"But It’s WRONG!” (Understanding Autistic Rigidity & ‘Explosive’ Moments)

When autistic children hit during moments of rigidity, it's not defiance — it's overwhelm. Learn the replacement behaviors and early triggers that actually reduce hitting at home and school.

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Something I’ve noticed over the years is that parents often get support for one side of this — but not both.
They may have a place to talk about how hard this feels.

Or they may have strategies focused only on the child.

But when the experience of parenting and the day-to-day realities are treated separately, the stress often stays high.

The work I do with parents sits at that intersection — helping children make meaningful progress while also making parenting feel more sustainable in the process.

Does your autistic child hit when something feels “wrong” to them — even something small, like a sticker on a weather chart or a sibling moving their toys?
You’re not alone, and it’s not defiance.
In this video, we look at how to support autistic children with big feelings grow emotion regulation. We'll dive into the real reason autistic kids hit during moments of rigidity, overwhelm, or cognitive inflexibility. When you understand what’s happening before the explosion, you can intervene early and dramatically reduce hitting over time.
👉 In this video, you’ll learn:
• What autistic rigidity actually feels like from the inside
• Why many hitting episodes come from overwhelm, not “bad behavior”
• How to identify the trigger early — the moment before your child loses control
• What replacement behaviors actually work
• How to use consequences without shaming or escalating
• What teachers and aides need to understand about prevention, not punishment
If you’re tired of consequences that don’t help…
If hitting feels sudden and unpredictable…
Or if your child gets “stuck” on something they can’t let go…
This video will help you see the root cause so you can respond in ways that support skill-building, not fear.
💛 If you’re navigating hitting or aggression and need personalized support, I work with families every day to build calmer routines, better communication, and a sense of steady leadership at home. Learn more about coaching here: [link]
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