YOU GOTTA BE OKAY WITH BEING THE “VILLAIN” OF YOUR FAMILY #npd #narcissist #narcissisticabuse

Y'all Merry Christmas. It's a spiritual whistleblower with another video. I hope y'all are having a beautiful holiday, a very peaceful one, narcissistic free. I'm just doing what I do, dropping more videos in this video. I'm going to preach to y'all and I really want you to pay attention to this video. Okay, somebody somewhere needs to hear this. Listen to me. You have to be okay with being the villain if it means having peace in your life. I will repeat, you have to be okay with being the villain in order to live a peaceful life. Now, this can apply in so many different scenarios. If you are just getting out of a romantic relationship that was extremely abusive, you were with a narcissist, this absolutely can be applied to that. But because it's the holidays and this time of year, um, so many people deal with toxic parents, toxic family members. I'm going to make this video, uh, to address the abusive behaviors of narcissistic family, mother, father, grandparents, narcissistic brother, sister, cousins, aunts, uncles, etc we are going to address the toxic dynamic of uh being a part of a narcissistic family in my case it's on both sides my mother and father's side um if you are the scapegoat of the family which I was from the time that you are born you are hated okay and a lot of you I don't know how far back your memory goes for me my memory goes all the way back I have memories from when I was three and four years old. Photographic memory, down to the smell, the scent, the environment, my parents' first apartment, second apartment, the motels. I know where each motel that we lived in is located in Bordentown, Hamilton, Cherry Hill, Pensacola, Mount Holly. I remember everything. And those memories are deeply embedded of all the trauma, all the horrific fights that you witnessed amongst your parents, the dysfunction, the toxicity, the constant bullying, you struggling to make good grades in class because you have a learning disability or an undiagnosed developmental disability, which I did. But your parents didn't bother to get you evaluated they didn't care to get you evaluated baby baby boomer parents because i'm gen x so my parents are from the baby boomer generation baby boomer parents were only concerned with partying uh getting high off of cocaine or they were too busy fighting and cheating on each other they just were all together ******* dysfunctional and they did not have children out of love the majority of them had children number one to trap and control their partner to have a permanent attachment to their partner number two they had babies because their families pressured them to society pressured them and the family it was all about the appearance of looking happy and having a husband wife and children but deep down inside they were all miserable and they bullied and punish their children as a result of being ******* miserable with each other so therefore my generation and even the millennials we paid a hefty price for our parents misery so they had children not because they wanted to happily um nurture and love on their children they didn't have emotional connection they did not have no empathy but the child was nothing more than a pawn to help them keep up with the appearances of a happy family when deep down inside they were ******* miserable and fighting behind closed doors and the children are the innocent ones caught in the middle of the crossfire and that's from the the pressures of their family and society pressuring them to get married and have kids and they were not ready they were not equipped with the resources they were deeply broken and all of them belonged in therapy because a lot of them are dealing with unhealed trauma from their parents and grandparents and because baby boomer the baby boomers refuse to get therapy they're ******* delusional they don't believe that they have any issues they lack accountability they skipped over getting therapy they skipped over healing and they passed their brokenness and unhealed trauma onto their children therefore my generation we are now picking up the pieces we got to go to therapy for the things our parents did to us so um that's one of the reasons why baby boomers had children it was about keeping up with appearances they didn't give a ---- about the kids they just wanted the appearance of looking like a happily married couple with a family fake smiles in the photographs whole time these motherfuckers is partying or they're cheating or they're fighting one another miserable with each other and they will take out that anger and frustration and bully their children so you're the scapegoat your memories if your memories are like mine are locked in from your early childhood days and usually the child that remembers the most usually the oldest child i'm the oldest child i have two siblings the oldest child will remember the most toxic ---- about their parents the oldest child will usually remind mom and dad the oldest child is like a mirror I know my parents hate me because I remember every fucked up thing they did see my sister is the baby my sister has no recollection my sister doesn't realize she missed a lot of the drama that me and my baby brother witnessed but being the oldest child my parents know I remember everything and I am a reminder of their **** ups and flaws I will constantly ******* remind them of how bad they fucked up how piss poor their parent their parenting was how traumatizing they was how ignorant and selfish they were towards their children I am the reminder and that's why I know I'm ******* hated I am the scapegoat I am the latchkey kid when I was in second grade how old was I in second grade seven eight years old I don't remember but I had a key and because my parents weren't home after school us latchkey kids had to take the key I wore the key around my neck on a necklace went home after school unlocked the door went home to an empty excuse me motel I was about to say apartment we lived in motels run down low budget motels unlocked the door to the motel I had to make sure my siblings uh ate whether I fixed them you know a snack or dinner you know you know that at a young age you were forced to be the third parent in the household this is what we call parentification when your mother and father groom you to be the third parent in the household robbing you of your childhood because you're too busy babysitting and or taking on the responsibilities of an adult a lot of us got in high school and had to work two and three jobs like I did to help pay the bills my mother took all my paychecks in high school she wouldn't work she laid her fat ass on the couch but every friday when i got paid and this is why i'm in high school working two jobs as a cashier at Bi-Lo the Bi-Lo supermarket and i also had a part-time job working for a tax company bitch took all my paychecks she wouldn't work but she used my paychecks to pay the bills and put food on the table that is parentification when your parents turn you into an adult and they take away they rob you of your childhood when you should be out having fun with your teenage friends and going to the mall shopping instead your home taking on the role of a parent it's fucked up and it's ******* selfish and it also grooms you to become a doormat a people pleaser a people pleaser a nurse a caretaker so when you become an adult you don't know how to turn off this people pleaser behavior and you end up having no boundaries because that's how mom and dad trained you and because you have no boundaries you attract abusive people into your life who take further advantage of your kindness your ability to be a caretaker a nurse a doormat somebody without a backbone somebody that is groomed to take orders and never to speak up for themselves okay you are the scapegoat but what happens what is happening right now is that all of us that were raised by these toxic baby boomer parents we've hit a wall we're tired we are now fighting back we are telling our baby boomer parents no more we will not tolerate the disrespect the bullying the constant control the coercive control trying to control my children trying to control my relationships talking about me behind my back you gave birth to me but you talk about me like i'm a side chick who stole your motherfucking man you're in the streets talking about your child you piece of ******* ---- this is what the baby boomer generation does they are the trashiest worst types of ******* parents and they justify their behavior by saying well we did the best we could at least you had a roof over your head food on the table clothes on your back that's the that's their lame ass excuse no material possessions or anything financial food clothing roof over your head that is material and that is financial that does not equate to emotional connection and or love. It's not love. It's an obligation. You have to take care of your children or you will get in trouble by law. There will be a penalty, a consequence if you do not provide for your children financially. They know that, but they'll use that to gaslight and throw it in your face. And then they'll say, oh, that's love. If we didn't love you, we wouldn't have provided for you. And no, no, no, baby. No, no, no, no. That's not love. You tried it though. so you've been the scapegoat your entire life and now you've you're at a point now where you're ready to fight back you're ready to take a stand you're tired of the bullying you're not taking ---- off your family anymore so as scary as it is as it may seem you decide to set a boundary and cut family off now what's going to happen your name is going to be dragged through the mud because family cannot further abuse you. You have removed yourself as the scapegoat. When the scapegoat cuts family off, your family is full of narcissists. So if there is no scapegoat, all the narcissists will scramble. They're gonna scramble around looking for a new scapegoat. You were never supposed to escape. That was not the plan. Who are they going to bully now? Who are they going to tease and pick on if the scapegoat is not around? now they got to break their backs and look for a new scapegoat but in the meantime while they're looking for a new scapegoat they're going to cyber stalk the **** out of you they're going to try to reach out to you they're going to try to guilt trip you and try to pull you back in they're going to say things to you like go on and give your mother another chance at the end of the day they steal your mother they steal your father blood is thicker than water you know the bible says honor thy mother and thy father don't be like that you still holding on to that grudge you still holding on to the past why don't you get over it baby they gonna listen they gonna try their best to guilt trip the **** out of you to try to get you to break no contact to come back into the toxic family structure they swim in a cesspool of dysfunction and they're mad that you decided that you do not want to participate in that cesspool of dysfunction you want out you want to change you want a new life you want a new beginning you want to go to therapy you want to break the generational trauma the generational cycle you don't want to be a part of the bullshit no more they are mad that you escaped so they are collectively working together to figure out how do we pull the scapegoat back into this toxic family structure who can we bully if the scapegoat is now no longer here we have to scramble now and look for a new scapegoat and meanwhile while we're looking for a new scapegoat let's all work together collectively to try to suck the old scapegoat back in. If y'all are wondering why your family members are constantly cyber stalking you, they don't, you know, a lot of us are business owners. I'm a business owner. A lot of y'all are wondering why your family does not support your business. They don't like none of your pages. They don't pay or spend money for none of your products, but they sit back and they're watching total strangers. You got total strangers supporting your business and buying your products. look at me I didn't publish eight books on Amazon one of those books is a top seller my best-selling book is called my family can kiss my ass at one point my book ranked number 13 on Amazon in the child abuse category you know how ******* amazing that is there's a lot of competition. I'm competing with a lot of authors on Amazon and my book ranked at number 13 in the child abuse category. That's how well my book did because it was not my family that was purchasing my books. It was total strangers purchasing my book and supporting me. Your greatest support is going to come from total strangers. It's never going to come from family. So your family is now sitting back with their jealous hateful asses they're watching all these strangers support you and brag about you and love on you, they fanning over you and what's happening, you're getting stronger and you're staying far away from family and you're realizing you were always amazing and it was your family that was keeping your self-esteem low, your family were your biggest haters, your family was the biggest gossipers and lying on you and all that, you're realizing all this and say, wait a minute, I'm doing all right without my family so now when family sees that you're catching on to the games that they were playing the whole time and you're, you're staying strong and you're not breaking no contact and you're not going back, oh baby, they're going to talk about you like a dog, they've been talking about you but it's going to get real bad when they realize they can't get you to break no contact when you reject them, when you block them when you shut down all their attempts that you know they're trying to reach out to you and you will not, you will not communicate, you've changed your phone number, you've blocked them on Facebook it's no more talking, you're let, you're letting your actions speak, your actions say **** all y'all don't talk to me now because when I was a part of the family you treated me like ----, you made me feel like an outcast, you excluded me, you talked about how fat I was, you told everybody I couldn't keep a man, you told me, you told everybody I was ******* miserable bitch I don't want to be a part of the family now, don't try to pull me back in now bitch I'm doing better now I'm thriving I'm looking good I'm successful I don't need your money I don't need you to support my business I got hundreds of thousands of total strangers that are paying their hard-earned money to support my business, so **** all y'all, **** you when they see that you're standing on business and you're not breaking no contact and you have no desire to be a part of the family you don't want to be invited to the family reunion you don't want to be invited to the family cookout bitch don't invite me to no baby shower no weddings don't bitch I'm not coming to no funerals I don't give a **** who dies when they realize you're standing on your boundaries you don't give a **** you don't want to be bothered oh the smear campaign oh ---- you're going to be vilified she thinks she all that yeah I do think I'm all that and did yep I think I'm all that bitch when my ass had low self-esteem and I was fat I was near 300 pounds you sat up and talked about me she's miserable she's fat she's sloppy she can't dress she can't keep a man okay so I got my act together I dropped the weight I got a better wardrobe I started my small business I finished college a bitch leveled up now what the **** is your problem now it's oh she thinks she's all that make up your mind either you want me to be fat and sloppy or you're going to be big mad that I'm leveling up and looking good and I'm bossed up and successful and educated make up your mind you mad if I'm fat and you're mad when I level up bitch which is it make up your mind you can't be mad at both stupid bitches now you the villain now you the villain but I'm here to tell you drop that load stop caring about what your family has to say about you let them vilify you you have to be okay with being the villain you have to release them with love goodbye bitches y'all are dead to me y'all are gone and dead and don't worry i won't invite you to ---- over here if anything happens to me my family is my friends the lord has blessed me with my spiritual family my friends love me and treat me better than any of my ******* family members my blood relatives i don't i don't want y'all attending nothing when I graduated college all that mattered I've been through two college graduations all that I cared about was my daughter being in that audience and seeing me walk the stage because I'm her role model the rest of them niggas **** out of here I don't need family to support me for nothing you have to be okay with being the villain let them vilify you let them talk their ---- let them say she thinks she all that yeah I am I am bitch you know how long it took me to rebuild my confidence you know how long it took me to build up my self-esteem after you bitches shattered my self-esteem and talked about me like a dog and how fat I am and how you know I can't keep a man you know how long it took me to get my life together and now that I'm on top you bitches still have a problem she thinks she all that look at her **** you bitch I do I absolutely 100% think I'm all that in a bag of chips now what the **** now what and did I absolutely am all of that in a bag of chips bitch my self-esteem is so motherfucking high what you gonna do to knock it down not a damn thing but sit there and cyber stalk me and hate on me and lurk you ******* monitoring spirit all over my page won't like ---- won't support ---- but you can't stop ******* watching me you evil demonic monitoring spirit I curse you bitch I rebuke you in the name of Jesus move on oh I forgot you can't because the plan was to destroy me and it didn't work now you don't know how to reach me now you can't contact me now you don't know how to reach me because you're scared of me you know I'll **** your ass up you're either gonna go to jail ******* with me or I'm gonna knock you the **** out bitch so now you can't even ******* get close to me you can't even have a conversation with me because I'm standing on motherfucking boundaries and you know I don't care that you have a ******* negative opinion about me I don't give a **** what you think about me call me fat miserable uh unattractive can't keep a man bitch I don't care about your opinion your opinion don't pay my motherfucking bills i'm above the smear campaign and over time let me tell you before i wrap up this video the beauty about time you stay silent and you allow time to reveal the real abusers in the scenario and you allow god to handle your enemies god has away see the revenge is so much sweeter when you let god god will kick their asses honey stay silent and sit back and just watch how over time god will **** their asses up and it's gonna be to a point where they tried to apologize and you're not even gonna want the apology i don't want no ******* apology i want you to leave me the **** alone bitch you're dead to me everything that was meant to destroy you is going to be what blows you up what was meant to destroy you God's going to use to elevate you and he's going to make sure they all sit there and watch you got to be okay with being being the villain in their story because you being the villain in their story has nothing to do with the newfound peace you're going to have all this peace and quiet and tranquility you're going to be able to enjoy going to therapy and getting your mind right and and getting your life in order and your finances you're going to be in the gym working out and and getting your body together you're going to be taking vacations you're going to live a peaceful ******* life for you to cut these toxic bitches off and all they can do is sit up and run a nasty smear campaign and vilify you you've got to release it you've got to be okay with being the villain because they're a bunch of clowns in your story they're a bunch of abusers and clowns when it comes to your story let them say what they want to say it doesn't mean that it's the truth and over time God's gonna God's gonna expose all of them each and every one of them got their karma coming individually God's gonna deal with each of them okay I love you guys enjoy your holidays been the spiritual whistleblower