So You're Willing to Date a Magician - SNL
A hilarious parody dating game show sketch from Saturday Night Live. The contestant Tracy, who recently ended a long relationship and is not feeling picky, is tasked with choosing between four incredibly obnoxious and eccentric bachelor magicians for a second date. From an egotistical sleight-of-hand performer to a bizarre endurance artist who inflicts self-pain, each bachelor showcases their weirdest tricks and awkward habits, leaving Tracy questioning her choices.
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Video Summary
AI GeneratedTracy, a woman recently out of a relationship, dates four eccentric magicians on a dating show. After a series of bizarre encounters involving narcissism, age deception, self-harm, and overbearing family members, Tracy finds all the candidates unsuitable and chooses not to go on a cruise with any of them.
Welcome back to You're Willing to Date a Magician.
We have four bachelor magicians hoping to cast
their spell on our contestant, Tracy.
Tracy, why do you want to date a magician?
Well, I just got out of a two-year relationship
with a DJ, so I'm not feeling that picky.
Ah, well, that's fine.
Now let's meet our four single magicians.
Marconius Wilde is a sleight-of-hand magician
who divides his time between Las Vegas, Nevada
Tracy, tonight I am a king,
and I am hoping that you will be.
Tracy, check your pocket.
Oh, my God, it's a queen of hearts.
You're going to want to keep that.
Yeah, I need that back.
Right then.
Yes, next is Henry Vandazzle.
Henry calls himself an artisan of amazement
on his LinkedIn page.
Charmed, milady.
I always said no shackles could hold me until I met you.
Yeah, it's a cool party trick.
If only one could be invited to a party.
Okay, next is Dante Raven.
Dante is described as a body-endurance artist
and the prince of self-inflicted pain.
Hey, Tracy, I'm the guy for you.
I once snorted a billiard ball
to impress Bumaral Tarama,
but enough about me, I better hold my tongue.
No, no, please, not again.
Why, why, Dante, why?
She don't like that, Dante.
That's not magic, that's not magic.
Finally, we have Justin Bird
from the brother-and-sister team Birds of Prey.
Fans say their act violates the laws of time and space.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, indeed.
And those are only some of the laws
my sister and I have violated.
Yeah, he's nice, but it's weird
that his sister's always with him.
Don't want my sister around?
Well, I can easily make her disappear.
The next, oh, I thought I lost you.
Okay, Tracy, you were asked to go on a date
with each of our bachelor magicians.
Let's start with Marconius Wilde.
What did you do with him?
He said he'd already eaten,
so he took me to a bookstore where we browsed for three hours
until he accidentally found a book
where he was mentioned in the thank yous.
It's an intriguing title called Houdini's Mistress.
Check your pocket, Michelle.
Oh, man, he signed it.
That's so, yeah, I need that back.
Really?
All right, then, let's go to Henry Van Dazzle.
How was your date with him?
It was a little weird.
Took me to this burlesque show
that they do a month in a pickle factory in Brooklyn.
Ah, burlesque, the thinking man's erotica.
Yeah, I guess he thought that made it okay.
And fun fact, I saw his ID.
He's 55.
That ID is merely an illusion
that I use to get senior discounts at Denny's.
Okay, dude, um, let's get over to Dante Raven.
How did that go?
Dante said he was gonna take me
on a freaky journey inside the mind.
Okay. But we actually went to
a very modestly-priced Italian restaurant.
Nice.
Later, when they brought the check,
he asked if he could pay by running a sewing needle
through his testicles, and they said no.
But I did it anyway,
for I have mastered my pain.
No, Dante. No.
Yeah, man.
How about Justin Bird?
Where did he take you?
Oh, we went to Chili's, which would have been fine.
But his sister sat at a table nearby
and just kind of stared at me the whole time.
Kind of like that.
It also got awkward when our waiter came.
Why is that?
Because it was me.
Waiting tables is my side hustle, I believe.
It's his main hustle.
Okay, Tracy, if you're willing to go on a moonlit cruise
with one of these guys, we'll pay for it.
Who will it be?
Marconius, Henry, Dante, or Justin?
Oh, man, it's so hard to pick one.
Would it be possible to pick nobody?
Well, that's what happened last week,
so let's do it again.
When we come back, we'll tell you why, Dante, why.