Building Bridges With Words: Overcoming Communication Barriers In Relationships

My brethren, I greet you this day with words from the Lord. I find the Word of God is so important, and if we use it properly, we will always get the proper result. I like the song entitled, The Bible Stands. The writer said, The Bible stands like a rock undaunted amid the raging storms of time. Its pages borne with the truth eternal, and they glow with a light sublime. The second stanza, The Bible stands like a mounting towering far above the works of men. Its truth by none ever was refuted, and destroy it they never can. The third stanza, The Bible stands, and it will forever, when the world has passed away. By inspiration it has been given all its precepts, I will obey. And then the last stanza says, The Bible stands, every test we give it, for its author is divine. By grace alone I expect to live it, and to prove it, and make it mine. The chorus, The Bible stands, though the hills may tumble, it will firmly stand when the earth shall crumble. I will plant my feet on its foundation, for the Bible stands. That's the reason why I'm sharing with you words from the Word, because the Word of God stood every test. It continues to stand. It's the only sure guide that we have. In my last devotion, I close by telling you that in order to be a good communicator, we must be a good listener. So in these devotions, we are looking at what destroys the marriage relationship at times, and we see that that communication, miscommunication, communicating in the wrong way, has caused so much problem, has destroyed so many relationships, just misunderstanding. I find very interesting when people think they have to answer before they hear and understand the question, what is meant by listening? When you are truly listening to another person, you're not thinking about how you're going to form your answer, or what you're going to see when they stop speaking. You're not busy formulating your response. When you are listening, you're concentrating on what is being said in order to understand what you will say. You need to understand what is said. When we properly listen to someone, you should be able to repeat what the person said and what you thought or what he or she was feeling when speaking to you or to us. I say listening is complete acceptance without judgment of what is said or how it is said. Now too often, we fail to get the message because we either don't like the message or the tone of the voice. Sometimes we miss the message because of the messenger, but it is the message that is important. Now, one may get up to preach the word of God because one may not like the speaker. One missed the message from God and that message from God may have been for you. Always remember the person that is speaking based on how he or she sees a thing or feels about it, he or she will speak. Let me say that again. Always remember the person that is speaking based on how he or she sees a thing or feels about it. A story sounds true until the other side is told and set the record straight. Proverbs 18 and verse 70, he that is forced in his own cause seemeth just, but his neighbor cometh and searcheth him. Yeah, you always look right, song right to yourself, but are you right is what matters. The wise man learns by listening, Proverbs 21 11, when the scorner is punished, the simple is made wise, and when the wise is instructed, he receiveth knowledge. Now, hear and understand before speaking. That's good advice to us. Proverbs 18 13, he that answereth a matter before he hearth it, it is folly and shame unto him. Learn to understand before we speak. Sometimes you are trying to explain something to somebody and before you can get the second line out, they are ready to answer. And sometimes when they answer, they have answered so far off to what you were going to say. And then when you get a chance to explain to them, but that's not what I was going to say. This is what I was going to say. And then they say, I'm sorry, sorry for what? If one would have waited to hear the matter before answering, one would not be ashamed. Be ready to listen. James 1 19 says, wherefore my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath. Be ready to listen, be swift to hear, be slow to speak, and slow to wrath, be slow in anger. Should I expect conflict in my marriage? That's the question. Should I expect it? May I say to you, conflict is a fact of life. It should not be a surprise. Conflict reminds me of pain in my body. It is normal as long as you live, you'll experience some sort of pain from time to time. Pain tells me something is wrong. So the doctor sometimes need to know. These things we need to tell the doctor. The doctor asks you, tell me, we're hurting you. And he needs to know. And when he hears we're hurting you, then he begins to figure out what may be causing the problem. Now, one may ask, why does conflict occur? The answer is because we are human beings. We are imperfect people, whom God graciously loves in spite of our imperfections. Each of us has our desires, wants, needs, and goals. When any of those differ from the other person, conflict occurs. Our beliefs, ideas, feelings, and behaviors will be different. The difference in themselves are not the problem, but rather our reaction to them. Not every disagreement may need to be resolved. For instance, if election is called back home, I may just be in favor of someone that my wife is not in favor of. Are we going to cause problems over that? When I go to vote, I go alone. And when she goes to vote, she goes alone. She votes for who she wants. I do the same. Always remember, conflict is a natural part of growth and family living. Many times, conflict is only symptoms of something else. Most people don't deal openly and correctly with conflicts because no one ever taught them how to deal with such conflicts. There are many ways people choose to deal with conflict. Some people withdraw and don't even try to deal. Some seek to win, no matter the cost. Some yield, just let that have its way. Some compromise, that is to give up on the right and to take some of the wrong. Some resolve conflicts, whatever it is, let's see how we can deal with it to bring about the best solution. In our marriage, if we learn how to communicate, we will save ourselves a lot of pain, a lot of sorrow, a lot of struggles. May God help us as we think before we speak, as we listen to the other person and always know that what they're saying is important to them. God loves you, and so do I, and we can love each other. May God bless you as you continue in your relationship, trying to find healing and comfort one to another. Have a great day. Father, thank you so much for this journey that we have taken, God reminding our brothers and our sisters, our loved ones, our friends, our neighbors, our listeners, God, how miscommunication can mess up a relationship. And as we try to communicate better, may you will be done in our lives and may we experience the results. We love you, praise you, thank you for every listener and everyone that has shared and is sharing. For it is in Jesus' name I pray for his sake, amen and amen. God bless you. We start a new series next morning.