, though. There will always be a chance to better the relationships you have with your children. But it can't be pushed aside any longer, especially if it's a relationship that has been forsaken. 8. Not standing up for yourself Assertiveness is a skill that so many people sadly learn too late in life. It may come as a surprise, but one of the things that people regret the most is what happened to them in grade school, or at some other early age. People never seem to forget or forgive themselves for not speaking up against bullies. We're just too afraid. We wish we'd been more confident and stood up for ourselves. Failing to stand up for yourself or what you believe in oftentimes results in being a major regret among those who aren't confident enough. Bullies are not just restricted to high school or middle school. Some people deal with bullies even in their places of work. It may be their boss or their colleague. People often look back at what happened at some point and wish that they'd given them a piece of their mind, even if it risked getting them fired. 9. Quitting school Although the idea of sitting in a classroom and taking tests does not appeal to most people, missing out on having an education is actually a major source of regret for many later in life. Life without a high school diploma is tough for most people. Having to take up a number of jobs isn't always enough to pay the rent, bills, gas, and the like. Even those who try to enter college later in life find it difficult because colleges think that if they couldn't complete high school, the same would happen if they enrolled in college. Research published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin in 2008 stated that education was at the top category in which study subjects cited regret compared to others like romance, career, self-improvement, leisure, and parenting. 10. Not leaving a legacy It's difficult to know what others will say about you when you're gone. But many people still admit that not contemplating their legacy was a serious oversight. Whether you wish that you had kids, or you did something that was beneficial to the planet, or simply been a nicer person, the notion that people might have not-so- fond memories of you, or worse yet, no memories of you whatsoever, can fill a person with regret. But it's not too late. Even at 50, you still have plenty of time to change your legacy for the good. Of course, there are so many other regrets people have later on in life. Like breaking up with the person you think was the love of your life, not doing enough to give back to the community, missing out on those little moments, not taking advantage of your youth, not going on enough vacations, or even failing to see someone before they passed away. But at the end of the day, that's life. Things happen no matter what you do. So, instead of gravitating around the things you regret doing, look back and think of the great memories and experiences you had. Well, that's it for today's video. Thank you guys so much for watching. And if you enjoyed it, please do give it a thumbs up. And if you have a topic you'd like us to make another video on, leave it down in the comments below. We love hearing your feedback, and even more, we love helping you out. With all that said guys, have a great day, and I'll see you all in the next one. Transcribed by https://otter.ai