BE A GODLY WOMAN

Genesis 2, going back, man alone is insufficient. The only thing that was not good about creation is that Adam was alone. And so God created a woman to compliment, a woman to be a full reflection of the image of God. I love the Hebrew word ezer k'nigdof, a helper suitable, the missing puzzle piece. A helper suitable Not to dominate or lead but to be by his side as an indispensable teammate. Marriage is teamwork. And this western mindset, we get so caught up in the individual roles and accolades and comparisons. But we're each, both genders, to serve the family before God as best as we can. And it's a beautiful thing that God created a helper suitable for Adam. So the Proverbs 31 woman is home-centered. But really all of us should really be prioritizing our homes. What's the best place, the most, what should theoretically be the easiest place to make disciples? The home. But I love the example of the Proverbs 31 woman because she took care of her home, but we also see she buys some land, she plants a vineyard, but she did not do those things to advance herself. Even in the business outside the home, it was always to bless her family. She was a good steward of what God had entrusted to her. The way I like to think about it, and the way that I think it can help us understand this, is that she did what was needed for her family. It's doing what is needed when you have that perspective. We can get all in the weeds of the roles and what you do, but if you have the perspective of, I want to do what's needed for my family. The dictionary definition of help is to do something that makes it easier on the person you are helping. Now listen wives, we do not help our husbands to make his life easier and our life harder. We help our husbands carry the load so that we both can go farther and do more for the kingdom of God together. And so we do what's needed. We are a godly helper, vitally important, a powerful support. God knew exactly what he was doing in creating both male and female, and how they would work together and bring this beautiful harmony into this world. It was a purposeful design that we would complement each other so well. It's really cool to look at the differences and see the beauty in it, and to celebrate it. That both are reflections of God, both created in the image of God, both needed in our world. We need strong men and we need strong women, right? Paul says in first Corinthians chapter 11 verse 3 that the man is the head of the woman, and consequently the head of the home. The woman, listen to me ladies, husband's the head, but you know what the woman is? She is the heart of the home. Now, I think a lot of women struggle with what does it really look like to let your husband lead? The first thing is this, speak to him with respect. Proverbs 18 21 says death and life are in the power of the tongue. Your words matter. Here's what scripture says quarrelsome words can lead to, some result of harsh words. Matthew 12 says it can lead to regret and condemnation. Proverbs 15 says it stirs up anger. Proverbs 13 says it brings ruin. Proverbs 18, offense and separation. Proverbs 25, it brings bad reputation. Words are powerful, and I believe the words of a wife over her husband are extra weighted. Like we can tear down our husbands unlike anyone else, but that means we also have the ability to build up our husbands, to speak life over them unlike anyone else can. See, I want to read you what scripture says the power of kind words are. Proverbs 16 says they are healing to the bones. Job 4 says they strengthen. How many want strong men? Proverbs 15 says they turn away anger. Proverbs 31, teach kindness. Proverbs 12, make a heart glad. We can build up our husbands and how we talk to them. I'm thinking of probably what I would say the two most important phrases that we should be saying to our husbands often, and the first one is thank you. Thank you from the smallest little thing to the biggest thing, and no but after, you know? Can you just say thank you? Thank you. What you're doing is you're choosing gratitude. You're choosing, you're choosing to focus on the good thing. It changes your marriage because it changes your perspective and gives you a grateful heart. The second thing I think is really powerful to speak to our husbands is the phrase I'm proud of you. I think many men today would say they have a very deep desire to be the hero for their wives, to be the heroes for their children and their family. And I would bet if we asked the men and they were very vulnerable, they would tell you that they often feel like they fall very short of that. And so when we tell them that we're proud of them, we are proud of them despite their weaknesses, despite their shortcomings, despite their past failures, but we say I'm proud of you. I'm proud of the good in you. I'm proud of the man that you are. What we're doing is we're helping them to release some of that weight and that pressure that they feel that they are never enough. We are speaking life over them. What's it say in Ephesians 5? Love your wives. Ladies need love. Respect your husbands. Guys need respect. If you'll show, ladies, respect to the man, he will show you love. If you show men love to the lady, you will receive respect from the ladies. So it's this circle though, but what happens, there's a whole book written on it. I don't feel loved, so I'm not going to respect him. I don't feel respected, so I'm not going to love her. And you just end up in the death spiral, on and on and on and on. So somebody's got to break it and say, I'm going to show respect. But here's the way, ladies, you show respect, by him being respectable. Okay? Encouragement is the most powerful from those who know you the best. Okay? Somebody really knows you and really encourages you, that's gold. And that's what's to happen with a husband and a wife, isn't it? Be a kind speaker of words. And let that come out, because you're wise enough to do that. She never uses her words to destroy, but you see, it's always about building others up, building her children up, building her husband up. And it begins with her husband. Let me tell you something, ladies. Just a pat on the back every now and then. Okay? Just something that's sweet about what it is that your husband is trying to do. Just an arm around their shoulder or a kiss on the way out saying, you know, I believe in you. I believe in what you're doing. And I know it's hard sometimes. But we're on the same team. I have faith in you. You'd be surprised what that'd do for a man. This woman in Proverbs 31 was not only strong, but her mouth was filled with wisdom and kindness. She was kind in her speech. She was not always backstabbing, cutting down, and criticizing her children and then her husband. The law of kindness. Kindness ruled her speech always. She's giving to others that she loves. And isn't that what love is all about? Isn't that the example Jesus Christ gave for us? Well, of course it is. Along with this, she's wise. It's a Proverbs 31 woman. She's wise. And praise God that it says that she opens her lips with wisdom. Because she's not just wise, but she is sharing that wisdom. It's really important for us to create avenues to listen to wise women. The heart of the Proverbs 31 woman, it's not charm, not beauty. It's fearing the Lord. Fearing the Lord. Fear the Lord. That's the beginning of wisdom. I love in Proverbs chapter number 31 in verse 30, Proverbs 31 is a chapter that's dedicated to women. And it says charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised. This Proverbs is talking about the significance, though a woman is beautiful and though a woman has charm, the best thing that a woman can do to influence the world and to influence society is to be close to Jesus, is to follow and obey the commands of Jesus, have intimacy and a relationship with Jesus. Because when you have that intimacy and a relationship with Jesus, you can use that influence for good in so many ways. And what does the scripture say fear of the Lord is? Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. That's why you surpass everybody else. It's because you fear the Lord and that makes you wise. You have his understanding and you have his insight and you apply that to your life personally and to your family and to the to the business interactions that you're involved in. You apply the fear of the Lord to all that you do for women, whether they are married or single or widowed with or without children, I pray that God will bless you.