They told him he would never mentally develop past age 10 | From Brain Deficient To PhD with Albert Bramante

What is some evidence of that feeling okay you say you feel like a broad have other people told you that well now okay well very often when we get constructive criticism we exaggerate we have a tendency of delete distort and generalize. Hello this is raymond aaron new york times top ten bestselling author bringing you respark your life podcast the world's premier podcast to ignite the fire to allow you to live life on your own terms, Yes it's raymond aaron and you know the culture of respark your life i sometimes bring you my world famous friends that you like hearing from but mostly i bring you stealth wisdom from people you'd never. Find out about that's my genius and who am i bringing you today another person who's one when i tell you his name is a who's that. Twenty minutes from now you'll be in love with them and you'll be much illuminated and and why send and here is albert bramante. Hi i'm glad you're here to hear my intro. Okay hey he helps performers educators and creators unlock their potential by blending psychology. Performance strategies and artificial intelligence to fuel on stoppable moment. Wow twenty years at the crossroads of entertainment and higher education he is coached actors. To land life changing roles mentored students to become high performing professionals and develop systems that help people break through fear imposter syndrome and self sabotage as the ceo of bramante artists he represents a diverse. Talent roster working across broadway film television commercials and print. He doesn't just book rolls he builds careers using psychology. Insights and industry strategy. He helps talent that you develop long term purpose driven success wow wow. So are you gonna be able to live up to all of that. I hope another introduction wow okay so let's get started. Let's get started with the how you got into this so did something happen to you when you were a kid. Did some parent say that you'll never amount to anything that some teachers say that. Never succeed or did and then you struggled against that and succeeded or what was the genesis of a combination of a lot of things so. When i was born i was born premature baby so. I had a lot of i think the first few years of my life a lot of health problems and more chronic pneumonia. I was in intensive physical and occupational therapy that trouble walking i had trouble. Communicating and the doctors kind of told my parents not to have much hope for me this is that. Late seventies early eighties not have much hope for me and that if i was lucky i would pass the mentality of a ten year old. So thankfully i had parents who didn't give up on me they they didn't listen to the doctors and i thank them for that i also had a couple teachers that you know in kindergarten as well as when i was in seventh grade. I should be in a self-contained class because at this time we were in junior high which is a translator classes so she told my parents that i should. Belong in a special individual class for because i was lower of the lowest. She is so that was kind of like the driving force for not only just for her but even for me or it's like i've got to be the high achiever. And it really wasn't until high school where i woke up so to speak because i was always like a bc student i wasn't a fail i didn't fail in the classes but i'd never was really the high achiever up until my junior in high school. Where i just woke up and i went from pretty much overnight for my b's and c's straight a's wow and it was really amazing achievement and then. My senior year in high school i was in honors classes pretty much the honors track and straight a's and. I was in college prep classes and i remember. At the which really felt good i sent a copy my transcripts of my senior year and with the highlight of the honors class and straight a's and sent it to my seventh grade teacher and to my doctor doctors at the time and thank them for their support. Exactly but i also. You know i am in the sense it was sarcastic and sarcastic because their motivation can help me to. Yes really prove them wrong. Wow that's a tough story man yeah so i think ever since then i was like i'm just gonna. I am the first person in my family in my immediate family to go to college i don't need to go to college but i have a doctorate. It's amazing but yes i was motivated by you know personal experiences. Make sure living coaching people on getting rid of negative beliefs and she coaches lots of people in c-suites like CEO CFO in fortune. Five hundred fortune one hundred fortune ten companies and no matter how much the c-suite executives earn like. Five million dollars a month no matter how much they earn on salary they always confide in her if only the board of directors knew. That the stock went up because of what the previous CEO did or the product would have sold on its own it wasn't my idea like they always have some excuse. Well and it's true and it's a very often very multi-layered so the one thing i will say i think is a misconception of imposter syndrome high achievers often have imposter syndrome peak performers often have. Imposter syndrome and sometimes can be driving force so the first thing i would say is it's a normal process i think it's not. I don't really like the fact that steam and i sometimes it's a problem it is it can only back but it's also. No i don't like my whole thing is i don't want to be stigmatized it's a actual process we go through so i can reframe the look you're growing you're changing your growing your and this is normal part of things to feel this way. So i have my own you know how many imposter syndrome a lot of times to where. I was basically hearing these messages of at times. Of you know maybe this isn't for you or and they were self imposed so. What i do for what help me is looking at my previous achievements so one thing i would use that we work with someone to go what what's talk about your past what have you done you know and. Well i graduated high school that's a great thing i graduated from college i went to trade school that's great and so you. Work on the previous achievements and then look how far you've come now if you were necessarily that way you know that you know fraud or what do you know or you know not that. Deserving of it look at what you come look how far you come and that's the first thing that i would really say is like take a look at that and. Take actions because small actions can actually help you get to your goal so. And then i would also kind of ask what is some evidence of that of that feeling okay you say you feel like abroad have other people told you that will now. Wow. So by deleting we take out the good things that we've done which is what really impossible about we're deleting the previous achievements that we had we distort so we made. Distort things by starting you know someone said that the critical remark. And you know we will do well that doesn't mean they don't like me that doesn't mean that that means i work is inadequate. What did they say that most of them so well now i'm like well why are you internalizing like that so that's that's part of it that's part of that too. The and then generalization we generalize well i can't do anything right and then usually i'll sit there and analyze that you mean everything anything. Wow well maybe you can help me i have been successful on stage. Every minute for forty two years i'm one of the highest income earners on stage now by zoom and i teach great principles great workshops. My test i have a mountain of testimony i earn well but most important. My clients love me i have a hundred thousand clients love but albert when i get an a letter like a handwritten letter in the mail. Through my office i say oh no it's a lawsuit oh no they hate me oh no they're gonna demand their money back what have i done wrong. I have evolved enough to laugh at it to say oh for gosh sakes raymond you've said that a million times before and it's always a glowing testimony and that comes me down a lot. But i still say well let's just check inside the envelope to see and so it's not all consuming it's not gigantic it's me but damn it albert. It's still a little bit there when i get a handful of i don't say oh you be another testimonial. Yeah well i would just say like a rather than saying okay just go with the mind so let's see what this is let's see what's in the envelope first and then worry about it. Could be a testimony could be an advertisement it could be a spam mail a message you know you don't know that right. And and so i would just go back look look this is what will be what it is i got i got five letters in the mail let's see what the five are and then worry later. Right that's good worry later. Yeah right okay good that's very good now i want you to tell me your most. Interesting coaching client experience coaching experience of the client i would say. Just watching people breakthroughs is really important so. I was working because i work i represent actors as an agent so even i wasn't this person wasn't really a paying coaching client of mine i was also unofficially coaching do that a lot with the with my acting clients and unofficial capacity so. There was this one that a client who i have one for lady very nice for very and in her life when you speak to her she has a gravitas towards her that's strong and powerful. Yes my car is the other article but she's strong and powerful in her acting and performing work she was very meek and soft spoken. So and almost like playing very small like hiding in a corner even when she's performing and. What can you personal power when you speak when you're not on camera you're not performing you're powerful because she was actually a. She work for a you know major company she was like in a in a high rank in the purchasing department in addition to being active active but she was a very powerful. You know add a very powerful persona to her when she was not so. Let's take that to the rules your plane let's take transform that persona to the world you're playing and. Add this time she really tell me but when when this was happening in the beginning of the she was contemplating giving up corporate job. Make great money but was just not making what acting didn't look anything for nine or ten years and by all metrics you might even consider that might be understandable walk away. They have a great job they're successful in their job but it's not the acting was working out. So let's just try this i said what the worst that can happen is two years from now we're gonna be the same position. Get a great job i said so let's just try something different and through time to coaxing. Working in conjunction with her acting coach let's try out this system persona so few months after doing this. She went on your first major tv audition for the netflix series orange is the new black and she wound up getting the role. Wow a month later she got an audition for cbs show fbi. A small role landed that role wow a year later on rsv landed that role so it was an amazing process and. When i think it's okay she said it's emotional like reflecting on it like how powerful just a little shift can be. Add one of the premises my book is that they all are almost enemy is staring. I was out of the mirror a lot of times it's not other people it's ourselves haha wow i love your question. Do other people actually notice that you have the imposter syndrome inside. I can other people actually said that you're worthless or that you don't deserve it and when they say no it's hard to keep the imposter syndrome when no one notices that yeah that is funny. It's like i can't do anything right you mean anything did you get dressed today did you get well. Or you know it even even in the relating to like you know they go on five interviews nobody likes me. Nobody nobody loves you that's wonderful and because we have a generally tendency to generalize this you know goes back to deletion distortion generalization we delete. You know important information we distort and we generalize one or two experiences to make it the whole thing. Yes yes i love your example of changing a small thing with your client who wanted. To be an act and suddenly everything change that's so wonderful wonderful and because you told that story. I've noticed something about myself that i never noticed before so i'm thanking you for this just for fun i auditioned. To be in a play it's a little old amateur theater company that's actually been around for like forty years and it was sense and sensibility by jane austin. How could play yes okay and i got the smallest part it was thomas the butler. So i come in and out in and out and in and out but i'm always in the background. I'm i'm the butler i have to be silent i say very few things i sometimes bring in something or take something out or deliver cookies or something but. Albert i loved it and i became thomas the butler i just became it and backstage when us actors were talking to each other. We would use our human name except for me they would call me thomas because i so wiggled into inside the part. That i stood taller i wore a tuxedo on stage oh man i just loved it and what i noticed. When you told the story about the woman actress is that i never. Have the tiniest imposter syndrome for acting even though i'm not a professional i've never earned a penny added but i never worry that when the show is over there's gonna be several people in the audience that said boy what a lousy butler that was. Never never in a car and that's when you would adapt that mindset even if any professional actors are listening to this will you take this to states and put it aside. And just look at this is performing in the same thing goes with auditioning. What one of the advice i tell a lot of that actors is to just pretend that you perform for two minutes all it is don't worry about the outcome don't be attached the outcome you're going in for two minutes. It's your time to showcase your ability and you're there to work and play really think about it. So if you use that mentality rather than worrying about what is gonna be the outcome worrying about am i gonna get the part know you're going in for two minutes in your acting you decide become a professional actor because you like performing. Well here's your chance to perform for two minutes and do what you love and get in get out let it go. And you know what if it if it turns out something great if not you're able to perform for two minutes right which you love doing anyways exactly so it's a win win now. My subscribers are on the edge of their seat right now or maybe they're walking their dog whatever but i think they are intrigued by you and i think that they want to buy your book. And i think they may want you to coach them. And so i'm gonna give them a link right now that they can go to and they can scour around what they find there and they can. Find the link to buy your book tell everybody that title of your book. Whether we're sitting sales we're always kind of performing yes i'm not that so there's a lot of information can be applicable to every anybody everybody. I missed the title you said it too fast just the title subtitle. I rise above the script rise above the script who i love that rise above the script what a delicious title. Rise above the script oh man that is so illuminating and empowering so if you're interested in rise above the script of course you can just go to amazon but there is a website that you can go to a linkedin site. That's alberts linkedin site and you can get lots more information there and you can ask to be his. Coaching client if you wish or you can ask him to be your your talent agent and the message linkedin dot com. Slash i am slash albert bramante. A l b e r t course bramante b r a m a n t e so it's linkedin dot com slash i am slash albert bramante. His book is rise above the script a delicious title or you can just go to amazon if you wish. In order to get more about him because you spent twenty minutes with him. And with me and i think you like him cuz i really like him albert if we were neighbors we need your friends we be out in the backyard barbecuing right now or absolutely. Right on well albert i'm really glad that your mommy was so powerful. That she ignored messages from distinguished people like medical doctors who had evidence they had evidence that you know absolutely. And you know we didn't know much about neuroplasticity is as we do now so i might have been showing all of those signs that i might we're gonna have problems. I'm not saying that they were completely wrong they might have made judgements too fast i might have been showing the signs but i worked hard to overcome them. Yes and my guess is that those doctors are right ninety nine times out of a hundred. And you are the exception because of your powerful mom and because of your own powerful mind and will to so bravo congratulations i honor you for it. And i am so glad that you created a career that helps a lot of people and i'm glad you're on my show. I'm glad you and i appreciate you inviting me and ask you invited me to be on i don't want you to leave yet i gotta ask another question absolutely this question you have no ability to answer but i use it on some of my more interesting. Interviewees and you are definitely in the category of mucho interesting the question is. Would you rather be a birthday cake or a fortune cookie fortune cookie tell me tell me what there's a lot of possibilities in there. I love your answer and i have your reason why thank you for delivering such a powerful message to my clients i honor you i respect you i salute you. Thank you i appreciate it.