She lost it all, but it was just the beginning | Unbreakable with Julie Condliffe

Where am I supposed to go now that I've lost everything? I am going to evolve into a better version of myself and then I'm going to make a difference for the next person. I'm going to teach you about the most fascinating ways in order to live a farther life. Every single Thursday you just need to subscribe by hitting the subscribe button. I'll see you every Thursday to re-spark your life. Yes, this is Raymond Aaron but you know me for gosh sakes. You know that I sometimes bring you my world-famous friends but what I love bringing you is stealth wisdom that you'd never find out about on your own. And who is it this time? It's Julie Condliffe, a former lawyer and she's going to reveal the power of embracing transformation and creativity to inspire you to elevate your career. You thought I was going to say elevate your life, didn't you? Elevate your career. Career innovation and resilience are essential now as you, like many, seek purposeful paths amid vast societal and job market changes. And she's the master who's going to bring it to you. So Julie, are you here? Yes, no pressure at all there, Raymond, after that great introduction. Thank you for having me. My intro, yes. You have to live up to it but I suspect you will. You're a lawyer, you know how to dance with words. But even more deeply, you've left the law in order to do what? Like, what do you mean uplift my career? What does that mean? Yeah, sure. A really good question. Thank you so much. So I left the law not because I wanted to, I left the law because I had to. Being a lawyer, Raymond, is something that I've always wanted to do since I was little. So I was brought up in a family where we were encouraged to believe in our dreams no matter what. So we didn't have any money at the time because my father had died when I was 10 months old and my mother had eight children to raise on her own. So there was absolutely no way mum would be able to have enough money to take me to university when we were running to school with no shoes because we didn't have any money for shoes. But what my mother gave us was hope, regardless of what we didn't have materialistically. She gave us something that's more powerful than, you know, the tangible things that we've got is the gift of hope. So I hoped that I would become a solicitor one day because of all the atrocities that my family had faced. My family had been kicked out of their family home after my father died. That was because people accused my mum of having killed my father and yet my father was shot dead by a gun during the War of Liberation. So that was a painful experience. But later on in life, when we had this property through a deal that my mum had entered into, she was a housemaid and the woman that she worked for had said she could work for five years without getting any salary and then will be entitled to this ramshackle thing that we called a property. Five years went by, we celebrated, super happy. But when this lady died, her children refused to honour the agreement because we didn't have it in writing, Raymond. It was impracticable for us to enforce that. So I experienced that and I thought, I need to be a lawyer. I have got to be a lawyer. There has to be a way of getting justice in this world. So that's when I started my journey to becoming a lawyer. I left Zimbabwe at a young age, just by myself, coming to Great Britain because I couldn't afford to go to the local university and we only had one university. So my grades wouldn't actually qualify me to go to that one university because it was very, very competitive. But what my family did is they borrowed money. So they had £500 to enable me to catch the flight and to come to Great Britain with just £500 in my pocket and a suitcase full of hope. I knew absolutely nobody. But to fast track, I struggled a lot. I became homeless, sleeping in the payphone booths and all the rest of it just to become a solicitor. That was my dream and I would do anything to pursue it. And I did that. I became a solicitor. Fast forward, of course, a lot happened in between. And you're welcome to ask me any questions. I'll be more than happy to answer those. I became a solicitor, became super successful. And then I went to social media, Raymond. I thought to myself, I need to help other people like me, other people who are coming from Africa, from those poor places with dreams as well. I want to give them hope and I want to show them that if I can do it, they can do it too. So I set up a group on Facebook and I had about 6,000 people round about on my group. I would inspire them every morning. I'll tell them my story about my journey and then I'll tell them how I started in property investment as well and how that worked for me because now I was a property solicitor and I was also doing property investment, Raymond. So loads of people succeeded and a lot of people bought houses just like I had done. And that would give me so much joy because that's what I wanted, giving hope, paying back, you know, that's what I wanted to do. But that all sounds very good. How did you get kicked out of the lot? Yeah, things went wrong, Raymond, because with property investment, not every deal goes according to plan. Things change, markets fluctuate and some deals just don't go as they ought to. And that's just the nature of the beast. So I had about five or six people out of that 6,000 who were not very happy with the way the deals had gone. And they were saying, Julie, you've taken our money. This deal hasn't gone. This training programme hasn't really worked. You are a scammer. We're going to expose you. We're going to bring you down. And then they started this whole social media cancellation campaign against me. When it started, Raymond, I couldn't actually believe it because I just thought, what are you talking about? You can go and tell anybody your story because at the end of the day, things went wrong. But we've got processes, don't we? You can go to the property ombudsman because I'm registered with the property ombudsman and all the rest of it. They're like, no, we're going to bring you down. And they were saying loads of horrific things. So they went to my regulatory body, reported me, and they didn't just do it all in one go. So they would stagger them because it was all planned. So one person would go and then after that, the next person would go and then after that, the next person. So it was a whole six of them who went there. And then my regulatory body started the investigations. It took over five years. So five years, I was going through all this pain, all these investigations, all these nasty things being said about me on social media. So it came January this year. My regulatory body just basically said, that's it. End of the journey. End of story. So that's when I lost my practicing certificate. My gosh. Now, this is supposed to, no, sorry, it sounds like a sad story, but yet you're happy. So what's gone on? One door closes, another door opens. Tell us the end of the story. Yeah, you're right. One door closes and another door opens, Raymond. But there's that messy middle, isn't there, when one door closes. And it's a painful thing because if it had always been your dream and you lose something that's so dear to you, for me, that was my career. That was my profession. I lost that. So I think I should make it clear to everybody that that was a dark, dark time in my life when I lost it. Because when you lose something dear to you, be it a career, be it a marriage, be it a relationship, be it whatever, there is a time that you go through, you know, the whole grieving process, the time where you don't know what tomorrow is going to bring, a time where you feel very sorry for yourself. And I think rightly so. But there was a day where I just heard something say to me, arise. And I was thinking, what? Arise? What do you mean? Arise go where? Do what? Nobody wants to hear from me. Nobody wants to know about me. And quite frankly, I've got nothing to arise for because I was just in bed all the time. I think I was probably depressed. But anyway, arise then became a formula that I used to get me out of that dark place. So arise to me, Raymond, was just really an acronym which stands for the following letters. The A is acceptance. So I had to accept where I was. I just had to accept that I'm no longer a solicitor. I had to accept that all these nasty things had actually really happened to me. So I had to get to a point of acceptance. That was the starting point from where I was to where I am now. Acceptance was the first thing. And then I stopped feeling sorry for myself because I had to. And I had to reframe how I looked at this situation. Rather than saying, they did this to me. They did this to me. They're so cruel. And why did this happen to me? I had to start seeing the obstacle as the way. And I had to use the art as like redirection. So it's a roadblock, but it's not necessarily a roadblock if I don't choose to see it that way. I could see it as a redirection. So where is this redirecting me to? Raymond, where am I supposed to go now that I've lost everything? So then I would think, okay, the answer then comes from. Does it come from outside? Is somebody going to tell me what I need to do? But then I had to find the answers from within, which was then my internal guide, my internal compass, Raymond. And then after that, once I sat down with myself. And became quiet enough to be able to hear. Because sometimes when there's a lot of noise going on outside, it's very, very difficult. And even a lot of noise going on in our own minds at the time. So that was a gift. Being able to listen to that inner voice. And then after that, the S represents your sacred vision. Being able to change your perception and being able to change your perspective. So perception and perspective together become your sacred vision. It will help you visualize and see exactly where you need to go. And as part of that, you said you've gone through all of this, Julie, but you're still happy. It's because of the E in Arise, which is learning to enjoy the journey. I don't count myself to have apprehended at all. I'm not where I would love to be. But I've just come to this place where I am where I am. And it is what it is. And I am going to enjoy the journey each and every single day. So I hope I managed to answer your question, Raymond. Yes, Arise, what a beautiful acronym you've created. You know, I never realized it. One door closes, another door opens. It sounds so slick and easy. But there is horrible grief and self-blame and all that crap that goes on. Yeah. So thank you for reminding me that it ain't as easy as doors opening and closing. OK, so now that we have the E, we have the enjoyment. What is it? What's your new life? How did you recreate yourself? Sure. So the first step in recreating myself was understanding that all these narratives that are out there, everybody's got their own story about Julie, their story about who Julie is, their story about what Julie did, their story about whatever it is. But I have got power. I have got the power to write my own story. That's why then I took my pen, literally, and a paper, and I wrote my book, which is called Unbreakable. I've got a copy here. So I started writing my book called Unbreakable. And in Unbreakable, I tell my story because it's my story, a whole story. And I wrote a whole book about it. And the thing about writing this book, Raymond, was it wasn't just telling a story, it was healing, because in writing it, I just found so much healing, so much peace and loads of other different things. And people who read the book, they write to me and they say, Julie, wow, this is just what I needed. Because when people realise that we are all going through something, because you're either going through something, you're just coming out of something, or you're about to get into something, being a challenge or whatever, that's life, isn't it, Raymond? That is the circle of life. So I share all the painful stories in my book, but not as like a trauma dump. It's just hope. I've gone through this, and here is where I am. I've gone through this, and this is what you can also do. So it's all about hope. That's the long and short of it, Raymond. So that's what I'm really happy about. Wow. I'm very impressed. But tell me, what's your current life? What do you do now? Oh, what do I do now? OK, so I speak now. I share my story on global stages here in Great Britain. I've been to loads of other different countries where I share that story unbreakable. I share the formula that I've given you, Arise, to help other people. And I also run a training programme called Arise to help other professionals, other people who are going through, you know, transition, going through a dark time, helping them reclaim their voice, find their feet and get to where they're destined to be. That's what I'm currently doing. And I love that. I've heard that when you're going through the valley of death, keep going. I love that. And it's just so true, isn't it? Some people get stuck. They keep telling the same story over and over again. She did this to me. The truck driver did it. The cheating husband, the bitchy wife. They just regurgitate the same story to their same friends for decades. Or even good news, like someone had their heyday as the quarterback of their high school football team, and they tell that story of throwing the winning catch, the winning pass. Thank God. Last second of the game and everybody's heard the story a hundred times. Yeah. So you have to keep going. You can't get stuck even on a good thing. That is so true. That is so true, because then it becomes like a broken record, doesn't it? And it is just what it is. But I think it's just the power, Raymond, of either revolving or evolving. And I think that's the choice that we've got. So we can revolve around the same story, regurgitate all those facts. Or we could take a step and think, you know what, rather than revolving, I am going to evolve into a better version of myself. And then I'm going to make a difference for the next person. I know that you do. I'm going to tell you something that very few people know about me. Oh. That is, I think as great a job as I do, I've been a professional speaker for 42 years. I've helped millions of people. I've written 147 books. I've really done a great job. Literally 147? 147, yes. Raymond, that's impressive. I didn't know that. Yes, but I do confess I am an overachiever. Well, 147, that speaks volumes, doesn't it? But here's what I want to tell you. Yeah? You know, I love what I do. I like wildly love it. Very successful and helped a lot of people. I really think I should have been a lawyer. Really? But the reason is, every one or two years, somebody will come up to me and say, you a lawyer? Like, out of the blue. Really? People I don't know. People stop me on the sidewalk. Wow. People that I meet at a networking function. They'll say, let me guess, you a lawyer? But they never guess that I'm a plumber, neurosurgeon. They never guess anything except, you a lawyer? They don't even say, you a lawyer or what? Like, they don't even allow any room. It's just lawyer. And I don't know why. I was going to ask you why. Why do you think that is? I mean, obviously, you are very articulate and you're very intelligent. But you must know why. Well, I can kind of nibble around the edges. In university, I graduated top of my class as a physicist. Wow. I've been rated as a genius in mathematics. I've been admitted to Mensa, which is the top 2% of IQ in the entire world's population. But physics, who the hell wants physics? Nobody. I never made any money in physics. That's impressive. I could have applied that same wisdom in law and been very successful. But I don't want anyone to think I'm regretful or something. I wildly love my life. Wow. But I've always wondered why I keep getting attracted to the law. That's amazing. I just think you've achieved so very much. I think that's absolutely incredible. You are blessed. But what I also think, Raymond, is this. You are super smart. There's nothing that can stop you from doing law. Even today, there's nothing at all. You can do law if you wanted. I don't know if they allow 80-year-olds into law school any longer. I think they do. You look great, by the way. Well, they will do because you can do it like distance learning. Because that's how I did it. I did a distance learning myself. Yeah. So you can do that. I think you should do it. Wow. Well, thanks for the encouragement. My daughter just got her MBA by distance learning. And it's a two-year course. Everyone knows MBA is two years. She completed it in four months. No way. She's definitely your child, isn't she? That's what I was hoping you'd say. Well, I said it. You are wonderful. I'm really enjoying this. Oh, wow. Do you know what? So am I. Because it's just a real conversation. And it's just a genuine discussion. But it would really make my day, Raymond, if you did that law thing. It really would. And if your daughter did her MBA in four months, you can do your law in six months, could you? Or even less. Oh, good Lord. So tell me, what would you like to give us? Give us a gift. Give us something. Yeah, sure. I would love to give you a download of a document that I call Unbreakable Reset. It just helps you reset after you've gone through a very, very challenging time. So it's almost like it's the precursor to the Arise, where we talk about acceptance and all the rest of it. So reset is just to help you regroup. So you've got meditation, you've got loads of different things. So if you go to my website, which is juliecondliffe.co.uk, you'll be able to download the Unbreakable Reset. And I think it would just help people find themselves again, Raymond, because like you and I discussed, yes, one door closes, the other one opens. But just during that period in between, before you find your way to the new door, if you can just find a time to find yourself to rest, reset and then reignite, that will help you do that. Let me help my dear listeners who just said, what's the website again? It's juliecondliffe.co.uk. And when you go there, you can get the download that you just offered. But I am going to add that you should also go to Amazon, pay the 20 bucks, whatever it is, and get her book Unbreakable. Wow, because she was unbreakable. And in her book, she teaches you to be unbreakable. And I have gone through horrors in my life that turned out to be wonderful, the best thing that could have ever happened to me. But while I was going through them, they didn't look like the best thing that could have ever happened to me. They look like the worst thing. They look like a thing that could have killed me. And yeah, Unbreakable, the book at Amazon. And go to her website, juliecondliffe, I told you how to spell it, .co.uk and get her free download. Julie, you are wonderful. You are gorgeous. You are a light. You use it as a lawyer and also as a seminar leader and as a speaker to uplift others. What a wonderful calling. Wow, that means a lot. Yeah, no, that means a lot coming from you, Raymond. It genuinely does. And I thank God for you for giving us this platform to share our stories and to meet honorable people like you. This truly has been a blessing. So thank you. Thank you, Raymond. One of my favorite quotations that you remind me of very well is a job is what you're paid for, but a calling is what you're made for. Yes. And you were paid, you were made to be a solicitor and then you were made to lose it and to recreate yourself so that you could help even more people. Wow, that's so powerful. But I'm not going to cry because I've got makeup on. So there you have it. Thank you. Thank you so much. This is good. Thank you. Wow, I sure hope you enjoyed that fascinating episode. Please make sure you subscribe and please tell your friends if you like it, that they will probably like it as well. For your information, this experience, this service, this podcast has been sponsored by the Orbit Coaching Program. All of my friends, all my world famous speaker friends all have coaching programs. Mine has been independently rated as the number one high level coaching program. You cannot purchase it. You have to audition for it by me personally. If you're interested, please email me at respark at Aaron.com. Respark at A-A-R-O-N. Say that you're interested in being considered for the Orbit Coaching Program and include your cell phone numbers that I personally will call you back.