Laughs Without Borders _ Max Amini _ Stand Up Comedy

Where are my Europeans? Europeans, clap. Only Europeans, yeah? What about you? What country? Italy! Nice! What's your name? Pia. Just one Pia? Or two Pia? Very Italian. Like you put your hand in your pocket and you go, oh, you did some spaghetti. Who's next to you? Martina. Martina, is she also Italian? Greek! I said Greek, you said Australian. Okay, you don't want to talk about your nationality? It's fine. No, it's fine, ma'am. Be Australian. Yeah? You're amongst a bunch of immigrants. And you try to play it cool? Australian. Have you seen the unibrow on your face? Your eyebrows are fighting with each other as I'm speaking to you. Who the hell are you? Who are you? **** you, **** you. I kill you, I kill you, I kill you, I kill you, I kill you. I destroy you. I destroy you more. Australian. You smell like lamb shank from over here. Greek ladies, all of a sudden, Australian. Be proud of where you come from, man. Yeah, be proud of who you are. One more European country, we'll move on. Where? Germany? Oh, my God, you live here now? Oh, that's wonderful. Are you married? Where is he? Is he German? Oh, God, no. That's amazing, this lady. Yeah, nobody wants to marry a German guy. So, you married an Australian? Aussie guy? Tall, big, handsome? No? Short, bald, ugly? Well, thank you for moving here and taking one of them. Meet one more person. Buddy, where are you from? Amazing country. And your lady is from? Oh, you're Aussie, Aussie? Oi, oi, oi? This is sexy. Dude, you came out here, you scored this? Yo! Yo! You did good, man. Do your West African friends know about her? You send a picture, they're like, oh, oh, she's beautiful. How long have you been together? You're not together? How ******* awkward. You should have said, I'm not with her, you're like... Like, you send a picture to your friend, she's like... Well, meet each other. You're single? You're like, yes, I am single. I have four wives back in... West Africa. It doesn't count, they're in Africa, yeah. But you're single? Yes? What's your name? Jessica, what kind of man do you like? What kind of characteristic in a man do you like? Kind? He looks kinder than a ************. All you care about, a guy being kind? Would it help if he's from Africa? You're gonna have fun tonight, bro. Who's single? Clap, let me see where my single people are. Yes, sweetheart. I know, I saw that. What do you want me to do? What's your name? Tahmina. What kind of man you're into? Give me some characteristic. You want good guy. You know what your problem is? A lot of you, you too, yeah? You guys don't know what you're looking for. Bodybuilder. Bodybuilder? Who said that? You want a bodybuilder? Oh, you got one? Then shut the **** up. This girl's bragging. I'm helping this desperate... This lady. She's like, find me, find me. You want a bodybuilder as well? Stand up, sir. Let me see. Oh, look at that guy. Your boyfriend is a whore. Immediately he got up for this lady. You know why? You want a bodybuilder? They have big muscles everywhere, but where they need to have it. And that guy is... All the muscle goes everywhere else. Hello. Hi. I am good guy. I am very good guy. I'm here to say hello. You like good guy? You're welcome. But you get a skinny guy? All the muscle goes there. Say hello to my West Africa. Laugh. This lady is concerned. Oh, my God. The bodybuilder is gonna kill everybody. It's okay. He can't run. He's got so much muscle. Good guy. I find you. Huh? Yeah, good. This lady knows something, you know? I need a rich man. She knows what she wants. No problem. You know what you want. Gold digger is awesome. What do you want me to... Shed digger? I'm digging for shed. Oh, I found him. He's right there. Men have to remember you have to work hard, yeah? So you can play hard. Or, you know, I say a lot of life lessons in what we're talking about. But I really encourage you. Think about who you want in your life and write it down. Have it in your notes. Talk about specific things. Say, I want a man who's honest. I want a man who's spiritual. I want a man who's this. You give, like, examples that you really care about. So when that person comes in your life, you know, this is the guy. Yeah? Hold on one second. I got distracted. Talking about the list.