NEVER FORGET THE LIFE YOU PROMISED YOURSELF - Powerful Motivational Speech Video

The more time you spend alone with yourself, the more time that you will be able to understand who you are. When I mean understand who you are, I'm talking about without any outside interference, without any friends, without any uh peer pressure of wanting to be like someone else. It's not about the shoes. It's about knowing where you're going, not forgetting where you started. It's about having the courage to fail, not breaking when you're broken, taking everything you've been given and making something better. It's about work and what's inside of you. It's doing what they say you can't. Being who you were born to be. I could have done better in some areas, but I know I still kept going, you know? I didn't put my head down. I had days where it was like, damn, you know, but I got to keep going. And that's that's the whole mentality that you always need to have. That's how you be, that's how you're diligent. You're determined. You persevere. Persevere. That's that's has to be a part of your DNA to be successful. You got to learn to shut your feelings off if you want to achieve greatness. And greatness is only achieved when your feelings about that kind of I'm talking about the grind. Theing grind. Your feelings have to go away. You have to suffer. You have to make that a tattoo on your brain so when that hard time comes again, you don't forget it. I'd say one of the strongest mental frames that has gotten me through my hardest times is thinking this will be the story that I will one day tell. And that means the harder it is, the bigger the dragon, the more epic the story. And by consequence, the more epic the hero. Winners define themselves by what they made happen. And losers define themselves by what happened to them. It starts right now. And if you're not doing the now, don't ever respect the later to be the person you want to look in the mirror. Everyone's like, "Oh, later in life I want to do this. Later in life, I want to do that." Later in life is turning around, looking in the mirror right now. That's the later in life. And unless that turnaround is something in progression, most of the limitations we have do not exist in reality. They exist only in your own mind. And one of the starting points of great achievement is to start questioning those self-limiting beliefs and throw them off and act as if they did not exist. [Music] Too many of you are sitting around waiting to feel ready. You can still look forward when you're not ready. It's about the action. your mind, your history, your past. You will always have a million excuses not to do it, not to feel like it, not to believe in yourself. They're all the only thing that matters in your life, in your business, is the actions that you're taking. And the more consistently that you take action, the faster you will start to believe in yourself because you will see proof that you are not the kind of person that sits around and feels unworthy. That you're not a victim that sits by and gets sucked into other people's stuff. That you're not that kind of person. So it won't make sense to believe in anymore. But it starts with action. Overcoming the old self allows us to become somebody else. And there is that period of transition. Yeah. I call it the void where there's just not a lot happening and you just got to be able to keep going and continuously get to the end of your belief where most people stop. We've been hypnotized and conditioned into becoming materialists. I think that we define reality with our senses and I think that is one of the biggest illusions. So the fundamental question is can you believe in a future that you can't see or experience with your senses yet but you've thought about enough times in your mind that your brain is literally changed to look like the event has already occurred. Follow your dream and ne don't be afraid to fail. You will fail sometimes and you you learn success by failure. Never give up. Every block down is a block up. Every misfortune is a fortune. Get off the porch. Don't give up. If you've got a goal in mind and someone can tell you not to take that goal and you believe it, you don't have a goal. Stay on course. And to the extent you are successful, to the extent you have this thing, which is that you're willing to step into spaces you were illprepared for. So it seems to me like you're willing to you kind of think like if I get my foot in the door then I'll figure this stuff out. Whereas what most people do, this is killing you by the way. I won't step into the door until I'm completely prepared which is a total fallacy anyways as an entrepreneur have a music career or an artist or anything great. If you're waiting for a threshold of I need to be totally prepared then I'll step in the door. You will be on the other side of that door the rest of your life. [Music] You're haunted by all the opportunities that you missed by not bringing your best at that time when you could have won that but you didn't win because you allowed life to interfere with that one shot. That's greatness. Greatness is your recall. Greatness is being so aware of the time of life in the second that went by and you can recall like it was yesterday. Greatness is being able to go back there not making that same mistake again and being haunted by it. That is greatness. People [Music] have got to reject this notion that they have to be protected from the outside and putting all their time and energy into that. Be the change you want to see in the world. If you want to see people strong enough to withhold a better weight, then don't worry about trying to fix systems. Just get tough. Watch how people respond to you. Watch how your kids look up to you. Watch how your family members look up to you. Watch how people turn to you and want help. People, we have an innate desire to get strong. We don't have an innate desire to have something else protect us. On the mental side of what's driving a lot of people not believing in that is we're just culturally reinforcing that like we're stuck. We're trapped. There's nothing we can do that people don't understand. The fulfillment has to be earned. You can't tell someone to just love themselves. You have to tell them how they earn self-respect. You have to tell them that doing hard that you don't want to do and doing it anyway, that's exactly how you gain selfworth. You can't just tell someone to feel worthy. that at some point along the way we get confused and we misunderstand who we are. We start building this false sense of self around all the stories and all the labels and all the things and we start living our life that way and we get confused about how life works, how we interact with life. We start living much smaller than we really are. [Music] And so when we do that, we start to move away from our dreams. We start to give up on this beautiful thing that we're here to give birth to in the world. And then we get stuck cuz we don't have that dream in front of us anymore that allows us to overcome all the challenges in life, right? That pulls us into it. That's the thing that allows us to grow. And we get stuck. Truth is like a lot of people don't appreciate the fact that doing anything exceptional requires a lot of work, right? And it requires that anonymous work that you do when no one's looking and you know when the going gets tough and you're conflicted over what it is that you're going to do on that day, it's easy to cave in. And so there's a level of like conviction and commitment to self that's required that I think you develop over time. There's some level of resilience and you know the persistence that comes with that. But if you don't appreciate that doing something hard is going to test you and is going to compel you to get out of your comfort zone then you're going to struggle. But sometimes your biggest breakthrough is in what you unlearn and then you relearn. Sometimes you have to disrupt your soil. Pull your soil up. Take that dry dirt that's been planted for years. I know. I just been knowing this for years. This is what my mother taught me. This is what we've always known. You have to disrupt that soil in order to plant a new seed to grow a new fruit. Not to necessarily keep you comfortable on what you know. Stay comfortable in that. I want to disrupt you in some things that are new awareness to go, "Oh, wait. Hold on." Or a new awareness about what you've been doing based on what you've known forever that doesn't fit your future anymore. Cuz I can guarantee you every single one of us who want something different than what we're getting, we're doing something unconsciously from old patterns that doesn't even serve our future. Do whatever you're doing the best you can knowing there's the bigger horizon. So the big problem I see is people want more and they hate what they're doing. So that if they're they're in a they're in a state of mind where God, I just want I'm done with this crap, then someday I'll reach my dreams. And if you can flop that to go, no, this is the gateway to my dreams. This is what I have to do and I have to do it the best. It's not this is miserable. I hate it. I feel the next level and now I'm amazing. It's like you need to master that. [Music] Living in the past, you're going to be depressed because you are rehashing things that happened to you that are not going to happen again. If you're living in the future, you're going to be anxious because you are anticipating what's coming or you're wishing for things that aren't happening yet. Being in the present moment is where you will have the greatest control and where happiness flourishes. You surround ourselves around people that make us feel great, that tell us what we want to hear. The second we put ourselves amongst the uncommon people, we don't like that feeling. I don't know. I've lost my edge. What's going on? Cuz once you hit the top of the mountain, guess what happened? I'm good. I'm good. So, you wonder why you're falling down now? Because once you reach top of the mountain, you got to build a another one. That's mediocrity. There's a lot of people in mediocrity who have a nice resume, but they're one-timers, man. You don't become what you want. You become where your habits take you. [Music] There's no ending. And that's the person I listen to. That's the person who's gained knowledge. You gain knowledge through suffering. And on the other end of suffering is a world that very few very few have ever seen. It's a beautiful world cuz that's where you find yourself. So, it's the same thing with failure. It's how you use it. It's that drive inside of you. Okay? It's what we talk about the dark side. The dark side is filled with failure, but it's the fuel that burns you like something that's never burned inside you before. And this is the problem. It's the same obstacle. The difference is when you have a clear set clear destination, the obstacles become easy to overcome. When you don't have a clear destination, you keep coming to a grinding halt. People want to feel that the effort that they're exerting actually are moving somewhere. And so successful measurement, successful recognition is not just for the steps you take. It's not just for the effort. It's that the effort you exerted moved us closer to where we're trying to get to. And that get to should be some crazy ideal. The magnitude of the reward you experience as you're moving towards a goal is proportionate to the importance of the goal. So that means the more important the goal you pick, the more possibility there is for that is life affirming. Fear fuels you. Fear lets you know go get more information. Fear lets you know stay up a little later and study. Fear lets you know get up a little earlier. Fear lets you know ask for help. Fear is informing you. It's not stopping you. It's just another emotion like love and compassion and gratitude. We just made it paralyze us. [Music] And if we are condition, if we conditioned ourselves to believe certain kinds of things, and one of the things that we kind of believe and hang on to and and live with is this whole idea that all of the things that happened to me in my past are what are keeping me from doing what I'd like to do today. be willing to go to the edge and not just lean over and feel the breeze and watch the people jump and watch them soar and look through the windows at all the people who are living great lives. Don't just go to the edge and feel it. Be willing to lean. Feel your heartbeat. Feel it. that lets you know you're alive. That lets you know you're okay. That is a formula for misery. And what we do in our life is we compare ourselves to the best day and the best picture on social media that we see of somebody else. We compare ourselves at different times in our lives, too. You know, even if you're in a relationship, comparing your relationship in its fifth year to its fifth week isn't fair to that relationship. There's different stages in our life. So, comparison is a pathway. There's pathways to happiness and there's pathways that lead us to unhappiness. One of those for sure is comparison. And it's an ego thing often times with us. We're always trying to one up things in our life. It's a matter I think really of being more present in the moment in your life and saying I deserve to be happy right now. and has a very specific universal formula. And that formula is work your ass off to get very good at something that you care deeply about that allows you to serve not only yourself but other people. That's it. Bait your own element. Don't try and perform someone else's expertly. Don't waste your time trying to live someone else's life. Be trapped by dogma. Focus in on your own strengths, your own element, what you have to offer. Don't get lost in trying to become like someone else or pretend to be someone else. And too many of us are fish trying to climb a tree. Too many of us are monkeys being taught how to swim. Too many of us are lions being taught to live like cats. We're not getting to live in an element. So my second piece of advice is live in that element that you've naturally been given. Don't try adopt another. You know, we've all got a special genius inside of us. The fact that nobody's watching is utterly irrelevant to me. It has everything to do with myself. Now the reason that this is important, the reason that I think that people need to do this is because that's how you shape your behavior. So like water over time can create create the Grand Canyon or you can take uh a polishing rock and shape stones. You can shape your personality. You can certainly shape your identity and shape your behaviors if you learn how to reward and punish yourself. I know a lot of people don't want to hear that. That is the truth of the human condition. One thing I realized is that at certain times in a man's life, he's either a fool, he's a victim, or he's a king. And when you're a fool, you're like, you think there are no consequences for your actions, but there are always consequences for every act you do, everything. And let me tell you, the table is always full of excuses, because they're valid. There's a lot of people against you and you can say, "Oh my god, this table is full." It's like, man, you know, this is the reason why I'm like this and this is this is and and man, you never went out. You have to accept whatever you are letting into your life, good or bad. You don't have to accept any of those excuses. You have to know that you are responsible for your life, good and bad. you did that. So if something's not right, it's your responsibility to change it. [Music] [Music] Humans are obviously incredible. Look at what we've created. It's it's outrageous if you think about who we were millions of years ago and where we are now. We're obviously capable of incredible achievements. We're also the most brilliant social animal on planet. We're capable of cooperating and working on teams to a level that no other animal has ever reached. We are built to constantly compare ourselves to other people. We're always thinking of what the other person has and how we are in relation to them. Are we getting as much attention as that other person? It started off when we were children. Are we getting more attention than our siblings from our parents? So we're continually comparing ourselves in rank, in power, in status to the people around us. And this is deep force within us and it's constant every day, every moment. You don't realize it, but you're going through that. And social media, it completely exacerbates this tendency in human nature. People are so focused on technology, but that we need to focus much more on human nature, on understanding people. That's the primary skill that you need in life. There is something deeply ingrained in each individual person of the particular individual nature that we all have and that causes us to go into compulsive patterns of behavior. Everybody has a where does it come from? Some of it comes from our DNA, our genetics, things we can't control that we've inherited from our parents. Some of it comes from our early attachments and some of it comes as we get older and we interact with teachers and mentors and various people who create a certain way we view ourselves. If people keep telling us that we're not really worthy, that we're not good students. We internalize that and we end up becoming like that. So it's a mix of things. You know, each person has a mix of these qualities. The origin of wisdom according to the Greeks was know thyself. I believe that very firmly that knowledge about who you are is an end in itself and will help you in so many ways become that human being that I think we all have the potential to become. But if you begin to look at yourself and question, why do I feel this way and examine it and look at perhaps other sources of it, then you can begin this process of understanding instead of just simply accepting that you feel or have this certain idea. So question yourself, stop assuming that everything you do is so brilliant and smart and right and imagine that maybe your ideas don't come from yourself. Maybe you're feeling some political anger or whatever comes to the fact that you're just assuming it from other people. You're following things like Facebook and you're getting swept up in some viral. You want to think that you're completely independent and autonomous, but maybe you're not as independent as you think. If you go through life thinking you don't have a problem, that you know who you are, that your relationships with people are fine, that everything is hunky dory, then you're never going to be able to even begin to go into the process. So, admit you have a problem. Admit you don't understand the people you deal with. When you admit that, now you're motivated to try and learn. If belief is a construct, then like any other construct, it can be manipulated and changed. And at any moment, this is so important. At any moment you can choose to believe something new about yourself. Now the weird thing about belief is as soon as you change that belief it becomes true. Why that is I will never quite understand. What weird quirk of human evolution has left us in a space where simply believing it makes it true. If you think you're dumb, guess what? You're dumb. Now if you don't know this quote, live by it. One can have no smaller or greater mastery than mastery over oneself. That's Da Vinci. We humans are constantly emitting information about our real emotions. It comes out nonverbally and you're not picking up these signals. You're so focused on people's words that you're missing this other reality which is so incredibly eloquent. My meditation is all about emptying the mind. But it's impossible to empty the mind. So, as you're meditating, thoughts come to you. Anxieties, worries, resentments. I've trained myself to question where they are. Each time I feel anger at my sibling or my mother or or friend for saying something that I misinterpreted, I go, "That's your ego speaking. You these people weren't saying something that was personal. You just have your ego, which is always getting in your way. Question it. So question my impatience, my frustrations, etc. Accepting people and loving them for who they are is an incredibly liberating thing. Now, you can't do that for everyone. Some people are so toxic and ugly, but you're never going to reach a point where you're going to love them, but you can understand them. And then understanding them, you don't have to internalize the pain they inflict on. We humans normally go through life kind of not accepting things. We want things to be different from the way they are. We want to have a better wife or husband. We want our children to be better. We don't like the political system. We want this sort of utopia to suddenly come about. We want people to be different. We want this. We want that. And to me, that meant you are anti-life. You are against life because life isn't like that. Life is a series of facts. Life is what it is. We've evolved a certain way. your reality is a certain way. It is what it is. You want to love life. You want to love fate. And what fate means, things happen to you. You can't control. You didn't control who your parents are. You didn't control what city you were born into, what school you went into. You didn't control whether you were born rich or poor. Right? There's much you can't control. That's fe. Accept it for what it is. Stop whining. Stop going, I want something else. Embrace your world, your light. Our fear of death is probably the greatest influence on our behavior throughout history. We're the only animal that's conscious of our mortality. And it's caused an incredible reaction. So how then as it's going through my fingers am I not able to find fulfillment and the reason is that fulfillment exists outside of all of that fulfillment has to do with the last part of what I believe the purpose of life is and that is to exist doing something in service of something greater than yourself and if you're not able to tap into that then you're never going to get that fulfillment that you want in your life. Everything you believe is a choice. If you forget any of that stuff, then you will not be able to make yourself in the person that you want to be. Man cannot remake himself without suffering for he is both the marble and the sculptor. It gives me the chills even now to think about that to know that if I want to become the person that I want to become, I am going to pay a price. And to me, the question that we all have to ask is who do I want to be? What do I want to become? And how high of a price am I willing to pay to get there? [Music] If life is beating you down and it's hurting you and your internal dialogue is, man, we're struggling. If you're failing, if you're falling, never falling out in life. If your mind is telling you, hey, we're in the fight. We're not going anywhere. You can't hurt me. No matter what you do to me, no matter what you bring on me, no matter how bad life is, I'm gonna be right here standing right in the middle of the ring. And the ring is the ring of life. Comparison is the death of joy. And not only does it kill your joy, it kills your motivation. It kills your energy or your desire to move forward. It makes you more insecure. The only person you have to be better than is who you were yesterday. man, whatever you're doing, do as unto the Lord. Like every day I'm trying to be better. I think a bad day for the ego is a great day for the soul. And one thing I've realized is we we become victims when we recite our excuses. And we recite them so many times we actually believe they are true. And I think you can cling to your excuses or you can go out there and have an impact and live a fulfilling life and be highly creative and and enjoy the magic life. But you you don't get to do both. We are pattern learning machines. And if you feel stuck or broken, I guarantee you while you feel that way, you're not. You have a pattern of behavior or a pattern of thinking that is broken. And we need to be disrupted because we love our patterns. And so wherever it is in your life that something is broken, there is a pattern that you don't see yet that is making you continue to stay in a broken situation. is he said those who love peace need to learn to organize themselves as well as those who love war right those who love peace need to learn to organize themselves as well as those who love war i.e People are trying to build destruction in the world and distractions in the world are highly organized, highly focused, highly data oriented, highly strategic, highly processdriven. And so we have to be the same. And so for me, my plea to all of you and to myself is whatever we're going to do, let's get really strategic about it. Let's bring sincerity and strategy together. Let's bring data and dynamism together. Let's bring intuition and insight together, right? Let's not let's not look beyond that and think, "Oh, that stuff's going to work out because I int my intention's nice, right? Your intention is not going to run a mile, but it will help you run the marathon, but it's not going to run that mile that you need to do right now." And so for me, intention and action, intention and attention, both of them are required. And so my recommendation is whatever your dream is, whatever you're inspired by, whatever you think is going to have a positive impact in the world, bring both to that, right? Don't settle for one or the other. More importantly, figuring out why they're not doing the framework. And then more importantly, what are you trying to accomplish? That's the question because we have to accomplish happiness. That has to be the goal. And if you actually pressured yourself to be happy versus pressuring yourself to be a success, then you have a totally different conversation with yourself. Then you have a totally different conversation with yourself. And when you start doing that for yourself, not to prove it to your spouse or your siblings or your parents or the people you went to school with, then it gets really good. It gets really good when it gets really quiet. And it's super quiet for me. Heart moves into this kind of rhythm. When you're feeling frustration, when you're feeling impatient, when you're feeling resentment, you were stepping on the gas pedal and energy literally leaves the heart. Now you no longer believe in your future. You can't put your heart into your future. You can't trust the outcome cuz there's no energy there. It's it's being used and consumed somewhere else. So energy is leaving the brain as well. But once energy starts to move into the heart and it starts to beat in this rhythm like banging a drum or dropping a pebble in water, pebble after pebble, the heart begins to create a wave of energy right to the brain and all of a sudden you see this wave brain gets this rush of energy and that change in brain wave patterns. That change that wave is carrying information and the person starts to get a very clear idea. They see their future very clearly. Fear, you know, people make it this complex process. This woman told me that I don't understand why I don't do this, why I feel this way. I said, it's called fear. Everybody's afraid. We're not enough. Everybody's afraid. We're not rich enough, smart enough, young enough, quick enough, fast enough. It's human nature. But the secret is to do it anyway. And building a muscle so that you take action first automatically because if you don't do that, it's hard. You lose momentum. It's like, how do I get started? Where do I go? And I tell people, throw a rock, wherever it drops, start there. It is start the process of moving forward rather than fear stopping. You can't take the world further than where you visited internally. But some it's the sun is always out. It's just get covered by the clouds and that's us. We've just been covered and we get covered by those clouds and they cloud our identity. They cloud our perception. So all we're doing for ourselves and others is clearing out the clouds. And the more we do that for ourselves, the more we can do it for others. and the more we do it for others and more we do it for ourselves. A lot of ickies are against us in life and a lot of times you may be standing alone. The only voice you may have is your own voice. So if you're not relentless in your pursuit to be the very best person you can about being whoever the hell you want to be. You have to have that kind of dog in you to to realize I might be out here alone in the street and I got to be able to fight on my own. There's a way where there's a will, there's a way for be to begin to create a way out of nowhere. There are a lot of people who are biting their fingers in fear that they might lose their jobs. But there are few people who have decided within themselves, I'm going to make it. Some people aren't waiting to be cut. Some people are moving on their own because they feel within themselves. I've got what it takes to make it. feel often that your own thoughts are the things that trip you up in life, that you wish that your mind were more positive. And what it means to be human is that your brain and your body want you to survive. Your brain and your body remember situations that scare the daylights out of you. Your brain and your body try to talk you out of anything that makes you feel risky. And your brain given that it has been trained by situations in the past and given that you allow it to worry all the time, you have a habit of doing it. If you're not careful and you're not deliberate, your brain will default to scary crap. That doesn't mean you're broken. It means that your brain is thinking something that's broken and it's time for you to reset your mindset and pull it back. You're not going to succeed on a large scale until you face the threshold of control. And once you face it, you'll face it again and again, but it'll become an old friend cuz you'll keep growing. What's the threshold of control? It's where you get to the edge where you feel like you just can't do it. Like if I put a dot in the middle of life and I go, "This is a problem." And if you have a comfort zone that says I that's within the things I know how to deal with, you'll land. But if this is the circle of what you can deal with and problem is way out here, it feels out of control like I don't know what to do. So what we have to do is we have to learn to take where our comfort zone is and expand it. And the only way that happens quite frankly in most cases is you face a real challenge. You know what's going on in the material world is totally you know not the point. What matters is do we have that vision of potent in our mind? Do we see a possible future for us to step into that will make our lives better? And as soon as you take away that vision, we don't know what to do with ourselves and and we we despair essentially is how how we need to constantly be constructing these dreams and these visions for ourselves and what happens when they're taking to visit it. Like people hate working out. You're only going to visit working out maybe an hour a day. 23 other hours of the day you're not in it. But how you become in shape is you must visit suffering. Visit working out 1 hour a day. Visit suffering 1 hour a day. Visit your past failures 1 hour a day. The relationship with it is the answers are in there. They they are in there within the suffering. Go in there. I call it the live autopsy. Change things. It transforms things to make things better. When I said responsibility, you know, with great responsibility comes great power. The most important thing to be responsible for is how you feel. And we are sometimes, you know, we're thermometers. We react to the weather if we're honest, the economy, to politics. We react to how people treat us sometimes. But is there a gap between how something someone stimulates us and how we respond? Do we have choice? The difference between a thermometer and a thermostat though is a ther a thermometer reacts the environment. What does the thermostat do though? Yeah, it regulates, right? It helps manage. It sets a standard or a vision or a goal. And then what happens to the environment? It raises to be able to do that. Is there a difference? And so that's where we're going back to responsibility. When we're talking about being responsible, the ability to be able to respond is how you feel about things and also how you focus on things. Fear is adaptive. You run from the unknown, run from challenges. So if you're living in survival, there's better chances of surviving. If you run from the unknown, and by the way, when you're living in survival, have the infinite potentials in the quantum field. You'll select the worst case scenario in your mind. And you'll begin to emotionally prepare yourself for the worst case scenario because you have better chances of surviving. If you are fascinated, then that's an area where you're going to ask yourself one very simple question. Do I want to become the best in the world at that thing? The most important thing that passion will do for you, which is it's going to pull you through boredom. It's going to pull you through the hard times. And that's why it's really got to be something that you just are prepared to become great at. Because when you're prepared to become great, there's just these insane moments of boredom, uh, repetition, and all of that. And if you have this burgeoning passion coming out of that, that's what's going to give you the energy to get through it. [Music] Most people are waiting for their life to change, feel abundance, feel whole. You know, that's the old model of cause and effect. You know, if you're living with emptiness, you're living with lack, you're living with pain, most people have been conditioned that something out there has to take away this emptiness or feeling inside of them. If you are able to become familiar with gratitude, become familiar with wholeness, become familiar with abundance, to become familiar with freedom, and you're able to generate those chemicals every single day, more than likely, you would be walking around feeling like your future has already happened, that you would no longer be looking for it to happen. [Music] A decision is the first step. I think one of the biggest ways that all of us can hold ourselves back is listening to that nasty little lie inside our head that says, "I'm not ready yet. I don't have enough experience. I don't have enough credentials. Who am I to do X, Y, or Z?" And then we just delay, delay, delay. And before you know it, months, if not years have gone by and we haven't made any real progress. Well, the first thing I would say is, well, you should be afraid of taking risks and pursuing something meaningful, but you should be more afraid of staying where you are if it's making you miserable. It's like the first thing you want to do is dispense with the idea that you get to have any any permanent security outside of your ability to contend and adapt. You're paying a price by sitting there being miserable. You might say, "Well, the devil I know is better than the one I don't." It's like don't be so sure of that. The clock is ticking. If you're miserable in your job now and you change nothing in 5 years, you'd be much more miserable and you'll be a lot older. Resolve means it's done. It's like it doesn't even if you took action, it's done inside you. So, it's done out there. There's no question whatsoever. Then once you decide the only way the commitment and the energy and the momentum continues is if you take immediate massive what my friends massive what? Massive action is the cure all. Massive action is the cure all. If you're having a difficult time with something, your relationship isn't where you want it to be, your finances are not where you want to be, your body is not where you want to be, your business is not where you want to be, you need to take massive action. And if that doesn't work, try something else. If that doesn't work, try something else. Keep going with massive action and you will find the way because it will give you momentum. The hard thing is taking the first step. everything else is just persistence. And I've always loved that quote because it's so true. It doesn't mean that you're going to get it right. It doesn't mean that just because you start you're going to win. In fact, most likely the first thing you do, you're going to fail. Think about all the times that you guys tried something and it failed. And the question is, what did you do then? If you learned from it, doubled down, figured it out, focused only on the truth, then you'll move forward. You move forward because you believe you can learn. And that's that thing hiding in that. And this is the thing. When people ask me, hey, my mom or my wife, my husband, whatever, they don't have that belief system. How do I get them there? The answer is you don't until they are convinced that they can learn anything that they put their mind to that their energies double down into that area of gaining skills will actually pay off with a realworld ability to do something new. They're not going to act. I don't remember now. I'm not talking about what makes you happy. It's a luxury to pursue what makes you happy. It's a moral obligation to pursue what you find meaningful. A goal. We develop a vision and work towards it. And it things inevitably get better for people. It's not a luxury. It's it's difficult. It's a moral responsibility and it isn't happiness. It's it's not the pursuit isn't for happiness. [Music] Life is the most brutal endurance sport of all time. And that's what we have to love about it. We have to flip it on its head and love the fact that life continues to attack us. There are no timeouts. You have to figure out on the fly. You have to be that person who's always prepared. But the song too right now that a lot of us are dealing with is what we don't want to deal with. It's the fact that we have to think about all these things that we don't like it by ourselves. We like to use life as a big escape. That escape is not there anymore. All these distractions that we use, they're no longer there. This the time out now for you to stop avoiding things. Get that pen and paper out. Look inside yourself. Stop looking at me or other people out here to be the hero of your story. This is time for you right now and all that solitude to get to know who you are as a person. Be alone with yourself knowing one thing in life. We are all very fragile in this world. We have to know that when we die, we die with some meaning and some purpose in this world is to generate a vision of it's really it's not a it's not a plan or a strategy. It's a philosophical vision justifies your life in some way that you deeply believe has to be that and it can't be trivial because otherwise procrastination and instant gratification are going to rule you. So the first question you might ask yourself is well what would you need to gain and you have to have a real dialogue with yourself to understand this you have to take yourself warts and all your useless procrastinating instant gratification seeking self and you have to sit down and say all right you know you're talking to your inner badly behaved six-year-old it's like okay what is it that you would have to have in order to commit to something in the long what kind vision of the future would would justify sacrifices for you. [Music] Here's the question. You're taking care of yourself like you're someone you care about. You can design a future that would be good for you if you were taking care of yourself right for 20 minutes. You can have what you want. It's 3 years down the road. You can have whatever you want. You have to aim for it and work for it and you have to specify it. What is it? What do you want? What would make your life worthwhile? What would be good enough so that instant gratification would be an obstacle instead of a means for proceeding? If you make a decision in a state without momentum, if you make a decision from a place where there's no passion, you are not going to get momentum. It'll kill momentum. It's decide, commit, and resolve. Some of you in the past, you've gotten momentum, you've gotten passionate, you've even made a decision. But a decision is the first step. Decision is like a war. I got to do this or that. All right, I'm going to make myself do this. But commitment is when you now after you've decided you commit to do this for the long term. Whether it's hard or easy doesn't matter. You're doing this. The most important conversation you will ever have is the one you have with yourself. So I slowly started changing that internal dialogue in my head. And that was where the power came from. The power came from no one's helping me. No one's coming back to save me. No one's coming back to pull me to the finish line. This is on you. So I saw a lot of power in the fact that if I change this around, I I did this. I changed this around. Secret to success. There's a system to success. And no matter what organization you become a part of, the system works if you work it. If you don't work it, it won't work. But it works if you work it. And that's one fourletter word that most people don't like. They're not willing to work. Go in there hoping it doesn't happen. Why? Because they don't want to do the work. It's an aversion to most people's spirit. Is that, you know, we are more than what we're demonstrating. that we've been sold this lie that people are taught through school. But the truth is everyone could do this too and so much more apply towards creativity and focus and flow and problem solving and thinking and and and and really overcoming the biggest challenges of their life and maybe even the the world. The challenge is we were taught a lie. We were taught a lie that somehow our intelligence, our potential, our learning, our memory somehow is fixed. Our creativity is fixed. Our thinking is fixed like our shoe size. This is about transcending. You know, this is about ending the trance. Ending the trance that you're that we're not good enough, you know, that we're not smart enough, that we we're not this genius, and telling the truth. And the and the truth is people could we're faster and we're smarter than we think. And not just to be able to wrote memorize things, but be able to really solve significant challenges and maybe that these challenges that we're going through are the lessons that we need to to learn the most. And then some people who learn those lessons feel compelled to be able to share that voice with other people. So, it's not just one candle. You know, we just can set things ablaze. You got to rise up. You got to make your dreams a reality and live a damn masterpiece. You know this. Now, here's the thing. Couple things. You got to make a decision. Listen to me. You got to make a decision. What's the decision? What's the thing you came here for? Now, we're at the moment. The clock is ticking. People say all the time, "Hey, life is short." Let me tell you something. Life can be long. You bury your dreams, you quit this, life gets long. See, time's relative. 2 minutes of you being with your sweetie, doing whatever you like to do with them, that can go by quick, right? What about the last 2 minutes on a treadmill? Does that not seem like it goes by for like 4 hours, right? So, if you're enjoying it, it's short. If it's painful, it's long. Life can be long. Happens when you screw up your intrinsic motivation. what half right when you're not when you're not living with passion, purpose, regular access to flow, all of the things that the art of a polos are about, the tools that I breaking down, when you use them right, the result is Superman. When you use them wrong or don't use them at all, if you're not using the organism the way the organism was designed to be used, the result is anxiety and depression. And we're in the middle of the largest anxiety and depression kind of epidemic in the history of the world. So there's I strikes me that there's a correlation here thought that I love which says you know who you are when no one's watching and what you do when no one's watching that's who you are. You know when you're alone what you choose and I think that that really helps you overcome your ego because when we reflect on ourselves when no one's around that's when we're truly uncovering who we are. I'm not a conspiracy theorist at all, but I do know where public school came from. And public school was invented by factory owners who didn't have enough compliant factory workers. Do what you're told. Go to the placement office. You get a job for 50 years. You'll be able to go home and watch TV. Buy enough stuff you only need a storage unit, but then you'll die. And the mistake, the problem is that people are still seduced into thinking that what they're supposed to do is fit in more. And social media has made it worse because there's this whole pack mentality of how do I fit in more with small bursts of here's one quick tip for a flat stomach and three different ways to get rich and you can learn to flip houses today and be a millionaire tomorrow. None of which work, right? But the combination of those two mean that people are starting to feel broken and bitter cuz the promise isn't being kept. So first of all, the screens themselves affect the brain, the developing brain. So the more times a kids a kid spends watching screens, the more it depletes the dopamine receptors and dopamine receptors are the ones that get implicated in addiction later on. The the incentive motivation of circuitry of the brain. Number one, the child develops an attachment relationship with the machine. So what we say about the digital media is it's a good thing, but so is sex and so is alcohol. But we don't give 2-year-olds alcohol and we don't introduce 5 years old to sexual practices. Why? Cuz they're not ready to handle it. So you give digital media to kids when they're old enough to handle it. When are they old enough to handle it? When they no longer need rely on it to meet their emotional needs, but they use it for the function for which it was developed, which is information and communication. Those are legitimate goals. But when kids are immature and their attachment needs have not been met yet, they can use the digital media to meet their attachment needs, which displaces real human attachments. So what happens on Facebook? Kids have friends. What happens on Facebook? Kids like each other. These are attachment dynamics. Except the friends are not real friends. Because a real friend is somebody who really knows you intimately and accepts you and supports you and wants the best for you. These Facebook friendships are highly conditional as shown by the fact that when people disbelieve each other, they deffriend each other. And the likes are not real likes because what is being presented on digital media is a similar acronym of the real self. It's it's it's it's a self-chosen particle of who I really am. That's what shows off on Facebook. And so people like a part of me, but how does that satisfy my need to be accepted and respected and loved for who I really am? It actually undermines it. So the digital media is the very opposite of genuine human contact. Now, can it be used that way? Sure. If you got two young kids now and if you got parents who live in the United States and those kids want to connect with their grandparents, what a great device Skype is or Zoom is where they can connect. It's not just a letter. Anyway, that's a great way to connect. But who needs to be in charge of that? In other words, the digital media can be introduced to a child's life when the parents can stay in control of it. When the media takes over and the child is got this addictive relationship, the child is not ready for it. So we say don't introduce it too early number one and number two stay on top of it and you'll be in charge. Real teaching happens through uh personal contact through engagement through inviting and eliciting the kids curiosity through appealing to the child's increasing the sophisticated mind to hold complex ideas contradict their ideas sometimes at the same time those depend on maturation and that maturation depends on relationship with human beings. We know that screen time decreases happiness decreases life satisfaction and decreases self-esteem. We know that it increases enhances anxiety and depression. The Royal Society of Public Health published a study in June this year, June 2018, which found out that 6 63% of all Instagram users are unhappy. We know that anxiety and depression among the young increased by 70% over the last 30 years. And we know that since 2010, uh, teen suicide uh climbed by 31%. So tin suicide is rampant and today it is the first time in human history that the leading cause of death among teens up to the age of 24 is suicide not any disease or not even accidents and this is intimately connected to social media. I mentioned before that social media is conditioning tool, not an addictive tool, but a conditioning tool and that it uses um a relative positioning. But what are the emotions that are attached to relative positioning? Well, the first one is envy. Social media are constructed around envy, pathological envy. They are purveyors of pathological envy and amplifiers of pathological envy. And they quantify via various ranking uh algorithms. They quantify envy with likes, with retweets, with so they quantify envy and then they leverage envy to to motivate you. In other words, they use envy to cause you to adopt some course of action. People confuse jealousy with envy. And here's the difference. Jealousy, these platforms encourage repeat use, repeat compulsive use. And now we know from psychology that only these kind of emotions, aggression, envy, hatred, only these kind of emotions encourage repeated use and repeat. So there is no way that they have designed these platforms without being aware that they must leverage these emotions to create addiction. One in three Americans are now officially obese. And until we create a world where and hopefully the millennial generation will figure this out, we create a world where companies are all humanity plus. The fact is a large number of companies exists straight up as an algorithm for generating profit. And these algorithms I'm not saying the entrep these guys behind them are bad or or wrong. I'm just saying the algorithm of the company is to generate profit at all cost. And these might be counter to where we want to take the human species that we humans normally go through life kind of not accepting things. We want things to be different from the way they are. We want to have a better wife or husband. We want our children to be better. We don't like the political system. We want this sort of utopia to suddenly come about. We want people to be different. We want this. We want that. And to Nze that meant you are anti-life. You are against life because life isn't like that. Life is a series of facts. Life is what it is. We've evolved a certain way. Your reality is a certain way. It is what it is. And by quitting against you hate life. You want to love life. You want to love fate. And what fate means? Things happen to you you can't control. You didn't control who your parents are. You didn't control what city you were born into, what school you went into. You didn't control whether you were born rich or poor. Right? There's much you can't control its fate. Accept it for what it is. Stop whining. Stop going, I want something else. Embrace your world, your life. The our fear of death is probably the greatest influence on our behavior throughout history. We're the only animal that's conscious of our mortality. And it's caused an incredible reaction. We're avoidant. We're anxious. We invent an afterlife, a heaven where we'll all go, right? Or today we never see death. We never see people die in hospitals. We never see the animals that we eat being killed. We have no confrontation with death personally in our life. Completely disconnected from it. It makes us anxious and fearful. And that controls everything about our behavior. We become anxious and fearful about everything. So the ability to accept death and look it square in the eye and accept this is your reality that you're not going to live forever is very liberating. So a morati is a step from turning your back face this way going his life and oh I hate it. I don't want to turning around and facing it going I accept it. I love it. I embrace it. And it has a very powerful effect.