연락할 친구가 없어도 잘 사는 사람들이 특징 (권진숙 교수)

Yes, what I'm curious about today is What are the characteristics of people who have no friends around them but live well? I think the characteristic of a person who plays well alone is a person with a very strong heart and muscles. For example, when we talk about relationships, People who are good at relationships with others say that relationships are good. But people who play well alone have a good relationship with themselves. People with high self-esteem So even if you are alone, you are not very depressed or lonely. Because you love yourself Because you are not awkward and anxious to be alone There are so many things to do even if you are alone. So we have a healthy inner self A person with a strong muscle in his heart Also, among those who have a well remodeled house inside When you choose to be alone There are a lot of people who use that time very efficiently. And now, secondly, Rather than people with an extrovert personality I think people with an introvert personality are more likely to get along well alone. Because introverts are mainly used to one-on-one conversations The reason why I'm used to being alone is Introverts are charged with energy alone. So even if you have a hobby that you like at home Because you keep charging your energy and do your own activities You can do a lot of fun activities alone. So these days, I live alone on TV If you look at the lives of many actors There are people who are alone at home all day. Even so, they don't have a hard time I'm lying in bed all day And then I'm cooking all day Even so, these people are not depressed at all The reason why I don't have a hard time Because that place is just a place to charge that person. So you can think of your cell phone as being on the charger. And there are a lot of people who are good at being alone Because extroverts do a lot of external activities and do a lot of interpersonal relationships Compared to introverts, It can be said that the ability to stay alone is a little lower. And introverts usually do something alone at home Extroverts work out alone outside Or drive alone There may be more of that So even if it's an activity you do alone We can get charged from outside Even if it's an extrovert So it's not that I can't stay alone because I'm an extrovert. Extroverts can get along well It means that the type of play alone can be a little different Because the way to charge energy is different And now to talk about another type What we talk about a lot these days is Self-care skill Do you have the ability to take care of yourself? But people who have the ability to take care of themselves I know how to take care of myself But for example, let me ask you one thing If someone asks you to take care of the baby And you entrust the baby Then how do you think you will take care of the baby? Whether the baby eats well, pees well, And if there's anything dangerous around I think I'll take care of it so that it doesn't get hurt Yes, take a look When we take care of a baby, we eat well, sleep well, rest well, Does the baby cry a lot, is there anything dangerous around And when the baby tries to catch a toy You keep taking care of it whether it's dangerous or not But when the baby is young, there are people who take care of it But when we become adults, who should take care of it? Myself? Yes, I have to take care of myself Think about it Think of me as a flower What would you give to the flower? fertilizer? What else would you give? water? And sunlight? Yes, sunlight And if the sun doesn't rise well You have to move it And we have to divide it Let's apply this to self-care Do you drink more water or coffee? I think I drink more coffee Right? If you think of it as a flower, you drink more coffee than water I know Right? And we said we use fertilizer and nutrients Do you eat a lot of healthy nutrients or organic food? Or do you eat a lot of junk food like pizza or chicken? I had beer and chicken last night In the old days, my mom didn't let me eat it Now I have to control it myself There are people who control it well There are people who can't control it well So one of the characteristics of people who have fun and play healthily alone I think he has the ability to take care of himself So these people have to work out hard You have to make me feel good And you can't leave me in a dangerous place You don't let me meet bad friends That's why you have a lot to do You have to live your life hard I'm a little upset to hear you say this I was going to call a friend after today and have a beer and chicken And pour coffee again It could be a situation like pouring coffee So if you think of your body as a flower, what are you pouring? Don't pour coffee there Don't throw away the cigarette butts We also manage flowers like that If you just think about it Do you take care of your body and your life? Do you care as much as you take care of the flowers? I think it would be nice to compare it If you were going to eat junk food this evening I hope you eat healthy food Then the other way around People who can't live well even if there are a lot of people around me Or people who are alone but can't get along well What are the reasons for those people? There may be many reasons I think they are anxious people Anxious people are very anxious when they are alone So, for example, you might think, Aren't you gathering everyone except me? I'm alone, aren't other people cursing me? While doing this, the main character of your life and the choice of your time I'm not doing it in a way that helps you There are a lot of people who are interested in how others see me outside But those people are anxious when they are alone And I don't know if I'm following the trends of this era Satisfaction with whether I can live like this or not Because of lack of confidence and self-stability I'm anxious because I'm anxious But the problem is that these people were invited to a big party What would it be like when you were invited to a big meeting? Is it good? These people I think I'm still anxious That's right If you are invited to a big meeting These people say this after saying something What does that person think? Do you think I'm good? And on the contrary, why does that person talk to me like that? Isn't that person ignoring me now? So no matter what the situation is These people are not very happy It's hard because I'm lonely when I'm alone If there are many people Did I hurt those people? Or am I not recognized by those people? Very anxious people I'm not happy no matter how I am This is the first one What is the difference from a person who plays well even if he is alone? People who are alone He is a person who can enjoy his own life I can live alone I'm a person who can enjoy But I'm the same person who lives alone These people are lonely So I feel left out These days, people who decide to live alone While having a non-wedding They do such ceremonies like a wedding Like that, there are people who are okay even if I am alone It looks like you're living well People who are anxious inside Whether alone or with many people Because I can't stand that loneliness and anxiety In the end, the house of this mind is an anxious person Then, such anxious people Can you be okay even if you are alone? There are various ways to help anxious people But now, rather than some therapeutic method Let's talk about how we can use it popularly It's hard to be alone Even if there are many people, it's hard So that you can play well alone I'm practicing So now we I recommend you to have a date with yourself What is a date with yourself? What do you think it feels like? Uh, I ask myself a question and answer Isn't it a process of creating a deep relationship with me? Is that a date? Yeah, I don't think I want to do it It doesn't look like a date It's self-taught It's not like that I'm having a lot of fun What is a date with yourself? I recommend you to have a date with your inner self People who play well alone You said you were close to your inner self You said you had a good relationship People who date with themselves are First of all, people who can't play well with themselves To people who are awkward being alone There are many ways to invite people to try this First, once a week Set two hours And those two hours are date time I said it was a date What do you do when you go on a date? I feel good and excited I plan what kind of time I'm going to spend today When you go on a date with someone you love Choose the course you like Or choose the course you like If I do this, will he like it? Right Have you been on a date recently? Recently? I think it's an old memory But if next week Someone you really like Someone really important Have a date with that person for two hours If I give you homework Your head will be very complicated But do you think you'll hate it a little? Or do you think you'll be excited? I think I'll be excited You think you'll be excited Right That's a date with yourself Think of yourself as a VIP Think of your inner self as a VIP Set two hours a week as a date time When I ask myself inside I'm thinking about what I like the most I'm doing something for those two hours But you can't do it like this Originally, I set a date time from 2 to 4 on Friday But I can't because I'm busy And from 1 to 3 on Saturday I don't have time all of a sudden I can't just do that Because my inner self feels bad I'm a VIP I'm not the kind of person who can move the time So if you're on a date for two hours from 2 to 4 on Friday What I like the most is If you go to a high-end restaurant I'm going to try Western food Then even when you're eating alone With the mind of dating my inner self I'm having a great meal alone With the mind of serving myself But I gave this homework to some people He says he has a lot of work He's so tired So he sleeps for two hours in the sauna It's a date for me So I go on a date with him once a week But you can't do this I went to the sauna every week I'll just go on a date with him What would my inner self be like? You don't like it I don't like it So something special for this person When you think about marriage When your wife does a special event You're touched That's what my inner self is like It's not just my inner self With a really precious person I love How do you spend time? What kind of time does that person like to spend? What kind of time do you spend with that perspective? That's what you're doing Yes, because If you tell me to do this Most of the time, what did I like? I start with what kind of person I like And what kind of question do I ask? In the meantime, I've been watching the company Even when I order food at the restaurant I want to eat spaghetti If the office worker in front of me orders soondae soup Me too We live like that So what do I like? What kind of feelings do I feel? And as I live a life that gradually fits someone I don't think I'm a very important person So the time I have The resources I have The idea I have This is for someone else Company I only use it for others But we don't make it very difficult Even if it's two hours a week Very intentionally Yes, I'm the main character of my life Don't just say You spend time, you spend money, you spend energy With a heart that really welcomes you I'm telling you to go on a date with yourself This Love yourself You say this a lot But when I hear that What do you want me to do? I think If you spend time with me like you're on a date with someone you really love I think I can think of myself a little more preciously So like you said You don't want me to say, cheer up The flower is dying, drying, and twisting You don't say, cheer up What do we do with a dying flower? Give nutrients Yes We do something to save this flower But most modern people There are a lot of people who live a life like a dying flower But there are many ways I can do it for myself A lot of people just watch TV What you said earlier Drink beer Eat chicken Pour coffee on the flower But what if my favorite thing is to drink beer? Then it's okay If beer and chicken are fertilizer If beer and chicken are fertilizer, you can do it But I'll ask you honestly Do you think beer and chicken are really good nutrients for you? It's not like that Yes So many people say, I watch TV because I like it I drink because I like it I say this Honestly, we know You know it's not that my body is really good So it's not about relieving stress If I were a VIP Should I treat him to chicken and beer? If I were a VIP When this person is really hard I'm like abalone porridge I think I'll give you something like Hanbang Samgyetang So I'm a really precious person I'm a precious person to my mom But in the old days, my mom made me Hanbang Samgyetang and abalone porridge Mothers may all die You may be sick You may be busy And now we are not at the age to be taken care of by mom The important thing is that we don't have a mom, dad, or someone to take care of us So we say we take care of us It's not just about managing stress Like having a flower So take care of me like that So I actually did this Actually, I've done it And I've done it with people who live single What effect did it have? Oh, these people? It doesn't work for a week or two I'm very embarrassed But some people say I really wanted to go to a good restaurant I really wanted to go to a good restaurant like 100,000 won per person She doesn't have a boyfriend She doesn't have a family and she lives alone So I don't have a family I can't do anything because I live alone I've been living so lonely like this But I gave her homework to do this homework She went into the restaurant so confidently I ordered the food Because I'm doing my homework now And I'm the most precious person in the world It's time to serve So it was like that before It hasn't changed that much now But what has changed? Her mindset has changed Even if I go to an expensive restaurant and eat alone I'm okay Because my mindset changes She didn't care and just ate happily And then these people I'm getting more and more excited I'm practicing to love myself brightly More and more relationships are increasing In fact, there are people who started dating like that Oh, this is me The more happiness or something about the time you spend with me That person gradually becomes a more attractive person And you can give some kind of favor to others That's right, because you become a person who makes yourself shine Because the jewels shine more Other people gather more So at the beginning The person who gets along well with other people It means that you can get along well alone People who get along well alone can get along well with other people What you just told me is It's a process that makes the psychological relationship you first told me So to put it simply Let's be my best friend So let's have a quality time with my best friend That's it Today, in a way, you said something exciting What would you like to say last? Everyone, these days, when I'm alone I'm very depressed or lonely There's not much hope in life There are a lot of people who feel like this As an office worker who is doing that kind of life As a person who loves the modern society How to remember how precious I am How to take care of yourself And my inner self I think it would be good to feel the vitality of life by practicing how to be a best friend Thank you Today, we saw Professor Kwon Jin-sook The characteristics of people who live well alone without friends And how I spend time with others and alone We talked about it So that's it for today's psychology Thank you for your kind words Thank you