I WON'T TO BE THE SAME ANYMORE - Powerful Motivational Speech Video

I always tell people that you should try to live your life like a beautiful story, okay? And, you know, every timeless film, every timeless novel that you can remember, they all possess a wide spectrum of events and feelings and scenarios. They make us feel every type of human emotion. That's what we should be after, because it's this wide spectrum of going from comfort to complete vulnerability and feeling lost, and then coming back and finding yourself again. And then this time around, you have new people around you. You have newfound values. You have newfound experience. It's these types of patterns and phases and character development is really what it is that make a story great. If you have a certain level of resilience, if you have a certain level of commitment, you have a certain level of discipline, and you tell yourself, this may get hard, it may get hot, but I'm not turning back around. Eventually what's going to happen is your capacity is going to expand. And then that thing that was uncomfortable becomes just a little bit more comfortable. And then here's what's going to happen. There's a little thing that we call empowerment. You're going to start to empower yourself because now the version of you who started this trek, who started this journey, it's not when you would get to the end, you're not the same person. So you're going to look at yourself a little bit differently. You can feel better about yourself. You're going to say, well, if I made it through that, I can make it through anything. And then here's what comes with that. Peace. But it's a lot harder to get two years down the road and realize that you never hit your goals, that you didn't achieve your dreams. And you know, what's even harder is when you realize that those dreams were not really out of your reach. It was totally possible to achieve them, but you didn't make the right choices day in and day out, decide what your goal is and commit to making the right choices. Even if they're hard, that will get you closer to your goal every single day. We gave meanings to the experiences of our life or other people gave meanings to the experiences that we were having. What you believe will dictate your thoughts on a moment by moment basis. And they're always aligned, right? Your beliefs dictate your thoughts, dictate your emotions, dictate your actions, which produce your results and your results. When you look at them, then just reinforce the original belief. That which we tend to pay attention to is aligned with what we believe. And so that's all we get. So if you want more happiness, if you want more wealth, if you want deeper relationships, if you want to have more joy, you want to have more fun, you want to achieve your full potential and really make an impact in the world. Then what's really important is to get clear on what that could look like for you and to make sure that what you believe is congruent with that outcome. Because if what you believe is not congruent with that outcome, just neurophysiologically, you're working against yourself. Clarity is intimately connected to imagination. So as we're getting clear on something, we're beginning to see what that thing is that we're getting more clarity on. If you're willing to invest time in getting clearer around something or imagining, you build neural networks that represent the memory of an experience that has not happened yet. Step away from that fear and begin to see that there's wonder and beauty and opportunity all around. It begins to activate the part of your brain that's full of imagination and creativity and beauty. We are meaning machines. We not only give meaning to meaningless things, we make meaningful things meaningless. But the moment your mind is under the law of generosity, growth, development, unfolding, giving, compassion, kindness, radiance, the moment that that happens, you come under the right use of the law. The moment you realize you're here to give something, then all thoughts of not enoughness and lack, limitation, fear, doubt, worry, and separation begin to dissolve. And your premise every single day of your life is I am and I've got it all. I am, I've got it all. Your destiny begins to unfold because you're not here to get from the world. You're not here to get, you're here to let. And walk in that even before you can see it. But you've got to find a story that's going to empower you to act. Complexity is the enemy of execution. The more complex you make it, the less likely you're going to execute. If you're creative enough, can you find the answer? Yes or no. If you're determined enough, can you find the breakthrough? Yes or no. If you're passionate, loving enough, can you get someone to help you? Yes or no. If there's no way that you're committed, can you find the money, even if you don't have it? Yes or no. So I said creativity, decisiveness, passion, honesty, sincerity, love. These are the ultimate human resources. And when you engage these resources, you can get any of the resources on earth. Hey man, lately I've been in a funk. I feel like everything is slipping. I feel like I'm not where I should be. Like I'm not who I'm meant to be. I'm seeing all these other people getting ahead and I'm here feeling like I'm running without ever really moving forwards. I'm on this continuous conveyor belt stuck in no man's land, stuck in limbo. And I'm tired. This isn't where I was meant to be or who I was supposed to be. And the deepest feeling that I have is, why? Why am I still here? In all of that frustration and in the friction of that pain, a deep dark part of me speaks and says, is that the best you've got? Have you genuinely given it your all? Did you truly go all chips in? And to be honest, to be really honest with you, a quiet shameful voice is whispering, no, no, I haven't. Our society celebrates conquerors and shame surrender. But what if I told you surrender can actually be a powerful, empowering thing? What if by surrendering, we actually find acceptance? And in that acceptance, we become the conquerors that we're seeking. Now I'm not talking about giving up. Let me be clear. I'm talking about the kind of surrender that is about surrendering to the process, surrendering to the work, the art, the art of being studious. Vedic philosophy talks about this, that when a man sets aside his pride and he abandons his ego, only then can he truly begin with earnestness, the journey of self-development and spiritual growth. In other words, when you reach your lowest point, we become open to the greatest change. I'm not surprised that I am where I am. And you shouldn't be surprised you're getting the results you're getting because what worked for you then, it's not going to work for you now. And amongst the darkness and demons of doubt, what you and I, what we need to realize is that we are social machines built, but also programmed to repeat patterns. And in the early days, these new patterns that we find or adopt, they bring us the excitement of new results. When you do something new, it gives you a new fix, a new result. But over time, these things decay. And it's your job to keep continually defining yourself, to abandon and then enlighten our old selves, the shedding of one shell into the next and the next and the next for lifetimes. The only constant in all of this is that things are impermanent. So don't hold on to what is. Life is like a river and the waters that are still, that you're trying to hold on to, are the same waters that crash and swirl around you. So change, change. And if you want to win, if you want to succeed, if you want to go beyond this, the choice isn't to exit, it's to engage. You need to sit down and have an honest conversation with yourself about the kind of life you want to live, the kind of human being that you want to be, the sacrifice and investment that you are going to have to make in order to get there. And above all else, above all else, what are the things that you are going to personally get fulfillment from? So stay away from social media for a time if you need to. Focus on the goal, focus on the mission, focus on the vision. Don't chase things because you think it might mean that people rate you more. I want you to rate me more. I want you to do it for you and nobody else because that's what real success is. That's a real like, not the kind that you get from your feed, but the kind that you get from the beating of your own heart, your own drum. And remember, it's okay not to know or to have it all figured out. You don't need a grand map of your reality and your future. Your path, it's made by walking it. So take it one step at a time. Take it one moment at a time. Have micro goals. Sometimes in life, you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, but you just got to keep moving forward. And I promise you, you will come to a better place. Self-mastery. Power begins from within. If you're aware of who you are, if you're aware of what you're good at, what you're not good at, if you're able to see how emotions kind of govern your life, if you can learn what your weaknesses are and how to control them, you can't ever get complete control, but awareness is almost enough. Slowly through this process of knowing who you are and understanding other people and how they operate so you don't make stupid mistakes in life, you can increase that little tiny margin more and more and more, and you will be a person of power. We try so hard in our lives to fit in. We try to fit into certain groups, certain frats, certain sororities, you know, among certain friends, yet the people we idolize are most are the ones that stand out. But when you're prepared, there is no fear. There is no fear of failure, because even if you walk out of something and you feel like you failed at it, your preparation is so strong that you're going to take that failure and turn it into the outcome you desire. And most people stop at failure. We've all failed at things. I'm going to continue to fail at stuff. It's the most powerful tool you can use, but it all depends on how you use it. A scalpel in the hands of an individual, it can do unbelievable damage. In the hands of a professional, of a doctor, it saves lives. So it's the same thing with failure. It's how you use it. It's that drive inside of you. It's what we talk about, the dark side. The dark side is filled with failure, but it's the fuel that burns you like something that's never burned inside you before. And on some days, you got to just listen to your soul, and you got to say, I'm a leap. I'm going to get to the edge. Most people are at the edge, and you're standing at the edge, and you're watching everyone else fly. That's pimp my ride, watch my crib, all this stuff. You know, watching people's lives on Facebook. You're at the edge, watching someone else live, wondering what it's going to be like when you jump without ever jumping. And I'm just here to tell you, jump. Because only three things can happen. You're either going to jump and fly, or you're going to jump and fall on something soft, or you're going to fall down hard. Either way, you're going to get back up. You already know you got what it takes to get back up. Your greatest fear is not that you will fall. Your greatest fear is that you will live a full life and never fly, that you never leaped. You're not afraid of dying. You're afraid of dying before the world sees who you really are, before they really get your fingerprint, before they really get your contribution, before they really feel you. That's what you don't want to happen. You don't want to leave this place without us knowing you were here. There's a process. The process begins by first knowing what you really love. And believe me, a lot of people have no self-awareness. They don't even really know what it is that they were meant to do in life. They loved music when they were a kid, but then they got into law or whatever because of their parents, and then they don't know who they are anymore. Well, do I really like music? You got to go through that process first of figuring out what it is that really connects to you in a deep, visceral way, what you loved when you were a kid, what still excites you. Once you go through that and you understand it, you've got some clarity about it. Okay, how do I incorporate that in my life? People that are hungry are willing to do the things a day others won't do in order to have the things tomorrow others won't have. You have to discover what your values are. It's part of the reason why I think that you need to tell the truth, because you're forced to negotiate with yourself to operate properly in the world. If you've warped yourself, let's say, or some elements of yourself by engaging in self-deception and lies, and because of that, you're not who you could be, and you don't live in the world as you should live in it, then when you discuss with yourself what your value should be, it will be as if you're discussing it with someone that you can't trust. You learn more in the middle of a crisis, or when your life has that moment of a downtrodden. There's more wisdom and knowledge, instincts, intuitions, discernment, and instincts that are developed in the middle of a crisis. The truth is that you are going to suffer, but the way to deal with suffering is accepting that suffering, and then recognizing that it is suffering, accepting it, and then letting it sort of have its say, and then moving on from it. All of the power that you have, and all the strength that you have, and all the ideas that you have are in are born in your uniqueness. What makes you unique is what makes you special. You spend your whole life trying to conform, trying to be whatever somebody else thinks you should be, or fit into a mode, or fit into a system, and you dull down your specialness, then you're dulling down all of your ability to change the world. So I think that it's very, very important that people have an opportunity to be the best of themselves that they can be. Actually, we should play like champions and train like underdogs. Why? Because the underdog works in a way, not worrying about what anybody else thinks or believes. That gives you an edge. It gives you a phenomenal advantage. When you're actually worried about what will people say, when you're not concerned by, am I going to fail? Am I going to look worse? See, when we become successful, even as underdogs, if we've risen to success, the biggest enemy of that success is not reconnecting to that feeling of an underdog. So no matter how much success you've achieved, always remind yourself, the mindset of an underdog is the mindset that nurtures talent and nurtures success, that harnesses your true potential. If you value yourself for being a master, if your confidence comes from, I know this stuff, then you're going to be in trouble. Because I think that the reality is that being a master, feeling like you're an expert, that stuff is a trap and you need to keep your beliefs nimble. So the more you learn and the more you need to be checking yourself to make sure that that stuff isn't calcifying into dogma, meaning that it becomes like, I do it this way and that's the way I do it. That's the way I've always done it. That's what my success is based on. So I'm going to keep doing it. That becomes incredibly dangerous, especially now in a world that changes and evolves so quickly. What worked yesterday may not keep working tomorrow. So you've got to constantly be willing to check your assumptions. The things that you're feeling, clenching up, feeling like you're not good enough, feeling like you're not ready, doubting yourself, kind of spending too much time thinking about how much time you've wasted. You cannot overcome those thoughts because they keep rising up and they've become a habit. It's sort of a pattern. You are going to feel like an imposter until you push through that clenched up moment over and over and over again. And then suddenly through action, finally, you're going to see that you're not an imposter at all. You're actually the kind of person that pushes through and does what he or she says they are going to do. When you get tired, when you get fatigued, when you get down, when you're in a slump, it's your habits, rituals, routines, and your standards that carry you through. And if you don't have good habits, you don't have good rituals, you don't have good routines, always in your life, you will fall down in bad times and slumps and fatigue and in stress. You've got to know every no brings you a step closer to a yes. Anybody can stop because someone said no. But there's something in you, in your heart of hearts to say, no, I'm not a quitter. There's something in you that says I've got the will to do it. There's something in you that says I'm going to find a way. You can't straighten yourself out merely as a consequence of hope. Let's say you lay out a vision for the future and you think about what your life would be, what you'd like your life to be like. And then that makes you hopeful and it motivates you because it gives you something worthwhile and higher order to work. Right. And that's useful. That's positive emotion working for you because positive emotion is experienced in relationship because but it's not not as useful as also being chased by something you're terrified by. And if you have a good sense of how you fall apart, if you stayed weak and just exactly what kind of hell that would be, then when you determined to do something like to tell the truth and to say what you think and to not do things that you hate, then you're going to be pulled along by the purpose that your vision has provided for you, but also pushed along by your desire to avoid the worst forms of hell that you've already outlined for yourself. And we want to be them. We want to be someone else. And in doing that, you lose all the potential of who you are. You mimic. You be them. You are them. You become them. And you lose you. And we look up to so many people in this world who will let us down. We're humans. I'm going to let you down. You're going to let somebody down. If you put on a pedestal, you then lose time when that person comes up and lets you down. You must hold yourself accountable and being your hero. That's what that does. You make yourself so totally accountable for who you are. You focus on you and only on you to become the best person you can be for others, because we leave a lot on the table, not searching who we are. And then, therefore, you die not knowing your greatest potential. So you want to be normal. So you just want to be like everybody else that roams the world, not knowing the power that's in them. Being fine with being mediocre. Your dreams are the most powerful thing. Without a dream, there's, again, no point in being here. And we are lost without dreams. So find the time on a daily basis to dream and pursue your dream, whatever that looks like. Be on the pursuit of your dreams. I really believe that you have to seek the love and the beauty that you want in what you have now, because that way you're training yourself to extract meaning right now, which means in the short term, if you can fill that role with meaning and your true passion and what's coming from you, then that's going to lead you to discovering the power of it. Because life is essentially tragic in its fundamental essence, you need a sustaining meaning that's deep and profound, and deep and profound enough to get you through bad times, because there will be very bad times in your life. There'll be death, and there'll be illness, and there'll be disappointment of all sorts. And there'll be just the standard difficulties of life in the world to contend with. And you really must have something that's profound and powerful to set up against that. And I think that your voluntary adoption of the struggle to improve being is the proper antidote to that. You have to understand the fundamental truth of this life. You can always make a different decision, which will lead to a different outcome. Success is not how much money or how much power you have. Success is how well do you do what you do when no one else is looking and keep on doing it. Successful people do all the things that successful people don't want to do. So you've got to be realistically humble. You've got to be ambitious enough in your goals so that you're pursuing something that you regard as truly meaningful and worthwhile. So you want your goals to be of sufficient nobility so that you can live with yourself properly if you're pursuing them, but you want them to be small enough so that you have a reasonable probability of implementing them. Life outside of that one area, most of us worry about suffering. We're afraid of it. When we're suffering and sacrificing, we wonder whether it's worth it. We wonder whether we're supposed to. We wonder whether sacrifice or setbacks or suffering is a sign it's not our real dream, don't we? And your body is a metaphor for the rest of your life, but the rest of our life, every time we sweat, every time we sacrifice, every time we suffer, we don't do what we do at the gym. We start saying, well, wait a minute. Maybe I'm not supposed to be doing this. Maybe I'm not cut out. Maybe it's not my destiny. Maybe I just can't do it. You've got to remember that any challenge we're facing today, we've faced it before as humanity. Changing the stories we tell ourselves, we can either look at challenging situations as opportunities for growth, as an opportunity to learn, as an opportunity to change, be the change. We can look at them and really fall down. Now, that second part is okay. We can even feel like that, right? But we have to recognize it's not permanent. We've got to accept that none of our feelings are permanent. They don't need to be permanent. It's a choice. But recognize that those feelings are not permanent and it'll be amazing when we realize we are seeds, right? That is the most powerful way of finding strength. You get hungry by finding something that's you. I believe that all of us are born unique, but most of us die copies. And so the key to that hunger-driven life is a heart-centered life. I didn't do what I'm doing for years because of my programming, because of the culture in which I was raised. That you have to work on yourself. You have to have an unstoppable attitude and no excuse is acceptable. And you've got to make it a priority, a non-negotiable in your life, and hold a constant vision of what it is you want to achieve. See it accomplished and go all out. Find a way to win. They will always up and down. It's like your energy levels will go up and down and you'll be exhausted. Everything is tied around a story of this is bad, this is wrong, I'm in a bad place, I'm messing up, I'm going broke. That energy will pull you away from service or creation or creativity of how do I get out of this place. Assuming that you have a certain intrinsic value, it's necessary for that value to manifest itself for you to push yourself against the world, to challenge yourself. Otherwise what you're capable of won't manifest itself. It has to be developed. It has to be called forth by necessity, right? You have to pick a hard problem and try to solve it and push yourself against it. And you have to try to do that truthfully and responsibly in order for what it is that you're intrinsically capable of and composed of to come to the forefront. Encourage people to be responsible for themselves and for other people and also to point out that you have a moral responsibility to do so for yourself just as you do for others. There's a gap between the world and the things that trigger you and your response and your entire life is that gap. And when you start to understand that your whole life plays out in this five second gap and that there's a gap that's five seconds long between fear and courage and there's a gap that's five seconds long between self-doubt and confidence, that is your life. And what's super cool about understanding that your whole life is inside this gap is it's so small, everybody, that you have the ability to control it. Life's always gonna throw triggers at you and there will always be all kinds of cool things that inspire you, your wisdom, and you get to choose what happens in that gap. Do you succumb to an excuse or do you push yourself forward? And so that gap is everywhere and it's the same everywhere and when you start to go to work in controlling how you live in that gap between stimulus or idea and your response, that's where the magic is. What makes people different is a flip in their ******* mindset. All those things that happen to you in your life, all those bad things, all those things that you blame other people for, they're now yours to own. You gotta figure out a way to reprogram your mind to get outside the box. A lot of people will listen to this and they'll be motivated, they'll be fired up, they'll be so fired up it's not even funny. Motivation is just kindling. It starts to fire, but that kindling, once one raindrop hits that little kindling, it'll burn out. But it has to be something that's deep down inside. So motivations like this, if you're married and your wife is okay and your bills are paid and the kids are good and your dog's good, if everything is good, you can find some motivation because while your life is happy, it's that ************ that wakes up in the sewer every ******* day, has nothing to ******* go home to, has nothing. Bills aren't paid, doesn't know when ******* next meal's coming, doesn't know ---- and still says **** it. I am going to do what I have to do to get to where the **** I have to go. That's the motivation and drive and is soon obsession. Obsession makes a person, makes other people, like so when you're around somebody that's obsessed, most people don't have any ******* idea what they're calling you. So they call you crazy. They call you crazy because they don't understand where you're trying to go, what the **** you're trying to do, what you're trying to be. So to the normal person, which we're all normal, we're all very normal. Once they turn that mindset to a point where they no longer want to be so-called normal, that's when you start to find out that motivation is not enough. It's not enough. You have to be that person who no matter what's going on, if you're a big time runner, you don't care what temperature it's like, all pleasure people are around with. That's what they do every morning, every night and look to see what the ******* temperature is going to be tomorrow. What's the temperature going to be so am I going to run inside or am I going to run outside? A person that's obsessed and wants to just get there, they don't give a **** what the temperature is. They no longer care because they know no matter what's out there, it might be snowing, if it's a damn tropical storm, if it's 220 below, they're going to run. They don't care. So there's no need to waste the time to look. I'm just going to go and that's how you want to get your mind. It doesn't matter what the ****'s out there, what's in front of me because a motivated person is going to look because that weather is going to ******* change their motivation. Up or down, oh it's 70 and sunny, I'm motivated. Oh it's 30 and a blizzard, **** that, I'm going to go inside. An obsessed person doesn't care. They get the ******* job done. I was in hell. I wasn't able to be in hell and be calm. Hell makes you anxious. Hell makes you want to get out of it. It's that person who has the ability to be in hell and think very calmly, very rationally about what the hell is going on. What's the truth? What's the reality? Why is my dad this way? Why are these kids calling me black? Why, why, why? You have to be able to piece people apart. Take it down, dissect it, and see what's going on. So back then I had no skills. I had no skills. All I saw was a whole bunch of kids like me, but I no longer saw that. All I saw was the spray painting on my car, me being called black. That's all I saw. My lens was this big. It was very small, very small ******* lens. When now my lens is very, it's huge. I see everybody for who they are and what they are. So that's, that's the one thing that changed in me was my reality. We always paint a fucked up reality. It's not even true. It's reality what we think is true because our lives aren't what we want it to be. I realized that God wasn't going to give me a get out of jail free card and from the time I was born into the time I was 19 years old, my life had these hurdles. I constantly hit obstacles, obstacle after obstacle after obstacle, and I had to figure out how to manage suffering, how to deal with it because it'd be part of my life forever. At least that's what I thought. So in order to deal with it, I had to be able to conquer it and overcome it and deal with it and know that in this suffering, there has to be some kind of growth with every obstacle I look at as friction. Now, without friction, there is no growth. You have to have friction in your life to grow. So I started looking at all these different things versus the what was me mentality that, Oh my God, look at my life. My life's so fucked up. I come from this fucked up family. I'm being beaten. I'm being abused mentally, physically. I started looking at it as the perfect trial ground. So I had to flip it upside down and say, Okay, I'm suffering tremendously mentally. Use this to your advantage versus your disadvantage. So that's what I did versus looking at it as like, Oh my God, what was me? I'm never gonna get out of here. I looked at it as, Okay, hang on a second. Hang on a second. If I can overcome this, if I can find some power in this, some way to get through this, that right there will be the fuel for the rest of my life. And so I found great strength in suffering, great strength in it, because while I threw all of that, it started to callous my mind over the victim's mentality. You have to recognize what you've gone through. And that right there gave me pride. I realized that very few people could turn upside down what I did. I was able to turn upside down every negative thing in my life, everything and use it for power. Because on the other end of suffering is greatness. It's not over here. So a whole bunch of us, we put ourselves in this great box. And in that box, there's no suffering in it. So what we do is we shelter ourselves from greatness. So for me, for instance, I was 300 pounds. At one time in my life, spray for cockroaches made $1,000 a month. I was living in that box. I was sometimes I'll go over the box and I saw hell, suffering, storms, avalanches, tornadoes. I don't want to go over there. But I knew if I can get through that ---- mentally, on the other side was 185 pound person who Navy SEAL went through Ranger School, only person to do this only person do that only person do this. But that's through all of that ----. All that ---- I had to go through. So you peek over the box, and you go back in and say, Oh, I'm okay being 300 pounds making $1,000 a month. I'm okay over here. Because that hurdle is suffering, suffering. And when you're willing to go past suffering and see that suffering is one of the best ways you can grow that you can overcome, because you can suffer for the long term, you can suffer slowly, or you can go through pain, and then experience what's on the other side. You know, the other side is where you start to really start your journey. People think they start their journey because they're born. Wow, there's a lot of people in graves who have lived 100 years and never started their real journey. Your real journey starts when you go outside that box. And you start climbing mountains, you start climbing mountains, you think you're at the top of the mountain, you go down the other side, you think I'm here, you look up ****, there's another ******* mountain. And it goes on. And it goes on. And it goes on. And just when you get ready to quit. You crest that final mountain, you get down and look. And it starts to make sense to you that doesn't make sense to you. It's you get outside that ******* box. I've talked to so many ******* people. And what I say is not for everybody. So many people don't have any clue on what the **** I'm saying because they're in this box. And it's their brain. The mind is a very powerful thing. It has a tactical advantage over you all the time. It knows your fears. It knows your insecurities. It knows where you don't want to go. So it will guide you away from that. And that's why the mind will always win it till you reprogram it. It will always win until you ******* reprogram it.