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邪惡的神祕奧祕 歡迎來到職業日 今天要告訴大家的 是Bart 的朋友的爸爸 Kirk Van Houten 有多少人的小孩 去了你的車裡 找到空拍機的Flyer 你就是那傢伙的助理嗎 不是 我是他的助理 但是有一天他生病了 他讓我去做 我完全搞砸了 就這樣 原來如此 我們還有五十六分鐘 有任何問題嗎 你知道媽媽 正在重新結婚嗎 什麼 她 嗯 我覺得我們應該 稍後再討論 不 現在是時候討論 那是一場壞的職業日 如果我們沒有更好的講師 我們必須重新上課 我已經受不了 那些無法活的魚眼了 作為學生活動委員長 我有個主意 我一直在想 她在做什麼 講師很窮 因為我們只讓任何人做 地下人Willy 地下人Willy的敵人Seamus 對 Seamus 九十分鐘 看一個人在廁所裡喝酒 我認為我們應該 去Springfield的講師部 好主意 Seamus 我們不需要你再說話了 什麼 這是你做的Willy 我會把你的屁股 翻過來 噢 你說話像個詩人 但你打得像一顆茶 你這個混蛋 哇 華爾街 Marvin Hamlisch Mark Furman Procter & Gamble的前總裁 我們這個月有個特別節目 Mr.Blackwell對Mr.Tea的辯論 Oh please I've seen nicer chains than a set of snow tires I pity the fool who derives self-esteem from mocking other people's clothes I hate myself Oh Here's a wonderful speaker Jeff Jenkins Who He created a cartoon called Danger Dog It's popular with kids and adults Yes, fine, he'll do Anything to end this unstructured conversation And in a gutless act of political correctness Pizza Day will now be known as Italian American Sauce Bread Day Now that's a sensitivity Right Giuseppe Giuseppe is such a happy monkey And now today's guest speaker The creator of Danger Dog Jeff Jenkins Next month we'll be airing the Danger Dog Easter Special Would anyone like to see a sneak preview? Danger Dog Nutterville needs you I hope this is important I've got a hot date tonight With Sarah Jessica Barker Nice Anyway Your archenemy Molly Ringworm Has threatened to destroy the city With her pukery The mayor's barf Is worse than his bite Oh Le mon juste If you freeze the frame You can see that the chunks of barf Are actually pictures of our animators And their friends Are there any questions? Here, right here Yes, you What state does Danger Dog live in? Michigan Next Why does Danger Dog Mean more to me than school or church? Because those things suck Well, I have a question, Mr. Jenkins Could you tell us about all the hard work And buckling down That you put into every cartoon? Are you kidding? This is the easiest job in the world I spend most of my time eating candy And going to R-rated movies Well, then Tell the children How hard you studied in school To get where you are today Studied? Kids, all I ever did Was sit in class and doodle Like this one It's what your principal Would look like as a woman Fire, children Hurry outside There's no time to let Today's lecture sink in Why'd you do that? I won't stand by While you're glamorizing sass Now those youngsters Will throw their lives away Drawing things that never were I'm coming up with My own cartoon character He's called Danger Cat Mine's called Trouble Dog I'm called Ralph Mine is Danger Dude But he's a dog Well, I'm my own toughest critic But I think it's genius Now to sell it for millions This comic strip is lame and derivative I'll be the judge of that Oh, wait Stan Lee Creator of Marvel Comics? Greetings, true believers Oh, my heart is pounding Like Thor's hammer On Dr. Doom's Titanium-infused faceplate Hey, aren't you the guy Who was stalking Linda Carter? The term is courting? Restraining order says no, no But her eyes say yes, yes Let's see what you've got, son My spidey sense is tingling It's that good? Whoa, did I say spidey? I meant stinky Enough said What did I do wrong? I don't know Try everything Now hold on, comic book guy This boy's still finding his voice So you're saying I should keep trying? Absolutely And if you fail You can always open a comic book store Stan Lee insulted me But in Bizarro World That means he likes me I just need one great idea Batman It's been done Green Lantern I like Little Dot Could you rip that off? I mean, who's gonna know? I'd know, Mom That little girl sure loves dots All I need is one classic character What did you do? Stupid lawn chair Come on Unfold you Hey You'll teach that stupid chair I'm on fire I hope no one's drawing this Help Hey Always drawing your old man, huh? You must think I'm the greatest dad in the world Minor setback This world sucks Don't you hate carpet stores That charge extra for the under padding? I hate them so much Tonight When dinosaurs get drunk Oh I've been there, man Has been cancelled Instead, we bring you The boring world of Niels Bohr My ice cream sandwich And where the hell's the remote? Why do people keep moving it? Stupid This is perfect Couple of stink lines around his butt And I'm done Avery dad rocks Argh I'm angry That's like something my dads would say Simpson You created a timeless comic character Thanks guys Will you sign Martin's cast? What cast? I won't be swimming this summer Barg This is just dad It's a composite character Your dad, my dad A little Maggie's dad No, it's just dad Maybe angry dad needs a sidekick Know-it-all sister Can she have a pony? And the last line in the scene Hmm Your penciling is sub-ziggy And the main character is off-model In every frame However I deem this Reck-worthy Wow, I made it My week-long dream has come true Hold it, son Wouldn't you rather have An exciting action figure? But only Batman fits in my Batmobile Are you nuts? The thing fits in there perfectly Look, he's fitting right now Stan Lee came back? Stan Lee never left And I'm starting to think That his mind is no longer in mint condition You broke my Batmobile Broke? Or made it better Now I can't stand in line anymore Bart Simpson, creative genius What does it do to you? I'm from the Internet We'd like to turn Angry Dad Into an animated series Wow, Angry Dad An Internet cartoon I'll be in cyberspace Next to the Nabisco cookie website Hey, Soul Patch You cut the line Here's my card Wow, this is people working? This is great Hey, Bart Care for a children's cappuccino? What up, man? This is my manager Slash sister Lisa What up? Everyone here loves Angry Dad It's just what we've been looking for So what do you want to do with it? Bart, I'm not a woman And I can't have babies But I can give life To animated Internet cartoons Let me show you One of our hottest shows Bin Laden in a blender Well, it delivers What it promises Now, Bart We can't pay you salary But we can give you stock How's your company Gonna make money? Do you have a business model? How many shares of stock Will it take to end This conversation? Two million It is done Now, let's watch Another of our great cartoons Lou Rawl's Secret Agent You'll never find That microfilm of mine Bart Meet the voice of Angry Dad OK, let's hear it Well, I was thinking of something like I'm a big bad idiot Wow, I think we have our Angry Dad When do I get paid? In 2012 Now we just add color In five minutes It'll be on the World Wide Web I can't wait that long To pass the time Help yourself to some more stock Wow, that's funny There's only one way My show can compete with this Look that animal That always chomps on my groin Susan Anton? No, the lemur Oh, what a day Maybe the headlines will cheer me up That's opinion, not news That guy's hilarious I especially like his white shirt and blue pants Wait a second Angry Dad, it's me Yeah, didn't you know You've been world famous for an hour now You're the Internet's number one non-porno site Which makes you ten trillionth overall What kind of a monster Would humiliate me like this This has been a Bartoon presentation In association with iKarumba Entertainment Like that, little Stupid Bartoon Bartoon, that's clever I'm gonna kill him It's Internet buffoon Angry Dad Let's send him into one of his trademark fits Hey, come on, make your eyeballs Stop it The more you rock, the angrier I get You heard the freak Leave me alone I'm Angry Dad This job, dirty How to press this button Attack Angry Dad, you're fired My monster Hold on, what are you doing We're just rehearsing for Angry Dad, the motion picture How would you like to be played by John Goodman That's so obvious It should be Gary Oldman Dad, I'm no fan of Bart's cartoon But you have a real problem with anger I'm just passionate, like all us Greeks No, you're angry Look, you're punching the cat right now Oh, I am Oh my God, you're right I'm a rageaholic I just can't live without rage Congratulations, Dad The first step is admitting it Is it also the last step No, the last step is quitting Very well I'm not gonna be Angry Dad for one day longer I'm giving up anger forever If you ask me, you should give up fatty foods I said anger Did it again Where the hell is that soothing music coming from Hello, what's going on I gave up anger forever From now on, I'm into candles, soft music And horse tank riding I'm not gonna be Angry Dad for one day longer Nothing can make me mad out here Milkman Piano Lady Must suppress rage Get in there Come on, Angry Dad, get angry Don't make me do a clip show Hello there, bland diddly danders Hey, Homer I've been singing your praises all day Marge said we could have choir practice in your house tonight Here's a preview God said to Noah Build yourself an archie, archie Animals came on by Onesies and twosies, twosies Elephants and kangaroosies, roosies This little trap is gonna make my dad angrier than he's ever been In the meantime, I gotta tell those internet guys to hold tight Can I come too Good idea, you can speak nerd to them I'm not a nerd, Bart Nerds are smart My god, what happened They went belly up like all the other internet companies Looks like the bubble burst Bubbles can burst Yeah, but it's a golden age for the repo business One that shall never end Bart, it's over Ow What do you mean it's over We're bankrupt The stock is at zero But I have 52 million shares What's 52 million times zero And don't tell me it's zero Bart, it's not about how much stock you have It's about how much copper wire you can get out of the building with Guys Looks like you can't retire by age 12 Yeah, but at least now that my show's cancelled I don't need material So there's no need to lure my dad into the trap I set for him The trap They call me Mellow Yellow Quite rightly This mellow never bellows Quite rightly Hmm This looks suspicious But delicious Oh, dirty diapers on strings Time to put this ordeal behind me God, his pants stayed on It's the Incredible Hulk He can't be the Hulk I'm the Hulk Oh, please Couldn't even change into Bill Bixby Come on, dammit Change Forget it I really did it once Yes, yes I just wish you had the power to leave my store Almost had it there Frank cost 10 million dollars in damages I know, I'm sorry Sorry for what? Saving your father's life? It's true You see, these boils on Homer's neck are pent up rage If Bart's trap hadn't set Homer off The anger would have overwhelmed Homer's system You mean I shouldn't punish Bart at all? Why, if anything, he should punish you OK Well, Stern, I want to show you how grateful I am Let's go fishing Who knew that anger was saving my life? Say it, don't spray it You're trying to get me angry? Thank you You're not welcome I love you, boy You love a boy Stop it now If you love me so much, why don't you marry me? That's a good one