16 DAYS OF ACTIVISM - Cele's Reflection

Mwafiti, manze ni mwaa miss, manze ni mwaa hata. Welcome to Seller's Reflection, another episode this week. And this week, if you don't know, and for those who do know, from November 25th to December 10th We celebrate 16 Days of Activism. Activism against GBV. So today, our guest, we are going to be discussing, We are all on the same journey to end gender-based violence. So today's guest, I want to walk through some of these things with Maybe I don't know, maybe you don't know, maybe we don't know either—after all, we all learn. Welcome, Mirian. Thank you. Welcome very much to Seles Reflection. Thank you for having me. Hello. Do you know hello? Yeah, I can literally walk to town. Yeah, thank you so much, Mirian, for coming. We were alone. host about we talk about GBV once in a while but now I feel like it's good to talk about it the more We're talking about it more, Nika tunayona sana, sijui niju back In those days, we never used to talk about it, so now we are more aware, AMA we are becoming more aware of GBV, but now I want to know Mimi as the person undergoing it, me as the person who has been in a violent relationship, I need your help. This is not correct. Hamekuja for help. Therefore. So I want to know, mimi, as the person going through it, Me as the survivor, as you've told me, the Mnawaita survivor. Survivor, not victim. Not a victim. So me as that person going through it, I was late, I came, I came for help. How do you get that person through? Until then. Anatoka. Most often, in fact, vilo umeliza up to the point where you collapse, It means that MTU analyzed it would arrive even before departing. And most often, leaving is actually really hard. So the first thing we need to do is to comfort a person. You know you have to be empowered to realize that even if I leave I'm going to be okay. And most of them usually say I can't leave because of the kids. I don't know where to begin. And sometimes also the shame that comes with it So most of the time Nita kusikiza So usually therapy works in the following way: Maybe weekly And we start by first talking about the issue So even a mime kama therapist can validate you a You're not at fault. I know that sometimes people may think you're at fault. So I will verify you, meaning nita kwenyesha I know what you're going through, my friend. And now I will be able to process What is the cause when you pass through there? But then the most important thing is also what role. am I playing in terms of that because There is a difference in victim blaming. There are people who talk like you shouldn't ask Victim, what were you wearing? Ninini did not do anything, so you are mistaken. What is something. What did Uli do? Yeah. Many people do it, maybe because I came home late. Because we tend to think that uwezi chapwa bure. Exactly. You can't do it by staying lazy. Yeah. You slept soundly last night. So you did something. Yeah. But it still doesn't have value. You don't need to. If you do something you're not supposed to, you'll be beaten. Exactly. And that's the difference. Like everyone else would want And because I am an adult Don't rush to make your point You know we can handle the issue, vizuri But then now we also look at the role you play in terms of Most of the time we are tired Haiyanza gina kuchapua It starts maybe with me raising my voice So violence is inevitable physically So GBV isn't just about physical violence. So, that's usually actually what comes after. That's right, when I got there, it had actually gotten serious. So, we have different forms of violence. And tackling gender-based violence, We mean that you're harming someone because of their gender. So, the first thing in physical inakwanga yo which is kuchapwa and everything. But then we also have emotions. When a person is emotionally hurt, the verbal abuse, They're making you feel so low about yourself, so maybe anakudegrade. Even a stranger may feel pity, let alone a close person. so it makes you feel, meaning your emotions are affected. We also have economic. Economically speaking, that is, Marianne, she's a career woman. And then you tell me to stay at home, but I don't want to; I want to work. Yes, it's economic violence, if anything. That is, if I don't want to, or if I want to, it's fine. But I don't want to, so you're staying away, You know, Iyo Power ya pesa, so that nikwe niki kuomba. That's emotional and economic violence. And then we also have harmful cultural practices It was like FGM There is violence here Because most of them don't want to There are child marriages That is 12 years old Just because they've started seeing their periods They get married. Then that's also violence. So most of this That emotional one The verbal, nini, hauta wana, like physically, and that is why We don't consider it violence, but it still affects someone. So even within these 16 days of activism, we are commemorating all four. Yes, yes. Not just your violence. Therefore. Actually, hata sijongelea sexual, which is also something that happens. You don't know right now a person, maybe if six you will be angry with you will I didn't even know someone had raped me or sexually assaulted me. So that for those 16 days, he kept on changing all those forms. And actually, the UN usually has a video. that discusses every form of violence. Nsatadhe Harassment on social media which I don't know if you've ever experienced. They are still gender-based violence. Cyberbullying, yes. So now, maybe someone comes out to you because you've posted something, Because as a woman, you're not supposed to post that. So if they choose to target you, that's still violence. So in any case, you're supposed to seek therapy. The only problem is, we seek therapy only when the pain becomes unbearable. I am not going to do that. Yes. So if, at the very least, my partner is telling me to quit your job, I don't care about that at all. Like, I'm serious, I'd rather stay at home than go out. mini endangered job. That is something we're supposed to go seek therapy for. I'm being abused. So most of the time, tunasemanga, Usually going to therapy isn't the only thing. Usually, when such things occur, they are the result of conflict. I know, maybe you've been enduring it, and now it has come to the point of violence. So the first thing, miusema, First of all, unafa, you should know yourself. Like watching how you'll react to whatever might happen. The other thing about my partner. Respond in terms of it. Yes, that is the correct answer. We understand there is a difference between respond and react. React, you are the one who has been chosen to be like Jesus, the one who calls out to the people. But usually, the response is already thought of; yes, it's about holding back. And then the other thing about you. By the way, I was the one who was supposed to be invited. The mistake was made during the learning process. So don't do it, I don't like it. But then now you'll find that when you do those, Still, they are not working. working. That's where people usually now involve others people. So usually maybe it's their family, maybe it's theirCAMPAIGN, maybe it's the church Perhaps it's not possible anymore and then Sisa now when these things aren't working either Now you bring in the professional. So as a professional It's because I understand the the science behind things and I can help you where you are. Stuck. So mbota pata kuna I have, actually they cannot be I will. They can't say upon. So I will give you those skills so you can do it. So One thing in yetu nasemanga is very important. As a therapist, it's not my job to tell you whether to leave or stay. Like we don't provide solutions. What we do is empower you. skills for dealing with situations I am the one who has the most You see, I'm not sure what you mean by "tukiongea na we." This won't work; let me leave. That's what happens. Then there's always a question that we tend to I don't know if it's me but most of these survivors They tend to stick. They tend to go to the market there. So, this is what I see Hey, Ngekua, I'm Ngekua, I've been here since. Of course, it's not the chief's fault. Now we know it's not about being a leader But why do they tend to... You keep going there even after you've been beaten once You've been beaten twice, yeah, like you're not valued at all. This relationship— is there a reason? Is there a scientific reason why MTU Kwamilia tu? Yeah, yeah, yeah, and in my practice, I like to talk about childhood trauma. and the way it affects us They were great. Childhood trauma, I mean, experiences that make one feel like this person. Maybe the mother will be the one to be punished. You saw violence as the way to solve things. You were also severely beaten as a child. So you always think violence is the answer. So most of the time, now that you have reached adulthood, You see for yourself, this is how things should be handled. Enywe, I deserve it. I don't know if you've ever heard on this radio station, people say people from the West I don't know How true is that? You cannot confirm. I cannot confirm. but some people say My man is not beating me. He doesn't love me. Oh really? But that's sad. I know, but to them, that's what is familiar. so most of these survivors usually feel like The only way to show love is through violence If we aren't, you know You know, if there's no chaos in the relationship. Then it becomes boring for them. At the end of the day, most people like to say some people love drama. Because that is what is familiar due to what they have grown up with. That is one thing. And that makes you now attracted to people. who keep on, you know, Confirm this belief that love requires patience and hardships. The other thing we talk about the cycle of abuse, like Vile Inanzanga. As you've said, most of the time, it doesn't begin as violence. So it will start with a simple thing such as, When I think about it, I'll regret it, you know, Or I'll make you see, what you did was disrespectful. It was your fault, so you deserve it. So what will you do? You will say sorry. For making me yell at you. And imagine it's me who's supposed to tell you sorry. And then maybe I'll apologize. Then we will have a period of good times, the honeymoon phase. And then suddenly things come up. Tension builds. This tension is a pain, I am angry, maybe we're giving each other the silent treatment, or maybe it's just me, You know, so irritable, kasirika kasirika. And then to build up to the present moment, the fight or the violence, whatever form it may take And the cycle continues. So, you are our tension, then the violence. Then there is a period. on the honeymoon where it's very peaceful, and I apologize. So most of these survivors, atachapwa yes, they will say, By then I'm leaving, I'm leaving, this isn't working. But then the person comes with flowers and says sorry, They will not repeat it. And ukimuitia, the parents, They say they'll even go to church, to the pastor, to therapy. So you'll just be there, okay. And then we return to the cycle. That's what happens. It repeats itself. Yeah. And I'm sure the Kuna effects have been felt. Because if it happens at all, it's due to some of these people bringing it about. So maybe, a child with a big appetite. Yeah. Most likely. So if this person, Ume mwambia everything, I want to understand the challenges, I want to know how it's affecting them. How will it also affect this, how can it affect this? Maybe the relationship, or the people around this family? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Actually, the effects reach the individual. even the people around you. So definitely you as a person, First of all, you'll be walking on eggshells. This person will surely return, when will he come back? And then also... Most of the people who have come across it, the real reason they stay It's because the relationship begins so nicely. This person treats me so well, goes on dates with me, they show you. They love you, and that is something tunaitanga love bombing. Nwajwe, come on, come on, let it be progressive. You can't meet me today and tell me you love me. That doesn't make sense. So it has to be extremely progressive. But most of them do that and they win you over. And you see what else I mentioned as well. What my role as the survivor is Usually most of us Because, as I said We didn't grow up with love So kikujo ni onyeshe yo love What should I do? Nengia box very fast Because it's like finally I receive the love That I didn't have growing up So I stay there And then it starts slowly And then the next time it's a slap. then the next time there are blows there's this book that I'm part of a book club, and there's this book. Therefore, it is necessary to use young people. Focus on what you need to do and on your own learning. You know for you to be a woman for you to make you You are my only one to do as I do. un Need to humiliate the man beats the ..we are seeing the days of judgment and there will be no one to save them so fac Therefore, those who do and those who are doing. What is the weather like today? God. Therefore, the day of judgment will be terrifying. Very few days are seen clearly. Only this is enough to leave. e Many. Therefore, in the midst of our struggle, we are called to act, We are supposed to be true. Speak out against GBV Like there are some of those things that we are supposed to do as the people Yeah. Some of those things are because you know, pale online tutandika Stop stigmatization Well, we are speaking out about it, but someone must know what stigma is Only stop stigmatization on the contrary I will do it Even if the first post by the person mentions You go ahead, you're the one who's leaving, you're the one who's going to face the hardship So, let's speak out You know. Nice But I will oppose it in a way Well done I'm against this and this But when I found out, you told me about the matter from your father Labda is still doing July shinda and kina fulani fulani Yeah Yeah, yeah. What are some of the things that we, as people, should do to stop it? Number one, we need to listen. Especially general mental health issues. He told me I'm fine, just listen. And believe them. Most of the time, we don't believe them. Until perhaps when you're not even a speck, Then that is when you will believe. So usually listen. And listen, I mean... Listen and believe Listen, I don't know that we've been talking You can hear, but you're not listening. Like you, Nina told me something And then you go, ata mi by the I know, I'll listen So that's not listening. When I am busy giving you Advice and telling you about My story, listening means Literally sitting down And listening to what I'm going through Without feeling the need To have input because you're not The one Walking in my shoes, so you don't know what I should do. Whenever you do that, at least one person feels validated. And then also now the other thing is to make sure that now you can direct them to whatever help they need. And walk with them through it. You know, I get a lot of people who tell me, Those who come to me say they were referred by a friend. But then they vanish. usually when you refer someone you're supposed to to walk with them as well, to see what they are learning Everything, and then, as I said, don't advise most advice from a point of our own experience and that's the difference between therapy and going to your friend, your friend will tell you what they would do if it were them, like I said, I will I won't tell you what to do; I'll just equip you. with the skills and give you a different perspective so that But now you can decide what to do, yeah, so listen. Refer, don't advise, and also take care of yourself, you know, so people who, if maybe, say you're a parent and you can see your child is going through that or it's your friend, you can get worked up because you're really worried about them, like oh my god, every time You get a call from them, it's like "Ninini Saizi, what's happened?" So take care of yourself really well, and also beyond just your posts To learn. It overwhelmed everyone completely. Therefore, it is necessary to make a decision. Because you are about to kill a person for no reason, If that's the case, then it's inside. Therefore, the news reaching the starcha anaji Indeed, it is possible to do something for a child in a hurry. There are many, many. Therefore, the height of the mountain bo action. Action. against, it's not just saying or words, it's action so even when you know someone is going through that, if you see your friend committing violence, also called them out That's why those things they do make us suffer. because at the end of the day I feel like Men truly have a significant role to play. but usually it's us who Okay, I'm talking about women. They also go through it. but usually you find that both genders have a role to play in this regard If you know, working again against GBV, yeah, because, uh, I don't know why most of us actually In my head, Nikona's picture, a young girl, yeah, rarely do we think of men going through and is about us because of the double standard online, we are A man, a woman, Maybe he was beaten up by a woman, yet he's a man. Yeah. We are not men, why are we male? Yeah. But ikiflip, ikueni deme, oh this man, oh. So it's like we have double standards. True. We are choosing which ninitu. You too, I really like to support Mwanamuke, yeah, we've forgotten about him the boy child whom I do not know You're welcome. You're right, because most of us talk about issues of equality But then, we're still not really there yet, I think. the reason why we think of a woman First is because of the numbers Also, you can imagine one in three women for women, so that's why it's there, and then Also, the other thing is women—we talk a lot about all these things Whenever we go through it, we will talk to your friend, your family, if But usually, it takes a very long time for a man to open up. I have worked in Nairobi. Women's House: A Gender-Based Recovery Center and usually we usually see cases involving men on GBV so, so, so Therefore, this is the work of the one who was cut off. The person who does this is the one who is supposed to do the work assigned to them. Therefore, it's not a matter of being lazy to do it. Do it from doing at times. Therefore, this is about doing the work of making what we can grow. So they are there. But we laugh at them. So they have nowhere else to run. to until it's serious, I won't take it seriously. We were about to go to the police. The police even laugh at them. Imagine. I don't understand what he's saying. Usually they make it seem like it's fun. But. Wale who are also in need of someone to pay for them. Therefore, from there. Therefore, the wise man does not lose his way. So then, from there. So then, from there. The first time I experienced GBV. What does your silence on the first GBV incident imply? What a mess. By the way, that's a good idea. Drive slowly, just on the streets. Is there anyone who knows about GBV? By the way, Uta Shtuka. Therefore... But I'm sure we're headed there because the more we talk The more people hear about it, the more people learn. And the more people stop holding double standards. Yeah, those guys, they got them at the stage, so let's go ahead and catch them. At the kamagira, they are celebrating. Achokozo, eh. This panda, this panda I am sorry, but I cannot assist with that request. but Hamtusi I found two things. You're welcome to come and stay so amemtusi So that's also GBV Kuyo Kamagera but Kamagera is also an alliance with him so who do Out of these two, which one is wrong? That's why NiliSema reacting, responding So she's not supposed to react. She's supposed to respond. Do not react. Yeah. Just as I was about to leave then. Thank you very much. And then Arudi. And then. Yeah. Until the place where they are. But I feel like that's such a systemic, a complete systemic issue. Even so, the medicine is still effective. They need to be able to, you know, be educated against those things. because Mimi as one person I I really can't stop all of them. That's why no one else would do these things. Play your role as an individual within a community society and also the government with policies and everything that needs to be said so it's such a huge thing, true, yeah, but now that Why Indeed, We are so easy to react. Rather than respond with贯穿 What I'm getting is reacting very well to kwako. However, Like that, so very beautiful As if it were a dream Responding with such calmness with It's not the same Indeed, It is very beautiful. What matters is the expression of yo kuchemka with So, what's wrong with you? Yes. Kusane Tunisia is right here, let's go. And to the cashier. So I can decide whether to, you know, to throw punches at you or tukanane. I am going. When you see them, you'll know what to do. It is the beginning. It was Muhammad who did it. Therefore, doing so is entirely valid. That's what you're doing for the sake of the matter. At the end of the day. Thus, they are made to suffer. I made myself do it. It's easy to criticize someone else's decision. Therefore, In that relationship, it's the one who is mostly involved, the one who is struggling. You who have been affected, is there a reason for that? Is there a reason for that? Why is that person like that? Yeah, yeah. We usually talk about, unajua, me as a therapist, instead When judging someone else, we should also go and seek help. Because most of the time, they're usually going through something too. So reapply it again exactly as it was normalized for the survivor That you know violence is acceptable, and for him, that is what they witnessed. So perhaps they never experienced love, So they don't even know how to have healthy relationships. They believe that conflict resolves issues. Sometimes they are projecting issues they themselves have. Most of the time you'll find that maybe This man is going through something. And then they can't even come over to talk about it, you know. And you know the emotion then, In men, anger is often normalized. Men don't show sadness. Chua samanga wakona hasira. He, I hope you have peace. The ujui yo hasira is usually a mask for Deeper emotions like sadness, maybe they don't, You know, they are not in a good financial position. You find MTU anenda, maybe you call, they go drink, Then they come and cause chaos at home. But does it justify the actions they take? It does not, but the problem is some They don't even know how to handle it. That's why I'm saying they also need help. So if a client comes to you So if a client comes to you saying my husband did this and that, You're also going to tell the... Is it perpetrating this because one of the things in Yetuna Semanga? when we talk about current effects One of the things about GBV is that survivors tend to blame themselves. so we also need to understand What's going on, yeah, yeah, in society, Natuambia? but also part of the healing is being able to They were killed by the roadside for what they had done. many of those who were those who had fallen down the great thing about it is that it is mine many of those coming from That which had been stolen had been stolen from people From our homeland, I wish to go there that country, so that we may be able to come from Help that person, and usually we also people talk about narcissistic but it's it's it's it's just a The word that people loosely use—it's a very serious disorder, most It's just that someone is toxic. or you know, doesn't know how to have healthy relationships so also they need help understand that you don't solve anything by Why beating someone, that's why we say it's It's not the victim's fault; it's the perpetrator's fault. and then this perpetrator, we don't mean, now they should be left Yes. and discarded, they can also get the help that they need So I was talking about the effects, so effect number one The other one is self-worth. because someone is so used to bringing me down and telling me Therefore, therefore, therefore, therefore. So they are, you know, my body is being affected. Then you find that my self-worth drops. So most of these people tapata. A confidence in a shuka. Self-esteem Like I don't feel like I'm even worth anything. You literally treat me like trash. So I also start believing that. That's also why they have a hard time surviving. Because I don't know what I love. You see, because it's already really low Another thing is that you find people becoming very isolated. And that's also a form of abuse, like manipulation. Where someone keeps you away from your friends You know those people who, once you get married Stop hanging out with your friends anymore You have to ask for permission to go to your parents. So you haven't seen them for like years That's also a way for them to gain control over you. because now even when you go through these Things, who will you go to tell? Nobody. You have nobody. so the instant you realize that you can see Maybe your married friend is isolating there's something, there's something, and usually also It's because of that as well, and I don't want you to know. And also because of the self-esteem, once again. So I don't feel like I'm worth it in our friendship. What shall I tell you? I kind of feel like we have all sorts of human beings. Yeah, when you meet a manipulative person, like you can see such a person. I will manipulate you, Mari. We have to have common friends. My friends are many. Like all of a sudden your life is tied around you Like Mpako, who am I? You can't even discover. You don't even know yourself anymore. What did he say to his people and to Kenya? And that is also why it's hard to live. Because you've lost yourself, just like that. Utaanzia. Hello, friends. I have friends, maybe sometimes I have a job. If I fall, no one will tell me. And also for your children as well. I have a client who told me, "I wish my parents had just divorced." Because of what I witnessed growing up with them, you know, those arguments. I would rather have two homes where it's peaceful. That's why we say children don't need perfect parents. They need happy parents. So when you discover that there is violence at home, It also affects the children. You're not there for them. When you help others, you are helped in return. You will not even be able to give them attention. Yeah. So it comes down to it. Inaenda, inaenda. It's like roots going somewhere. Yeah. Can it end? Can you talk to someone? A change? I'm usually curious. I know whether there was violence or not. You'll see it in just one day You are very good at writing poems. I believe so but personally I haven't had any experience and usually you find that Abusive people don't really seek help. That's the problem. It's usually the people who are on the receiving end. Yes, we will start therapy. There's usually that meme. Because, according to them, they are fine. I beat you up for a reason. The day before yesterday You are Mbwana You are the one who should answer the answer So see you later help Come help me with my equal-sized boxes We are in a difficult situation. But if someone were actually Like you know take be taken aback and be like I don't want to be like this because I have actually Got it, I've actually remembered. I've had a man who was like that. Like, I don't want to be that person anymore, so I want to Learn how to handle things more effectively. and usually also going to therapy for people They see it as weakness. So it's like Niki Enda Yo Therapy I am admitting that there is something There's nothing wrong with me, so sita enda that's why you find it so difficult That's why things like this inevitably end up with people drifting apart. Because also, something we didn't talk about is that people feel like, I just remembered, People stay because they believe they can change the other person. You can't. That is, do you think that if I am nice enough, if I humble myself, If I come home early, then he will stop abusing me. He or she. they will stop abusing me, they will not, so most often you find that people just end up separating because they tried everything and it did not work; it took a toll on them until you break. and then now that's when you leave That's okay. It's better to be apart than to be together. and you keep on fighting every day, Kitamba, I think our mothers To They used to hide all of this. However, For nothing I know you very well, and you know me very well. Kesho, kisho kutua. Tomorrow, let's go. with Like they would cover it so thoroughly. But nowadays I think we're heading somewhere. Indeed, True, I'm going by the way. Hello, how are you? We are vocal about it. with That is a good thing. Because we've realized that it's either you talk Yes. Ah, the next thing we'll be burying someone. I'm going to go... Kamiti, I'm heading to Langata. Abare, that's a funny joke like that. Cannot be written. Kume, it's a thing. I was afraid it would happen, Knowledge is good for the family only. One going to Langata. Therefore. That's the way it is, They kill the family and themselves. Because now they feel like There's no other way out of this. Imagine there's a way. So I think guys just need to accept it For the sake of acceptance Accept si raisi I'm not going there, I'm not accepting it Mimi as the person who has been abusive Not even the abused The one who is abusive That's not acceptable to me, it's a problem Apo, it's quite difficult. And that's why tunasemanga We need to normalize therapy. That is one of the things that I What I do in my content creation to normalize therapy. Because if we normalize it and more people do, What I mean is more people should go for therapy. At a time of crisis and hardship, We usually just have something we need to work on. And see if you're able to do it maybe earlier on, say in your 20s, We can even work on how your childhood has shaped you. So unona utaenda kwa relationships. on marriage for these luggage that you have carry from childhood. So you see We will have already stopped. this thing. Therapy should be like going to the gym. We just You don't go to the gym to lose weight. You go to get fit. So in the same way that people understand wende. So that ikifika You're ahead even now becomes harder and it's弱点 a longer process to go through the healing and everything The earlier, the better. So tuna Nafatu is a counselor at a high school. I know. A few bags. He is 17 years old, maximum 18 years old. Yeah. But by the time you are getting into a relationship, a baby's hand, a bottle Urenda therapy at 35. Now they've piled up. Yeah. It has been many. Exactly. That's why we are learning these things. Ni awareness. Sit down, please, take your seat. Yeah. On the curriculum. How to handle conflict. How to deal with emotions And those traumatic things you keep saying Trauma Trauma There's one that I saw. Imagine me being with you for a lifetime Heart of trauma Imagine telling your mama, "I'm scared, I'm scared" Because you have trauma, sijui what, sijui baggage, sijui, ebuenda. Even your parent, who is ashamed of you, is nothing compared to you. Because they seem to be used to beat us. I had something that was causing a disturbance. It wasn't okay. It's ordinary. My mother was the one who was on this bed. That's usual. So imagine me telling her right now, Mama, I'm ending therapy. What I find inasaidianga is I go to talk as well in schools and churches So, want to help the child? Say kuna hizi chamas and like women's groups in churches Now someone else goes to talk about it because that's what my mom did and actually nowadays We talk about these things. because Halienda at the seminar your mom, and then they were taught about parenting, you know and you know how a child develops and now they can be to reflect and see Yeah, I wasn't exactly a good parent, but you can't tell them. Them. Atewe mamu ukona drama. We have many dramas. Did you know what I went through? To raise you, at the very least, you had a good home. Tuition fees—they'll never admit it, yeah, true. But I feel like we're headed there. Let each person do their own part. If you can't talk to, listen to, or give a listening ear to your friends. Listen, you from Mediana, shut up, don't speak, don't give your input. Advice You listen and make sure you listen to hear. Thank you so much, Mejiane. Welcome. Yeah, this is very much so, especially hizo siku kuminas(TYPE: 1) We should. Talk about it. Talk about it. And even for the men. When you're in a hurry, don't talk on the phone. Wanome. They don't want to. They don't want to. Actually, the other day I saw something—I don't remember which post it was. There is this person who is now advocating against violence toward men. And it was Rex Poet. Some people know him. Alienda kakomenta kasema, you want the women to speak for us. since we don't speak for ourselves, he posts such things and people criticize him a lot of them If it were the other way around, it would have been very difficult for the mother. They are very beautiful, those earrings. Exactly—men also need to speak up for themselves more. and because men also listen to men, so now I want, I want you guys, I want to plug you guys in with Marianne because maybe She can be of help to someone. Maybe kuna mseme sema, okay, Mary Ann wangea vizuri. You keep telling me this, that, this, and that. So where can they reach you? Yeah. Some people tell me I speak so softly. You're speaking softly. Like a therapist should. So in case they're interested, They can find me on all social media handles. Therapist Mary Ann. Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube. Even though it's dormant, they can still find me there. Also, I conduct both virtual and in-person sessions. So, the physicals are in town, the CBD, or along Thika Road. Someone might find me there. But if you message me through my direct messages on social media, I'm very active there. So, we can always plan how to proceed. Can I give you my number, maybe? Yes, if you're okay. Yeah, then the business number is 07-23629. 885 so they can always call or text Or WhatsApp me, nice. Yeah, thank you for helping us. Yeah, thank you. for helping us overcome Those traumas, easy times, we hear them, so at least We are becoming increasingly aware, slowly and steadily. So thank you so much, guys, for watching That has been our episode for today. For the next, uh So Ilyanza, like three days ago So for the next few days, please do something like stand up, stand up. against GBV wherever you are in that small space in that small office For the apartment, wherever you are, just do something. So until next time, bye. Goodbye.