I'm republishing the awful book I wrote when I was 13.

dear 10 year old me i have three things to say to you mel so listen closely first of all please stop wearing colorful shorts you're an embarrassment to humanity number two i impulsively purchased a bicycle yesterday turns out i can't bike nearly as well as i thought i could and i despise you for it i can't stop playing minecraft and go outside or something lastly i know you're currently writing a novel called the sky weeps with us i'm sorry to break it to you but it's going to crash and burn horribly and nearly 300 000 people will witness it because you're going to publicize the failure online you better be grateful now because i spent years fixing the mess that you are about to create after publishing a few other books i'm finally rewriting and republishing the sky weeps with us as a trilogy and at the end of this video i'll be revealing the official cover for book one but first let me tell you why i decided to make your 10 year old dreams come true because with pants like those you definitely don't deserve it when i first started writing the sky weeps with us i was obsessed with dystopian books that were taking over teen and pre-teen society at the time i was determined to write my own book about a broken government system as a 10 year old it did not go well the book i published under the pen name of jane windshield absolutely sucked packages it's been a year-long journey to get a hold of these three packages a couple years after i published it and moped around in shame i came across this video by austin mcconnell where he shared the story behind unpublishing and i decided to do the same i filmed a video called i wrote a book when i was 13. it sucked in it i explained why i decided to unpublish the skyweaves with us although it's no longer my most popular video it was actually the first one on my channel to reach a hundred thousand views and even austin mcconnell the legend himself commented on my video with a leo pointing me i nearly fainted this was the video that led me to start taking both writing and youtube more seriously [Music] i thought that posting this video would finally put the skyweaves with us to rest i could not have been more wrong you should rewrite it and publish it again do you think you would rewrite this book would you ever rewrite the story and publish the story in the future probably not i hope jane windshield makes a comeback to be a stronger writer or at least i hope you rewrite and republish the skyweaves with us being older it deserves a chance yeah i don't see why you hate this book i think all you need is to rewrite it you took the time to write and self-publish at a young age and now that you know better you can revisit it and rewrite it and make it better if you are not satisfied with the book you have already written then please write it again and publish it i will be one of the first to buy it you were just 13 and i have read much worse books and i think you can edit it again or rewrite it i promise i will certainly read the whole book that that's a big promise buddy now you gotta read all three this makes me want to read the book you should rewrite it if you're not happy with it don't just let your idea die would you write this again do all the things that you didn't a lot of people have been asking this you know maybe someday i'll give it a shot but i wasn't actually considering this at the time it was more of a maybe in 10 years kind of thing so i mostly ignored the comments and moved on to publish two novels the first was leaving wishville which takes place in a town where everyone who leaves never returns the second was capsule an emotional sci-fi story about a phone app that threatens to erase two high schoolers capsule's release in particular was overwhelming it had a great launch tons of people read the book but then i found myself feeling more lost than ever i had no clue what to work on next so i did some brainstorming and narrowed down three options the first was to continue a book i worked on for about two years in middle school before abandoning the book was called rant and i already had about 50 000 words completed it was about a correctional boarding school for child stars gone south but when i tried working on it again i didn't feel that same spark and i decided that i abandoned the project for good reason the second option was to write a middle grade fantasy book which is wildly out of my usual style like the opposite of anything i would write but it sounded like a lot of fun the story was about a young boy on a search for a magic persimmon don't ask me why that could bring his older sister back to life i wrote about four chapters lost interest and gave up the last option was a story called cabin five about a summer camp run by very suspicious counselors that pits two teams of teenagers against each other i loved the concept but after writing two chapters i wasn't really feeling a strong connection at this point i was even more stressed about what to work on and for some reason the sky weaves with us wouldn't stop haunting me i was pretty desperate at this point so i sat down and considered what the book would look like if i were to revive it and once i started i couldn't stop i fell in love with the concept all over again and finally accepted the challenge to rewrite the sky weaves with us over the course of two weeks i plotted out a three book outline for what i would call the belladonna trilogy during the month of august 2021 i wrote almost 80 000 words of the first book in the trilogy which i named nightshade academy that was the most i had ever written in a one month period before and just for reference that is the length of the secret garden this book just came so naturally to me and the story was incredibly nostalgic i was on a roll but then i ran into a problem belladonna is my most ambitious writing project yet it has martial arts and poison and politics and a lot of stuff that i just knew very little about at the time i was seriously doubting whether or not i'd be able to pull this rewrite off maybe the sky weeps with us has been and always will be completely out of my league i sent an early draft of nitrate academy to a group of beta readers to gather constructive criticism and a common complaint was that my fight scenes were unrealistic and then that made me think if my fight scenes are unrealistic then surely training in real life would help with that i joined a local muay thai gym and documented my first month of training for a youtube video like i hoped the experience helped me significantly improve the fight scenes in nightshade academy and the concept of tackling more personal challenges to benefit the trilogy excited me i was addicted to a style of writing i had never explored before and thus began the start of my belladonna behind the scenes youtube series i began to seek and document real life experiences with the goal of improving belladonna such as living with monks dual sword fighting training at a kung fu retreat and visiting the most dangerous island in the philippines currently editing that last one through the creation of this youtube series i have not only gained experiences for belladonna but also for myself i've started to wonder am i writing this story or is this story writing me fully immersing myself in this rewrite also inspired me to create a theme song for the belladonna trilogy called what we are which is now available to stream on spotify by the way [Music] a couple weeks ago i even recorded a version of what we are with my own vocals which will be coming soon so keep your eyes peeled and that brings us back to today it's been over a year since i started working on nitrate academy which blows my mind but i feel like now is a perfect time to finally share the cover with you guys so here it is i am absolutely obsessed with how the cover turned out as soon as it was finalized i literally could not stop staring at it for like two weeks the silhouette is yashi kanya the protagonist of book one the building in the back is the guardian academy and the four-pedaled flower represents the academy emblem and is also the logo for the trilogy itself if you've seen my recent videos you probably recognize this flower or if you're crazy like me you probably even see it in places where it doesn't exist look at this it's belladonna this is crazy what the heck do you see what i see belladonna but like squished belladonna i had some character illustrations made recently as well so allow me to introduce you to yoshi kanya velvetura pinto dempsey quaccevarium kia decoy and santi these are the main six characters in the belladonna trilogy and i can't wait for you guys to meet them i gotta say this really quickly because the sun is setting very fast i can't share the official release date with you guys quite yet but just know that i am working really really hard to get this book out as fast as possible without rushing the process and publishing work that i'm not proud of not going to make the same mistake with this story twice as a final note i want to say thank you to everyone who peer pressured me and bullied me of don't believe me i just want to thank everyone who pressured me into rewriting the skyways with us i don't know if i would have done this rewrite if it weren't for all the comments i received on that youtube video that really reminded me of this project in the first place rewriting the skywaves with us has consumed my life in the best possible way it's been amazing to slowly watch this story turn into the book my 10 year old self dreamed it would be but didn't have the skills to tell at the time i'm so excited to share more about nightshade academy and the belladonna trilogy as a whole so please subscribe if you're interested in following the rest of this story and i will see you later maybe hopefully hopefully because i like to see your face i can't see your face oh what am i saying i'm tired i've been working on this video too long goodbye [Music] you