Top 10 Bengaluru | Max Amini | Standup Comedy

This guy's wearing sunglasses inside. How cool are you? He said I'm sitting in front of a star is too bright, buddy Aren't you so gay Now put back your sunglasses For the star to stop being bright Like no, I didn't like what you said the start is dim now Hi, how are you? It was your name? Okay, never mind but nice to meet you are you here for the show are you here from the government? Because you haven't even smiled once you came to the show to hypnotize me I Love you Who's the lady next to you Your daughter you brought dad. Yeah, did you tell him it's a comedy show? He thought it's a murder mystery Dad you still not laughing and guess what? I don't give up pushpa Jukka got my heat I Don't give up dad You're gonna laugh tonight dad. Yes, let's go What a nice shirt, huh? Wow, you look like a chandelier. I Am here to shine Good for you And the chandelier, what do you do? You're a doctor Nice What a bright doctor Can I ask you a favor turn around and talk to dad see what's the problem Check his blood pressure He finally smiled at I guess I need a doctor You're single too, sir. Nice to meet you man. What do you do? you work in Accenture what is that? IT just say IT You're not into IT, but you work at an IT company what a tough life Yeah Good for you, man. Good for you. You're wearing sandals to my show You didn't even bother to wear shoes, huh? Nice sandals, by the way. Yeah, are you comfortable if you want you can take your pants off Very comfortable, he's literally wearing his pajamas you dressing like that and this lady wearing a chandelier This lady wore her outfit to Max Amini's wedding and you come in sandals Even dad is disappointed about a bad idea. I Don't like it So when you drive you take the sandals off Yeah That's wonderful listen if you wear a pair of shoes you probably get a girlfriend You go say hello to a girl she looks at your toes. Oh She's like no, thank you very much. I Don't need those toes in my life. Look that lady's laughing so hard. She saw you in the line or what a big toe big toe Small personality What about the guy next to you you're not with him He's your best friend. He's a good-looking best friend, isn't he? That's friend. How long you've been trying to ****? How long have you been trying my friend body What's your name? Troy tell us For eight years you've been trying to You're a persistent man Every day you call her push pop to cook on the heat Salah This guy's not gonna back down Eight years, huh? Wow, it's a long time. So you've been jerking off for eight years You guys should become friends Are you also wearing sandals? Oh It's gonna be an awkward drive home So have you been really trying for eight years? Well, I tell you I didn't even buy shoes I've been saving money for our wedding So, how come you never said anything? Huh? What the **** is that? Do you have Tourette's What did you mean by that Explain yourself You don't think it's gonna happen It could happen. I've seen it happen people that have been friends for many many years got married. It's happened Yeah, who's the guy next to you? Yeah Well, he could break up with you at any time Parallel universe To say These people just arrived Hi Come here. Come down here. Come I got seats for you. What happened? You guys are so late You made everybody get up to cross you assholes Where are you sitting? Where are you going? What the **** are you doing? No wonder you're late You don't even know how to walk in the theater let alone drive in the streets of Bangalore I've never seen this more selfish audience. Oh my god You got you made everybody get up because he didn't want to go around. That's how this this is the guy in traffic Blocking everybody So what happened, you know, you know what time it is man the show started at 830 right now 936 show is ending in four minutes This next four minutes. I'm only gonna roast you So you get your money's worth Do you guys love me? Do you really love me? That's why you came late you asshole There is a blind guy in the front row He loves me He's only blind because the shining star on stage Destroyed his eyes But you don't know what we're talking about because you live in a parallel universe But tonight you're not going home There is a father here That's gonna take you to his house and he's gonna punish you so badly Yes, you're wearing shoes Take it off. Oh my god What's that you have to rest too listen if you say something say it last I can hear you go ahead Oh Sandals, oh I should wear sandals. I don't have this problem You're so right Ladies so nice. Hi. What's your name? Hyacinth pleasure. How old are you? She's nine hundred and seventy years old You guys are married or single Oh Married ----. I Only date 60 and up So I thought you might be single as my lucky day, but no In the moment you're single In the moment I am single that's 70 years of experience right there She knows not to miss an opportunity She's so beautiful she doesn't even cover her hair that's what I like about her Everything is white upstairs downstairs Yeah, you sure that's your seat Yes They're gonna come Yeah, so you two are not together She sat right there. She goes. Oh What happened I said you sure that is it she goes oh ---- we got caught Hilarious No, you come sit next to your guy. Don't be shy. You're so sweet If you're gonna get caught you get caught both of you at the same time. Yeah So you guys came later on dude, you know, you're 40 minutes late. What's your name? Suraj you drove you came by taxi. Why don't you come sooner you you live here? Yeah Don't don't This guy trying to I love you so much. Don't love me right now If you love me you would have came like these half of these people came on time. Are you in technology to? Your doctor you do surgeries to Thank God you don't do surgeries Everybody would have been dead on the bed Suraj is on the way in the taxi Patient on the table Suraj is very emergency. Where are you? Tell the patient I love you Tell the patient I see him on the other side Your wife is beautiful what a nice wife Hi, do you? She's your friend friend friend friend Doctor you married Your wife is sitting behind Hi What a nice wife What's going on here Who is this lady who is this bench? Oh Wife you let this guy sit next to this lady like that. Why are you sitting there? You were you came early with a different taxi and he came with his girlfriend Huh You didn't see kiss. Ah, when you buy your tickets, there was no seats together. So everybody got it's okay You don't need to sit next to each other. This is a family matter, you know, it's very calm I didn't know you guys are this open-minded in Bangalore The wife is like I bought different seat go I Watched it. So Okay, so are you single? Yeah That's your husband that's the husband hi husband good luck This doctor is very slick, huh? Okay, it's okay well nice to know you guys so you both married both of everyone's here it's okay Just make sure you go home separately. Yeah That's wonderful buddy, so what's your name? do towel do towel I Put it up the second time say it loud The Punjab was easier to tattle to tattle to tattle Do tattle to tattle He goes. Yeah But you know, it's crazy. You guys are together. No, then how do you know his name? So well It takes a week to learn to tattle to tattle You already knew so do tattle what are you doing in Bangalore you live here? You live in Japan you just came to see my show from Japan Hold on a minute from Japan You came to see my show You know in next week. I'm performing in Japan You didn't know He's like I wasted all my money You know what? I love of the whole world. You chose India to come and see the show. That's very cool, man Do total is my special guest tonight This is so incredible. He came from Japan to sit. Hold on. Hold on Let me say this. Hey you guys. Yeah This guy flew from Japan To see me. He's on time You live right up the street Came from Japan to see me the Indians are late No, I'm Iranian, I don't know if you know that about me I'm Iranian ladies anywhere seats are empty This is good. Sit here in the middle. Yes it is. Good. Good. Thank you for coming on time. This is such a good timing You missed a lot but it's okay you catch up your sisters. Okay. No, I'm talking to my Japanese friend Have you ever met a Japanese before? Are you single? You're single nice Japan You like sushi So does he He can make the sushi The total did you know in India they have chicken sushi You don't even have chicken sushi in Japan Indians are like no problem. We make it and It's spicy Spicy chicken sushi That's the power of India. Don't make anything happen Definitely meet him after the show very on time. Nice guy you together. You're late. He's on time. You guys make it happen Yes Yes, of course I always do that yeah, and I'm very good at matchmaking I match made two people in Los Angeles They got married six months after I won one person this side of the stage one person the other side I connected them They got married Yeah They had the lady got pregnant a year later. They had a boy. They named the kid Max Isn't that amazing you too Max jr. Okay The turtle I'll be the godfather You just came from Thailand to see my show that is so sweet of you Wow That's so sweet. What's your name? Gone, that's such an easy name gone. I love that and that's your daughter Yes, your younger friend That's a little weird But in Thailand is cool, huh? Nice to see you you're so beautiful if you're in danger blink twice If you've been kidnapped and brought to India in the name of Max I mean you show Is that how she tricks you? She said she's my younger friend 20 years difference good for you Wow Thailand they have fun. Hello What does she do? She bring it to banga banga bangalore