Gratitude in Action: An Eagle Scout's Journey to Honoring the People Who Made Us

Hi, everyone. Welcome back to Real Work, where we explore the grit and strategy behind how we choose to spend our time and energy, whether in our careers, our communities, or our next purposeful chapter. I'm Jennifer Tarl, your host. And have you ever looked back at your life and realized that you didn't actually get here alone? We like to think of ourselves as self-made, but the truth is we become who we are because someone decided to invest in us. Today, I am sitting down with Rob Bukolsky about a powerful trip down memory lane. Rob organized a special tour back to Camp Mayaconda, bringing together his brothers, his old scouting friends, and even his former Scoutmasters to intentionally honor these men who shaped him. It's a striking reminder that when these leaders were teaching skills, showing up on freezing weekends, and encouraging kids, they were just doing the work. They weren't looking for applause, and they likely had no idea of what they were building and the legacy that they would leave. We are diving into what it means to recognize people who made us who we are, why gratitude is an action rather just a feeling, and how we take the lessons from our past to a clear and better path for the next generation. So join me in welcoming Rob. Hey, Rob, how are you? I'm having a great day. Thanks for having me here. Yeah. Okay. I'm super excited about this. So I'm super proud to say Rob is my husband, and he is an Eagle Scout. And scouting was a huge part of his childhood and adolescence. And you always just talk about the great lessons and the amazing memories. And recently, you, I think, saw on Facebook, and you can tell the story, that you could take a tour of your former Boy Scout camp. So why don't we start there and tell me what is Camp Mayaconda, and what did you see on Facebook? Yeah. So for me, something that really impacted me as a child, we had a very strong scouting organization in my neighborhood, where a lot of the local dads would volunteer, and the men in the neighborhood would do that. Extremely positive experience on my side. Now, for you, or anybody listening, it may not be scouting, it can be any other person that helped you out. And that as you reflect back saying, wow, they really invested a lot of time in me, and really helped make me the person who I am. And so that was something that was always been in the back of my head, especially as I have a I'm amazed how much this comes back, and how much of an impact it has. And of course, she just loves all the stories, they're crazy stories, you know, but good lessons learned. And so once I'm on Facebook, I was on there, and I saw from the old campground we would go to quite often, was called Camp Mayaconda. That's where we went quite a bit. And I saw there was a Facebook page that was posting pictures of Camp Mayaconda. And there was a really great guy who was the administrator of that site of that community. And someone was asking for a tour of Camp Mayaconda, said, I haven't been there in decades, I would love to see what it looks like. And he said, Sure, if you're interested, just direct message me. And I'm like, Whoa, so I'm watching this saying, Yeah, what am I waiting for? Let me direct message this person and see, could I arrange something like that? And I will tell you, first of all, I was thinking about a tour for myself. That was my first thought. And I would bring my daughter and I will bring you. Yeah, I would show them this was a big thing for me, and had a big impact. And so I look, I direct message, a fellow named Nelson, who ended up being fantastic, you know, with just saying, absolutely, this is what we want to do. We want to engage alumni members, we want to do this. Absolutely what we want to do. So then after my discussion with Nelson, I got to be thinking about you know what, why did I like Camp Mayaconda so much? It's not camp. It was the leadership and the people at the camp. And those are the people that I said, you know what, instead of me just going there, the first order of business should be taking the people that made that possible. So I did reach out to the people that I know as the Scoutmasters, or the basically the leaders who were in charge when I was when I was a kid, and said, is this something you would be interested in as a thank you from me to you? Yeah, I would organize this. And of course, they're all like, yeah, I'll do that immediately. Of course, 100%. Now, just so you know, though, I did need some special accommodations, because people, some people have some knee and hip replacements and everything may not be able to do as much hiking as before. And Nelson at Camp Mayaconda, talk about heroes appearing when you need them. He said no problem. We have a golf cart that I can get people on. And we'll take them all around. I'm like, you have got to be kidding me. You're gonna provide that? Yeah, that's what we'll do. Sure enough, that's exactly what he did. So that is what we arranged. So it ended up morphing from showing me and my family the tour. It changed to me showing gratitude to the people who invested in me. And what better way so than having them tour the actual places that really made an impact on us. So it was seven total people we were able to have for this initial tour. And it went absolutely fantastically. Like, if you haven't done anything like this, the only regret I had is I hadn't done it early, that I waited this long. That was the only regret I had was, why didn't I do this early? Why didn't I? Because it went fabulously. I would absolutely encourage anyone who has someone that they feel gratitude towards and have to thank, just take some action, just do something. It doesn't have to be perfect. And this wasn't perfect. It was really good. It was really good. So I love that you're not necessarily a thank you note person, but you will go above and beyond to thank people through your actions. And you have reached out to your former Scoutmasters before. And I know that you are also a person who might just send a little text to be like, hey, I saw this, and I was thinking about you. And I think that goes such a long way. So can you tell me about some of the other things that you've done to show these men gratitude? Because you have been doing this for a long time, showing this gratitude. And I want to get more into the Camp Mayaconda tour, but I think that's a good place to start. How do people do this? What are some of the things that they can do? Well, the biggest thing that I've learned in reaching out is, as I've gotten older, you realize you didn't get here alone. Your successes were not alone. And you have some people to thank about that. But as I would sometimes reach out and just schedule lunch or dinner with some people who have done this, I would do that. When I would meet with them, what I found that they got the most out of is they had no idea what impact they had. So they just loved hearing that. You're kidding me. It was never their plan to have a huge impact. They were just doing what they thought was right. So what they loved hearing the most was, how did my life change? And how did somebody else's life change because of them? And they're just amazed at it. Again, it was something that was just unintended. So to me, the best mentors, they just don't keep score. They're not expecting anything. It was just never a thought that you're going to do a payback. That was just ridiculous to them. What they loved hearing, and especially as my daughter got into scouting, is, oh, tell me about what she's doing. Wow. Okay. And how is she doing it? How is she doing this? Or others in her troop or others that were doing, they loved hearing those stories. So I would reach out via text, via email. And I just love, I'm going to take you to lunch. That's what I'm going to do. No agenda or anything. I'm going to come and I'm just going to take you to lunch. And that's it. Just as a thank you. It doesn't have to be anything grand. And everybody is exactly as you would guess, very gracious. Never saying, oh, yeah, I did this for this purpose. No, that was never the reason. They just loved hearing how things got paid forward. So that was the best thing is not to hear about how great they were. They loved hearing about the actions going forward, just can't get enough of that. They want to know about the future, the future generation, what is going on. So that is what I learned is they want to know less about themselves and know more about the impact on others. So for people who don't know, what do you actually do as a Boy Scout or a Girl Scout? What exactly is it? And what did you do as a kid? Because I find it amazing what these men did when they had families and jobs and all the things. They did. So my opinion is scouting, just like other organizations, a big national organization, but it really depends on your local group. They vary vastly based on who your local group is. I was absolutely blessed that an extremely good group of leaders were there and they just set the agenda of what we're going to do. In fact, the motto they had for the group was on the move. He goes, we're going to be on the move. So we're going to do something every single month. We're going to have activity. I don't know what it's going to be, but that is our goal. Every month, we're going to give these kids something new. So we're talking age ranges from anywhere from like 11, 12, all the way up through high school. And then there are a series of it's called merit badges you get like in first aid, emergency preparedness, citizenship in the nation, things that you learn and earn along the way. Also outdoorsy stuff like the camping merit badge and hiking merit badge and classic things like that. Lots of campouts. So you learn to be on your own, independent. No one's there to ask for assistance other than the normal stuff. You're in charge of you. If you didn't pack something, well, that's on you and you got to figure it out. Leaders are there to help you learn how to be independent. So how to solve problems. And so there's a series of campouts you go to, competitions, badges. There's a lot, but a lot of it depends on who the local leadership is, who's your local leader. And by the way, people aren't getting paid. These are all volunteers for the most part. Almost everybody's a volunteer. And as I've learned something I didn't think about as a child, when they're doing these campouts, and sometimes it's a week long summer camp, they didn't get any extra time off of work for this. No, they use their paid time off to go do this. So again, as a kid that didn't register. I was like, oh, you only may only get two weeks a year off. You may only get, that's what they used it for. So now as a kid, I get to appreciate as an adult the sacrifices they made. But for me, again, it might be for the users or for the listeners. They may have a different organization or different people that mentored them. For me, it was this group. So this was my group of mentors that really helped and invested in me. So tell me more about Camp Mayaconda, where is it and what makes it special and unique? Well, for me, the biggest thing, it is in Toledo, Ohio. That's where I grew up. And it was the closest Boy Scout camp to us. We would go there the most often. And so we did a lot of competitions there and we just know it very well. So we would go. And it was a mixture of different types of campouts. Sometimes you have a cabin campout, sometimes you have a tent campout. Sometimes you pitch your own, you make your own shelter, all different, all different things that you do. Now, what I learned, which was a great tour when we took this tour, one thing I never paid attention to was, well, how was this camp even formed? Because as a child, it didn't matter to me. It was just always there. So I actually learned a lot of new things of when this was built. It's actually one of the oldest scouting camps in the country. I think it's the sixth oldest. So this was built in the early 1900s, not long after scouting was formed. It was sponsored by some of the greatest entrepreneurs in the area. I mean, the biggest risk takers, the ones who are like just going to do things. And so they did that. They said, we're going to create one of the premier scouting camps in the land. That's what we're going to do. And that's what they did. So they created that. So that's something that I never really just had an appreciation for were the people who did this. Didn't have to do it. Nobody told them to. It was pure philanthropy. And they're like, we're going to do it. We're going to do it well. And so they did. So this was, again, we're talking early 1900s of when this was formed. And then of course, it's evolved over time as far as what's there and what's not. So it's evolved over time. But for generations now, this is generations, scouts in the Toledo, Ohio area have gone there. And what's amazing to me is it's still there. And it's still a vibrant place. We're there. They're getting ready for day camp. And there are scouts all over the place. It was really something to see. We didn't know what it was going to be like. We got there and like, there's a lot of updates that have been made. It was very gratifying to see that this is in good hands. This is very relevant today. So it was something to be able to see from the past we were able to experience. But then you also saw this is moving into the future. They're not just resting on the past and the past accomplishments. They're absolutely looking to move into the future as well. So what were some of the things that everybody enjoyed, or that they found sort of interesting about the tour? Any good stories? Oh, so many. The biggest thing for me is these are some very confident gentlemen who were who are used to getting things done. But what was great for me was to see them they remember every one of them. I was 12 years old. This was my first camp out. And that's the exact spot. That was my place where I went to sleep the very first time. And they'll tell you what they were scared. They'll tell you what they were homesick. They go, I remember that time. And it was there. I mean, it's still there. That's the exact spot. And they will tell you all the stories on that. Again, this is before you've had cell phones and everything else. And so that to me really hit is everybody remember the exact time they did this. And they were taking a risk. As a kid, like this is a risk. They were putting themselves out there. You know, parents weren't there. They were on their own with the leaders. But just how proud they were like, yeah, it was right there. And I remember it like it was yesterday. So to me, those are the big stories that I really liked. And then they were able to tell about how things have evolved over time. Obviously, because some of the places I noticed is not gonna be a shock to people. Some of the things that were built in you know, 1950 weren't exactly to the safety standards of today. Yes. Like towers that you would climb and everything with your that would not pass today. And then also a big thing there is they did have the world's largest swimming pool for a while. And to call it a swimming pool is a bit of an exaggeration. It was more like a lake. And it was freezing cold, it was spring set. And so everybody had stories about swimming in that pool. Because that's where you would get your canoeing merit badge was in that quote, unquote pool. But it was to call it a pool is by today's standards, it's not a pool. Remember, as a kid going, that's not a pool. That's like, it had gravel on the bottom. Yeah, it was something that everybody remembers. And even Nelson, who was our tour guide, did say what he never swam in it. But he said, everybody remembers how ice cold ice cold it was. Yeah. But again, you were a kid, you didn't care that it was cold, like it was so I do it is no longer there. But you can see where it was, obviously, you can see the ravine where it was. And you can see some remnants of it. There's a new pool that is a modern, but it's nowhere near the gigantic size that was the old pool. So those are the two things I would mention is just everybody could remember and take themselves back to when they were a child and their camping experiences. And then secondly, a lot of the locations that were there, they could definitely relate to that it's still there. The third thing I'd mentioned is the recognition that it's still relevant, that this is still being invested in because people didn't know what to expect. They didn't know whether to see whether this was going to be a rundown or something. They just didn't know. And then what a feeling to say, wow, this is getting reinvented for our next generation. It's getting revision, rethought through, and reinvented. And everybody loved that, which is you still have a lot of the old stuff there. But you're also moving into the new world. So what did you learn from scouting? We actually talked about this because we had lunch afterwards. And the number one big thing that we heard we learned was the model of the troop on the move, which is to do things like yeah, you just do things and good things will occur. Like do things number one. And number two is you're in charge of you and you can accomplish anything. I expect you high expectations that you're going to figure things out. And everybody had a story as when they were putting a challenge situation, which they didn't know the exact answer, but they were going to figure it out. And everybody had faith that they were going to figure it out. They had the capability to figure this out. You're going to solve this problem. I don't know how you're going to solve it. And I'll help you if you need it. But it's it is not a question of well, just throwing my hands up and saying I can't solve this problem. No, you're going to solve it. No matter how old you are, or young didn't matter. You're in charge of you. Now today, I said we would call that high agency that you have high agency. Of course, we didn't call it that at the time, right? At the time, it was like, no, you're just gonna figure this up. You're going to figure this out. And I have faith that you are going to figure it out. You're going to just do it. Again, today, high agency is what we would call it. So that's what I call it, or we would call it in today's terms, is that you can figure things out no matter what it is. Yeah. Yeah, I just know scouting was just huge, and very influential to you and your brothers and not just you and your brothers, but all of your friends. From growing up, it was just such an incredible organization, very formative. And I just love that you honored all of your scouting friends and scout masters. And I know that they just absolutely loved it. So I like to close with what's one thing that people can do to show their gratitude to someone who's helped them? What could they do? The biggest thing I would tell people is don't wait. Again, that's what my biggest regret is. Why didn't I do this previously? Why did I wait till now? Who knows? So do something and don't make it perfect. Just do something. Do it. Was it the exact right day? Was it the exact right time? I don't know. But I said, we're going to get this on the calendar, or it's not going to happen. And I just know that and it's not going to be perfect. And that's fine. It's better to get started. And I remember even telling you when I'm leaving, I don't know if this is going to work. Yeah. But I'm doing this. So we're doing this. And I hope it's good. And I said, I consider this exploratory. So my biggest suggestion is everybody knows someone who helped. Everybody. And you're like, it might be weird. I haven't talked to them in a while. It's not weird. Just reach out. It's not. In fact, it's very appreciative. It doesn't have to be perfect. And I think you will be surprised at taking action. Again, how gratitude is a feeling you have. But when you marry that to an action, just how much that amplifies the feeling. So just take some action and just get something on the calendar. Okay. So let's all do that. Everybody let's think of one person reach out today, even if it's just a simple text message saying, hello, I was thinking about you plan lunch or breakfast, or even just a phone call if you are far away. So Rob, I'm going to thank you on behalf of all of your scouting friends and former scout leaders. I know they really, really had an amazing time. So thanks so much, everyone, and have an amazing day.