Healing Your Inner Critic ASMR REIKI Soft Spoken Personal Attention Healing Session

Whenever you're trying something new, do you have this feeling, this little voice inside that's saying, why'd you do it like that? You can never do anything right. That's not good enough. Well, this is our inner critic and so for today's gentle ASMRiki session, we are going to be grounding you and helping you to just turn that inner critic down or place it somewhere in the mental plane that isn't taking up your entire field of vision. We're going to shrink it and place it to the side. So this is actually a method that I use in my book, Self Loved, which there is an audiobook version coming soon. So if that's available, I'll leave that down below, but I'm very excited about it. So today we're going to just arrive right here now. We're going to be hopefully helping you to relax and to release some of that fear because when we allow our inner critic to take over, that's when we stop acting from alignment and we start acting from fear, projecting ourselves into the future, casting our gaze into that future of perceived undesirable results, this fantasy that the world is, you know, harsh and unkind and we're not good at fitting into it. All of these narratives that we hold on to in hopes that we protect ourselves are actually the reason that we're not able to fulfill our potential and that we feel like we're constantly coming up against these barriers. So if that sounds like you, it's not your fault. You haven't done anything wrong. But for today's video, I'm just going to offer you a different way of doing things. I'm going to start with this Agravati incense stick from the Pure Incense Kit. Put this little satchel in with some of my other smudge sticks so you'll have to forgive some of the charcoal smudge sticks from my incense and my big sage bundles. What we're going to start off with here is doing some smoke cleansing to help you clear and cleanse just that superficial layer, that first layer of criticism. And here's the thing that I've really learned about criticism over the years. That inner critic that we have, that self-judgment, is it's honestly, it's fueled by a few things that are so within our power to shift. One of them is the judgments that we carry about others and this really, really belies the own judgment that we have for ourselves. So what I would suggest is just starting to gently bring your awareness to any judgment you might have for others. This is not a form of self-punishment to say, gosh I'm so bad at that, I'm really judgmental, but more so it's just to sort of shine a light on the ways in which you're being really unkind to yourself. And when we're unkind to ourselves, it's much more difficult for us to show up in a way that's going to be supportive, helpful, useful, connected to others, present with, right? But it's also just important for you to be kind to yourself as well. So let's look in here, see what we want to use. I have two different types of incense in this guy. So we're just going to invite this smoke into our sacred space to clear and cleanse anything that's not serving you. One thing that I found really helpful in my journey was recognizing who the voice was of that inner critic. And you might find, you can probably hear my dog, she's far enough away so that none of the the potions and incense that we're using for this is gonna affect her, but you might hear drinking water, scruffling at home. Anyway, that's why we have the window open and you can hear a little bit of the ocean. But anyway, bring me back guys, what were you talking about? The, yeah, this method that helped me out with kind of healing that judgmental negative voice was recognizing who that voice is. A lot of the times this voice comes from formative years, maybe from our childhood, maybe it was a parent or a sibling, a family member, maybe it was a friend, a teacher, someone you went to school with, a mentor, maybe it was a neighbor or a family friend, but someone maybe along the line made you feel like you being yourself, who you are, and how you choose to move through the world is either not enough, not good enough, or too much. Not enough and too much. And I want to tell you right now that exactly how you are, exactly how you are, is exactly how you're meant to be. Like, it's, we should just be accepting who we are, where we are. If we're constantly, you know, in this competitive kind of feeling, how boring would the world be if we were all the same? How boring. We don't want to try to be someone else's best version. We want to be the best version of ourselves. And this means, you know, committing ourselves to self-loving, disciplined actions, to really look up to our potential, and to say, I love myself enough to work on this passion project, or, you know, get healthy and fit, or, you know, put myself out there, and whatever it is that you're moving towards in your journey, I'd always love to hear. I love reading your comments, especially about where you are in your journey. I love when you chat about in the comments. But, um, let's just let all this lift. Let's release it out into the sea. Let the salt water just cleanse and transmute any of this toxic energy that we want to clear. Breathe it out with me. Let it lift. So, you know, recognizing where that voice comes from, and even giving it a name, whether you want to name it the name of that person who affected you in that way when you were a kid, or that's the voice of, like, that's the voice of my brother. That's the voice of my cousin. That's the voice of my aunt, or my father, or mother, or sister. That's, that's them. You know, that's not me. That's not my thought. That's not my feeling about this. That way, we can kind of separate and start to recognize that we have agency over what we choose to believe. And if it's not serving you, why are we believing the worst about ourselves? Because, I can't remember who said this, but I was like, we all have within us the king, the queen, king slash queen, and the fool. And the person who shows up is the person who you talk to. So, are you going to talk to your inner king, your inner queen, or are you going to talk to your inner fool? And that's just such an important thing to think about, to recognize. It might be a biblical reference, but that's just an important thing to kind of bring to mind. It's like that same idea of we all have a black wolf and a white wolf within us, a dark wolf and a light wolf, and whichever wolf grows is the one that we feed. So, are you going to feed your mind those, you know, kind of darker thoughts, that sense of disempowerment, those critical, judgmental thoughts? Or are you going to feed the wolf of sparkling, warm light, that wolf of kindness and empathy and compassion and empowerment and confidence? You can also give these different really critical aspects of yourself a name that is of your own making. If you don't want to constantly be thinking about someone who maybe you felt like doesn't feel very empowering to remember those things, you could give them a name. You know, you could name them something that you find funny or that you can kind of see from a light-hearted perspective. I tend to catastrophize things. Sometimes I get into very anxious, when I get into an anxious zone, I tend to catastrophize things. And so, I call that part of my psyche that's the chaotic Kathy. She's always thinking about the worst case scenario. She's just so like, well, did you think about the possibility that if you do that, then this could happen and the whole world will fall apart? And I can just be like, Kathy, let's take it back a minute. That's probably not going to happen. That's probably not going to happen. It's probably going to be okay. And it'll be about something that when I'm not in that headspace and I can kind of process it, I'm like, what in the world? That was so delusional. If we have the choice as humans, if we have the choice to be, you know, living in our imagination and coming up with these amazing creative things, if we can choose to imagine anything we want, why in the world would we imagine the worst case scenario? But Kathy wants that. That's what she wants. She feels like that's her job. So, there's a place for Kathy. Like, there's a place for, you know, all of the different parts of our psyche, but we are sometimes allowing them to really run the show and to influence all parts of our lives. And then that critic, you know, that critical lens starts to become pervasive and take over and kind of bleed into all the aspects of ourselves. I'm going to do a lot of cleansing here. This is just, we need to do some deep cleansing. We're going into a deeper level here, but we need that critical voice. We need that critical voice to make sure that we're living up to our dreams, that we're doing the best that we can. We need to, you know, listen to that voice when, you know, maybe we're maybe we're in the wrong and we need to really take ownership. That inner critic can be helpful to listen to and as a guide in moments where we need to hold ourselves accountable for something. And accountability is so powerful for all connections, all connections, romantic, friendship, parental, you know, parent-child relationships. It's so helpful to be, hold yourself accountable to your actions and your mistakes. You know, as an employee or an employer, it's so helpful to be accountable and it's not, it's something that I think we really struggle with because there's so much kind of negative energy around taking ownership of something, that being who you are. You know, it's kind of scary for people to acknowledge that they make mistakes. This is a huge, this is a huge fault of our current society, I think, is that we're not allowing for accountability to become the norm and a free kind of thing. So, but I think it's so important in every relationship. Accountability is just so powerful. Renee Brown talks about that a lot. But, you know, the inner critic can help us be better, help us to recognize where we can improve, you know. The inner critic is what, you know, in some ways, it really prevented me from wanting to start this YouTube channel in a lot of ways. But I spent hundreds of hours learning how to edit, hundreds of hours learning how to edit. And I would do my free time, trying my best to just, you know, learn the skills that I could in order to edit and do this and learn about all the equipment and stuff. And if you are wanting to start a YouTube channel, leave my equipment linked down below. But, oh my gosh, like, I am so, so grateful for that inner critic because that allowed me to say, you know, oh, each time I would try, I would be like, oh, it's not quite there. Let me see if I can figure this out. Let me see if I can figure this part of it out, figure out the audio and how I can do this and that. And I think in that way, I feel really good now. It's a different story for me. It's much easier for me to do. And I feel quite proud of myself that I, you know, use Adobe and I know the editing suite and I know how to use all the software and it's, I just feel very empowered about it and I know how to use everything and, you know, all that. So it's, it's, it's very empowering. But I think at the beginning, especially we can be so, or it's not the beginning, it's sort of that, in that second quarter, that second sort of phase of learning something new, we can start to be really aware of how bad we are at it. Whereas when we begin, we think, wow, even the smallest wins, we're like, wow, I'm so good. I couldn't believe how good, because we don't know how bad we are. We don't even know yet how bad we are. So it's that second sort of phase of learning where we start to go, oh, wow, I'm, I'm, I don't know very much, but now I know enough to know how little I know. And that's kind of sticky place where a lot of us tend to stop. But if you can push through that, then you can start to really, wow, it's incredible how much you can progress and learn and grow. Okay, I'm going to come through and use this fan to help you sweep away any of those pesky thoughts that are preventing you from being present, because that's really all it is. When we are in that space of inner judgment, we're not present. We're not being present in the here and now. And it's just so paralyzing to really beat ourselves up, like you're being a bully to yourself, and you don't deserve that. So don't start judging yourself for being a bully, but just recognize that, you know, you deserve to be spoken to with respect and care and kindness. You don't deserve this. So we're just gonna start to clear, clear and cleanse any of this energy that's not serving you, okay? Letting it just wash away. This feels nice, right? It's a little bit humid where we are. You deserve to fill your beautiful mind with supportive, loving thoughts, criticizing yourself. You know, we often think the only way, you know, if we have a perfectionist mentality or something like that, we often think the only way that we're going to do anything of note, the only way that we're going to achieve any of our dreams or go after things or be a person of excellence, is if we are hard on ourselves. And if that works for you, let me know. But I have found that that actually doesn't work for us. When we can find that sweet spot of recognizing that we're not perfect, but that we're doing our best, and that we're showing up in the best way that we can, that is so empowering. And when we start to beat ourselves up and feel like, why aren't I, why aren't I where I want to be? Why aren't I perfect? Why aren't I as good as maybe that person? Or why can't I be better at this like I am at this other thing I do in my life? It just tends to paralyze us. And for me, I don't find it inspiring at all. I find it very inspiring to think, you know what, Anna, you're doing your best. You know, it's not going to be perfect. Like this video is not perfect. But you know, I'm doing my best. My, you know, my intention here before we start every session is that I can help you in some way. That I can create a video session that will help you, even if that's just to relax you or give you time to kind of escape from your day, or help you fall asleep, or whatever it is. But if I'm setting my intention to do just that, then it's okay. If there are little hiccups here and there, whatever, it's okay. It's all kind of part of the magic of this session because this session is you and me. So what I'd like to do now is I'll come in and kind of scoop out, pull and pluck, and scoop out any energies that don't feel supportive. And we will cast them into our sacred ashtray. We can cast, like, flick a few out on the open window. Okay, so is there something in particular that you've been wanting to clear? You know, something in particular that you're like, Anna, if you can just release my self-criticism over this particular thing, what would that be? Okay, let me scoop that out. I feel like because spring is in the air here right now, I feel like a lot of my sessions have been really inspiring calls to, like, cleansing sessions, pulling and plucking your energy and that kind of thing. Because spring cleaning is just, it's so empowering to make way, make space for something new. I also think one thing to think about in terms of that inner voice that's really beating in the inner critic is, it's, life can be fun. I think sometimes we get caught up in the seriousness of it, but life, life can be fun and joyful and light and effervescent and exciting and it can be fun. But if we're constantly oppressing that sense of play with criticism and judgment, play and fun can't exist if we're monitoring it and saying, that wasn't perfect, get back in line, that wasn't perfect, get back in line. Imagine a child, imagine instructing a child on how to play and being like, no, you have to do it like this, get back in line like this. They probably wouldn't feel as free or fun or inspired or light. They would struggle to have fun if there was so much heaviness pushing upon them. So let's lift it, lift, lift, lift, lift, lift, like a bubble lifting to the top, effervescent, just bubbling up, that's right there. In order to have that lightness and that sense of play, scoop, scoop, scoop, we need to trust that we're safe and free. And you are, you are safe and free. You are so safe, so free. I found the Olympics this year so inspiring in terms of the, the energy of the athletes. It's like, you know, just such an empowering thing to see people who are just so keyed in and, you know, just accomplishing incredible things and kind of living in that abundant mindset. It's just amazing and inspiring to see that. It makes me so happy and hopeful and it's just very, very inspiring. And to see the lightness and the play and the joy and the freedom and all of that, but it's, you know, that's all kind of married with discipline and, you know, it's a, it's a dance between the two. So it's not that we, when we release perfection, when we let go of that inner critic or gently put it to the side of the road, gently put it to the side of the road, it's not that we are saying, you know, I'm perfect, I can do no wrong. I'm, you know, it's not that we let go of our dreams or that we say, oh, you know, well, if I'm okay the way that I am, then I might as well not do anything. No, it's about following your dreams, finding that spark, that wow, and following those dreams, but not holding yourself to unrealistic expectations and being amazed by how you show up, being amazed by what can happen when you are fully present. It's incredible. And like, I can't, I can't emphasize enough how important it is to constantly practice that mental clarity we can control what we think. Emotions are tethered to all kinds of things, right? Our emotions are, that's our barometer, our inner barometer for what's going on with us, but our thoughts we can control. We can control what we believe, we can control what we think, what we feel is a result of that. It's a result of our external circumstances. It's a result also of the narrative that we build around our external circumstances, but we can control the narrative. We can control our thoughts and that is so empowering. So instead of thinking thoughts that are a disservice to you, to your growth, to your sense of self, to your worthiness, to your confidence, to your peace, let's start filling our minds with loving, positive, compassionate thoughts. Okay. You are so powerful. You are so powerful. You are capable of anything that you set your mind and your heart to. You're safe. You're safe. You've survived everything you've been through. You're so resilient. You've got fortitude. You're emotionally balanced. You know what you're feeling and you know why you're feeling it. And as a result, you can really tend to yourself, take care of yourself and be compassionate with yourself. You're so good at that. And you're worthy. You are so worthy. You're worthy of your own love, your work, your compassion. You're worthy of, you know, living up to your potential. You're worthy of all of that. And you're loved. You're so loved. You are so lovable. You are so lovable just as you are. You are so kind and lovable. There's so much in your life to be grateful for. And you're expressive. You're expressive. The world deserves to hear your voice. You have a beautiful voice and you express yourself perfectly for you. And you're why. You're connected and present. You have a great sense of perspective. You can parse through things and you can see the best route for you to take. You're great at making decisions. You're great at prioritizing what matters most to you. You're intuitive. You follow your intuition and your intuition and inner guidance always leads you right. And you are divine. You are a being of divine light. Light, sparkling, glimmering light flows to and through you. You are calm. You are peaceful. You are radiant. You are connected to source, to spirit. And you listen with an open heart. And do three waves down. One. Two. Good. Thank you so much for joining me for this session. I hope you're doing as well as possible and feeling 10% better than you started this session feeling. I'm sending you so much love and support and then telling you to be so, so well, okay? Lots of love. Namaste. This session is going to be all about just like sending love into the hands, our palms are these like entry and access points for so many different energies to flow in. So doing reiki hand massages, I find really helpful. So soothing. So I'm just going to be sending this energy towards you. I love using things from nature to send healing energy. You know, I love using things like driftwood, stones, all the earthly elements. I love using water as a healing element. So sending that love towards you and see if you can just maybe breathe it in, fill yourself up with that gorgeous loving energy. Imagine the aroma just swirling and flowing all through your body, which can be directed and channeled with laser like precision to help you accomplish tasks and achieve objectives. Cool. This is going to be a powerful time for you. Two super empowering cards. You have this fiery energy and you have like the earth and the roots, the roots and the ancestors. It's like star and earth and fire. Find as comfortable a position as you can. Maybe close your eyes. You could lie down. Whatever feels right for you. And let's begin today with gratitude. Whatever position you find yourself in, bring to heart one thing for which you are grateful.