Your Narcissistic Parents Will Avoid Going to Therapy #npd #narcissist #narcissisticabuse

Here's the number one reason why your parents avoid going to therapy. Whether your parents are the baby boomers, Gen X, millennial, what have you. When your parents are narcissists, they perceive themselves to be perfect and flawless. And that's how they want people on the outside to perceive them. Okay, so they're delusional and they obsess with having the perfect life, the perfect family, you know, being good looking and associating themselves to good looking people and, you know, successful affiliations. So you have to look at your parents, you know, the same way. If you were like me and you had a developmental disability, you were ADHD, autistic, you know, dyslexic, you know, you had some type of mental disorder or developmental disability as a child, then you'll know firsthand that you know having a narcissistic parent they will view their child's disability as a personal flaw and they will overlook getting their child any therapy or any help they won't even get their child evaluated because they look at their child's disability as a flaw to their own personal um you know it ruins their reputation it makes them look like a bad parent they're more concerned with other people think of them you know and their disabled child so they will hide their child from everybody and they will overlook they won't get their child any help any therapy because it puts a personal flaw on on the narcissist your parents whole reputation but as you become an adult understand um and you look back on your childhood and you realize just how abusive and toxic your parents were towards you and also that part of the child abuse was them overlooking uh your disability not getting you the proper help they neglected you emotional neglect um that's that let's just call your parents they're ableist let's just call for what it is narcissists are ableist they don't like disabled people even if those people are their children they are ableist so yes your mother and father if they're narcissists they are 100% ableist. And if they, if you had a disability, mental disorder, learning disability, whatever, they despise you and resent you because you having a disability ruins and shatters their perfect reputation, their perfect image as a parent and a family altogether. When you become an adult, what you're going to do is since your parents avoided getting you therapy and help when you were a child, now that you're an adult, you're going to take it upon yourself to go visit a therapist, a psychologist, a mental health provider, and you're going to get your own evaluation. And you're going to learn things about yourself that you should have learned in childhood, things that your parents should have done with you. Your parents had an obligation to get you evaluated and get you treated, but they did not. And you're going to learn those things when you become an adult and you get your own therapy. Then once you learn about yourself and, you know, let's say you needed medication and therapy and services and you start dealing with your mental health and addressing things properly you're going to want to get to the bottom of things with your parents and that requires a form of family counseling family therapy but first and foremost it would require it would require your parents to be accountable for their lack of attention to your special needs as a child and if your parents are truly narcissists they're not going to do that they don't want to be accountable they don't want to be held responsible for being piss poor horrible parents and how dare you as an adult now that you're an adult your parents are going to look at you like how dare you point out my flaws I did the best that I could as a parent you're ungrateful you know nobody's perfect they're gonna they're gonna gaslight the **** out of you instead of holding themselves accountable for overlooking your special needs as a child so I say all this to say the number one reason why your parents your very narcissistic parents avoid going to therapy is because it puts a spotlight on the fact that they were terrible parents. You pointing out their flaws, their discrepancies as a parent, it shatters the false image that they have created to the public eye. They want the public, they want your family, they want your church community, they want their co-workers, they want everyone on the outside world to look at them as perfect they want everybody to place them on a pedestal and worship them like their god narcissists believe they're godlike and they can do no wrong and they want to appear perfect to everybody so you telling them asking your parents you know and you could be very respectful towards them non-combative you don't have to raise your voice you can have a simple conversation with your parents and say mom and dad i think it's time we all go to family counseling family therapy your parents being narcissists will take that as a personal attack this is why narcissists love to gossip about other people if your parents are truly narcissists then you watch more than likely you grew up watching them gossip about other people they gossip about their own children and the reason that they gossip negatively about everybody is to deflect it takes the attention off of them they don't want nobody focusing on them and their personal flaws so you pointing out the fact that they need therapy as your parents, it puts the spotlight back on them and it shines a light on where they fucked up as parents. So they feel attacked and they're definitely going to, you know, they're going to scream on you. How dare you tell me I need therapy? I don't need therapy. You need therapy. I did the best I could as a parent. We made sure you had food clothing and shelter we made sure you were provided for but what narcissistic parents don't realize is financial support does not equate to love that's the bare ******* minimum you chose to bring children into this world so why punish them for needing the bare necessities in life but if your parents are narcissists they will hold you accountable for being needy for needing food clothing and shelter and they'll hold that against you so don't even try to ask your parents to get therapy if they're truly narcissists they've been abusive your entire childhood and they're still doing the same **** ---- while you're an adult they're never going to change i would encourage you to cut them off um move on and do better in life be a better person be a better parent do everything a hundred times better than your mother and father did and they're gonna be pissed they're gonna be pissed off at you for being better a better person than what they are better parents. They're going to hate you off of that. But that's not your concern. Everybody has an obligation in life to do better than the past generation. If mom and dad fucked up, you are to learn from their mistakes and do better. Unfortunately, because they're toxic and dysfunctional and narcissistic, they're not going to like the fact that you're doing better than them and that you surpassed them. But do it anyway.