Are You Creating Your Own Suffering?

Can suffering be caused by rejection, or is something deeper taking place? Could heartbreak become the doorway to discovering the peace that isn't dependent on another person?

Rupert says: ‘Instead of escaping your discomfort, turn towards it and welcome it. Investigate the one who feels rejected and discover that your suffering is sustained by the thought, “I don't like what's happening.” The separate self survives by resisting the present moment and continually referring to the past or future.’

‘See clearly that what you essentially are is not your thoughts, feelings or personal story but the aware presence that knows every experience. When this is recognised, the burden of psychological suffering falls away, revealing the peace, happiness and love that are your own true nature.’

*This video is from one of Rupert’s in-person retreats at The Vedanta, 21–28 November 2025. For more information on upcoming retreats (many of which can be attended online via livestream) go to:

▸ https://rupertspira.com/events

Timestamps:

0:00 Heartbreak and Spiritual Practice
4:02 You're Doing Your Suffering
8:11 Discovering the True 'I'
12:00 Awareness Beyond Mind and Body
16:24 What Is Always Present?
20:10 Being and Awareness Are One
24:04 Peace Is Your True Nature

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