10 _Normal_ Things I Stopped Doing Since Simplifying My Life.

Decluttering my home was already a great step towards simplifying my life, but what surprised me most was that the biggest clutter actually wasn't in my home. It was in my habits, my mindsets, and just the way that I was used to doing things. As I got further into my journey with simple living and slow living, I noticed something unexpected. And that was that I didn't just add some calmer routines to my life, but I also stopped doing a lot of things that most people would consider to be completely normal. And these are also things that I just did without questioning them, because I figured that they're just a part of life. And the funny thing is that I didn't consciously decide to stop doing them, they just sort of naturally fell away as my life became more simple and intentional. So today I'm sharing 10 normal things that I stopped doing ever since I simplified my life. And maybe some of these will resonate with you too. As always, feel free to grab yourself a cozy drink if you want and join me. I have some tea right here. And this video is also kindly sponsored by Skillshare, which I will tell you more about later. The first thing I want to talk about is that I stopped wasting my evenings and my weekends. And overall, I just kind of stopped wasting my time on meaningless activities. Now you may know about me, I'm not really the kind of person who feels like we need to be productive all the time. In fact I never make productivity related videos, because I feel like while there is some value in it, there are more important things in life than how much we are producing. Of course there are things that we need to do, cooking, cleaning, laundry, all of that. But I also feel like it is important to do things just because you find them fun or enjoyable, and also to have enough moments of intentional rest and relaxation. So one saying that I've always really loved is, time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time. And that I think is the key difference. Time you enjoyed wasting. And so I noticed that the way that I spend my evenings, my weekends, and my free time has really changed over time. And it became so much more meaningful and intentional and valuable. It's really easy to fall in the habit of coming home from work or school or chores or whatever it is, and just kind of you're feeling too tired to basically do anything else. You're just scrolling on your phone or maybe watching a show you don't really care about that much, or just vegging out on the couch. And looking back, this was me. I spent so many evenings and weekends and so much time just watching shows that I really didn't care about that much. And I was just kind of too tired or not mindful enough to notice how much time this was costing me and how little I was getting for it in return. After simplifying my life, I became quite painfully aware of how much time I was wasting on meaningless stuff. And I became much more intentional about making the most of my free time. And I started making time for my hobbies, for things that I actually enjoy, and also for rest. But more so deep rest or intentional rest, not just vegging out on the couch. Because I think there's a very big difference between actually resting and just kind of numbing yourself because you're too tired or overwhelmed. And the key thing for me has been kind of separating my mood from my activities. So I started realizing just because I've had a tiring day or a difficult day, doesn't mean that I then have to spend my evening mindlessly scrolling on my phone or not really doing much of anything at all. Of course I take my mood seriously and the amount of energy I have, but I can still do something good with it. Like maybe do some gentle yoga, or read a book, or play a game with my partner. Maybe we'll have a cozy movie night and instead of just randomly watching something on the couch, we make it extra cozy. We have tea, we have maybe a little snack, we light some candles, we consciously pick a movie that we really want to watch, and we make it into like a nice cozy evening. And maybe if I want to relax on a Sunday, instead of just scrolling on my phone, I bake a bread, and I read my book, or I make time for a creative hobby, drawing on my iPad, or I do something else like some nice yummy stretches, or I go for a walk. Things that I actually enjoy and that help me to feel like I've not wasted my entire Sunday. The second thing that I stopped doing is over scheduling my weekends. While before I was wasting a lot of my free time, I've also always been someone with many different hobbies and interests. Places I want to go, friends I want to see. So something else that I often did was over scheduling my weekends. And it took me an embarrassingly long amount of time to fully notice this, and to accept about myself that I was living a pace that I could not keep up. And to feel okay about protecting my downtime. So what I started doing is, if I have plans on a Saturday, then I will try to keep my Sunday free. And I used to feel bad about it, I used to feel guilty about it, but now I've just accepted that this is very normal and actually a really good thing to do. What often happens, especially if you are a bit of a people-pleaser like I am, is that we tend to give up our time very easily. So if someone asks us do you have plans on a Sunday, and there's not actually something scheduled in your calendar for that day, then that means you're free. And so we end up doing something on that day anyway. When now I don't treat empty time in my calendar as free to fill up, I treat it as something to cherish and protect. And to use my free Sunday for healing, for resting, for emptiness, for silence, or for inspiring hobbies. Whatever I feel like I'm in the mood for. And it is not something to just fill up with anything else, it's actually something to protect. And I treat it as an appointment with myself. In my experience, through the process of simplifying, we get to know ourselves much more deeply, on a deeper level. And we start to really notice what we need to feel happy, and to thrive, and to feel healthy and energized. And I've really learned about myself that as a very sensitive person, who also has experienced burnout before, my energy is not limitless. I have to make sure that I have enough downtime, and really be mindful about that. Another very normal thing that I naturally kind of stopped doing, is rushing. Especially when it comes to chores, like being at the supermarket. For a very long time, I treated my chores as something to get through as quickly as possible. So I went to the store, I quickly got everything that was on my list, and I ended up feeling kind of a little bit stressed and tense the entire time. Especially if the supermarket is crowded, or if they just kind of like put things in another place that I was used to. But I've learned that slowing down is actually a really big part of simple living. And that by constantly rushing, I was unnecessarily adding stress to my life. So now when I go grocery shopping, I take my time, I just walk around a little bit, and I don't think about how much time it's costing me. And to be honest, I don't think that it does cost me that much more time than how I used to do it before. Maybe like five minutes longer. As Phil Dunphy said, slow is smooth and smooth is fast. But the experience is completely different. Just adding those few moments of calm, make my whole day feel more grounded. And when I leave the supermarket, instead of feeling like hurried and stressed and a little bit tense, I now feel slightly tired, but mostly relaxed. It is a small change, but it has made my life noticeably better. Number four is doing household chores or having certain household items, just because you are supposed to. This one's kind of funny, because once you start to declutter your stuff, or simplify your life and simplify your routines, you start to think more about why you do the things you do, or why you bought certain things for example. And when you really get down to it, sometimes it just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. And sometimes the only reason that I could come up with was, you know, I just thought that this was something that you were supposed to do, or that you are supposed to own. Ironing is a really good example of this for me. And I'm not saying that no one should iron ever, but for me I really hated ironing. It never came out perfectly, so I was always frustrated. And also I just don't really care about it that much. But I kept my iron and ironing board in our apartment for a really long time, because I just felt like you're supposed to have that, and you're like not a proper adult if you don't. And I only decluttered them when we actually moved into this apartment, because I didn't want them to take up space here. And once I did, like I never regretted decluttering those things. And that is one of my favorite things about simplifying your life. Because it really gives you a space to re-examine and think about your home, tailor your life, your routines to what actually makes sense for you, and not to what you think you are supposed to do. Because who cares? Like as long as it works for you. And another thing that simplifying my life has really taught me, is to be much more intentional about what I let into my days, and into my life. Not just objects, but also information, content, skills, inspiration. And that brings me to today's sponsor, which is Skillshare. Skillshare is a unique platform where basically you can learn whatever you want to learn about. And I've been taking their classes for years. I've learned so many things, from photography and videography for my channel, to writing copy for my website. I took a digital design class for when I make my ebook. But I've also taken classes on plant care, playing the guitar, meditating, even making a better cappuccino. They have creative classes for hobbyists, they have professional classes for leveling up your career. And something that I just always really loved, is that these are real people sharing real creative skills. These people are industry experts. And that is just something that I really appreciate, especially in the age of AI. It is just a very mindful and intentional way to spend your time in the online world. And they have classes for all different levels. For example, when I first started to learn how to make digital art on my iPad, I took Mimi Chow's class called mindful drawing 101, which is learning to doodle some objects in your environment. And then later, I took Maya Fadul's class about creating expressive portraits, where I tried making one of Daenerys. And it was just so much fun. The class that I'm looking forward to taking next is called daily meditative art practice, given by Neha Modi. And this is a combination of making art with pen and paper, but also having this mindfulness to create a calming moment and connect with yourself and your feelings. So that seems super fun to me. I definitely recommend giving Skillshare a try. It is such a fun way to reconnect with your creativity. You can learn at your own pace, you can also get feedback from the teachers, it's just really fun. And you can even try them for free. Because the first 500 people to click my link in the description box, you get a one month free trial. So you can try them out, see how you like it. If you cancel within your trial, then you won't be charged. But I'm pretty sure that you will love it as much as I do. Big thanks to Skillshare for their support, and let's get back to the video. Another thing I quietly stopped doing, was doing the things that online are really trendy, or habits that everyone seems to swear by. Even if I notice that they're actually not really working out for me so well. Things like waking up at 5 a.m. or taking cold showers, or even something like meditating or journaling every morning. And of course there's nothing wrong with any of these habits, and for some people they really do work. But I just really learned that just because something is popular, or I see that it helps someone else, doesn't necessarily mean that it's also going to be helpful for me, for my life, and for my body. I have tried morning smoothies, or working out on an empty stomach, or just doing workouts that were very popular but way too intense for me. Because I feel like these are good things, they are helping people, they should help me as well. And the only thing that they really accomplished was leaving me extremely tired and honestly kind of frustrated. Again, I am a very sensitive person and I've learned that not everything fits with my body, with my energy levels, and that doesn't make me less than. And it took me a while to stop falling into the comparison trap there. But through simplifying my life, I have learned much more about what actually does work for me, and to also feel okay about not doing what everyone else is doing, even if it seems like it is really helpful for them. So I've noticed now that my life is simpler and more intentional, that I have given myself more permission to focus on habits that feel nourishing to me, and not punishing to me. And that is very freeing. Number six is wanting what everyone else wants. Here's a little life hack that I've learned through simplifying my life. Life is so much better, more fun, easier, and cheaper, if you just don't want what everyone else wants. Take vacations. If you go to the touristy places in the peak season, it's going to be more crowded, it's going to be more expensive, and it's going to be less immersive. But if you go to the places that are less popular, or you go in the off season, the whole experience will be so much easier. There won't be so many crowds, you won't have to stand in line. If you go somewhere with a nice view, then you can appreciate that more because there's not like a thousand other people there. And it will be much cheaper too. So the whole experience will just be so much nicer. And it's the same with things like hobbies or interests. A newly released video game can easily cost you between 60 and 80 bucks. Whereas, you know, I usually play video games that have already been out for a few years. They're not any less fun, they're just not as popular right now. And usually they are less than 20, and often they are less than like 10 or 5 dollars. It's like there are two ice cream stands, and in one ice cream stand they are selling matcha ice cream with Dubai chocolate and labubu sticker or something for 20 bucks. And the ice cream stand right next to it is selling something that just happens to not be very popular right now, like cookie dough with chocolate sauce for 2 bucks. And the first stand has a line that will take hours, because everyone wants that because that happens to be popular right now. And the other stand has no line. It's not any less tasty, it's just not popular right now. So I will choose the second ice cream stand any day over the first one. And this goes much further too. If you buy your winter clothes while winter is like almost kind of done, you can basically buy all of that stuff on sale. Or if you buy Christmas decor right after Christmas, then you can get it for so much cheaper. You can even do something like buy yourself an advent calendar right after Christmas, when they're all on sale. And you can have something nice to look forward to every day in January. So you can just open one for yourself every day in January instead. Or schedule some festive like get-togethers with friends and family in January, so that the month of December is a little bit less stressful and you have something fun to look forward to in the like dreary and cold January month. In general, if you want the things that everyone else wants, it's going to be more crowded, more expensive, more annoying. But if you just want the things that are not as popular right now, that is where the good stuff happens. Number seven is retail therapy and shopping as a hobby. Random shopping used to be a hobby for me. And I think that this is a very like normal thing to have as a hobby. And it's funny because I kind of went from someone who did that just with for no reason, just something I enjoyed doing, to then learning a bit more about minimalism and kind of trying to stop myself from doing that. To now being someone who actually doesn't really enjoy it that much anymore, and who tries to avoid it when they can. Especially when it comes to clothing items. I really don't enjoy shopping for clothing that much anymore. And I even sometimes like to go to the stores to kind of like see what is out there. And then I also get reminded of the fact that what is out there is actually not any better than what I already have. And oftentimes it's even, you know, you can already tell it's kind of like poor quality. So I get reminded of it fairly quickly, that there's like not much out there that could actually make my life better. And I kind of already have everything I need, so I just go home without buying anything. And feeling so much more like peaceful and grateful for what I already have. Now don't get me wrong, I still do buy things sometimes that I need or that I love, and then I do enjoy that. But just like random going out shopping, or retail therapy when I was feeling stressed or bored or depressed, that is something just kind of completely went away on its own. It's funny, the irony of having less stuff will also make you want to buy less stuff. Even if you have fewer items, you start to really realize that you already have everything you need, and that you don't want to keep adding more to that. Number eight of the things that I kind of naturally just stopped doing is being too frugal when it comes to comfort. This one might sound surprising, but through simplifying my life I have also learned that sometimes it's okay to spend more. For example, when it comes to comfort. It's strange the kind of things that I used to be frugal about, because I would skimp out on something like comfort. But on the other hand, I would go out shopping really often for clothes that I really didn't need and hardly ever wore. And I felt okay about that because they were mostly cheap. Or when traveling for example, I would cheap out on things like the flight, the hotel or other little conveniences. Because then I would have more money to spend shopping when I was there. But I started realizing that if I skimp out too much, and I have a really broken flight or really lousy lodgings, then I would feel way too exhausted to even enjoy the trip at all. So now I've come to prioritize comfort, and I don't feel guilty about it at all. And I spend more so that I can get a direct flight, a good hotel. I don't need a fancy hotel, but I want something that is comfortable, where I can get a good night's sleep, that is in the city center, so that I don't have to travel far. And I don't feel bad about spending more money on that, because it makes my trip so much more nicer and better and more memorable. If there is a more expensive option for the travel between the airport and your hotel, that actually like saves time or is more comfortable, I will just do it. And because I'm not going to be really shopping while I'm there, or buying a bunch of souvenirs, I do have the money left for things like that. And I feel like simple living isn't just about cutting costs or being as frugal as you can. It is more about value and knowing what you can spend your money on that actually brings you value, versus what doesn't. And for me, comfort is valuable. Number nine is that I stopped working full-time. Another big shift for me has been my approach to work. And for many years I believed that I should be able and should be able to handle a full-time job, because that was what I saw most of my co-workers do. But simplifying my life has taught me something really important, and that is that this isn't the only viable option for everyone. And that if I could find a way to keep my lifestyle costs reasonable, then I could also kind of move my retirement forward in a way, by having one day a week off and working four days a week. So that I actually have that free time already a little bit now. This is what I did when I was still working a corporate job. I went from five days a week to four days a week. I did have to negotiate a little bit about that, but I got there in the end. And my partner followed suit. He still works four days a week. I am now self-employed, so it's kind of different now. Some weeks I work four days a week, other weeks I do work five days a week. It just depends. Some videos just take longer to make. But overall, having that one day a week off changed everything for us. Of course I realized that this is a huge privilege and that not everyone has the flexibility or the opportunity to make this choice. And I am deeply grateful that I can. For me, working an office job five days a week and then having to do everything else on the weekend, was a pace that I was barely able to keep up. And I did feel like I just didn't have a lot of time for myself. And if the option is there, then I personally would always choose making a little bit less money, but having more time. So I am still very happy with our smaller apartment in an older building outside of the city center, with a mortgage that doesn't give me acute anxiety. And not having a car, not buying things we don't need, not wasting money on, you know, a bunch of takeout coffees or multiple subscriptions, and all of that kind of stuff. To keep our living expenses low, so that we have the option to work a little bit less, make a little bit less money, but have more time for the things that actually nourish me. Things like hobbies, social stuff, rest. And that makes me a much much happier person. It means the world to me. And perhaps most importantly, I stopped being so hard on myself all the time. And you know, to be honest, I have some way to go here. But when I compare myself now to before I started my simple living journey, it has changed a lot. Self-criticism and self-compassion are two things that are very opposite, but they are basically trying to achieve the same things. To motivate us through struggles or perceived failures, and to help us be more effective. But we know from research that self-compassion is actually much more successful as a motivator, and more sustainable in the long run. And through simple living, I've really started to be able to see myself a gentler lens. You could imagine it as having like both on your shoulder, and the self-compassionate one is like your own personal cheerleader cheering you on, letting you know that you can do it. And then there's this self-critical little monster on the other shoulder, constantly beating you down. Like, if you look at it like that, it's no wonder that self-compassion is actually more effective in the long run. Before, I used to measure my self-worth mostly by other people's standards, and chasing other people's version of success. And always feeling just never quite good enough. But now, there are still things obviously that I want to work on, or things that I want to improve in, or find important. But it comes from a very different place. One of kindness, and understanding, and support. Instead of one of constant criticism, and not feeling like you're good enough. Deciding to simplify my life, and declutter my stuff, and also get off this constant hamster wheel of mindless consumption, has been one of the best changes and decisions that I've ever made. It has shaped basically all my decisions ever since. And I'm really curious to know from you, what is something that you have kind of stopped doing ever since you started your simple living journey? And how do you feel about that? So let me know in the comments. Don't forget to check out Skillshare, and get your one month free trial. Link in the description. And a little reminder that my new year sale is still up. So you can get my decluttering ebook, my simplify your life course, or my slow living program with 20% off. Links in the description. My new year sale will last until January 31st, so the date is coming quite near. If you are curious about them, then you can sign up now and save yourself 20%. And the discount code that you can use is newyear26. Thank you so much for being here and sticking around until the end of the video. And a special thank you to my channel supporters who are helping me to make this possible. Questions, comments, conversations down below. Have a wonderful, wonderful day. And I will see you all again really soon with a new video. Bye bye. What most people probably don't realize is that filming a 20-25 minute video actually takes me about two hours. And I just noticed that probably for an hour or so I really needed to pee. So I'm gonna do that now.