Women Get Obsessed with Men Who Talk to Them Like This | Dr Orion Taraban

One of the things I've never forgotten from when I was 18 years old and I was reading those books about seduction and pick-up artistry is it talks about how to deal with a 10. 10 out of 10. What did they say? Well, it basically says you kind of need to be a bit of an arsehole. Not an arsehole in the sense of being rude or whatever, but you kind of need to. So say if you were a 10 and we're out dinner, I didn't know who you were, but there was a group of very attractive women here and you were the one that I wanted and you were the 10. I wouldn't talk to you, right? You wouldn't talk to me, but the strategy it says is to basically pay attention to everybody else. And then when the 10 tries to talk to you, go one second and then just keep talking to everybody else. And it's that small communication that I high value that kind of would evoke their interest and curiosity. Why does this man not maybe like pander to me like all other men have always done? What is it about him that he's got such confidence that he will give me a slight neg? You know, nines and tens are not a different species than the fives and sixes. And what are the women who tend to really be interested in most guys? The ones who are pursuing the ones who stick around who want those long-term relationships for better for worse. They're often the ones that the men kind of kind of have this take it or leave it attitude towards and they're not going out of their way, which can seem like they're very confident. They're very composed. They're self-possessed. There might be something special or attractive about this guy because he's not pursuing me. I'm pursuing him which can reduce cognitive dissonance in the direction of increasing attraction because I think about it. I don't usually go out of my way for people and yet I'm going out of my way for this man. Why am I doing that? It must be because I really like this guy, right? Sometimes our emotions only arise out of our behavior. People sometimes think we have an emotion that we act. Sometimes we act and then we have an emotion, right? So getting people it's like it's not possible to get others to like you more by liking them more. That's one of the biggest errors in dating and one of the best little strategies to increase interest is to ask other people to do things for you because it takes advantage of this little cognitive hack that I just described. You don't Stephen. You don't go out of your way doing favors for people. If I asked you a small but reasonable favor and you executed it then consciously or not, you're going to think wow, I don't usually do favors. I did a favor for Orion. He might be a pretty decent dude. Like maybe there's something to this guy because give me an example. So if I say could you could you grab that for me one second? I point that's one of the easiest ways to do it. Sometimes it's just I've seen it in pickup where you can just say you're talking to somebody and be like, you know, it's a little loud. Can we just let's just step like two steps to the side. Just that two steps and complying with that reasonable request elevates unconscious attraction. It also is an opportunity to create what you might call a yes chain, which is related to foot in the door, which is you're more likely to comply with a larger request. If I first get you to consent to a number of smaller reasonable requests first, it's not the only way but it's one way to potentially undermine resistance.