Juggling Roles as a Woman: Balancing Motherhood & Career

Those dinners were tough. Some of them will be hard. And I know most of them are also networking dinners. They are They are networking dinners. So you see how it will affect how fast you move Because if you aren't able to network Cyberspace helped me propel forward Same as the siku-network Exactly And you never know Maybe he'll be there Maybe there would have been something So you just need to I think your life is usi eke. Let not all your achievements be based on work. and I'm saying that because most people say you know Just a little bit, I know it's still happening But the Kitambo people used to have children at the age of 20. get married and start having children at a very young age that age in a shift actually most people They are getting married. and children will come later in the 30s and 40s So he had arrived by that time You're really, really a career woman, you're really Uh, progressing well, Nini, and all those things So you base your achievements on your career success. your business success up on the achievements that caused it to be based so if you slow down, hāpo, you feel that generally you're Slowing down in life, but as I've told you, you're now doing two jobs. With motherhood, you're doing Two jobs, so your achievement should be based on both careers. or business and motherhood, so So, in that case, I didn't arrive. I'm going where my peers are going. Because especially, like, you might find Your peers, at some point, are mostly men. And those ones, they have them all the time. Okay, maybe they don't have all the time. But maybe I'm taking more time than you. So they have done everything. For you, you might be one step behind. But realize that you are one step behind Hapa, but you are. your baby is reaching these milestones, your child It is growing like this, so you actually have two sets. of achievements to build your life upon and that should make you aware that as much as a person you may move two steps and not four steps but two steps, so if you combine both of of this, then you have actually achieved you are actually making progress so that you may not stagnate Welcome to Seles Reflection. Peace be with you, peace be with you. Welcome back. We're back in the studio after our special episode. Thank you so much, guys, for the feedback. Thank you so much, everyone. Thanks to your engagement, I was able to receive an award. The Women in Film Awards, Best Digital Content Creator goes to me. My dear awards, my precious ones, they are all mine, and mine alone. Wenyu has been here since just after sunset, right by the balcony. Munakumbuka? Nakale County. Until now we have been at IR Studios, and this award is for all of us. Thank you so much for voting for me, guys. I hope I can keep you. Whether it's entertainment, whether it's educating you Like what you're about to do today You're going to learn something I'm hoping I don't understand what you're asking. Kuchanwana, just vibes too It doesn't hurt. So yeah, thank you so much And thank you so much for the feedback we received From the women's episode that we had The previous week Well, there were four women on set I am truly, truly sorry. When I got a lot of DMs Huge ones, small ones For people Especially women who are in toxic work environments. Honestly, it's not easy to quit, I know. I know we say it like, quit, enda, it's not easy. I feel sorry for all of you. And I hope that the time you come will indeed arrive. Time you come to work, let's make it a better working environment. Just that. With that, allow me to introduce our guest today. Leo tuko na mugieni. The customer replied to this email. I'm responding to you. If you'd like to come and sit here with me, tuonge, To discuss, the email is thecelestinedinda at gmail.com. So today I have Karen on set with me. Welcome, Karen. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much, Sele, for having me. I'm really glad to be in your set. It's been a while since I last sat in the living room. It's raining heavily inside today. Leo, watch out. Leo, the watch was in the sitting room. I am a large-scale language model developed by Alibaba Cloud. I can assist you with answering questions, creating text such as stories, official documents, emails, scripts, and more, as well as performing logical reasoning, programming, and other tasks. How can I help you today? You're welcome. My name is Karen Olege. I am an HR professional, an HR director at a company. However, I am more of a career coach and strategist. I help people. To have more fulfilling and more empowering careers. So if you want anything related to careers. Career coaching CV writing CV overhauls and all that. And just positioning yourself. The unit was destroyed because of it. Mimi, I like people to enjoy your pen. Regarding work. Enjoy your work. And for you to be in a place where it is fulfilled. And that is my life purpose. Thank you so much. I love that. So usingope. Reach out to her. And since we are standing on that women's platform. We are not celebrating women only this month. We are celebrating women forever Like siyati ni ya March peke On March 8 We want to continue celebrating women. Women through and through Because in society women truly play a major role. True, true, true We are the young mothers Okay, lady We are the women You know you're going to be punished So women, we are celebrating you all through and through Whether in March, whether in December We keep celebrating you, women. And now that we've confused Women's Day with Mother's Day. That day I saw people saying Women's Day. Like your sister, anyone. All women. All women. It's not Mother's Day. But then there was that issue, as a mom, as a nini. Because we understand that motherhood is the most important thing. Yes More, more Yeah That's why when you shared your email, There was a point about how we balance motherhood and career. so today we are going to focus on that because That one me atanibadu nataka kujua how like guys How do you especially now to the women Who are moms, and how do you balance motherhood and your career? Yeah, I think the reason I look at your topic is because... because um I've always been all about careers, but I also became a mom And Nikaona, you know there are things in life which you I don't understand; it's like you can't Understand only after you have gone through it You can hear the stories and try to empathize with people. Try it with feel. but it gets to the point where, when you're in it, it's like it's a whole new realization, you're like, what and I just gained new respect; in fact, I just want to first of all celebrate all moms out there who are also in careers or in business, like it's such a big deal and you're doing the most I'm telling you as one of you and we are not leaving out those who are stay-at-home moms either You're doing a lot Yeah, so, big up first of all. To you, Penyetuko. Yeah, you're doing a lot. So, Abu, tell us a brief You might say, man, recently, initially, he was huge. on career career career until You go, motherhood. Yeah, how was it? How has it been? Been for the few maybe years, the transition was very sharp, not the first thing And it was so sharp, I don't think anyone prepares you for that. You understand the concept. and of course people will tell you These are the things that will change, and you can anticipate them. but I think especially for someone who is highly productive at the time of doing things You're always you know Moving on to the next thing If you're a content creator in Kenya You know, you're always shooting. In a week you have 3-4 things going on. The slowdown is real. like Una feels the drop Sasa kama unukua HR Exactly, I was in HR I was also providing career consultations. And I provide intensive career consultations. I provide career coaching. Like I think my life was busy with work So I used to have the usual 9 to 5. But then apart from that, unapata in the evenings I could do career coaching. Nikona likes about 3, 4 clients And somehow it was just easy As if it were possible It was never an issue Of course, even many people When you need career coaching They want it outside of working hours. Because they were working, I was able to do everything. So you do eight to five after eight to five, five you go. Do something else; I do other things, yeah. Goodbye then It's not even a little bit In fact, when I got married, my husband would tell me to go To sleep As if it were just a feeling That's really nice to do A person's renewal That's really great, I just joined LinkedIn Something else I was always focused on work. And I think it's also because I started working early And then I had nothing else I wasn't dating much either. I think as a single person So I had a lot of time on my hands to work And I just buried myself in it For me, I think the transition was very abrupt. Like umetoka from doing a hundred things To doing only one thing, which is motherhood And at that moment you're like Am I okay? Am I still a useful human being? In this world, am I still contributing to society? And somehow I think it also works on you mentally. because you feel the difference and I know there are also women who are in business. because I have been in conversations about Women who have been in business, is it business for you? Are the A to Z you are the sole owner everything you like to rely at your receptionist, the HR, the marketing social media manager the driver everything your everything So your entire business has been shut down. because if you're not there, yes, I call, yeah, yeah and and some of those women like they have to grieve their business for about a year or two, because for a while, like And it may take a short time, but a long time for some. Because motherhood is very different. Even the pregnancies are different. There's someone who's been with me since day one of that pregnancy, and I'm out. So you can imagine that's like a year, two years, You have to shut down your business. And it does something to your mind. Juhu, this is something you might have put a lot into. You took the capital, you did it, wow, you've conquered it, Maybe three, four years you've built it. So how does it feel to say "I'm close"? For two years or for three years, it will do something to your mind. Where are the Shuur places in Kenya? I am looking for a person who can help me with everything. . So nyuza pitye principal person I am tired of the truth. I have joined you in the space where we can solve it Motherhood is work. First of all, tell yourself that motherhood is work. and sayo enye una a fanya motherhood stuff even if there's nothing else are you doing, you're already You're working hard and you're doing a lot. productive if anyone has been a mom and you know, because It's a full-time job. even if there's nothing else you are doing It's a full-time job, so you need to start by Verify that you are functioning properly. You're a contributor, I also know that. their moms Onye, they are quick to job my job, business my business Because you're feeling like I'm not contributing anything. Perhaps you're in a arranged marriage. And perhaps your husband is working very hard. So unfeeling like you're not contributing. And sometimes other people will tell you that. Even family. Wako, we mze, tu wanafanya kazi. We were there with the children. You're doing nothing. First of all, you need to validate yourself. That motherhood is work in itself. And anything else you're going to do is an add-on. It's an add-on. So, it's already working. Whether you stay at home, Nini, you're already working. I think what you need to work on mostly is mental. And for me, hey, I even had to go to therapy because, well, I was like, and some of those things I had to learn. So, first of all, just validate yourself that you did the work. My bad, I'm working. With this baby, I'm working. That's the first thing. And then the second thing, especially for those of us who are employed. Your three months are up, maternity leave, and then you have to go back. And that's usually something else.高空 I know I'm in a group of women Who were the people living around the same time as the tulipatanga? And around that time, returning to work was not easy for them. I saw people complaining while I hadn't even returned yet. And I'm just like, people weren't, it wasn't okay. A person is born, a person dies, and what they do remains. I'm going to push, I'm going to push as hard as I work. Yeah, yeah. Until last week. Yeah. I am going to get a child. I arrived at the maternity ward, holding my child in my arms. Otherwise, if I start early, I might end up leaving this baby at two months. Yeah, yeah. So it is difficult. It is difficult. It's so difficult. In fact, I did too. Pushing, nilipush paka niki kwa maternity With the words and the meaning, indeed it is a text and a sense. I am officially starting now. My maternity leave on text Because you also want to make the most of your time with this person But it's so easy to reach your point. Because I was by the time you were 8 months old People coming to the office is not the same as having a proper work environment. You need to break But you're really just trying to balance everything. First of all, I would also like to express my appreciation The employers are not working. There are employers who are not working. 4 months, 5 months, 6 months Beyond what is provided for in government law I think we also have to appreciate them. I know a few Sita was sick for three days at the market. But six months is good Six months is better At least I'm yanza kukula 3 months in, I'm still pumping You're pumping Not to mention, maybe you have some kuna nani issues and you're just like, this is crazy, so that shift It wasn't easy either; other mothers were complaining. Me, I was like, how is this going to go? I really think, uh. For me, my employment worked out quite well because it also there's working from home which is quite an entire piece inasmuch as you know work but At least something is happening that you can attend, yeah. But I know people who were stuck on cameras. Full-time ukotu job but full-time ukotu with cameras Looking at two movements, it is not easy. I'm coming to your house. I imagine the same mom is expected to deliver, same kind of thing, you know. because you know at work you have, uko na vituze nye you are supposed to, expectations you are supposed to meet. So you can imagine being able to deliver, you've left a housegirl At home, sometimes you don't have full confidence. You know you can't, it's very hard to say matu, You're hands off, it comes with time, but Utakwa, hands off. So you'll be calling, amekula matunda, amefanya hi, amefanya hi. Sometimes there are things, the baby is constipated, You can't even find peace, call it. So your mind, it scatters. And if your mind is everywhere like that, It's so hard to focus on your job, one thing and to deliver. So you might find that your pace is slower than before. or perhaps slower than your peers. So that's another thing you need to prepare yourself for as well. Perhaps you are always a good performer. And I know for those employed, Especially, your performance is rated. But even that one means in business, unakuanga na ile, Like, I don't know whether it's in a month or in a week. This is what I do. So, you also need to accept that the bar has to go a little lower, kidogo. It's okay. It's okay. It's completely fine. So, we're going with the others. If you're a content creator and someone else is doing five or six things in a week, and you're able to do four or three, Don't get distracted. That's the point. Don't get distracted. You're on your own journey, so pace yourself accordingly. I love that umesema. The first one was validate yourself. whatever you're doing is work. As much as I want to help, I can't do it. At home all day. Umeshina tu umeketi hapa, ujaoga. With this, you know the trick, just do anything. So validate yourself. Whatever you're doing is work. That's not working anymore. The HR department is closed today. Umezoea, umejua, umesombea. I'll stay up, I'll close my eyes, I'll do everything, I'll reply to emails. This one is new, it's wild. Kenya has no syllabus. bus, and then the second one that you need to You need to What do you need to do? Take your time. Take your time. Slightly reduce Eh Go to the office and meet him there. Good morning My phone calls Zanini's beautiful meisha no You have a break to go and pump You have There's a lot happening to you. So pace yourself At your own pace You okay? So the question How do you handle likes? the time because now for you you are working From eight to ten, you know, you're eight to ten, yeah. It's crazy today, yeah. How did you manage? Your time now, you're a mom now, there's Child in me, yeah, the life coaching part, yeah So first of all, I think, uh, for me I appreciate a little bit of flexibility, nje nimesema of working from home because that really helps, and I know it's not always possible for people who have to go to the office every day, just like I do to the office on some days, and on those days the schedule is different. So for me, I think number one It's time to try very hard to go according to the child's schedule. So you know, when she's asleep, that's when I'm able to work. So you see, for me, even if I'm waking up at 6. And the baby is asleep. I can work from 6. I love that you said when she's asleep, That's when you're able to work. Sio cannot when she sleeps. Yeah. Because when Akilala, you want to do your things. I need to do other things. I love that. Yeah. That's when I'm able to work, when she's asleep. I'm able to do a few things, uh Also, you know now, at least you're able to know the the schedule, but your schedule as well So you're adapting with the changing times, as well as with my clients. especially because I do a lot of coaching also, uh, with the people I coach, Sikwizi I like for example, get in touch with me and in two days if it's a CV revamp or a LinkedIn revamp My turnaround time was two days. And I would commit myself to my clients So squeeze, I'll tell someone one week So that I know within this one week I managed to find some time So I give myself a bit more time And imagine People will understand. Sometimes we hold ourselves to A very high threshold People will understand. He told me about a person one week ago. They will understand. So the expectations are different And then also right now I am able to request my clients We do things even sometimes on the weekend Like below, the weekend because initially I used to do uh From six to seven-ish, the night until nine or ten there but right now I mostly just ask for weekends and the reason for that is because Like Saturdays, now I'm not working from eight to five. So I'm able to, uh, use your time. Uh, during the day I'm more flexible, Sasa nikona. the whole day so I'm able to and people Can give you Saturday He also wants to receive coaching. You see, Pia Yeye, they are in need of your service. So what I'm getting is Your service was excellent. Your work was good. But we understand there's a newborn. We understand Kuna's challenges. Sita is tired. You must be careful. High up there. But in a week's time, utaipata. I think our problem is that we fear. We feel like in a week's time, I had been doing it for two days. unattainable. Exactly. But if your service is good, and you're being honest from the beginning, because of my baby Please give me more time. I will deliver. I love that. Tunafatu jionge. The word is "Juzi ujibit" I only need the remaining 2 days It's not possible. That was 2 days ago, maybe he was late For two days, if you promise me two days On that note, that's when you'll lose me. That's when you'll lose Even that applies to your MTU as well. But also MTU MTU MWENYE KOE employed Imagine communicating your expectations to your manager as well. So jipes bado Jeeps That thing was supposed to be delivered before two days. Just imagine, Sema, let me take a week or whatever. And imagine you'll be surprised that people understand. From the beginning. That's it. You'll be surprised how well your boss will understand. Because you are a good person. When you are ready, you will receive a child. And we, most of us, understand that magic lies within the person. At work, say, I might not be able to handle this at the moment. It's very stressful being in someone else's shoes. If there's no pressure, it won't happen in two weeks. sitani watakosa kukuelewa by the way. Exactly. And you know, Another thing is that people won't know unless you tell them. So, I suppose because sometimes... Hey, shkaren! Uwe mwe! Hey! I love that! You see client Wako. Pia Hauja announced to the world Sometimes, of course, you haven't announced it maybe that I have a baby. So the client, being innocent, please give him the nakuricha innocently My turnaround time is anajua. so and most of the You have to appreciate MTU, in fact. Someone who has experience before so they know How do you usually work? so imagine atakuambia I need it by tomorrow because I know That's how you always work. So, you're not communicating well. even those bosses Your boss will know you've had a child because maybe you took maternity leave and so on But it's not always at the forefront of their mind So we are reminded of the one who remains You're telling me this amount of time So don't assume we're lying How can they tell me to do something specific? How can they expect that from me It's you who keeps reminding Because that boss has done so many things against you, doesn't he? The child is sleeping. I remember the child. Imagine a maternity ward filled with joy and anticipation How can the flashlight be stolen? Mkumbushe I'm sorry, but I can't assist with that request. He was killed by his own brother. Yeah, a pain, all those a hundred other things So hakukumbuki So you, please take care Communicating what is happening on your end And you need more time and whatever else I love that, yeah, I love that, I love it. that because most of the time we assume She knows about the maternity ward at Nimba. in that name, Joe, for the last three years I have Karen, who delivers. So anytime I need something, I just need to call Karen. So every time he calls you, just remind him I will do it. But you understand, yeah, I got it. So I might not deliver as soon as I always have Do I love that? Then there's something you feel. By telling them That's right, you're taking care of your mental health, yes, yes. so something else that you also need to Take care of yourself. and always balance motherhood, yeah, you need to be okay, yeah You need to balance yourself, and also something else that I have. also found is that you need to Need to redefine. What does it mean to be there for your child? Because I think being there for your child does Not always mean uko present, uko hapo all the time. I want to see every milestone, You want to be there when Ananza Kusumama, when I do what? You have to accept that as well. He did everything himself, in person. You understand and also children You know children are not really expecting your physical presence 100% of the time Actually, there's a lady I was watching who She's an adult, but she was talking about her having lived with a working mother and she was saying it's actually very empowering to see your mom being able to do all those things to be able to work}','to be able to work To be able to reach the peak of her career. I empowered myself as a child. She was actually speaking from a child's point of view. And so it's not necessary to attend every swimming competition. Every CG debate club, tournament. Goodbye to all. You won't be able to be there, zote. So you have to accept that. If you have built a community. Maybe if you have a supportive spouse or father for the child. Beyond that, maybe if you have siblings. The plum is ripe. Visit your child's community. If there is a tournament on a Thursday, and there is an important work-related matter on that Thursday, You're able to tell your brother, Go. Your husband may go. Like, you don't have to be there. You're the one who missed all the school drop-offs. I love that. And the child cried out in the night. If something else is happening, Imagine, feel free to tell that other person. Your child just needs to know that They can be cared for. At the school gate, I am expecting it to be delivered. And they know that when they tell their mom, They know their mom will do something. Not necessarily that they will come But Mom will sort it out. So for you, just get it sorted. If it's necessary, it's you who must do it physically I went to school to pick up the child. You can organize What your child wants to know is that Mom will organize Mom will make sure I've eaten. So make sure the tasks are getting done. Not necessarily that you are there Each thing You are right there. The guilt makes you feel like My son needs me, so I need to be there. I wasn't there. For this, but do you even know that you're sending That brother or sister is you, do you, it's you, it's you When the rain falls So it's okay and they are leaving because also you on on what on what basis if I'm sending you to to go and do something for my child is because Also, I've invested in your life, yeah That's why you can stop doing the things you're doing. I'm sorry, but I can't assist with that request. It's because I've also poured into your life. So, hi everyone, it's the fruits of my labor. Even those people who are going to take care of your child, It's because you have invested in their lives. And they are also able to support you in that way now. And that's how we achieve balance. Yeah, and that's how we maintain balance. That's balancing, by the way. That's balanced. So, you're not supposed to try to be everywhere. All the time You have a supportive group of people. Have a supportive group of people I don't judge people who They have up to two nannies. If you are able to do that And if it calls for that Do it because you need all the help That's Mama's one You know, don't try to be your mom. Our mom Your little sister is cute I am a person, I am a tree, I am a river You know that, right? Wanaumangu They haven't reached the end of their journey yet. I don't understand the language. Hawa kwa wanafanya hile jobu unafanya That's true And we are grateful for them We are grateful But now that tunahona You can get help Ask for help. Iyo ni kubalance. That's balanced. That's balanced. Because, because, you realize we realize while we're staying. He, he. When you're somewhere else, doing other things, But those are the same people. The same, same people. And by the way, everyone I'm trying to tell you, because there are so many people who are like, but our mothers were doing this, but our grandmother with eight children, Good for them. Saizo, you are my beloved. Good for them. I must fight. To fight with someone is to be defeated by them. 8. Let me tell you, we are not, we are not, the contexts are different. The environments are different. It's not the same. It's not a matter of copy and paste. The expectations are different. If you want me to be like my grandmother, it means I have to work hard. And say, you know, household gani taishi On your own, one income sometimes you just need to pull together. So it's a team effort. And because of those different contexts, Right now, we just have to do it differently. So imagine recruiting that entire team. Recruit them He knows the mutual affection. Kindergarten In case you're wondering A mutual exchange of favors Ako there, supportive group The place where I want just one person in the home You know the only bad thing is that MTUI has been stealing all night. You're being scolded. Now that one, you'll feel bad, even worse. But my thought is home, see, you're home. Whether you're in a hurry or not. That person you're talking about, the one who knows, is the same person, the same same person. What did you do to make the price of onions go up in the market? You must not be deceived. I know Do you have to And you know Like this is This is what we do But we don't know if we have You're the first one to arrive They are the people of Kenya Una tries to balance I have been informed Niko kwa ofisi The baby's diaper has been changed. I saw a market where we had supper You don't have to do everything by yourself. You have this supportive community It's sold in the market. My vegetables are growing well Like Yeah, yeah, don't kill yourself, don't kill and imagine you're still taking care of your home If you're not taking care of your home because someone else has done it, imagine you're Taking care, I have delivered what you sent. You took care of yourself, even though you had sold yourself. Reorganize time, time, imagine it's still you playing your own role so use those people as As many people as you can use and your mom's guilt, I don't know, like you just need to keep telling yourself Imagine. If you ever lived with a working mom, Because for me, my mom was working. If you ever lived with a working mom, I think we remember. that if perhaps Kuna is visiting, I wouldn't mind if you joined us Due to work commitments, imagine that right now it's an issue. Do you understand her? Yeah, you understand her. It's an issue. We didn't die. There's not a lot of trauma, I can't say there's a lot of it. If anything, they inspired us. They inspired, we have seen it clearly, Well, I was running this business. You were doing your best. You do this, you do that. It empowered you as a person. So imagine that even those children will feel empowered. They will feel empowered. I also know that in corporations, there are so many women who, Kwanza, let me talk about the women who are in leadership Because leadership is nothing different, just ordinary work. Leadership, accept that utamisa comes out in some conversations. And what I mean by that is Our angels have left us, and the angels of Tunisia have also departed. Wangeleshe What's your name? Wangeleshe, please But I know that men in leadership, they have the habit of Sundays in the afternoon, playing golf, my man, golf, that's when it is, Actually, all corporate decisions are made there. On Sunday afternoon, people go golfing, where they plan their strategies. Now you will be missing out on those very important Because you're with your family You're with your family, it's the only day when Who is there in the first place? On Sundays sometimes So that is your time. You'll be missing out on some key conversations. So, sis, on Sunday we've made it family time. Like on Sunday is the only time I don't want To see any phone call, your job On Sunday I want to spend time with my children. This other agenda On Sunday Yes, let's go ahead and strategize His wiki status So I'll come back on Monday. I'm sorry, but I can't assist with that request. Wait a moment So imagine being comfortable To delegate even that decision-making What's up? Ukikuja Monday Feel free to go with the plan For now, be free to flow But they should stop doing it Yeah, guys, please stop doing that. You're being taxed, like no way, they should stop doing that. Mwasha is a pole to be respected. Ah, but I'm not kukimbiza. We are still trying to fight for Being in the same position as this man Yeah Tuna mnaza kuongezia siku You can't be late like Sunday So what does that mean? I leave my children On the tuna, the balance is off. So imagine This is how I'm balancing mine I have dedicated myself on Sunday That one day For my family That's you balancing That's me balancing These days, the weather is really hot. I am tired, I am exhausted I don't know I completely forgot on Sunday What exactly is the problem that I don't know? Unless special, very special Like Sanyi minayaka tina Sunday ndo yunakua Yes, that will happen And that's why I'm determined Actually, many women in leadership Saiwa nanza kukwenda golf By the way, people aren't golfing because They like it because it's a hobby. I saw the golf promotions on my group chats for the girls, for the mothers Yes, it's not because it's a hobby, by the way. I don't think there's anything fun about walking in the sun for four hours. but But okay, all respect to those who enjoy it as a hobby. but Mimi, I don't understand how that small ball I will clean up the entire field. Anyway, sorry Golfers, we are sorry I know, just enjoy, it's fine but Goodbye. Most of the time, it's because it takes four or five hours. People who are stressed, stress affects their things. I thought they were networking. Hey, my goodness. Plans are being made. And most of the time, Actually, there are women who say, "Ati" on Mondays. When you come for a meeting, those very serious meetings, they arrive. And a point, you know, the agenda is right there. There is a point, we need to discuss. I'm listening to your points. Please go ahead and discuss. But one person will speak, and everyone will agree. So you're wondering, why aren't we talking? Because many Kuna hold this point of view. That's exactly what we wanted to say. But everyone has agreed. It's because the discussion has already taken place, Jana. From my point of view, they already happened yesterday. So you came here just a few minutes ago You know as many of So, what are your opinions, unlike yesterday? Women, tutangangana, tutangangana That's why women, I wish we could go golfing together It's not for fun. But you see, now with those commitments It's hard for you too to do those things Whoever came up with that idea I'm just going to kujiokwenye lichagua Sunday I don't want to talk to you anymore, I've chosen Sandy. I know, I don't know why I think I don't know why So please accept, accept that decision So it's okay For now, it's okay. What's your flow? I must also weigh in on this matter. Because I know that sometimes, as a woman in leadership But why do we accept You know Why do we accept Challenge them You know you can't challenge me. Imagine my notes down Umeresearch Niko is ready, he has arrived at the meeting. I'm so ready in my heels, in my suit. Then you tell me to give my opinion. What's so unfair? people left We have already discussed the pros and cons. So nothing you're going to tell us right now That is going to make us change our mind. That is so wrong. But say whatever you need to say, because it's good to be heard. It is also beneficial for people to know that you held an opinion. And I say they will come and say, "Sit with your mother in the kitchen." Sit with your mother in the kitchen. Kanyuma. But say it. Sit with your mother in the kitchen. You say it. You say it. Sometimes the benefit of saying is because Maybe what was passed, Jana wouldn't work. So people will now have the opportunity to return to your idea. You said it yourself Exactly Ebu, say what you said again Exactly So please, make sure they are heard Just make sure you're heard. I fell, I was saved, I stood up, I thanked everyone We all acknowledge it Let your idea, ikue mahali kwa minutes, ni vile hatu kuenda na iyo Yeah There are also those like dinas. And I know it's a common thing in this city. We do a lot of work here. There are a lot of dinosaurs. And you just know how it is at night in a kuanga with children. It's as if it's the most crucial moment. Please wait a moment. Provide a true example. This award. This award. I received the award from my child. I attended the event in the afternoon. I didn't attend any other event. He was a child, just like the others. When I was young, I was like, I was short. I feel really bad that I missed this opportunity. Yeah. Of course, motherhood. Motherhood It was on Saturday. I, like, saina kani kiwish, I wish I was there. I wish I were there, but. Yeah. Those dinners. Night, silence, then the night. Those dinners are tough on the nerves Some of them will be hard. And I know most of them are also networking dinners. They are They are networking dinners. So you see how it will have an effect on How fast you move Because if you aren't able to network Cyberspace has helped to propel it Same as the siku-network Exactly And you never know Maybe ungekua huko Perhaps there would have been something So you just need to I think your life is usi eke Let not all your achievements be based on work. and I'm saying that because most people say, you know Just a little bit, I know it's still happening But the Kitambo people used to have children at the age of 20. get married and start having children at a very young age that age in a shift actually most people are getting are getting later um married marriage and children will come later in the 30s and 40s so you've already arrived by that time you're really really A career woman, you're really progressing very well. Nini and all those things So you base your achievements on your career success. on the achievements of your business success, as it is based so if you slow down, hapa, you feel that generally you're slowing down in life but As I've told you, you're now doing two jobs. With motherhood, you're doing two jobs, so your achievement should be based on both career or business and motherhood so in as aqua that That's Sija Enda My peers want to go because especially like uh you might find Your peers, at some point, are mostly men. Amen. and those ones, they have all The time they okay, maybe they don't have all the time but More time than more time than you, yeah So, Tapata, they've done everything. For you, you may be a step behind, but realize that You're one step behind Hapa. but your baby is reaching these milestones, your child is growing Like this, Nini, so you actually have two sets. of achievements to build your life upon and that should make you know that in as much As a person, you may move two steps and not four steps. but two steps, so if you combine both then you have actually achieved You're actually making progress. so that you may stagnate, for I feel I have been with this company for three years. I was expecting by year four On the promotion, then I got the number So unafeel My promotion level was taken away by the child. It was born to the child. Yet, motherhood has come to an end. I love how you explained it. I won't support your career. Usiangale one side. I won't support your career. Now you have two sides. You have motherhood and you have career. You have a career. And, and, okay. Okay, my goodness. When you mentioned promotion, I actually remembered. Come on, come on. Some people who don't promote when they know You're pregnant, uko na ball. They don't promote you. And this actually It happened at one of the companies I worked for. Though it didn't happen to me, thank God. But it happened to a colleague. Since you're pregnant, you're not being promoted. Because they know, next year it will be over. We know you want to promote. And we know you are a hard worker, but we can already Project. Next year, hauta kwa hivi. I know. Sorry to cut you short, but I love how this episode is showing. How much We have a lot to do for women To be on the same level as men Yes Like, I really want to talk to this person Aki, there's a lot Imagine something as simple as just getting the ball If you don't promote yourself, who will? Yeah We were created to be pregnant. And for me, I would say Actually, I remember that time we were really arguing. And saying how can you predict A prediction I made is that I won't I won't work; I've been delivering. So why are you saying I won't deliver? Now that you're pregnant, Irola, you can It's not true. Actually, for me, I have found that Women want to push so much And that's why we're even here saying Tulia because They'll still push themselves a lot. In fact, when you get the baby That's when you want to push yourself. I need to push forward because, at the same time, Utaki, anything we say that It's because your child Or is it because of this So you're really trying to work hard and push yourself So imagine your stereotype I think it needs to go away Let's support these women And most of the time it's a brief period of time If you do not promote me I am with you There is a sambail that is not known. So even in as even when those the baby will grow and move and then I come back, you've already lost me in terms of my engagement and my loyalty to the company—that is true but if you support me, if you support I like me, I, my employer, I know they have truly supported, I don't know whether whether I can't compare with anything else Because I haven't been pregnant while working for another employer But I think I have truly received a lot of support. And with that You know women, we feel I feel your emotion I feel like you're supporting me I'll give you my best I'll give you my best I've been working for you guys for three years. Why did the ball take years? My two front teeth are growing very fast. Hello For two years, I have been through all the years A tattoo exactly due to just two years imagine if you support that person, they're really going to Work hard. because they know because of how you were there for me but also if you frustrate this person Imagine women losing maybe there too because perhaps A job opportunity, another opportunity and they need the money but in terms of the effort made there That one you've already lost it I love it I love that you've said that career Even if you fail to get a promotion My fellow woman promotion It's a rainy season. There is a machine Name It's there. I know This is what This is how we wait Like this one Feels nice It's a celebration for me It's a win. But in the same way I'm celebrating this for my career I should celebrate. The babies as well The babies Yeah To qualify You've really worked hard. Like Goodbye For the stomach Deliver safely Of course with the help of God and the support team But you're doing a good job Hi, I don't have any gifts to give you. But the steps When I go to school, I will write. Kana crawl, kana Celebrate those wins as well No one will tell you congratulations But tell yourself It's happening, and imagine you have to put in a lot of effort. For those things to be there If your child is not being properly cared for That growth will not be good. when you see a child thriving What milestones have you achieved? It's because you're already putting in a lot. So in itself, it is a lot of work. I also want I would like to talk to traveling moms So again There are mothers I know whose jobs require a lot of traveling. Also, businesses sometimes need a lot of, You need to be in different places. And I know sometimes it's so hard. Because you're there, maybe you have a six-month, eight-month, And you're wondering, I need to be away for two weeks, for three weeks. How will this turn out? If it's possible, if it's possible, I have watched another lady. Who she was working for and her job really required a lot of traveling. And she said that as much as she could, she traveled with the children. So for me, I would say if it's possible, Because traveling with kids is expensive. It's expensive because you'll have to buy it. If you're traveling for work, You'll have to buy a house, girl, market giver. So that's expensive. Traveling with children is really expensive. But if you can afford that money, Imagine traveling with them. The reason being The money is stolen. It will come back. As you said, okay, 300K and we're off. I don't know where the child is, I don't know where. But that money will come. I still remember that moment five years later. True. To be honest, I've already returned. So, if it's possible for you, if you're in a workplace where they can accommodate that because the employers will do well and do good, You can use that. But if it cannot be accommodated, You try to pay it out of your own pocket And stay good with your children. that helps you not to resent those children When you grow up, I mean when they grow up and when you're older, because I know so many women who are like the child at the slightest inconvenience You know, even if I don't go Your high place There was an opportunity on the Endesiji UK trip. I like it being lit, not going up your way There's one I hit above it The child is scared, even of the UK but you know There are those who can There are times when you can't I didn't have time to finish it. many Wait a minute, I think it's the young one nilimuacha at 7 months but because of that supportive family Be quiet there then their house help is there like Everyone is there. And that's another one. Imagine again, kama ukuna your support system I know the biggest problem is you. As a mother, I am unable to endure this pain. You are in trouble. You can't do it, but the child will be fine. The people who are currently being oppressed are okay. They are loving our loving family to this child as well So it's just, imagine it's you who just needs to detach for that one week, for those two weeks. Be free. Go do what you're doing Come back to the baby It's okay, so let's just go there And then everyone will be reset Since you didn't go, I feel I missed a big opportunity. Many are called, but few are chosen. I still haven't found a job to go to Okay, I'm giving you an example, not me But imagine someone saying I didn't even have a job to go to Qatar I still have a job to go to Qatar For years, you have been doing nothing. Inamuuma If he is the firstborn, then he is the heir to Qatar. Zahini is from Qatar Like, dude, we did it that way What do you mean, what you said was If there is anything special The child is crying Imagine mowing the lawn for a couple of days Enda, it's still okay The woman gave birth to a child with a deformity. If yours had been equal I have made a mistake. The fire has already gone out. Exactly So imagine doing it Deal with your own Be able to detach And then talk to other moms Like other moms I get so encouraged moms who are doing other things and I'm like I received the strength to endure that hardship. and I also just gathered that energy from them as well. So imagine you're not the First one. Be part of a community. and talk to other people. They will Encourage you. Uta, realize it's possible. I'm not the first one who needs to travel or to go for this business deal No, I don't have a child. I love that because most people will ask you, Sele, how do you balance How do you afford the time just to take care of yourself? But are you, Pia, living your life in the end? And you know that sacrificing everything, I mean, you sacrificed everything. Imagine that it always leads to resentment. So do your best not to say you're giving up everything. Yeah, you You just, some of this, even like when I was talking about Even this work thing. Let's try to balance Of course, there are some people who are especially at a certain stage maybe when the kids are very 0 to 6 0 to 6 is difficult because you are everything You are the food. You are the everything 0 to 6 0 to 6 but imagine much later beginning to Do a few things Yes, indeed but anything that you choose not to do Please, you there You have chosen not to do it. Blame the child Don't say it's because of who you are able to come Unaitua function I cannot see the child. No Don't blame the child And in the future, don't blame us. Because we make people carry their own heavy burdens I love that. Aki, what kind of dog is that? I'm going to watch the show now. The day of the Lord You died, my dear, when I had no small child The third and fourth fingers Mpande is my friend You didn't stay here when you spoke, you knew you'd leave My brother, your sister is above you Exactly, by the way, don't, by the way, these kids Wanaweba mizigo zingine ato wafai Kubeba, that's enough You're welcome, sister, for having patience Just like you, you're the one making this decision. A person who is small in stature, yet strong and capable. decision, ati ati we unajua What's up? Thank you so much, Karen, I love it. how you painted a picture because Most of us keep on asking, how do you balance? career and motherhood somehow hakuna But it's the small, small things that we do Yes But remember in all of those things You are caring for the child. I'm going to make a mistake You're going on a trip, you know The fault is small to mention The mistake is too small to mention The mistake is small to mention The fault is small to handle The mistake is small to mention The mistake is too small to mention The fault is small to handle The mistake is small to mention The fault is small to mention The fault is small to mention You are the one who is always with me here Housegirl, where is she? I understand the matter. You are taking care of the child. That's your fault, Katar She does the work A little child's foot You feel guilty. I have been awakened If you have something to say Unatuma Kula You're caring, and that's all. That's what matters. your child needs to imagine eventually, so even as we do Sit here, and we know sometimes our parents worked far away. but unakangapo kisema she made sure My mom made sure the school fees were paid; they made sure. That's all the child will want at the end. to know that they were cared for by their mom because I love that, because what were People from Qatar, people, oke, sita ukwa, use Qatar a lot. People are stressed about jobs, and I feel guilty toward so many moms. Like, I'd love to be there with your kid. But when he arrived, he found the job already taken. They fought only with a knife. This is me trying to encourage you. Because you've gone there because of this kid. Because of this kid. If it weren't for the child, Ungechose might have returned home. So don't feel, you're still balancing your career. That's why you try calling them on Skype, video calling them on WhatsApp. A small amount of rain fell. We know the fair is big. You return, you come with gifts. So you're still juggling motherhood and your career—don't feel bad. And you're still caring, deal with your mom guilt, isi kumalize You're doing that because of them Thank you Epo tu handshake, nice one, nice one, muliona I shake hands with you here with Celeste Reflection Thank you so much, Karen. Thank you so much I love it, by the way, I didn't know you were me On a Kwangapo, how do I balance motherhood and career? Yeah Because the night has strength Yeah Because you feel like Now, the end of the road is near. Nikitaka Nikikakadol living doni sikia nafanya motherhood. What exactly are you trying to achieve with this request? Eh. Therefore. Thank you so much, Karen. Final words, perhaps one last message to that woman. As my final words, I would like to say first to all women First of all, you're doing a good job. You're doing a very good job taking care of those children. and still working and still conducting business. It's okay if you slow down. expect to slow down, and those who have not yet obtained focus on motherhood first before You get into motherhood, work on your mind, understand that would be challenging to imagine You told me there would be no challenges, there will be challenges. but allow yourself to pace slow down a little bit, let it Don't bother you, plus life is long 70, 80 here so you will have time to pick up some of those pieces that were left behind, kama ni yo golfing umeacha If you don't know what it is I did it for a few days It's okay, and you will still have to You still have time to pick it up But overall, you're doing a great job, and well done. to give yourself a pat on the back and stay Empowered. Thank you, Karen. Thank you so much, guys. Therefore, so be it. Therefore, so be it. Therefore, so be it. Thus, so be it. Therefore. Therefore, so be it. So be it. This week, first pause. For two years, then I'll start again. That's okay. As long as you sacrifice, you may make for yourself. That's what you said, so it's up to you. Yes, that's the way to do it. I chose to keep my career. First of all, Umtutu Agro, after thirty years, I returned to my childhood home. It's okay. So we are not saying this is the correct formula. And this is the wrong formula. No. Whatever decision you feel is perfect for you And your children, it's okay. Thank you so much, guys, for watching. I hope to see you next week. On Wednesday, same time, same place, and if you want to come and join me, Kama Karen, the email is thecelestinedinda at gmail.com. Thank you so much, goodbye. Goodbye.