The Most Scared I've Been in Manila

i'm about to sit down and chat with you guys but i'm going to put the christmas tree on first so we have a nice background okay got background got some lighting and we're going to have a little bit of a chat we're going to have a bit of a different video to usual lucy's behind me washing up so if you hear some noise that's what that is but [Music] yeah today's a little bit different but it's a bit of a a bit of an update a bit of a document documentation of some stuff that's been going on which i haven't been talking about in the usual vlogs um and this is kind of to do with health and stuff like that so basically recently i had a very small surgery procedure over in makati which i was not expecting to have at all and for the last couple of weeks it's kind of been if i'm honest totally totally on my mind it's been hard to think about anything else it was it's been hard to fully get into the christmas spirit um i didn't want to mention it on the vlogs because i was still waiting for some test results and stuff like that so let's go back quickly i'm also making this video because i kind of want to put a message out that people should get things checked if they're not sure of something or even if even just routinely if even if they think they are sure of something it's important to look after ourselves look after our bodies look after our health that kind of thing so let me take you back um one year maybe a year and a half year and a half basically i've got a lot of moles on my body i've got like moles on my face on my neck my legs arms i'm very very moldy so much so that my sister used to play count them all when she saw me she said that was another one doctor dot and when we were younger she was like trying to count all the moles on my face anyway since lucy and i have been out this side of the world there's a lot more sun exposure and we were doing a lot of traveling a lot of time at beaches islands out in the sun every single day so i thought about a year and a half ago let's just get routine check check all my moles see if any look dangerous see if any look different i didn't think any had changed but there was a few things i was concerned about so i found an amazing skin doctor dermatologist in makati shout out to cordam and i met her and we chatted through she checked my skin and but not all of it only kind of the ones i pointed out because there was one here which i was thinking might look a little bit different but she wasn't concerned at that point so she said come see me in six months went again in six months same thing luckily totally fine um went away pretty reassured it was then in lockdown when lucy's friend put something on her social media saying um she had a mole and it had changed and she went to get it checked and it actually was a melanoma which is a form of skin cancer and i was like well i totally forgot about my moles thankfully she is all okay she got it removed and she was updating her followers on her social media and stuff so i thought right that's that's a good reminder let's book in an appointment just routine just to check up hopefully everything will be fine and it will just be like the previous appointments that i had so i go there and we we look i've also had two on my head two big moles on my head under my skin under my hair and when she looks at those she goes i think those have chains i think those have got slightly bigger because she remembered them from before she said i'd like to remove them said i don't think they're dangerous but if you want we can remove them and i was like kind of like okay i've wanted these gone actually for like years now whenever i brush my hair whenever i get a haircut the barber always catches them it's just annoying so i thought okay let's definitely get those two and whilst i was there she actually decided to check the rest of my body and have a closer look at all the moles on my body so she identified a few that looked a little bit different and a little bit strange so there's one in particular that she's concerned about so at that point i'm kind of like oh dear i've never been told that before you've always had a look and you've said looks fine looks fine it's fine so as soon as she said that my heart sort of dropped a little bit and i don't know you start thinking the worst you start thinking about things and she said i actually want to remove that and send it off for a biopsy straight away and i was like okay cool um when can we do this like let me know when you've got time she said today i'll put in some clips here didn't film much but i did film a little bit okay i'm robed up and luckily lucy did a little coffee run so i have a coffee and had some food as well and they basically put anesthetic on some of the moles the two on my head and two on my one let's go wider one kind of round here and one kind of round here and we're getting them biopsied and removed today which i didn't expect i just came in for a checkup like um i like to do a yearly check and i didn't expect to actually be doing anything today so this is a little bit um didn't have much time to mentally prepare for this but there we go it's a good thing to get it done so this is me kind of like in the gown suddenly so at this point i thought i was just going for a routine appointment thought it was all gonna be fine and then suddenly i'm in this gown and i'm about to be lying on this table and having like this procedure done where like a part of my skin and my mole is being completely removed and cut out of me and i like had no time to mentally prepare for that that day i had no idea that would happen so quickly so i had injections in my side to numb the area and then they did the removal of that and then at the same time they actually removed the two on my head as well so i was in there for like probably around an hour two hours yeah why is it outside really yeah so the whole thing was probably about two hours oh yeah because we had to go and extend the parking on the car so the ones on my head i wasn't worried about that there was no pain she numbed it the area again um the only thing i felt was like some scraping because she got them off i wasn't too worried about those that was more my choice to get rid of those two but the one on my side i was like kind of thinking oh my god i'm gonna have to wait for test results all right guys we are out and i have to wear this on my head and i'm just hoping hoping that i don't bump into any of you guys or anyone who watches the vlogs with this on my head i mean it could just look like i've dyed my hair very dark black yeah maybe uh there's like a big bandage on the back of your head so if anyone sees that it's obvious you've had something done yeah well good it went very well apparently what an unexpected totally unexpected day totally i don't know i thought i was just going for a checkup type thing yeah and turns out we had three procedures done at the same time in one day yeah i'm surprised they could fit in on the same day actually i thought in the uk you have to wait weeks for that wouldn't you yes absolutely i mean it is like a private place it was expensive i'm glad it's done i'm glad it's sorted yeah just waiting on one little result yeah uh which next week you'll go back to the pictures to be removed yeah so yeah did not expect any of this today i thought i was just going to check up i was hoping they'd say yeah everything looks good um but there we go good to get these things done guys if you're putting it off yourself go and get it done this is a little reminder anyway fast forward a little bit fast forward one week and we go back and i'm thinking oh my god this whole week i haven't really been able to relax because we haven't had any results lucy had to i think there's some vlogs where you can see it under my hat i didn't mention it at the time because i wanted to wait until i had some results and i was filming this video i had to have dressing on my head and dressing on my side i couldn't go to the gym for one week no it ended up being nearly two weeks lucy had to redo all the dressings on my head every day with some cream and some like antiseptic stuff and also on my side had like a huge bandage on my side and bandage on my head and stuff i also had stitches in my side so i couldn't like lift up or walk downstairs too quickly because it would like pull against the stitches and be painful it also meant i was useless around the house i couldn't uh do the vacuum cleaning wash out like i couldn't do stuff i was pretty much useless we were still trying to get all our vlogs ready before christmas um it was hard to focus on that to be honest because it was on my mind so much so we go back a week later for the second appointment and when i walk in she doesn't say anything she just goes i'll have a seat and we'll and we'll have a look at your head and we'll have a look inside see how it's healing and at that point i was thinking oh my god if it was good news at this point and don't worry the story gets a lot better i've actually had a result now and everything's fine but it was at that point i was thinking if it was a totally clear result she would have surely just told me straight away to reassure me so she then says to me okay they've had a look at the mole and they agree that the cell structure is abnormal or not she said not too good doesn't look good um they need to do another test but a current consideration for what it could be is a melanoma which to be honest scared me a lot because i've never been told that the whole thing was like totally came out of nowhere i just thought it was a routine appointment so at that point i was like really down lucy was quite upset about it she was in the other room she could hear it all and yeah we had to go home but she said because it's the christmas period we're going to get this other test done to see if it is or isn't thankfully it isn't we've had the result back a few days ago but at that point we didn't know so we had to wait another like what we thought would be until the 6th of jan so over a week over christmas two weeks three weeks okay like three weeks waiting over christmas we thought we would have to wait i was kind of i i kept telling myself stuff in my mind like if it is then it's already removed it's good but at this point she'd already checked my back in more detail and she's like there's three others i kind of want to look at if this one is bad because they look similar but she said if it's a good result then i won't be concerned about those other ones so i was pretty much so since that second appointment where she said it could be i've been pretty much freaking out about it and i just want to say at this point i feel for anyone who has had medical results and it's not come back the way that you wanted because even though not knowing was like torture because i don't know you start thinking about like future plans and costs what's it what um like long-term health what you're going to do about it because you've done anything to prevent you you start thinking about all these things we're still trying to go out and make fun vlogs we're still trying to enjoy lives and go around and do stuff we're still trying to have christmas we're still trying to do all this stuff but it's just this lingering thing in the back of your mind i couldn't go to the gym so whenever i don't work out and exercise my mood dips anyway and it was just this very very weird period in time so i just wanted to kind of make this video today to say if anyone is putting off going to make that kind of appointment for anything it could be anything you just feel like something isn't quite right go and do it because the peace of mind that you get when everything's all good is so relieving we were actually it was the day after christmas day we were still at mikenelli's and the doctor actually personally texted me which i was so grateful for saying she'd had the result and she had to text me straight away everything was good it was just a benign thing absolutely nothing to worry about go and enjoy the rest of your christmas enjoy the rest of your break your time off and i was so so happy at that point because it was a relief that was lifted after weeks and weeks of kind of wondering and weeks of weeks of almost life being on hold a little bit because we didn't feel like i didn't feel like doing much i didn't feel like seeing friends i didn't feel like going out i didn't feel like vlogging that much i didn't feel like actually the filming the vlogs was a little bit of a distraction but as soon as that it came back into your mind like you wake up and then you remember it's just like it's just not a nice but there we go that's a little update i just wanted to kind of document that i also want to say thank you to the guys at cordon because they've been awesome and this is no way we're not in affiliation with them or working with them on this or anything paid full price for all the treatment it was expensive put a little clip in here um and then the further test was was a little bit again on top of that so yeah i'm gonna wrap up here but i just wanted to document that part of my life and just say to anyone who's considering getting things checked just go ahead and do it and obviously a huge thank you to the team that helped me and thanks to lucy who helped do all my dressing and stuff i have to say it's so nice having these gone i can just brush my hair yeah huge relief it wasn't a nice feeling like you said i mean i know it wasn't on me but yeah but it was kind of you were involved yeah your mind just races every second and you say what if what if what f and i and i did know that i mean there are worse things that can happen with that type of skin cancer but usually you can get it removed and cut out and that's job done to be honest i hadn't thought further than that that was my worst case get them all removed and we'll be fine but just so so happy that don't have to go through that yeah and of course just a big relief isn't it yeah i'm just thinking of anyone who's had um news and results that they weren't hoping for so that just got to be horrible so yeah yes there you go a little different video today you guys um come out tomorrow for another usual vlog but if you are new around here this is not the type of video we usually make but this is our this is our vlogging channel this is our kind of documentation of our life and what goes on and i think it's important if i can make one person go for a checkup and they need to get something sorted then that's helpful because it was only because of lucy's friend that i made my appointment yeah and that was just one person that i saw so you never know this video could help someone yeah we'll see in the next one very very soon guys thanks for watching and we'll see in the next video bye [Music] you