Russian Podcast #6: The "Unspoken" Rules of Russian communication

Hello everyone Welcome to my channel My name is Alina and I am your Russian language teacher Welcome to my new Russian language podcast Today we will talk about things that often interest foreigners You may already know cases aspects of the word words of motion Russian communication is not just about language It is a cultural code These are the unknown rules that we all know from childhood but we have never talked about them So today you will learn how to communicate better with Russians I will be speaking in Russian throughout the video so don't forget to enable subtitles in English or Russian Are you ready to learn more Then let's begin Part 1 Introduction So you meet a Russian person First what you may notice is that we don't smile at strangers This doesn't mean we're mean A smile is just valuable currency for us And we spend it only on friends acquaintances and people we like I talked about this in detail in another podcast titled "Why Russians Don't Smile " If you missed it you can listen to it here So don't be surprised if everyone in the subway or the store has serious faces Next physical contact How do we greet each other Men usually shake hands with each other This is a standard greeting when meeting acquaintances friends and colleagues but sometimes even strangers in the same company Women do things a bit differently Usually we just greet each other with words but if you end up among familiar friends Prepare for hugs and maybe a cheek kiss Of course it all depends on the person For example my best friend she doesn't like physical contact She doesn't like to be hugged so we never do that when we meet her Here the most important thing is to respect each other and respect the other person's wishes Next address by full name This is one of the most important points First name plus patronymic is a sign of respect for a person Usually to someone older than you or of higher status Boss doctor professor For example I am Alina Alexandrovna or Aleksandr Sergeevich Until a person themselves suggests that you switch to using "you" and address them by their first name It is better to always use the form "name plus patronymic" If you do not know a person's patronymic You can always ask "What is your patronymic " or "How should I address you " "How should I address you " is the best question Which you can ask when getting to know a new person Next is personal space and eye contact Russians greatly value personal space so you don 't need to get close to someone you're talking to A distance of one meter is considered standard At the same time it is very important to look into each other's eyes A direct but not aggressive gaze – This is the best way to show that you are interested in the person and in this conversation There are even funny videos on the internet The ones I see from foreigners who come to Russia start living here Here is such an example I really like this video Maybe it's a bit exaggerated but it really does happen that way sometimes When we talk to someone we look directly into their eyes and for us this is normal of course in lines and public places You can forget about personal space This is the harsh reality of megacities and large cities Part 2 Hospitality and Gifts This is my favorite topic We love visiting others We love hosting guests in our home In general the home is a very important place in the life of every Russian person So if a Russian person invited you to their home it means for sure that you like them But you should remember these rules when visiting a Russian person Rule number one the most important Always take off your shoes when entering In Russia it is hygiene and respect for the cleanliness of the home Slippers will always be waiting for you in the entrance hall or corridor This is a normal situation For example I have disposable slippers at home For guests who come to me rarely and also there are personal slippers for those who come to my home often My family or my friends Don't be surprised this is normal for many Russian homes I'm not the only one like this Next don't come visiting with empty hands What can you bring A good cake a box of candies éclairs or any other sweets Also alcohol usually wine Because a bottle of good wine is always appropriate Of course you can joke about vodka Because all Russians drink vodka but no not all Russians drink vodka Therefore wine or beer is better But if you think you will only eat what you brought as a gift that's not true The table will already be ready for your arrival And there will be many different dishes on it We really enjoy setting the tables preparing a lot of food And we love gatherings sitting in a large group at the table and talking Also we love to make toasts But I think not all Russians like to give toasts For example I hate doing it but it's a tradition And even if I don't want to make a toast it needs to be done Usually one person speaks and they usually stand up All the others at the table are listening If it is an important event such as a birthday or wedding then the toast is usually long But if it's a regular meeting of friends acquaintances or family then you can just say a few words Cheers to the meeting to health For parents for the hosts for the guests anything at all The main thing is sincerity When the toast is said everyone clinks glasses We call this clinking to clink After that you must definitely drink from the glass At the table we behave politely We don't make any noises and we don 't talk with our mouths full of food Well it's just a matter of etiquette Part 3 Behavior in Public Places Now let's go outside How to behave in public transport in the subway bus and tram Or in our favorite minivans First Give way A harsh but important rule Always give way to elderly people pregnant women and passengers with young children This is not just politeness it is a social obligation Also try not to speak too loudly Russian people on public transport are quite quiet They are resting sleeping reading or listening to music through headphones Next If you are standing in line at the hospital in the store Be prepared to stand your ground In Russia it's not customary to cut in line If you 're unsure who is last in line Just ask out loud who is the last one who is the farthest This is a magical phrase Which determines your place in the queue And remember the most important rule in Russia is sincerity Yes our faces may seem serious we may seem angry But as soon as you overcome this first barrier You will find very warm hospitable and kind people Meanwhile don't be afraid to make mistakes A Russian person will always appreciate your attempt to understand his culture and language And that's all I hope you understood everything Tell me in the comments which illegal rules surprised you the most Thank you for watching Subscribe to my channel and learn Russian with me